Diaper raffle- yay or nay?

[tashala107]

We're invited to a co-ed, Friday evening, second baby shower at the end of the month. Included in the invite was a ticket for a diaper raffle- bring a pack of diapers, get a raffle ticket for a prize.

I've never heard of that before. I don't entirely hate the idea, but at the same time it feels odd to have a raffle at a baby shower. Thoughts? Opinions?

[bkml]

Do it. I was at a baby shower a while back and I won the prize. A basket full of goodies. I went to rite aid and got which ever diapers were on sale. Totally worth the 10 bucks.

Might throw this idea to my sister. She loves these fun raffle ideas.

[fortunecookie2014]

I don't understand - you're supposed to bring a present *plus* diapers? Yea, no. I'll decide what I get for the mom, thank you.

[bkml]

Jan 18, 2015 21:39:31 GMT -5 fortunecookie2014 said:

I don't understand - you're supposed to bring a present *plus* diapers? Yea, no. I'll decide what I get for the mom, thank you.

You don't HAVE to.  Its like the new version of the wishing well.

[flashy]

I kinda think it's tacky to include that in the invite. Obviously if you are invited to a shower, it's the norm to bring a gift, but to be expected to bring a gift and diapers, it's rude. I know it's optional, but I don't like it.

[tashala107]

Jan 18, 2015 21:39:31 GMT -5 fortunecookie2014 said:

I don't understand - you're supposed to bring a present *plus* diapers? Yea, no. I'll decide what I get for the mom, thank you.

Yea, I think it's a suggested add on. Friends who are throwing my shower will also be there. I want to feel out the tacky-meter so I can give them feedback for my shower

[bkml]

Jan 18, 2015 21:53:01 GMT -5 @feegan said:

My cousin had a diaper raffle on top of the normal gifts, I didn't really understand the whole concept so I bought a huge pack of diapers, spending a sizable chunk of what I'd normally put towards the gift on it. Well of course I arrive and everyone else had cheaped out buying bargain diapers and of course she didn't keep track of who participated or not. I felt a little cheated by the whole thing not totally understanding it and then I couldn't stop thinking about what a terrible idea it is to have people pick any old diaper to bring. What if your kid can't wear any of the diapers?

Donate them.

[jr310]

My mom was going to do this for my shower. I think wording is key. "If you'd like to participate in the diaper raffle please bring a *small* package of diapers and this ticket!

If I were invited and it included a raffle, I would spend 20 bucks less on the gift and incorporate the diapers into that. I'd rather get diapers than SO MANY ONESIES anyway lol

[bookitup]

I wouldn't have an issue with it, but I would also buy a small pack of diapers. I think things like this are fun if handled right and not gift grabby.

[kissandglow]

I know it always says that you don't have to participate, but I was at a shower where I didn't apparently get the memo, and the host straight up asked when I handed her my gift, "did you bring diapers also?" Uh, no, but thanks for making me feel like an idiot, and that my gift wasn't good enough.

My MIL apparently asked the guests at my party to do this, and there was someone who literally just brought diapers because she thought that was the point. Of course, I didn't mind but my host took all the diapers and placed them in a separate corner, so I never got to formally thank her for her gift while I opened everyone else's gift. And frankly nobody got acknowledged for the diapers they brought because they were a part of the raffle.

I think this is just another new thing that comes across gift grabby, so I'm on the NAY side.

[steen9713]

My sister and aunt are throwing my shower, they are doing this for mine. More so because I have twins and need to stock pile on diapers. But they are planning on some awesome raffle gifts. But they are asking for small packs. I've done this for others in the past. And I've seen some really good raffles. Dinner and a movie. Starbucks GC. And I won a Macy's GC I think it was $25. But it all depends on you I normally participate. I buy a small pack of diapers that's on sale and then a gift ( (normally I give home made quilts) so I don't wver feel bad about spending them $$ on diapers. Participate if you want I don't think any one would be offended if you didn't. If they are then they missed then they shouldn't have asked it to be optional.

[junebug0611]

I've never been to a shower where they did this. Having read and thought about the responses I'm against the idea. The thought of people feeling obligated to participate, then bringing cheapie diapers the mom won't even want to use, not getting acknowledged for the gift... not adding up to a good scene.

That said, if I was attending a shower where they were doing this, I'd participate so as not to appear rude or a spoilsport. I'd bring a small pack of diapers I would actually use and attach a gift tag or stuff an encouraging note into the pack for the mom to find when she goes to use them. And I'd reduce what I spend on my real gift accordingly because I am on a budget.

[junebug0611]

Jan 19, 2015 7:06:44 GMT -5 kissandglow said:

I know it always says that you don't have to participate, but I was at a shower where I didn't apparently get the memo, and the host straight up asked when I handed her my gift, "did you bring diapers also?" Uh, no, but thanks for making me feel like an idiot, and that my gift wasn't good enough.

My MIL apparently asked the guests at my party to do this, and there was someone who literally just brought diapers because she thought that was the point. Of course, I didn't mind but my host took all the diapers and placed them in a separate corner, so I never got to formally thank her for her gift while I opened everyone else's gift. And frankly nobody got acknowledged for the diapers they brought because they were a part of the raffle.

I think this is just another new thing that comes across gift grabby, so I'm on the NAY side.

Maybe if people are going to do this they should ask guests to attach a gift tag to the diapers so the mom can acknowledge them with a thank you note at least. And that might also dissuade the gifting of crappy diapers no one would want to use.

[tashala107]

Thanks for all the input, ladies! I haven't bought a gift yet, so I'll factor the diapers in. Based on your feedback, I'll suggest to my friends that I wouldn't want this at my shower.

