Post by madamewaffles on Oct 5, 2016 8:42:51 GMT -5
Hey. A decided 4:30 was time to wake up. He's currently passed out at the boob but I have no plans of moving him so I can drink my coffee in peace and quiet. No plans today. Starting to go stir crazy. I need to get out today!
Debbie downer post: I'm really struggling with life in general. I feel like I'm never going to get a good night sleep - this kid constantly wakes up even if not really hungry. And if he's sleeping, my H is snoring or my big kid is up for some reason. We have no family in the area so I never get a break. And we moved across the country last summer and for a variety of reasons, I'm hating it here. I'd love nothing more than to go back east, but we can't due to my H's job. I miss my friends and family. I'm also so over having a baby - I hate this stage. And to top it off, none of my clothes fit. I'm hoping once E get older, things will get better, but I'm just pretty unhappy now.
Post by littlesthobo on Oct 5, 2016 9:40:46 GMT -5
Grocery shopping today. L fell asleep in his car seat when we dropped off DS1 and he's still asleep two hours later, so I've been editing photos to print.
I also need to buy a couple of shirts and a sweater. And running shoes. My clothes are either too big or too small, and I'm so tired of feeling frumpy. And my current running shoes are too tight now; my toes are bruised from my run on the weekend. I really don't want to spend the money, since my plan is to lose the weight (down 8lbs since Sept 4!) but I also don't want to feel like crap in my clothes everyday until that happens.
Post by littlesthobo on Oct 5, 2016 9:48:39 GMT -5
Big hugs, rungirlrun. I'm sorry you're struggling. I know how it feels, like you're just waiting for something to change but you can't do anything to make it happen. I've been struggling with adjusting to two kids, feeling like I've lost myself, and family issues. It will get better! Is there anything you can do for yourself to bring some pleasure to your life right now? Go for a run, buy a new shirt, take a bubble bath, read a new book? A little something for yourself everyday that you can enjoy and look forward to.
Post by sarcaztic10 on Oct 5, 2016 10:05:02 GMT -5
I told H that I need to get my hair cut before I go back to work in a week. I am going to be taking off at least an inch or two of hair. I just don't want to feel frumpy on my first day back.
Just hanging out here with L. He made a huge mess on the table with water this morning and didn't clean it up or tell me about it.
Are any of the slightly older babies on the board getting H over their gas issues at night? S still has a really hard time with gas after 3 or 4 am and fusses continuously.
Dealing with Dr. Jekyll and Mr Hyde today. I'm sure grandparents are mad that I cancelled their play date with Wyatt before their vacation. But my priority is to Wyatt not their needs.
rungirlrun I'm sorry you are having such a rough time.
Post by cabbagecabbage on Oct 5, 2016 10:41:50 GMT -5
I'm so sorry rungirlrun. It's hard as hell to have no backup. I can't imagine how tough it would be in a totally new place. What part of the country are you in now?
Post by cabbagecabbage on Oct 5, 2016 10:45:57 GMT -5
I'm planning a run to Once Upon a Child when DD goes to preschool. I was reorganizin clothes and learned I own one 9mo onesie and three 12mo onesies. That's not gonna cut it.
I grocery shopped and meal planned this week. Now I just have to cook the food. I've been in a rut where it's much to hard to prepare meals that aren't dumped on a sheet pan or crockpot.
I told H that I need to get my hair cut before I go back to work in a week. I am going to be taking off at least an inch or two of hair. I just don't want to feel frumpy on my first day back.
Just hanging out here with L. He made a huge mess on the table with water this morning and didn't clean it up or tell me about it.
Are any of the slightly older babies on the board getting H over their gas issues at night? S still has a really hard time with gas after 3 or 4 am and fusses continuously.
Hope you like your new 'do! A is one of the older babes. His gas is not gone, per se, but it is much less severe and he can now soothe himself back to sleep in his crib after he gets it to pass. Hope S starts outgrowing it soon.
Post by jewelsofthenile on Oct 5, 2016 10:59:41 GMT -5
rungirlrun i feel your pain on having no help in the area. It can make it really rough for me too and my little baby does pretty well sleeping at night.
And for me i am soaking up the baby snuggles cause i go back to work tomorrow.
Hugs rungirlrun. It can be very isolating having a newborn even if you have support near by. I hope things get easier with sleep and you find your groove soon.
Just hanging out while they continue demo on our neighbor's house. DH is sick but had to go into work for a few hours. I'm trying to get the baby down for a nap so I can do a little cleaning. I found out my start date with work got pushed back to November 14th. I'm super happy to have another week home with her. She'll be a few days shy of 4 months when she starts now.
rungirlrun, I'm sorry that things are so hard. Do you have any acquaintances you could reach out to? If someone asked me to cuddle their baby for a few hours and I only kind of knew them, I would probably say yes. We also live far from family, and one of my neighbors kept offering to help. I finally asked her if she'd walk with me to help me keep my sanity. Now she has offered to babysit, and I plan on taking her up on it at some point.
Hugs rungirlrun hang in there, you'll find your groove again. Babies are hard work especially when you don't live close to family/friends. Don't know if it's an option for you but after we had our second H slept in the spare bedroom till she was in her own room. H has a monitor in the older kids rooms and deals with any wake ups from them. I don't want to smack him for snoring or because he's sleeping peacefully while I'm dealing with a baby. We all sleep much better.
I'm just chilling with a sleeping baby on me while the toddler naps. DD1 had dance class this morning and it's the only place she's been behaving, threenager is starting to come out. My easy going baby has also turned into a crank. Idk if it's teeth or what but it's been rough. On top of that we sold our house and need to find somewhere to live. I really don't want to move, it's stressing me out.
