Weekly All-CAR check-in 4/23/2017
Apr 25, 2017 11:58:45 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Apr 25, 2017 11:58:45 GMT -5
therealbug, thinking of you, especially today, as this is appointment day for you, right? Hoping for good cervix and baby news.
ldubhawksfan, @jj32, I feel you ladies. I also don't feel terribly connected to this pregnancy yet and I try to live completely in the moment for now, as it was too painful to remember "oh I thought I'd have a baby now, but I don't." Today I'm pregnant, and I'm happy about it, but I'm not ready to plan too much yet.
addymac, I understand so much where you are. I still feel twinges like that years later when people ask if my daughter is my only. I tend to be upfront with people, and it's easier now that I'm able to talk about it without being as emotional - I think so many families go through pregnancy loss and so many don't talk about it, so I try to be someone that does. My shorter answer when pregnant was "this is my third pregnancy but will be our first living child" and leave it at that. I also thought the comparisons got lesser with time - I don't keep thinking "I would be here by now" and I'm very present in the moment with L. There are times though - I'll see photos of babies born when our first should have been born and think, that's how old he/she would be by now. I think of my losses pretty often, but it's not as painful anymore because I'm no longer mourning both the baby AND parenthood.
TL;DR - you're totally normal and I'm sorry it's so hard right now.
ldubhawksfan, @jj32, I feel you ladies. I also don't feel terribly connected to this pregnancy yet and I try to live completely in the moment for now, as it was too painful to remember "oh I thought I'd have a baby now, but I don't." Today I'm pregnant, and I'm happy about it, but I'm not ready to plan too much yet.
addymac, I understand so much where you are. I still feel twinges like that years later when people ask if my daughter is my only. I tend to be upfront with people, and it's easier now that I'm able to talk about it without being as emotional - I think so many families go through pregnancy loss and so many don't talk about it, so I try to be someone that does. My shorter answer when pregnant was "this is my third pregnancy but will be our first living child" and leave it at that. I also thought the comparisons got lesser with time - I don't keep thinking "I would be here by now" and I'm very present in the moment with L. There are times though - I'll see photos of babies born when our first should have been born and think, that's how old he/she would be by now. I think of my losses pretty often, but it's not as painful anymore because I'm no longer mourning both the baby AND parenthood.
TL;DR - you're totally normal and I'm sorry it's so hard right now.