erinshelley21 I can't wait for 2x per night to be a lot for me..right now it's "only twice"! And technically 3x because it has been around 1am and 4am then around 6am which is not children wake up time yet (dd1 gets up at 7 and I need the hour before to get the house & myself ready for the day) so I'm currently feeding again to try to get another hour.
I'm pet sitting my neighbor's dog today through next Tuesday. She's a sweet old Pug so it's easy but packing up both kids to do so isn't. They are so appreciative whenever I watch her though, I don't have the heart to say no. Plus she (the dog) is very very old and I know I likely don't have many more times to watch her.
Post by ladytiffany24 on May 11, 2017 5:39:53 GMT -5
I'm awake. B was up to eat at 5:45. I tried to go back to sleep but it's not happening. So here I lay, awake, waiting for the toddler to wake up, which is usually around 7am.
Does this seem normal or okay for a 5 week old? Maybe he's not getting enough during nursing sessions? Maybe it's a growth spurt? Maybe it's completely normal?
The night before last he gave me a 4 hour stretch, so I know it's possible but damn. At least he's been relatively easy to put down after these night sessions. Each of my nursing sessions is 5-10 minutes long, but I have oversupply and forceful let down so I wonder if he just chugs his milk and fills up quick.
10:15 - nurse & sleep 11:45 - nurse and sleep 1:45 - nurse, diaper, swaddle & sleep 3:00 - nurse 4:25 - nurse, diaper, down to sleep by 4:40 6:15 - nurse and up for the day.
kaits8 I want a pic of that pug! Though I understand you probably can't because it's someone else's and it's the internetz. I love me some smooshed faces though.
Post by kristhegirl on May 11, 2017 6:20:35 GMT -5
mosdub what do day feeds/sleeps look like? When he wakes up are you waiting for him to cry, or getting him up because he's making noise? What are you doing to bring down your over supply, if anything? What's the sleep environment situation?
I would think he should start sleeping for at least 2-3 hour chunks soon. Week 7 is when Max started stretching his sleep, though he was doing slightly longer stretches than you're getting already.
So. Make sure baby sleeping environment is dark, cool, and has loud white noise. Make sure baby is actually really and truly all the way awake and not just making noise while transitioning between sleep cycles. Most importantly: sleep as much as YOU can, during the day - chores, outings, etc can wait sometimes. You're still recovering from birth! Rest as much as you can, really. Especially with your night sleep being broken up so much.
Post by kristhegirl on May 11, 2017 6:25:00 GMT -5
mosdub also!!! All night sleeps go diaper first, then nurse, then lay down. Why wake up your baby to change their diaper right after feeding them? Feeding to sleep is natural. Don't worry about "bad habits," your baby is too young for that.
Swaddle all night, too. I missed that part. I do this: diaper, re-swaddle, nurse, lay baby down. If you're worried about intake, you could do the re-swaddle in the middle of nursing, just do it quickly and continue feeding.
I'm here. Kind of crabby. The dog had his teeth cleaned on Tuesday, and has had diarrhea since (from the anesthesia, I think?) So he needed to go out like every hour. The baby slept normally- 2 four hour stretches, but she took a long time to eat. She normally finishes her bottle in 20 min., and last night it took 45 min for both. I think her tummy is hurting her a little. 😞
I'm pumping, H (was) still in bed, and the dog needed to go out. He's good and just really goes to the bathroom, and runs back in. This morning though 2 giant dogs in his same breed walked by, so he went nuts. There I am at the front door, bottles on my boobs screaming at the dog to come in and my husband to wake up and go get him. So embarrassing. By the time my husband made it out, the dog was walking towards the front door on his own.
H also decided that last night was the night he was too exhausted from work to handle any feedings or diaper changes. Now, he is "watching the baby" who is fed, dry and in a new clean outfit so I can write some of my brief. You know, before he heads to his quiet office to finish the brief he needs to write.
Which leads me to my next point..WHY is my work assigning me stuff while I'm out?! I'm back to my unpaid weeks. Im getting the impression they think taking 12 weeks was a little excessive. I ran into my bosses in the downtown area of our town while I was walking the baby. My male boss said I "looked relaxed" and "well enough to return to work." It was so awkward.
kristhegirl, you're always such a wealth of info and help! I'll admit in my sleepiness I've screwed up the diaper/feed order. As for nursing to sleep - I'm so not worried about making bad habits yet - let's just get some solid chunks of sleep plz. I usually try to calm him when he fusses and makes noise at night by putting pressure on him (he's swaddled at night but sometimes applying a little pressure to his arms calms him) and putting in his paci. If he continues to fuss and spits out his paci repeatedly I check for rooting and if he roots then I nurse. If I have forceful let down I'll just let my boob spray into a burp cloth for a short bit before letting him back on. Either my supply is chilling out finally or he's getting better at guzzling because it's been less of an issue. He still sometimes gets angry after a feeding instead of tired because he swallows so much air. Last night he didn't get angry which was nice because he fell asleep easily after each session. I've been using white noise, but I could probably amp up the volume. I also have a dim lamp right by his bassinet. I've been leaving it on because when we first brought him home I was on edge and wanted to see him clearly MOTN to make sure he was breathing, etc, but now that I think about it it's probably more bright than it needs to be. I'll look into a replacement that is darker.
