What am I doing with all that salt?

[MapleMe]

The cheapest place for me to buy salt for my hot sauce is still my neighborhood grocery store. It's annoying because 1) I'm buying 50+ lbs of salt at a time and would rather buy 100+ and just have it delivered like everything else and 2) because I inevitably get ask what I'm making with all that salt. I answer "hot sauce" and then they are confused and I have to explain that I own a hot sauce business and they ask me which one which leads to me having to explain that it's actually a bakery that makes hot sauce and then they are more confused and it is all very annoying. So, what can I tell them that I'm doing with all that salt? Preferably something that won't make them think that I'm a murderer or seriously creepy.

[grumpycakes]

May 17, 2017 19:40:18 GMT -5 MapleMe said:

The cheapest place for me to buy salt for my hot sauce is still my neighborhood grocery store. It's annoying because 1) I'm buying 50+ lbs of salt at a time and would rather buy 100+ and just have it delivered like everything else and 2) because I inevitably get ask what I'm making with all that salt. I answer "hot sauce" and then they are confused and I have to explain that I own a hot sauce business and they ask me which one which leads to me having to explain that it's actually a bakery that makes hot sauce and then they are more confused and it is all very annoying. So, what can I tell them that I'm doing with all that salt? Preferably something that won't make them think that I'm a murderer or seriously creepy.

Seriously? Your wholesaler doesn't sell salt cheaper?

[grumpycakes]

Also, I would just pay more for the salt. Worth it to get it delivered and avoid curious cashiers. Lol.

[Stringy]

Or just make up some creepy murderer story.

"Salt gets the blood stains out"

[TJ]

Three words: swimming pool margarita.

[MapleMe]

May 17, 2017 19:43:07 GMT -5 grumpycakes said:

May 17, 2017 19:40:18 GMT -5 MapleMe said:

The cheapest place for me to buy salt for my hot sauce is still my neighborhood grocery store. It's annoying because 1) I'm buying 50+ lbs of salt at a time and would rather buy 100+ and just have it delivered like everything else and 2) because I inevitably get ask what I'm making with all that salt. I answer "hot sauce" and then they are confused and I have to explain that I own a hot sauce business and they ask me which one which leads to me having to explain that it's actually a bakery that makes hot sauce and then they are more confused and it is all very annoying. So, what can I tell them that I'm doing with all that salt? Preferably something that won't make them think that I'm a murderer or seriously creepy.

Seriously? Your wholesaler doesn't sell salt cheaper?

Nope. I use Diamond kosher and neither of my distributors sell it at all (my options are iodized or sea salt). It costs me $2.49/3lb box at Shaws, 4ish/box at my local coop and anywhere from $3.50 to $8 per box online (including shipping). I would have to sign on with a different distributor to get it wholesale and they don't have the other things that I buy.

[MapleMe]

Tonight's cashier was actually friendly about it. I was also buying a lot of beer (I also have to buy that at retail since VT doesn't have a liquor license that pertains to my use of it). So he said, "I see your strategy here! Eat the salt, get thirsty, then drink the beer."

[brandiewine11]

Give them a business card when they ask?

Our dog Maggie used to eat canned salmon. It was the only decent protein source she wasn't allergic to. She ate 2 large cans a day. I could get it cheapest at Trader Joe's so every 2 weeks I'd go buy 2 cases. I got lots of questions about that too....

[brandiewine11]

I had another idea. You should make itty bitty sample bottles and hand them out. Like those tiny bottles of Tabasco sauce. Adorable and functional. And I could carry them in my purse for use away from home.

[MapleMe]

May 18, 2017 6:31:06 GMT -5 brandiewine11 said:

I had another idea. You should make itty bitty sample bottles and hand them out. Like those tiny bottles of Tabasco sauce. Adorable and functional. And I could carry them in my purse for use away from home.

I've thought about that, but unfortunately tiny bottles are stupid expensive compared to their perceived value. Both because of the cost of the glass and the bottling time. It really is only huge companies that can make them cost effective.

[brandiewine11]

May 18, 2017 6:54:37 GMT -5 MapleMe said:

May 18, 2017 6:31:06 GMT -5 brandiewine11 said:

I had another idea. You should make itty bitty sample bottles and hand them out. Like those tiny bottles of Tabasco sauce. Adorable and functional. And I could carry them in my purse for use away from home.

I've thought about that, but unfortunately tiny bottles are stupid expensive compared to their perceived value. Both because of the cost of the glass and the bottling time. It really is only huge companies that can make them cost effective.

