TTC via TPR 6/6/16

[dukegirlsc]

Hi ladies,

This is a check in for those of us (or our SO) that are TTC via TPR including donor sperm, donor eggs, donor embryos, gestational carrier, surrogacy or any combination of those. Lurkers are welcome to come in and ask questions or become a part of the check in!

If your status changes and/or you want to be removed please let me know!

I hope this finds everyone doing well!


Donor Eggs:

eroticantibiotic --I am so sorry for the way your donors cycle worked out, I have everything crossed for your 2!
dukegirlsc
hero7 How's the donor hunt going?
king26 --GL with your cycle! I have everything crossed for you!


Donor Sperm:


Donor Embryos:

cateyes I hope your appointment goes wonderfully today and yay for meeting the HouseCarders! What a gift!
therealbug --I'm thinking of you, and hope and pray everything is ok!



Gestational Carrier:

kmitch1 -- I hope you are doing well, any updates?

Grads/BFPS: Congratulations!!

dream2be3
therealbug

[hero7]

Happy Monday ladies!

The donor hunt is -- well -- harder than I thought. I posted another thread that some of you have responded to and I appreciate the input. We like one donor - she meets all our requirements but for some reason we are not ready to commit/select her.

A couple of her childhood photos show a bit of a goofy smile - all gums, no teeth she had braces (there's a photo of that too) and her adult pictures show a lovely, pretty smile. At first I thought this was our 'hang up' on her - goofy smile - But now I'm not sure that is really an 'issue'...who doesn't have some awkward photos from adolescence?

I think we need to see some more donors come thru the database to either realize she is the right one, or she's not. But then we run the risk of her being selected and losing out on her. Ugh! I don't know what to do - my hubby says if I feel strongly and want to pick her he is on board. I just don't know how to know if this is right! One of my friends did say, there will always be a bit of doubt in this process, and I think I'm beginning to agree there.

Anyways, sorry for the long update, but this is where I'm at. I hope the comments about the donor childhood photos aren't offensive to anyone...I hesitated to even mention it, but I feel like it may be helpful to put it out there.

Looking forward to hearing others' updates too!

[dukegirlsc]

hero7, I hope that more donors come through and make your decision easier, it's such an important one, I know how hard it is to be certain.

AFM: I started BCP last week. They are giving me the worst headaches, I have been off everything for 3 months and had forgotten the nagging headaches. My mock transfer and endo scratch is 6-28. Our FET is scheduled for 7-12. I've made all of our travel arrangements and all of my acupuncture appointments through the transfer date. So now we wait.

[cateyes]

We have a date! We will have a 9/2 transfer date. The RE was totally trying to push us to do IVF as we are "such good candidates to not even try" (like totally missed the "do not have $20-30K to try and now we have these embies that are ours and we want!). Then when I said no we want the Embryo Adoption he was like "well you should really wait a year and lose some weight". He was like "due to your weight this has a 40% chance of success instead of 44%, I don't think you are making the right choice but will transfer as long as you know the risks". BUT had NO problem if we wanted to pay 20 grand for IVF and said we could get in next cycle for IVF. It seems all about money and not at all about my weight. I don't much like him but ultimately we get to cycle with our embies!!!

I am good with 9/2. There is so much happening in our life this summer between moving, starting to sell LuLaRoe to hopefully pay off some of our medical bills and student loans, and a new job that it isn't bad to wait a couple of extra weeks.

Tl;Dr-9/2 transfer and a busy summer preparing ahead!!!!

[dukegirlsc]

cateyes that's awesome news about the transfer date!! I agree about the RE, seems a little strange to talk out both sides of your mouth that way!

[cateyes]

Jun 6, 2016 18:38:28 GMT -5 dukegirlsc said:

cateyes that's awesome news about the transfer date!! I agree about the RE, seems a little strange to talk out both sides of your mouth that way!

It was so strange. I was like-so uhm you have no problem getting me KU from IVF but you have issues with the EmA? I think it is because the clinic "lost" out on the 10k fee they normally charge for EmA when it is not a directed adoption.

[lemonliz]

Hi ladies!

dukegirlsc, can you add me here? MH and I are starting to pursue donor embryos. It would be nice to chat with TPR people while we're in the exploratory stages!

cateyes, that's total crap! It sounds like his comments were absolutely money-motivated. Also, I hate the weight shaming some REs do.

dukegirlsc, I remember that headachy feeling on BCP, it's the worst! Funny, I always felt mostly great on stims, and complete garbage before and after. Where is your transfer going to be?

hero7, a friend recently explained that the donor search feels a lot like dating. You can date and court several people and when you find * the* donor, you just know. And even if you let this one you're interested in go for now, she may become available again! You never know. I say wait and see what happens!

Yeah, so basically MH and I have no concrete plans but we're going to cast our net widely now. I'm looking for jobs that have IVF coverage, we're getting our names out there on EA lists because we would prefer to self-match because we want something semi-open, and we're probably going to do a few IUIs just for fun, too. Because why not.

We're just in the beginning stages of all of this EA stuff. But once I ripped the bandaid off, it felt like a good decision. It's not like we're committed to any one path right now while we're still exploring options.

[trytobearunner34]

Can I join the party? We are planning to cycle using Donor Eggs this summer. We meet with the nursing team and financial office next Wednesday, so hope to have more details for the next check in.



We have friends IRL who have suffered infertility, but do not know anyone who has used TPR so it is wonderful to have a place like this in the world where people understand!

[dukegirlsc]

trytobearunner34, lemonliz, I will add you guys to the check in

lemonliz, my transfer is in St Louis, MC.RM. GL with your IUI's and finding the perfect embies!