Post by tessymessy on Jan 19, 2015 18:34:30 GMT -5
**I mention my live LO below**
I know I am hyper sensitive to all things babies and pregnancy but come on....
Last week I has 2 pregnant coworkers come into my cubicle to ask me about how I got approval to work from home after LO was born. Then they asked me question after question about pregnancy and life with a newborn. Neither of them knew about my loss. I felt like I was punched in the stomach. The tears stung my eyes but I held it together until they left. At that point I just fell to pieces.
Another coworker of mine noticed I was out the week before while having my miscarriage. I told her I had a family emergency. She said, "did someone die?" I said yes. Then she asked about my LO and commented about how big he is now. Then she asked the dreaded question.. "so when are you having another?" Ugh
Today I had an appointment with my hygienist for a cleaning. Obviously I haven't seen her in 6 months. Guess who is super pregnant? Yup. She's 33 weeks and all she wanted to talk about while she scraped and cleaned my teeth was being pregnant and babies. I was stuck captive and couldn't even change the subject because her hands were all up in my mouth. I may have contemplated biting her...
Is anyone else wondering if the universe hates them?
Post by tessymessy on Jan 19, 2015 19:47:23 GMT -5
mistabinx Thank you. I really should keep a list of positives in my pocket. I know there are many things I am thankful for but in the heat of the moment, the sadness can be overwhelming. I swear every show I tried to watch the other day had a pregnant lady or babies.
mistabinx Thank you. I really should keep a list of positives in my pocket. I know there are many things I am thankful for but in the heat of the moment, the sadness can be overwhelming. I swear every show I tried to watch the other day had a pregnant lady or babies.
Oh I hear you. We were watching The Office again, nope. Resurrection, nope. Breaking Bad, nope. I looked at H and just said seriously, fml
That's when I turn off the tv, grab some chocolate and take a bubble bath!
mistabinx Thank you. I really should keep a list of positives in my pocket. I know there are many things I am thankful for but in the heat of the moment, the sadness can be overwhelming. I swear every show I tried to watch the other day had a pregnant lady or babies.
Oh I hear you. We were watching The Office again, nope. Resurrection, nope. Breaking Bad, nope. I looked at H and just said seriously, fml
dude! We started watching Breaking Bad right before the holidays. When we came home after finding out about our MMC, we decided to watch some - and it was the damn episode she gives birth. I started crying and it was quickly shut off.
OP: That is like some kind of evil trifecta! I'm sorry. I know what you mean - and of course we are hyper sensitive to all of it. So hard to avoid unfortunately, but sheesh - the universe owes you a break.
Oh I hear you. We were watching The Office again, nope. Resurrection, nope. Breaking Bad, nope. I looked at H and just said seriously, fml
dude! We started watching Breaking Bad right before the holidays. When we came home after finding out about our MMC, we decided to watch some - and it was the damn episode she gives birth. I started crying and it was quickly shut off.
OP: That is like some kind of evil trifecta! I'm sorry. I know what you mean - and of course we are hyper sensitive to all of it. So hard to avoid unfortunately, but sheesh - the universe owes you a break.
Post by octoberstars on Jan 20, 2015 18:45:11 GMT -5
The universe absolutely sucks. I found out last week one of my friends is due in July around the time I was due. I already had one friend with a similar due date as my first who is in her 3rd trimester now. Now I have to start all over watching a friend with a growing bump that reminds me where I would be if I hadn't miscarried. Fuck the universe and all the fertile bitches in it. I'm not ready to be happy for anyone yet.
Married 01-04-2013 *AMA* 40 in June 2015 **1-19-15 Childless, not by choice" 1st EDD- 12-02-13 MC 5/1/13 @4w6d 2nd EDD 11-13-14 MC 4/15/14: discovered 1st twin @5w 2nd twin @10w 3Rd BFP- 10-10-14 EDD 6/16/15: MC 10-16-14 @5w2d
Post by rosesandpeonies on Jan 22, 2015 22:11:36 GMT -5
I am so sorry sending hugs. I feel very similar. I have seen three announcements on Facebook in just the past few days. All due around what would have been my due date.