So I can have them in 5 or so years when you are super famous?

[dramaphile]

Or you're collecting it to use as road salt for next year? Or you're really into making salt-baked fish? Or you have a saltwater pool? Or you're using it to mummify your dead grandmother?

[DGM]

Do you use salt in anything else so you could just say "it's for my bakery"?

[dramaphile]

I feel like giving them a really ridiculous answer will shut them down immediately. Or like, "If I told you, I'd have to kill you" with a super straight face.

[MapleMe]

May 18, 2017 8:28:25 GMT -5 dramaphile said:

I feel like giving them a really ridiculous answer will shut them down immediately. Or like, "If I told you, I'd have to kill you" with a super straight face.

Every time I give a weird answer they get really confused and don't get the joke. I once told a person that I was buying tons of vinegar at Costco "for the leprosy." They just didn't know what to do with that.

[MapleMe]

May 18, 2017 8:20:46 GMT -5 DGM said:

Do you use salt in anything else so you could just say "it's for my bakery"?

I've done that and then they ask me what I'm making in a bakery that needs so much salt.

[MapleMe]

Maybe I should pretend that it's for philanthropic reasons.

"To help starving children in Africa"

"To make salt licks for malnourished parakeets"

"To save the whales"

"For the Trump impeachment"

[piccyami]

May 18, 2017 9:49:12 GMT -5 MapleMe said:

May 18, 2017 8:20:46 GMT -5 DGM said:

Do you use salt in anything else so you could just say "it's for my bakery"?

I've done that and then they ask me what I'm making in a bakery that needs so much salt.

Do they not understand the volume a bakery deals with?

[sarenu]

Just tell them you are completing your stock pile of dry goods for the inevitable downfall of society and that salt will be the new currency.

[MapleMe]

May 18, 2017 9:54:22 GMT -5 piccyami said:

May 18, 2017 9:49:12 GMT -5 MapleMe said:

I've done that and then they ask me what I'm making in a bakery that needs so much salt.

Do they not understand the volume a bakery deals with?

Actually no. It's amazing how many people do not understand this. I get comments like, "Wow, I see your stuff everywhere! You must be baking 24/7!" I want to be all, "Well it is my job. I'm not doing this as a fun little side gig after I finish 40 hours for someone else. And I do have commercial baking equipment. I'm not doing this in a home oven." 

But even if they do get it, they then don't understand why I'm not buying the salt from my distributor to which I want to say, "I WANT TO!!!"

[piccyami]

May 18, 2017 9:58:48 GMT -5 MapleMe said:

May 18, 2017 9:54:22 GMT -5 piccyami said:

Do they not understand the volume a bakery deals with?

Actually no. It's amazing how many people do not understand this. I get comments like, "Wow, I see your stuff everywhere! You must be baking 24/7!" I want to be all, "Well it is my job. I'm not doing this as a fun little side gig after I finish 40 hours for someone else. And I do have commercial baking equipment. I'm not doing this in a home oven." 

But even if they do get it, they then don't understand why I'm not buying the salt from my distributor to which I want to say, "I WANT TO!!!"

I just don't understand people.

[ovenrack]

"I'M BUILDING AN OCEAN."

[ovenrack]

But so far, my favorite is definitely "it's for the Trump impeachment."

[rugger]

You should just tell them you really like salt

[pbandj714]

Salt? I put that shit on everything.

[MapleMe]

May 18, 2017 10:10:36 GMT -5 piccyami said:

May 18, 2017 9:58:48 GMT -5 MapleMe said:

Actually no. It's amazing how many people do not understand this. I get comments like, "Wow, I see your stuff everywhere! You must be baking 24/7!" I want to be all, "Well it is my job. I'm not doing this as a fun little side gig after I finish 40 hours for someone else. And I do have commercial baking equipment. I'm not doing this in a home oven." 

But even if they do get it, they then don't understand why I'm not buying the salt from my distributor to which I want to say, "I WANT TO!!!"

I just don't understand people.

Omg. People. I mean, I love people, but oy, everyone has moments. Like the lady who picked up my salad dressing sample cup at the farmers market and walked away sipping on it...

[piccyami]

May 18, 2017 12:13:53 GMT -5 MapleMe said:

May 18, 2017 10:10:36 GMT -5 piccyami said:

I just don't understand people.

Omg. People. I mean, I love people, but oy, everyone has moments. Like the lady who picked up my salad dressing sample cup at the farmers market and walked away sipping on it...

...

There's definitely a reason why I don't work with the public. That right there definitely confirms it. I don't understand people. I understand computers.