Q for Been-there Moms: Size 5 Weeks Postpartum?

[Deleted]

Ladies, my oldest and dearest friend is getting married this summer and I am overjoyed.  She has asked me to be in her bridal party and I have accepted, because she is my oldest and dearest friend.  

As we think about planning attire, I would love to hear from you - what might I look like 5-ish weeks postpartum and how should I go about getting a dress?  Will I still need something in maternity?  Make sure we're ordering from somewhere with a liberal return policy, like Nordstrom, and then order several sizes and return whichever don't work?  

I'll also likely be nursing.

PLS HALP.

[shopgirl]

That is a tough question. I don't think you'd need something maternity, but you'd need a style that was forgiving in the stomach/chest area. And likely a couple of sizes bigger than you are currently.

[mackalack]

I was lucky - I dropped my 15 lbs of baby weight and an additional 20 lbs by 5 weeks. I've had friends who've had none of that happen.  

Edit: I don't want to come across braggy, so no photo.  But I was really shocked by how it came off, cause I did nothing other than BF - she was born in the middle of Jan.  You shouldn't need maternity.

[mackalack]

Oh - one thing I'll add - make sure there's room for boobs. Cause I had pornstar boobs when I was breastfeeding DD. I'd see how much weight you gain throughout the pregnancy and get a few options.

[valigrl21]

I generally gain about 40 pounds during pregnancy. Within the first month, I usually lose about 20 or so, the rest take about 6-9 months to come off. I don't think you need maternity, but something that is very forgiving around the tummy. Also, if you are nursing, you will need extra room in the boob area.

[wineandcake]

I was in a wedding about 3 months after having DS. I got sized for the dress at 20wks and added an inch or two in the chest and waist and had it altered about a week before the wedding. It was a little big, but they were able to fix it. It was a very forgiving style dress so it worked well.

[ashslatts24]

Jan 22, 2015 15:23:02 GMT -5 wineandcake said:

I was in a wedding about 3 months after having DS. I got sized for the dress at 20wks and added an inch or two in the chest and waist and had it altered about a week before the wedding. It was a little big, but they were able to fix it. It was a very forgiving style dress so it worked well.

I have a wedding 3 months after EDD and have been wondering how to go about this. I might roll it the way you did above, thanks!

[teresawe]

This is tough to answer because every woman loses the baby weight differently. I would say a dress either a size up or something very forgiving in the bust and tummy area. I don't think several sizes up is necessary.
Maybe pick two or three that meet the criteria and return the ones that don't fit when the time comes?

[imavera]

I'd anticipate a small bump to still be there, but not enough to need maternity. Likely similar to what you're sporting now- just squishier. If it's a dress that's forgiving for boobs/belly, you should be fine. If you have a choice, get a dress that's nursing accessible! It'll make your life less stressful.

[Deleted]

Jan 22, 2015 15:27:40 GMT -5 jnetx said:

Jan 22, 2015 15:08:15 GMT -5 shopgirl said:

That is a tough question. I don't think you'd need something maternity, but you'd need a style that was forgiving in the stomach/chest area. And likely a couple of sizes bigger than you are currently.

What she said. An empire waist would work pretty well. I was in a wedding around 6 weeks post partum last time. It was not so bad. I didn't spend the entire day with the bride like the rest of the bridal party. I did my own hair and make up at home and just showed up in time to put on my dress before pictures. My husband brought the baby in a separate car so they could show up right before the ceremony and leave when they were ready. I did stay to see the bride and groom off and help clean up. I left my husband two bottles and then nursed once during the reception. You may want to consider something that you can wear a bra with. At that point your supply may still be regulating and you will need nursing pads (which a bra will help with). The support of straps helps too. My dress had spaghetti straps so I wore a strapless bra and that worked fine.

That's a lot more info than you asked for, but there you go.

That's not too much info, it is exactly the sort of information that I need.  Thank you!!  

All these ideas and perspectives are great, since I know everyone and even every pregnancy is different, I was looking for the range so I could try to plan for various scenarios.  Especially things like "how to nurse in a formal gown."  I know I may not be able to be as "present" during the day as she was for mine, and I feel badly about that, but I don't know what else I can do.  Hopefully she'll be understanding and recognize that it's not about how much I care for her, but that there's going to be a very little person who might happen to need me more.  