The universe absolutely sucks. I found out last week one of my friends is due in July around the time I was due. I already had one friend with a similar due date to move who is in her 3rd trimester now. Now I have to start all over watching a friend with a growing bump that reminds me where I would be if I hadn't miscarried. Fuck the universe and all the fertile bitches in it. I'm not ready to be happy for anyone yet.
I'm with you... My SIL is due 10 days after I was. I know exactly what you mean.
Yep. The universe sucks right now. I'm with both of you. I lived with another intern while DH moved across the country to set up our new home for my fellowship. (Internship ended in RVA on a Friday, fellowship started the next Monday in the midwest.) She and I were due on the same date. She's still pregnant - and I'm here (24 hours post d&c). I signed off of all social media when we found out about the mmc because it seemed to be flooded with babies. I signed back on to Facebook today, only for my first post on my feed to be about a friend from hs who is having her 4th child - due a week before I was. I give up.
OP - I'm sorry the universe sucks for you too. It looks like you are in good company.
Married 01-04-2013 *AMA* 40 in June 2015 **1-19-15 Childless, not by choice" 1st EDD- 12-02-13 MC 5/1/13 @4w6d 2nd EDD 11-13-14 MC 4/15/14: discovered 1st twin @5w 2nd twin @10w 3Rd BFP- 10-10-14 EDD 6/16/15: MC 10-16-14 @5w2d
Went to Target by myself to get out of the house for a bit. I also needed jeans since my jeans are all snug because I had already started having some bloat. So it was a welcome excuse to shop. The first thing I saw walking in? A couple from church with their two week old baby. I couldn't get out of eyeshot fast enough.
I suspect this will only be worse as I continue on. My SIL is pregnant and due a month after I was. We live in different states, but it still really hurts. I'm happy and excited for them, but it still really hurts. This is such a nightmare.
Sitting in the waiting room at my OB waiting for my ultrasound to confirm blighted ovum and surrounded by bellies. Guess who also is sporting a huge one? The ultrasound tech. And that's a smack in the face from the universe if I ever saw one. F.....
Married 01-04-2013 *AMA* 40 in June 2015 **1-19-15 Childless, not by choice" 1st EDD- 12-02-13 MC 5/1/13 @4w6d 2nd EDD 11-13-14 MC 4/15/14: discovered 1st twin @5w 2nd twin @10w 3Rd BFP- 10-10-14 EDD 6/16/15: MC 10-16-14 @5w2d
I totally understand where you are coming from. Over the past 4 years I have endured 4 pregnancies of my SILs. Too many friends to count and it feels just about everyone but me. The last of my friends have all gotten married in the past 18 months so there are bumps starting to pop up everywhere. Now there are 3 of us left without kids. The other two got married last spring/summer and being 34 have hopped on the baby train. We all want to be pregnant so badly. The other girls have had no issues, compared to my miserable pregnancy track record. I feel like we are all in a race and I am going to come out the sad sore loser in the end. Not to mention, I have been benched due to endometrium issues for 3months of treatment starting yesterday. The worst part is that I know they aren't going to want to tell me if they are pg bc they all know what I've been through.
Me:35 Polyps, PCOS, endometrial hyperplasia DH:40 Severe MFI TTC: 5 yr IVF-#1 -M/C #1= 9wks w/hb. M/C #2 - beta of 5. M/C # 3= 6wks. no hb. Jan/15 Diagnosed with Endometrial Hyperplaysia (pre cancer) treated with D&C and mirena. IVF #2 - 3 made to day 5. 2 good PGS. BFN 8/25. FET 10/9. BFFN 10/20/16 - Appt made with new RE and new clinic. Who knows what will happen now.
crmhoney feeling as if you're in a race with others adds more pressure and frustration during TTC. I'm sorry you feel that way. I know it's so very hard but try to remember you only need to concentrate on you, not what everyone else has going on. *hug*
Married 01-04-2013 *AMA* 40 in June 2015 **1-19-15 Childless, not by choice" 1st EDD- 12-02-13 MC 5/1/13 @4w6d 2nd EDD 11-13-14 MC 4/15/14: discovered 1st twin @5w 2nd twin @10w 3Rd BFP- 10-10-14 EDD 6/16/15: MC 10-16-14 @5w2d
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