Rant: I was supposed to visit my grandparents next weekend to go see my grandfather in his new facility (for dementia patients; he had Alzheimers). My mom was supposed to go this week and then let me know if he was ready for more visitors. She's going with my grandmother for her first visit. (The patients acclimate for a few weeks with no visitors.) I find out today my mom changed her plans and isn't going until NEXT weekend! And I only figured it out because I called HER after some weird things she said in emails. The entire point was for us to go at separate times because my grandfather can't handle too many people at once and also to spread out company for my grandmother. Now I have to rebook my flights, work out a new weekend with my grandmother and sister, etc, which I would have had to do anyway, but my mom should have told me LAST weekend she changed her dates. Argh.
marshian Ugh, that is annoying. I hate it when people don't communicate. We can't read minds!
For me, I'm going out of town next weekend, and I was sick all last weekend, so I really need to get stuff done this weekend. And I don't want to do it!
marshian at first reading your post, I thought that was annoying but not an enormous deal, until I read that you had flights booked! What was her excuse for not telling you sooner?
My rant is that our babysitter cancelled for tonight because she wasn't feeling well. I was looking forward to a kid free evening. Oh well - tomorrow I will definitely make use of the gym childcare to at least get an hour to myself!
DH is finally starting his new job on Monday after being out of work since Thanksgiving. I will miss him being home because he has kept the house clean and done some little projects but it is time for him to go back!! (Is this a rant and a rave?! lol)
pinecone21 & sdlaura - She's been really bad at communicating with me and my sisters lately. It's driving us all crazy. Especially since in this case she was the one telling me she would keep me updated. I found a new weekend next month, but it's just a pain.
Rant- our master shower has been out of commission for the past 9 weeks. Total first world problem, but I'm over it! The construction company couldn't communicate, were dragging their feet and come to find out the work that is done is all wrong. Nothing is up to code and they never pulled permits! I've spend my entire winter break stressed out about this and trying to resolve the issues. I'm over it! I want my shower back!
They hired a new supervisor for the teller side at work. He's an idiot and knows nothing about being a teller let alone their supervisor. Come to find out, he's been a teller for 2 months. TWO EFFING MONTHS. There is a policy that you are suppose to be in your job for a year before being eligible for promotion, but of course their are ways around that. He's nice, but he was nowhere near ready for this job. Plus the manager is like, "guys you have to cut him some slack, he's only been a teller for 2 months". No we don't, because based on that reasoning he shouldn't be a supervisor. Ugh!
wineoclock - Holy hell, I'd be beyond angry. Is the company going to re-do the work or at least pay you back your money so you can get another company to do it?
marshian, I didn't apply since I'm pregnant and figured I didn't need the extra stress. Plus, I'll be off all summer on maternity leave and I know the manager wouldn't have approved. I'm kicking myself in the ass for not applying since I know she what the hell they hired. Oh, and he made a $2,000 error the other day and another employee is getting blamed for it. PDQ.
wineoclock - Holy hell, I'd be beyond angry. Is the company going to re-do the work or at least pay you back your money so you can get another company to do it?
That's the tricky part. The screwed up and never collected our deductible. Obviously after I figured out they were doing shady work we refused to pay. I did sign a contract so technically our home owners insurance will still pay them a portion (if we can't get out of the contract, which I'm working on). So basically, we will pay someone else to fix it out of the $2500 portion of our deductible that we've withheld worst case scenario. Best case scenario we can get out of the contract and we can use the insurance money plus our deductible to start over and have the work that is not to code ripped out and redone. Either way I won't have a shower for awhile. The three of us are taking turns in my sons bathroom tripping over a million Octonaut toys. Andplusalso our house is a jack and Jill so we basically have to shower at 7:30 pm before our kid goes to sleep so we don't wake him. It's tons of fun.
wineoclock - Glad you haven't paid them yet. Hopefully it works out you're not out of pocket any more than your deductible to redo it. Sharing one bathroom sounds like a challenge!
A rave for maternity pants! I put on regular jeans this morning, and I was like, screw this. No more button digging into my belly! I should have switched a week ago.
A rave for maternity pants! I put on regular jeans this morning, and I was like, screw this. No more button digging into my belly! I should have switched a week ago.
Yes! My jeans are still fine, but my work dress pants have been uncomfortable by the end of the day. I wore maternity ones yesterday and it felt so nice!
Post by starsandshamrocks123 on Jan 8, 2017 10:40:11 GMT -5
I'm going to rant about MIL to get it out of my system
Background: DH travels a lot. His project is winding down but that means he's gone more in Jan/Feb than he is at home. Our family is 2 hours away. My parents come up wed night-Fri morning (twice a month)to help with DS. They are retired. It helps I don't have to get up at the crack of dawn for daycare drop off.
MIL always offers to help but she works and it's tough for her to do the 2 hour drive. In the past on normal visits she tends to want to come thurs night from her work, stay allll weekend and go directly to work Monday. It's a long visit for someone who has no boundaries and gives her unwanted opinions about everything. DH has already had that talk. She's limited visits but complains we never let her see DS.
I've invited her up to help 2 times since Nov. Each time she's supposed to come on like Monday but texts the Friday before that she needs to change what day she's coming to a day my parents are already helping. I plan my life and work around this stuff and get frustrated when it changes. Like really frustrated.