We're chillin around the house. Mil is visiting for a couple days, so the kids and I picked her up at the bus station this morning. I had just about gotten ds to sleep when it was time to put him in the car seat. He woke up instantly and stayed awake the whole time, screaming for much of it. When we got home he slept on me for a whole 20 mins. Mil eventually got him to sleep again and he took a decent nap on her, but he's just not very happy today. Now mil is napping and I've got ds sleeping on me again. Dd has a cold and is supposed to be napping, but is playing in her crib.
Hugs rungirlrun hang in there, you'll find your groove again. Babies are hard work especially when you don't live close to family/friends. Don't know if it's an option for you but after we had our second H slept in the spare bedroom till she was in her own room. H has a monitor in the older kids rooms and deals with any wake ups from them. I don't want to smack him for snoring or because he's sleeping peacefully while I'm dealing with a baby. We all sleep much better.
rungirlrun like Glaze and you MH snores too and right now H waits until I fall asleep then comes and sleeps with me until S's first wake up where he changes the diaper. Then he goes to sleep in the spare bedroom for the rest of the night so I don't have to listen to him snore as I try to get both of us back to sleep.
At some point we will make the spare bedroom S's room and H and I will sleep in the same room (me with ear plugs) but that probably won't be until S weans. It's not the norm but we all get more sleep this way and I don't have fantasies of smothering H's loud snores with a pillow or kicking him repeatedly.
I'm right there with everyone about their weight. In actually 5 lbs less than I was when I got pregnant.... But my belly is all flab and noooothibg fits.
So I'm sitting in Starbucks at target in maternity jeans nursing B before I checkout. I bought leggings, two tanks and two sweaters. Ugh
I still have about 14 pounds of fertility treatment/pregnancy weight to lose. But I never lost all my pregnancy weight with DD1 until she weaned. I just decided I would go invest in clothes that fit and cover the flabby stomach for now. I track my foods on MyFitnessPal and just try to get in lots of walking but I am getting okay with not getting back in shape until after we're done BFing. It's not that long in the grad scheme of things I guess.
Post by sarcaztic10 on Oct 5, 2016 13:20:47 GMT -5
ellebelle I am carrying around 20 lbs of fertility treatment weight and like you I have pretty much accepted that this is just the way my body is for now. It took a long time to put all this extra weight on and it will probably take awhile to get it off. I am hoping BFing takes care of most of it...
I'm right with you all on the weight thing. I still have at least 20 to lose before I'm at pre pregnancy weight. I started Sunday cutting out all non natural sugars and joined a yoga/barre studio that I hope to make it to 3x a week plus my dance class once a week. I'm so sick of being unhappy with my body.
I've still got about 8 pounds to go. I fit into my pants but they're very very tight. I've got no motivation because after three kids my stomach looks like a war zone and it used to be my favorite part of my body.
Thanks all for the kind words. I've struggled with depression in the past so I know I need to stay up on my feelings to not go down that road again. I've talked about everything with my husband so I do have a lot of support. And my parents are coming to visit in 2 weeks so it will be nice to have help. It's just hard because the things that are getting to me aren't going to go away anytime soon.
littlesthobo, sorry you're struggling with adapting to 2 kids as well. I know I need to take more time for myself. It's just hard with nursing and the fact that my H can't really settle the baby. I usually take a shower after dinner, and my H hangs with both boys, and every single night when I get out of the shower, the baby is crying. I hate that my husband can't settle him. But I need to get out more alone so he can practice alone time with both kids. It has to get easier eventually!
cabbagecabbage, I'm in California, and my family is on the east coast so it's tough being so far away. And the west coast is very different from the east coast for sure. Plus we were in the city before and now we live in the suburbs, and I hate the suburbs so that adds to my unhappiness.
mugster, almost everyone I know here has kids which is good and bad. Good because we do a lot of play dates so at least I get to see adults. But bad bc they have their own kids to deal with so it's hard to get help. But we are going to get a babysitter soon. H and I need date nights, and I wouldn't mind an occasional break during the day. I just want to wait for E to be a little bit older when he's not eating constantly.
glaze, sarcaztic10, I would be totally on board with having my husband and me sleep in separate rooms for the time being. We'd all sleep better. But we have a 3 bedroom house, and both boys are in their own rooms. And as annoying as my H can be snoring, the baby is much worse. He grunts and moans even when asleep. So I have earplugs, go to bed before H, and H heads to the couch on nights where I can't handle him anymore :-) And he deals with our older one's wake ups, but we live in a small house so when the toddler is up, everyone is up!
But to end on a positive note, both boys are asleep in their own beds, and I'm doing nothing!
rungirlrun I am also struggling with 2 and my big one is in school 20 hours a week! Some days I feel like I'm not meeting anyone's needs and DD1 is not shy about complaining about how much I suck.
I feel you on the sleep thing. Sometimes it feels hopeless that this will ever improve and being sleep deprived makes everything in life so much harder.
One other suggestion, is there a parents' day out program near you? I found one at a nearby church that takes babies 6 weeks+ and I'm seriously considering it.
Why do men suck at having colds? DH has a man cold. Came down with it yesterday and is already through the worst of it but ugh. He went to work and was home with baby for an hour and a half. Held her once and she cried so he just left her on the mat even though I was still trying to eat my dinner. Then we decided she was tired so I took her up to start bed and he's not helping DD1 with her bath at all and came in the room with me and the baby, lay down on the bed, and said he couldn't handle the baby crying anymore. I've been with her alone all day and am still recovering from bronchitis that I've had for a week!
If you could spare some thoughts, please send them out. My H's cousin's boyfriend overdosed on drugs yesterday and died. He had been in rehab and was doing well, but unfortunately this happened. He was only in his upper 20's. Just really sucks bc he was getting his act together.
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