Yesterday he fed pretty much every 90-120 minutes during the day. Maybe I'll bring it up to the pediatrician since we see her tomorrow.
glb30, you should definitely not be unpaid if your work is assigning you stuff and expecting you to do it. That's some asshattery right there. Also, you "looking relaxed" has nothing to do with it - it's about recovering AND bonding with your baby. I'm pissed for you. I don't know if you feel ballsy enough to ask, but I think you should clarify that if you're on unpaid leave that you will not be working. If you are, then it shouldn't be unpaid.
Post by kristhegirl on May 11, 2017 7:12:18 GMT -5
mosdub it's all within normal boundaries and 5 weeks is really young for sleep regulation - it's just, you know, the longest five weeks of your life!
I know it's hard but try turning off the light entirely. Stash a flashlight if you want to peek at him. White noise should be loud enough that you can hear it through a closed door, and should be near head level.
Post by kristhegirl on May 11, 2017 7:14:34 GMT -5
glb30 do not work for free. That is a huge FLSA violation. Turn everything back over, turn off your work email, do not take work calls, etc etc etc. They need to pay you for the work you've done and if they don't you can chat with the DOL about your company "suffering or permitting" you to work without pay.
glb30 yeah, tell work they need to back off. Them assigning you stuff is a little ballsy, and the comment about looking relaxed is unbelievable. You aren't on vacation, you're caring for a baby.
C has slept really well the last two nights. His morning wake-up time had been a little later as well. My only complaint is that his wake up is usually between 4 and 5, and h gets up shortly after, so my sleep pre-wake-up is often awesome, but after is a little choppy. But if we can continue with once a night wakeups, than I'm not even mad about it!
My in-laws are making hints to h they want to come up. (They haven't seen C since Easter.) Weekends the next 2-3 weeks we have stuff going on, and h started planting so he'll be working Saturday's for awhile. I don't mind if they come when H is at work, but on Easter, my mil was driving me crazy (Which she didn't normally do!) I don't know if it was hormones, exhaustion, or what. I'm worried she'll annoy me and h won't be here to run interference!
Post by erinshelley21 on May 11, 2017 8:01:14 GMT -5
glb30, I'm pissed at your work for you. I'm self-employed and in a commission based profession. I've told people that tried to have me do stuff (except for one since it would have amounted to about $400 in my pocket) that work was waiting until I went back to work. If they can't understand then its business I don't want. And I give zero fucks about the guy that works for me or my brother wanting me to come back. Thankfully they aren't assholes like your coworker but still. They are men, there is no way they understand. Even if they were women, no two PP experiences are alike. You can never truly know what someone else is going through.
mosdub as always kris gives amazing advice. Only thing I would try is seeing if you can get him to nurse a little longer. Maybe burp when he unlatches and then offer again. Maybe you can fill his belly up a little more?
I think my dad was right when he said the next time I will get to sleep is in 10 years.
This will get better! DS seemed to never sleep. He was allergic to sleep. But he slowly got better around 4 months and then every month after that was better and better.
Keep up with the sleep routine. That was when he's old enough he'll associate that stuff with sleep and your comforting him. I also found that when naps started to consolidate they became easier. 3 naps a day was better than when he needed 5 a day.
Post by ladytiffany24 on May 11, 2017 8:26:54 GMT -5
glb30, I'm with the others. DO NOT work without getting paid. I'm an HR professional and can tell you without certainty, they're violating a whole bunch of stuff. If they want you to work, and you agree to it, they have to pay you! Otherwise, tell them it will have to wait until you're back from leave. Also, I'm full of rage because of the comments from your male boss. no, just no.
glb30 +however many to F that! I'm mad for you too!
With my maternity leave being abnormal for my company (I'm the only part-time, from home employee), I'm supposed to be on 8 weeks of "kind of working", where I'm getting paid but not expected to always be available. Since the 8 week (after 4 weeks off completely) started I've felt like my boss expected me back fully. Yesterday I mentioned it on our weekly conference call "just to make sure we're on the same page of what's expected of me right now" and he admitted he completely forgot about it and was just relieved to have me back. So he said he will back off a bit and told me to "just do what feels right" work-wise. Basically, he trusts me to use my judgement and get important stuff done as needed, which is a huge relief. So now I don't feel guilty about taking the girls to story time in the middle of what would be my working hours normally. Yay to 6.5 more weeks of this!
glb30 wow seriously? Your boss can stfu with the whole "well enough" crap. You were not sick, you are taking care of your newborn and recovering. Geez.
And to top it off you're working for free now? That's ridiculous.
I've touched base with my new boss because the other one left for another department. He said he hoped I was enjoying my leave. That's all your boss should have said aside from "how is baby?".
Post by seadragon2013 on May 11, 2017 10:46:34 GMT -5
mosdub I hope your LO starts stretching out their sleep for you. We cosleep with DD in the RNP and one trick we've learned is to use the night mode on the monitor instead of turning the lights on to check on her if she is fussing in the motn. She often fusses a bit with her eyes closed at the end of a sleep cycle before falling back into a deeper sleep.
glb30, that was seriously not cool of your boss. Taking care of a baby is exhausting in a different way than most other activities. And no pay = no work.
Post by seadragon2013 on May 11, 2017 10:50:50 GMT -5
We've had mother's day events at DS's preschools two days in a row (he goes to a private program in the mornings and a special ed program in the afternoon). I've worn DD in the ergo and she has been a rockstar, sleeping through both parties! Plus, when I wear her, I don't have to worry about all of the germy preschoolers poking and prodding her. 😉
Where are you guys putting the babies down for naps? I've just been letting her sleep on me or putting her in the swing or rnp in the living room while I'm in here.
I can't remember when I started putting dd1 down in another room.
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