Post by jennyinheaven on May 17, 2017 17:46:53 GMT -5
Clueless only time mom here. Is DD old enough to understand simple consequences? Tonight for example, DD was out playing with neighbor kids while DH sat outside and watched. I cooked dinner and called them in. DD didn't want to come in, ran from DH etc. When she finally listened DH says to her that he would give her another chance if she could sit and eat a nice dinner she could go back out for a little after eating. Well dinner was a shit show of her playing with food, making messes, not eating and general goofiness on her part. After several warnings I said that's it you are done you can't go out again today but you can try again tomorrow. Cue the complete meltdown, so it would be easier for me to give in but I'm thinking that's not good parenting. But then I'm second guessing myself and wondering if I'm expecting to much at her age. What does M14 think?
Yes, immediate consequences are good at this age. Taking away playtime tomorrow as consequence for today may not get the message across, but the "because you just did this, you can't do this now" is age appropriate. Of course she's going to be mad about it, but they're old enough to learn now that inappropriate behavior and not listening results in undesirable outcomes. Our biggest battles are usually bedtime related and I threaten and take away the fun parts if she's not cooperative.
Immediate consequences like comicSans says they understand. I would have / have done the exact same thing you did. You just have to deal with the meltdown and when she is calm enough talk to her about why she can't do what she wants
Post by jennyinheaven on May 17, 2017 18:08:37 GMT -5
Thanks M14 for the back up. I usually parent mostly by instinct and I feel like she is capable of good eating habits and listening so my gut said stick to your guns. But there is always a little voice of doubt especially when they are screaming and melting down. 3 year old s are so fun
Yeah we do it too. If she doesn't clean up her toys no story at bedtime. My mom was babysitting last week and immediately after mom told her she lost her story she went to "I cean up now."
Absolutely don't give in or go back on your word. If it's a no, it's a no. You can think of a more immediate consequence and go with that next time. I think it's always good to follow through even if it wasn't a greatish idea to begin with. I mean what I say is something my kid can get at this age.
Post by jennyinheaven on May 19, 2017 5:14:03 GMT -5
Update after the previous evenings shenanigans that finally resulted in her being put to bed hysterical and crying herself to sleep. Last night her behavior improved immensly for dinner and bedtime routines
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