[andindria]

I have been to showers, I've never been to an actual diaper raffle. I would think that present brought would be enough. I personally am on a tight budget when it comes to gifts for others (with the exception of direct family).I don't like the idea of having to add more into the budget, so I'll lower the initial gift price and incorporate it that way.

But I have seen dad showers where the men were supposed to bring diapers as an entry way to the shower. My personal opinion was I completely eye it as gift grabby and rude. Hubby never got a thank you card or anything and he brought a $35 dollar pack of diapers. When you are just instructed to throw them on the table with the other diapers there is an issue. They really don't care about who brought what, only what they will have in the end. I found that I got enough diapers for DS's first six to seven months with diapers just from the diaper cakes that were made for my shower and the ones I got for the shower.

[babymcdonnell]

I've never been to a baby shower at all, but after reading these responses I definitely wouldn't want to add a diaper raffle on top of expecting other gifts. I'm already apprehensive about having a baby shower because I feel weird having people buy us stuff other than our close family. It's probably just because I've never been to one and am not used to the idea, but I just feel bad registering for anything above $20 or $30.

[lindylogana]

I've been to baby showers where there were diaper raffles. They're fun and a small pack is only an extra $10. I think they're a great idea to help mom and dad stock up.

[queenofcats]

I'm not sure how I feel. Sure it's a nice idea, but the thought of putting something in an invitation about it would make someone feel obligated. What if they can't afford the extra $10? Then they would feel embarrassed that they may be the only one not participating. I don't like the idea of telling people what to buy, if someone wants to buy you diapers they will. At most baby showers I've gone to they've still given out prizes for games and there was no obligation to buy anything extra.

[Deleted]

We were invited to a 3rd baby - baby shower for DH's cousin and the invite said if we brought a pack of XX count of a certain size/brand or larger we could drink free beer all night.

We didn't go.

Buy the $7 Target brand diapers and have fun.

[dabearsfanswife]

Ugh tacky tacky tacky. I would bring a small package with a gift receipt so she can return them easier but I would side eye the whole thing.

[slamar3]

It's considered one of the games. It's very common. I have never been to a baby shower that didn't have this. The last shower I went to I didn't have the money to buy so I didn't participate. There is no shaming if you don't bring diapers. It's just to help the parents with a little incentive

Eta: cause I just woke up and I'm not thinking straight

[catladymeow]

I've never been to a baby shower and I probably won't have one (my family/friends are very spread out and I don't really have anyone close nearby) but after reading this thread I think it would rub me the wrong way. I don't really "get" showers in general, and I would resent having to bring an extra gift. But I'm a curmudgeon.

[amycutzhair]

I have been to showers that included the diaper raffle. I alway participate with a small package free and clear, unbleached diapers. I personally will not be having a diaper raffle since I want to cloth diaper and feel its far to expensive to ask people to bring a $20 diaper on top of a gift.

[rachacre]

I could understand this as the men's "shower" as I know some do a diaper party for the guys. If the dad is feeding and supplying the booze for a few guys to bring some cheapy diapers, great! We didn't plan on dad doing a diaper party because this is my first (his second) and I will have a baby shower, but I'm sure our friends will throw him one anyway. I think the raffle is a fun idea for the dad's party.

[sutavim2]

You can always spend less on the main gift and get the diapers. They don't have to be expensive or a big package. Last time i hosted, we did that as one of the games and it was awarded the biggest prize- Victorias secret gift basket.

[akmom]

I've never been to a shower that has had a diaper raffle, but I have been to a number of second showers that are diaper showers. They are usually very simple events, often a girl's night out where everyone brings some diapers and wipes. Most people only bring diapers, and not another gift.

I think a diaper raffle would be okay if you aren't expected to bring much for another gift.

[yl]

Jan 19, 2015 8:47:01 GMT -5 @sldober0521 said:

We were invited to a 3rd baby - baby shower for DH's cousin and the invite said if we brought a pack of XX count of a certain size/brand or larger we could drink free beer all night.

We didn't go.

Buy the $7 Target brand diapers and have fun.

This invitation would go in the trash SO FAST. Would you have to PAY for the beer otherwise?! MY GOD.

[jlbaker08]

I went to a shower that included a raffle ticket for the diaper raffle. I just included the price of the diapers in the total amount I intended to spend on the gift. I'm also the kind of person that would bring diapers as part of the gift anyway, maybe it's because I already have one kid and I understand the value of a box of diapers versus the 600 onesies and outfits your kid will never get a chance to wear.
I say buy the $10 plastic bag pack of diapers at the store and take that out of what you would've spent on the gift.(be sure to make it a name brand or an obvious store brand so that they can be exchanged easily, nothing is more frustrating that realizing you have a bag of Food Lion brand diapers that you're trying to exchange at Walmart... I'm speaking from experience).

[tla0623]

In theory it doesn't sound like a bad idea; but I'd hate to make anyone feel singled out or bad at my baby shower, so I'd pass as well.

[andindria]

Jan 19, 2015 14:51:54 GMT -5 yl said:

Jan 19, 2015 8:47:01 GMT -5 @sldober0521 said:

We were invited to a 3rd baby - baby shower for DH's cousin and the invite said if we brought a pack of XX count of a certain size/brand or larger we could drink free beer all night.

We didn't go.

Buy the $7 Target brand diapers and have fun.

This invitation would go in the trash SO FAST. Would you have to PAY for the beer otherwise?! MY GOD.

What if you dont drink? Would they hold back the water or soda??