Devastated - have to change OBs

[360blessings]

***trigger warning***

I'm so upset and I have no one else to vent to right now. I am in tears. I just got a call from my nurse at my OB's office, and long story short he won't be practicing past mid-February. He's private practice so he's the only one. But he's the only OB/Gyn I've ever had. I've been with him since I got married just over 12 years ago. He's helped us through 5 years of infertility, and when we finally got pregnant and our first son was stillborn at 33 weeks, he drove back from vacation to take care of us. He's been there for our two healthy children and our other 4 miscarriages. I love him and he has become one of my favorite people in the whole world. I am in tears and absolutely devastated. I don't want to go through this pregnancy without him. He knows me and my history without looking at a chart. Even if I wasn't pregnant this would be hard to deal with, but we are and knowing this is our last makes it that much harder.

[pixiepink24]

I am so sorry you are going through all of this.

[lindslew91011]

I am so sorry that you have to go through this. I do not blame you for being devastated and upset, I would be too. My only suggestion would be to ask him where he suggests that you transfer to, maybe he can recommend someone. Again, Im so sorry and I hope that everything ends up working out positively.

[gw3nny]

That is awful! I can imagine how devastating that would be. Hopefully he will have some good recommendations. A part of me is like, "what's a few more months? Couldn't he just keep her on?" I guess I'm nosy but I'm just sitting here like WHHYYYY??? T&P for you and your family!

[decembergirl1216]

I am so sorry. That really stinks to lose someone you have built a relationship with and trust. I hope you are able to find a good replacement.

[tiamiaxx]

Oh no I'm so sorry. That must be so hard. I hope you find someone amazing for your last baby

[jekasi]

I'm sorry you're going through this, it sounds like you had a really great relationship with him. Maybe there is someone he can recommend to you that he knows?

[slamar3]

T&P! I am very sorry you are going through this

[sutavim2]

I'm so sorry. I understand how important he is to you and your family.
As tough as it is, I also recommend you asking him for a referral. This way, you can make sure he approves your new OB. Perhaps this referral would give you more confidence and lighten the change.
Sending good thoughts your way!

[Deleted]

I'm so sorry, that must be so hard for you. Hopefully he can recommend someone equally wonderful and you get start building a relationship with them like you had with him. Hugs.

[gamergirl360]

So sorry to hear you're going through this, T&P for you! Hoping he can refer you to another great OB.

[akmom]

I'm so sorry this has happened to you. It sounds like he has been an amazing doctor. It's easy to get attached to someone who has played such an important role in your family. I'm pregnant with my 4th, and the midwife who delivered my other three is now retired. I'm really sad that I will not have her there this time. I feel like she knows my history, and I was completely comfortable with her.

[lindylogana]

I am so sorry you're losing such a great doctor. I hope he has some great recommendations for you!

[caymarks]

That's no good! Maybe you'll find someone else you are super comfortable with and can transition fairly easily.

[andindria]

I definitely agree to see if he can recommend anyone. He will more than likely hook you up with a good one. I'm sorry you are going through this. My favorite midwife took a new position 2 weeks before I found out I was pregnant. I was totally upset but happy for her too. Hopefully you will find someone that will treat you as good as this man will because he sounds totally awesome.

[junebug0611]

I am so sorry. I can kind of imagine how you must feel. If my husband's oncologist were to move or retire we'd be devastated. Once you've walked through life and death situations with someone, and they've helped carry you through, you really come to depend on and love them. We send our family Christmas letter to him -- which would seem weird but he is kind of the reason we still have a family to write a letter about so we feel close to him!

I am sure your OB will have a great rec for you and you will still have a great pregnancy and birth experience but your feelings are totally justified. ((Big hugs))

[maritimemama3]

Ugh, that really sucks. I'm sorry you're dealing with this. Is he retiring? Like PPs said, I'm sure he'll have a recommendation for you.

[360blessings]

Thanks you guys. Unfortunately his primary back up and who he will refer most of his patients to I had a horrible experience with when my son was stillborn. There is another person he will recommend for me and whose information they will give me at my appointment on Tuesday. And I work in the medical community and have lots of connections. There is a group that is well recommended and has been involved with the perinatal bereavement program that we have been a part of and is closer to home. I just don't want to change. Wish he could just come be my "coach" or whatever during labor. I'm just afraid and don't want to do this without him.
Wish this was just a bad dream. Didn't get much sleep last night and I know my blood pressure is up, but trying to make it through the day as its my 3 year olds birthday.

[cgiles120812]

I am so sorry that really sucks, I hope things turn around for you

[migdaliarose]

That really sucks, and I can understand why you would be so devastated after all that you've gone through together. I bet the next OB you get won't come close, but I hope that you are able to find a supportive practitioner that you feel comfortable with for your last birth. Good luck

****Siggy Warning****

[julzz81]

I'm so sorry your going through this, changing Dr you really like at anytime is hard but in the middle of pregnancy so much worse. I hope you find someone that works for you!

[poggipuss]

I'm so sorry, that's a really tough situation. I hope that you find another dr that you can connect with!

[wineandwalter]

So sorry!

[laylamamma2013]

So sorry you are dealing with this, finding an ob you trust is so hard.

[cch24]

So sorry you are dealing with this. I just had to switch OBs as well after 6 years but we were not that close and even I was upset knowing I'll just be another new patient somewhere else. FX he can refer you to an OB that is just as awesome.

[cookiesandwine]

Oh that sucks. I can't imagine how hard that must be with all your history with him. I would definitely ask if he can recommend someone and maybe even meet with all of you together to smooth the transition.

[hormonesavage]

I'm so sorry to hear that! It can definitely be an emotional thing having to switch your OB, especially when you guys have obviously been through a lot with them. I know you will be able to find an amazing new OB, when the time comes. They may not be your current OB, but you can form a new relationship with them during the remainder of your pregnancy! There are truly some amazing OB doctors out there that will make you feel comfortable, who are excellent at their jobs, and will welcome you into their practice as more than just another patient. T&P to you and your family for the future!

[jessijean]

I can't imagine how you feel with that many years of struggles that he has helped you through. I was devastated when I was told my past OB wasn't practicining OB side anymore and she had only helped me through one miscarriage. I hope you find one that you like.

[forevergraceful]

I am so sorry that this is happening. I hope he can offer a great recommendation for a new OB for you.

[360blessings]

Thanks everyone. Still having a hard time coming to terms with this but after talking to some friends and my nurse again I'm feeling slightly more at peace (for the moment). This is really going to suck going through this without him.