Stepparent Adoption

[CurlieWhirlie]

I don't have any specific advice, but check to see if there's a free family law help clinic at your local courthouse. I was able to do my divorce for free on my own using their help. Like you said, if it's not contentious and it's just filling out paperwork, you just need a little guidance on the right papers to file.

Good luck! I'm glad to hear no one is fighting, that's nice.

[kcones88]

We are also looking into this in the near future, but haven't started the process yet. From what I can tell on the county website, it's a relatively simple process, especially when the other birth parent doesn't contest. Good luck and let us know how it goes!

[mrspiatt]

DH adopted my daughter last year. XH agreed to it. I'm not sure if there is a difference in the forms based on states, I'm in California. There was a 2 page form we filled out and XH just had to sign it and it was notarized. It was about 5 months later that the adoption was finalized, but his part was done.
I'm happy for you that your kids are young. DD was 15 when her dad decided he didn't want to be her dad anymore. She and DH already had a great relationship, but it definitely messed with her.

[mrspiatt]

Mar 20, 2015 16:56:23 GMT -5 @littlefoote said:

Mar 20, 2015 11:42:36 GMT -5 mrspiatt said:

DH adopted my daughter last year. XH agreed to it. I'm not sure if there is a difference in the forms based on states, I'm in California. There was a 2 page form we filled out and XH just had to sign it and it was notarized. It was about 5 months later that the adoption was finalized, but his part was done.
I'm happy for you that your kids are young. DD was 15 when her dad decided he didn't want to be her dad anymore. She and DH already had a great relationship, but it definitely messed with her.

Only liking for the fact that it was an easy process for you! I'm sorry to hear that your DD was a teenager when that happened. I can only imagine what that must have been like for her. I am grateful that my kids are so young!

I hope the process is easy for you too. I used prepaid legal services through my work to do it, the longest part of it was waiting for CPS to do their home visit and write their report. Maybe you can get your Ex to sign his stuff now, so you can tell him he's done. I wish you luck and I hope the process is a speedy one for you!

[mrspiatt]

@littlefoote because it was uncontested I didn't have to serve him anything. I just met him at the notary had him sign the form, get it notarized, I made a copy for his records and that was that.

[mrspiatt]

Mar 21, 2015 9:57:07 GMT -5 @littlefoote said:

Mar 20, 2015 19:55:00 GMT -5 mrspiatt said:

@littlefoote because it was uncontested I didn't have to serve him anything. I just met him at the notary had him sign the form, get it notarized, I made a copy for his records and that was that.

Interesting. I'll have to find out if I could do it that way, too, because my ex is more than willing to get this done. He lives over seven hours away, though, so I don't care to meet him anywhere.

I'm sure you can mail the paperwork. I had to meet my ex, because he wouldn't have taken the time to mail anything back to me or pay the $5 o get it notarized.

[kcones88]

I hope that there's some kind of recourse for when the birth parent is unreachable. DD's dad moved out of the country 3 years ago and has made no attempt to contact us since then. I have no clue how to reach him so getting him to sign a document or get something notarized will be next to impossible. Hopefully there's a way around it for us.

[mrspiatt]

Mar 23, 2015 11:10:09 GMT -5 kcones88 said:

I hope that there's some kind of recourse for when the birth parent is unreachable. DD's dad moved out of the country 3 years ago and has made no attempt to contact us since then. I have no clue how to reach him so getting him to sign a document or get something notarized will be next to impossible. Hopefully there's a way around it for us.

I believe the court can terminate his rights with out consent, but there is a process and it'll probably vary state to state. I remember reading about when I was looking into the step parent adoption, even though it didn't apply to our situation, it was part of the information provided to us.
We were fortunate to have a prepaid legal plan through my work and it covered the lawyer for the adoption. We could have figured it out on our own, but it may have taken a bit longer to do.

[beeps]

Mar 23, 2015 12:17:40 GMT -5 mrspiatt said:

Mar 23, 2015 11:10:09 GMT -5 kcones88 said:

I hope that there's some kind of recourse for when the birth parent is unreachable. DD's dad moved out of the country 3 years ago and has made no attempt to contact us since then. I have no clue how to reach him so getting him to sign a document or get something notarized will be next to impossible. Hopefully there's a way around it for us.

I believe the court can terminate his rights with out consent, but there is a process and it'll probably vary state to state. I remember reading about when I was looking into the step parent adoption, even though it didn't apply to our situation, it was part of the information provided to us.
We were fortunate to have a prepaid legal plan through my work and it covered the lawyer for the adoption. We could have figured it out on our own, but it may have taken a bit longer to do.

PP is correct. The court *can* terminate without his consent. We adopted my granddaughters so DSHS/CPS took care of all the legalities. They were able to locate the bio-dads. Their older brother was adopted as a baby and the putative bio-father signed his rights with a "not the father" disclaimer.   When I was working in an attorney's office, we had "notify by publication" where you can publish in your local paper and in the paper of the town where your DD's dad was last known to live, or other similar method of notification.  Once you can show that you did what you could to find the father (we notified by publication, hired an investigator and did a couple other things) the judge will be able to acknowledge the father is out of the picture and terminate by order or decree.