Intro/ dear diary

[babyzebra]

Well, I guess it is time for me to make my intro here. I found out that my pregnancy had come to an end this past Thursday. I went to the ER Thursday evening after starting to bleed on Wednesday. I got an ultrasound that showed no HB at 7 weeks of development when I should have been almost 10 weeks.

I've been pretty numb since I found out. I've cried, but more than that I just feel empty inside. DH has been feeling the same way I think. We ate dinner on Friday in complete silence. It's going to take some time to work through this, but we are both feeling a little better today.

Physically, I feel fine. I'm bleeding quite a bit (not emergency levels though) and have just minor cramping. I go on Monday to see my OB for a follow up ultrasound and exam and to talk about where we go from here. I'm going to have weekly blood draws until my beta levels are back to zero.

Sorry this is so long. It feels good just to get it all out though. I'm sorry that you all have to be here, but I am happy that there is a place where we can support each other.

[starfishy]

I'm sorry to hear about your loss. Mine is just as fresh as yours as it happened this week as well. I hope you find comfort and support on this board.

[shytimes]

I'm so sorry for your loss and hope you can get answers from your ob soon.

[mrssqueegy]

I'm so sorry for your loss. Thinking of you.

[nikolie93]

I'm sorry for your loss and your feelings are normal. I hate that anyone is here, but welcome. We all know and understand what you're going through and are here when you need us *hug*

[meredithcarole]

I'm very sorry for your loss.

[rablissful]

So sorry for your loss. It seems feeling numb is fairly common. Take care of yourself!

[snakefisherbub]

I am so sorry for your loss. I understand completely about feeling empty inside. I am a week out from my loss and I still feel that way. Big hugs for you.

[swivelchair5]

I'm sorry for your loss.

[chiapet]

I am so sorry for your loss. (hugs)

[followthesun]

Sorry for your loss, but welcome to the board. ((Hugs))

[amylev80]

I am so sorry for your loss. Hugs to you.

[Winnifred]

babyzebra, I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope that participating on this board can help bring peace and comfort to you.

[kcrkcs]

Sorry for your loss.

[amandaree]

I am so sorry you are going through this.

[vivela]

I'm so sorry for your loss and that you have to be here. I hope the board can help bring you comfort.

[zimni]

I am so sorry you have had to go through this.

Totally understand the feeling of numbness and emptiness - all very normal. As painful and dark it was, what helped me through was allowing myself to mourn and feel sad for as long as it took, before I could move on and start trying again. This board is extremely understanding and patient - I hope you find comfort here.

Take care.
<hugs>

[Ann612]

so sorry you find yourself here, but we are here to listen and offer support and hugs

[cabgirl]

I'm so sorry for your loss.

[ckmom71]

I am so sorry for your loss

[vballbaby]

I'm sorry for your loss. How are you feeling today? The first few days were the hardest for me.

[babyzebra]

Mar 9, 2015 14:43:59 GMT -5 vballbaby said:

I'm sorry for your loss. How are you feeling today? The first few days were the hardest for me.

Thanks for asking vballbaby. Physically, I'm feeling fine today with just mild to moderate cramps. I'm not doing as well emotionally.

I know some women really want a natural miscarriage at home as opposed to a D&C. I really did not and hoped to have a D&C early this week. Well, I had a natural miscarriage last night at home. I don't even know what to say about that experience except that I don't ever want to do that again. I really thought DH was going to pass out. I just need some time to process what happened, but I think I will eventually feel some closure with the way things happened.

[kristikayy26]

I'm so sorry for your loss. Big (HUGS) to you.