BFP# 1 7/7/12 Beautiful DD born still at 36 weeks 5 days on 3/2/13 BFP #2 8/7/14 Rainbow DS born 4/2/15 Started adoption process July 2016 BF#3 8/29/16 DD2 born 4/21/17
5 years TTC 2 c/p's 2 failed IUIs/1 cancelled IVF 1 failed IVF 1 failed FET BFP 12/1/15. We said goodbye to Tiny 1/4/16 Fresh cycle #3 2/16 8R/7M/5F BFP 5/12/16 We said goodbye to flutter on 5/27 and poprock on 5/28 BFP 8/30/16 We said goodbye to Samuel 10/3 (Trisomy 16) Moving on to Donor Embryos BFP 12/20/16 We said goodbye to Turtle 12/30
I don't like it. I think it implies that you will have a "family", meaning children.
Respectfully replying- For the past 13 years without a child my husband and myself have been a beautiful and strong family. In June we will just be "adding" another member.
Respectfully, this is my opinion. I don't like the name choice. And my reasons, although you don't agree with them, are not wrong bc they aren't the popular opinion. It's how I feel and what I think of when I read it. I can see why some ppl are withholding their comments now. I wouldn't have posted if I had known I was going to be "called out" for not feel in the same way as others. That being said, the name of the board will not change how I feel about the support offered here. ETA- spelling
Last Edit: Feb 19, 2015 22:30:45 GMT -5 by mrswheelo
BFP: 7-22-14 EDD 4-7-15 US 8-21-14 revealed spontaneous twins New EDD 3-10-15 PTL due to IC-11-22-14 @ 21 weeks Loss date: Lydia 11-24-14 & Lane 11-25-14 BFP#2- 3/15/15 EDD- 11/26/15
I like it a lot for many of the reasons already shared regarding how "family" has such a broad definition, and this forum wants to welcome everyone to the table. Very thoughtful idea and name choice.
Post by ombradellarosa on Feb 19, 2015 23:46:26 GMT -5
I love the post that goes with this talking about the meaning behind the name and choosing to spend your life with someone meaning family. Like I learned years ago on Sesame Street, "family" has many definitions. I feel like that's accepted now more than ever. I think this is a wonderful and inclusive name. I also feel that anyone who doesn't agree should be allowed to share those feelings as well.
I've been thinking about it, the explanation to my first questions, and reading more of the responses and I'm still meh about it. I'm not sure there's a "better" option and I get that it checks off lots of boxes (availability, ease of use/saying, lots of branding opportunities, etc...) but it's still not doing it for me.
Of course, I'm not going anywhere either and there aren't many names that could have been selected that would have changed that, I just don't know if this has that wow factor for me.
Post by meerkatmillie on Feb 20, 2015 7:32:19 GMT -5
Im on board with this suggestion. I like that it can apply to so many situations (a person without a partner trying to get pregnant with egg/sperm donations, a person trying for first with DH, an unmarried couple skipping the marriage step, a person that already has 4 kids, teen moms, a person that is childless not by choice, etc). The implication that this board is a place to find a "family" is my favorite part.
I'm also not in love with the name. I like the meaning, I get it, but its not very 'catchy' and it's not wow-ing me. Clearly its a front running choice based on all the love going on here, but it feels a bit too... I don't know... boring I guess.
We aren't opposed to making a poll to be sure that people are overall happy. Let's give it a day or so for those who are willing to voice their feelings in this post and to see if there are any big issues that we haven't thought of.
Not to beat a dead horse. But... . I like to look at the math in things and this comes to mind and I thought id share.
The last name poll had 1200+ individual voters. That's a good segment of your posters weighing in well still only 17%if you have 7000 individuals here but thats probably a good representative sample. Polls are simple easy ways to get a fast answer when members don't have to type they can just click yes we like this name or no can we keep looking or other it's an ok name but something about it bothers me. Something like that.
If there are 30 posts a page on his thread and ignoring the admin or other duplicates at 10 pages that is only 300 mostly like votes for this name. That's only 4% of your posters (if you have 7000 members) which is less like votes than that little people name lol.
I'm just looking at the math and knowing board dynamics that if the post is mostly positive- only a few will wade in and say something negative unless they feel strongly about the topic enough to want to deal with the snark (real or perceived) that invariably comes back their way.
Just something to think about if you want your community to really be user lead.
The admins have a name proposal for your consideration and comment, please. We are not opposed to another poll, but we really like an option that was proposed during the last discussion. renbee proposed “Then Comes Family” by saying, “It speaks to the process of starting a family, but also I think a lot of us have found "family" on these boards." We agree, and let us explain.
As we mentioned in our vision statement, there exists in our society a set of expectations for our adult lives: first comes love, then comes marriage, and then, as the rhyme goes, comes the baby in the baby carriage. After that? The “happily ever after” complete with social-media worthy perfection.
In reality, the process is nowhere near that simple. Life is not what we are taught to expect, but the reality is that what happens next is family. Deciding to spend the rest of your life with someone is the beginning of becoming that family. The shared experiences, traditions, and memories create a family, no matter the eventual size or path you take to get there.
Many people still have fairytale expectations when they get married. Unfortunately, happily ever after rarely lasts long. Oftentimes disappointments, death, divorce, and too many other circumstances crumble the fairytale, and you face a new normal.
Then Comes Family allows our community to change and challenge those norms by accepting and embracing all family dynamics, exactly as they are.
We know what reality looks like—the over 140 boards in our forum illustrate just a few of the infinite descriptions for those family realities. In the search for inclusive language, we had to recognize that some couples may find that their family is finished with just the two of them, whether by choice or by circumstance, and what that conclusion means for them. After soliciting advice from members of that community, we think that Then Comes Family best reflects and respects the diversity of both the journeys and the outcomes for our community.
Now, we want to know what you think. We cleared it for our logistical concerns and did some other vetting.
Respectfully replying- For the past 13 years without a child my husband and myself have been a beautiful and strong family. In June we will just be "adding" another member.
Respectfully, this is my opinion. I don't like the name choice. And my reasons, although you don't agree with them, are not wrong bc they aren't the popular opinion. It's how I feel and what I think of when I read it. I can see why some ppl are withholding their comments now. I wouldn't have posted if I had known I was going to be "called out" for not feel in the same way as others. That being said, the name of the board will not change how I feel about the support offered here. ETA- spelling
I definitely wasn't calling you out. Reading your "opinion" is what prompted me to reply with mine. I definitely don't think what you said is wrong; it's how you feel. I thought quoting was the norm when responding to something in particular. My bad if I made you feel any type of way. I don't call people out, hence the "respectfully" I included with my reply for that reason.
Life doesn't discriminate between the sinners and the saints, it takes and it takes and it takes. But we keep living anyway, we rise and we fall and we break and we make our mistakes.
Then Comes Family, LLC is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising
program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com.