So we have known that Jan/Feb will be rough and have been telling our parents for months. Supposedly she was figuring she'd use 5 vacation days. Yesterday she asked what days she could help and I gave her a list of days that my parents were not going to be helping. She legit tells me that her work is really busy so she could probably do some of those days but cannot commit to anything until a day or 2 before. WTF. If you don't know if you can help then why did you even offer? I have my days planned out through feb. I request wfh days ahead of time at work as well. This isn't like a whatever thing... I don't plan childcare for DS a day before. I don't mess around with that. If I cannot depend on you to be here then I'm not going to have you up. Id rather do it all by myself than risk you backing out at the last minute and totally screwing up my week.
So DH had a few beers last night and called his mom. He wasn't going to say anything but she started giving him shit that we might not paint the nursery (we like the color) and how it needs fresh paint for a new baby (cuz that's a priority and any of her business) so he ended up just yelling at her about how she only wants to help me out on her terms and that's not how it's going to work. I feel bad, but I don't
Tl;dr, my MIL wants to help out when DH is away but is unreliable and unwilling to commit unless it's a day ahead of time and now she will prob not talk to us for a month
@starsandshamrocks - Oh man. I would be beyond annoyed too. I can't stand when people offer to do something and then want it all on their terms. And especially if they commit and back out last-minute. I wouldn't count on her either. She's going to have to really commit and show out she can, or get over the idea of "helping".
Post by teachermomtobe on Jan 8, 2017 14:47:18 GMT -5
Rant:
My mom offered to host a baby shower for us which I very much appreciate. When she hosted my bridal shower we did it in CT where I am from because that is also where we were getting married and at that point in my life most of the people attending could travel there easiest. Now, I wanted the shower in MA (3 hours away) because that is where most of my friends are that I would invite and some family has moved up this way too. My mom is now considering hosting 2 showers so she can still invite some of her friends in CT who may not want to travel to MA. I think that is completely unnecessary and I don't particularly care if her friends are there or not. I know she is excited but it just feels unnecessary. I'm sure this comes across whiny and I'm very grateful she is hosting a shower for us, I just don't want 2 for no reason.
Post by starsandshamrocks123 on Jan 8, 2017 15:24:24 GMT -5
teachermomtobe this exact same thing happened to me with DS! I wanted it 5 mins away from my house in MA. With my bridal showers in CT a few years before, it was really tough. Then add being 8 months pregnant for baby showers.
I was annoyed that mom and MIL were so concerned about asking their friends to drive to MA when I did not even know many of them well. But I ended up caving because I didn't want 2 showers. It ended up being fine. My friends ended up making the drive to CT and didn't complain about it to my face at least. MIL and moms friends were all very lovely and it was a really nice. I just had DH arrive to help load the car and drove directly back home after.
I feel your pain and I don't think you're being whiny. It's tough. But it was one day and although annoyed, I survived. Now I never have to deal with it again hope it works out!
My Rant-MIL stated she would like to host a "shower" for us but not until after the baby is born and really just more of an open house with desserts and everyone can pop in to meet baby. So basically she is asking us to drive 4+ hours (without stops) with a newborn, expose said newborn to every cousin, aunt, child, etc who she invites, and stay all day entertaining people.
I know this may seem bitchy that we don't want very many people in contact with our child for the first few months but after what it took us to get here, yep we are way over protective. Plus, we have never had a newborn and I am guessing we will be exhausted or likely just not wanting to be away from home for 2-3 days.
cateyes Wow, that's crazy. I've heard of new parents having an open house to introduce the baby, but it's in their own house with their own guest list, and they decide when to kick everyone out. Hard no to the kind of event your MIL wants.
Post by starsandshamrocks123 on Jan 8, 2017 18:47:54 GMT -5
cateyes I'd say thanks but no thanks. There's too much risk with the babies immune system still developing. I'd use that as an excuse to hold off. I don't think the second round of vaccines is until around 3 months at that. I'd also want that stuff to be on my own terms.
Also, not sure if she mentioned a time line? Like a month after baby? 3 months? I know when I was BFing I was still getting the hang of it the first few months and even when we had visitors on our own schedule, they didn't seem to understand the "I'm going to excuse myself for the next 45 mins so I can feed my child where it's quiet". It was more of people thinking that they were there to see baby and thought their presence trumped the babies need to eat. People don't get it sometimes!
cateyes I'd say thanks but no thanks. There's too much risk with the babies immune system still developing. I'd use that as an excuse to hold off. I don't think the second round of vaccines is around 3 months at that. I'd also want that stuff to be on my own terms.
Also, not sure if she mentioned a time line? Like a month after baby? 3 months? I know when I was BFing I was still getting the hang of it the first few months and even when we had visitors on our own schedule, they didn't seem to understand the "I'm going to excuse myself for the next 45 mins so I can feed my child where it's quiet". It was more of people thinking that they were there to see baby and thought their presence trumped the babies need to eat. People don't get it sometimes!
She is talking for H's birthday, so depending on if baby is on time, at about 6-8 weeks. And I didn't even think of the whole feeding thing. We plan to BF and already get the side eye for being weird and hippy (don't get me started) and I am sure would not be well responded to if I disappear to do that odd thing.
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