[cgiles120812]

I was also lucky enough to lose my pregnancy weight plus 5 lbs and be in pre pregnancy clothes a few days after giving birth. I would look for something flowy and loose maybe around the stomach area.

[Deleted]

Jan 22, 2015 15:33:50 GMT -5 imavera said:

I'd anticipate a small bump to still be there, but not enough to need maternity. Likely similar to what you're sporting now- just squishier. If it's a dress that's forgiving for boobs/belly, you should be fine. If you have a choice, get a dress that's nursing accessible! It'll make your life less stressful.

Le sigh.  I have been in maternity for weeks.  But I guess if I had sized up, I would be able to be in regular sizes still, maybe.

I will see what is out there.  I'm kind of hoping she goes with "dress this length, this color" and doesn't specify designer or store, because that would make this easier.  I'm having visions of feeding the baby with my dress around my waist because I can't find a nursing style and (either way I guess) then her just spitting up ALL over me.  I guess as long as I have back-up clothes, and the dress makes it through pictures, all will be fine.  

[mrsklm09]

I just want to add that I lost the weight quickly but my body did not look the same as pre-pregnancy. Big nursing boobs, pouchy stomach, definitely not tone anywhere really. Just something else to keep in mind.

[ashiscute]

Jan 22, 2015 15:41:57 GMT -5 mrsklm09 said:

I just want to add that I lost the weight quickly but my body did not look the same as pre-pregnancy. Big nursing boobs, pouchy stomach, definitely not tone anywhere really. Just something else to keep in mind.

This is a great point. The pounds you lose is less relevant because you can get to pre pregnancy weight but your body will probably be a different shape. I would say get something with a lot of support in the boobs because you will need a quality bra and nursing pads. An empire dress waist will probably be enough cover. Your tummy will likely be loose and a pouch but not as hard or prominent as it is now.

[ncjulia12]

I'll be matron of honor in my sister's wedding 3 weeks postpartum.

Part of me is all, "I'm a STM, I'll know what I'm doing, tons of family will be there to help with DS and baby, I can have WINE(!), everything will be great!"

And the other part of me is a little worried about it being a logistical nightmare. In which I'm also chubby, sleep-deprived, and leaking milk.

But I think because it is my sister (and in your case, your good friend), the wonderful will definitely outweigh the hassles. And there will be wine.

She just wants us to do nudes/pinks/creams, so I'm looking for a dress I can wear a bra with straps, get a boob out easily, and is forgiving in the belly area. I'm going to wait until further along in the pregnancy to see what my weight gain is looking like before I choose a size. With DS, I gained waaaay too much (60 lbs), but the first 25ish came off pretty quick. Hopefully will keep the weight gain to only 25-30 (as recommended by my dr) this time, but still will probably order 2 sizes up bc of boobs. And because you can always get something tailored in- but not always out.

Also, I'm going to invest in one of these bad boys because I had too many people asked me when the baby was due a month after I had him: www.amazon.com/Bellefit-Postpartum-Post-Pregnancy-Medical-Grade-Compression/dp/B004PBJ1RS

This is my first choice for dress right now: www.modcloth.com/shop/dresses/champagne-at-midnight-dress-in-moonlight (I wouldn't wear the belt though.)

Way too much info, but I feel we are kindred bridesmaid spirits- except that I'm super jealous of your two extra weeks of recovery time.

[Deleted]

Jan 22, 2015 16:12:31 GMT -5 ncjulia12 said:

This is my first choice for dress right now: www.modcloth.com/shop/dresses/champagne-at-midnight-dress-in-moonlight (I wouldn't wear the belt though.)

That is super cute!  I love it.  It reminds me of the dress I wore to my bridal shower, which I loved and should have purchased (it was Rent the Runway).  

Which just dawned on me, that's potentially another solution if she allows us to pick our own dresses - I could get a bunch of things at Rent the Runway (depending on sizing, with the boobies, I'm worried I'll be a 16 and I don't know if they run that high).

Edited because "let's us do" sounds ok spoken, but was hurting my eyes.

[yelah250]

I lost my weight quickly but I was still pretty flabby 5 weeks pp. And I'd get something stretchy in the top for nursing. I'd get an empire waist dress with the ability to pull the top aside for breastfeeding. And buy some spanx

[maritimemama3]

I got married when DS was 7 weeks, and I had almost gone back to normal by then. My waist and ribcage were wider, though, and my breasts were gigantic. I would recommend a dress that has a natural waist and isn't too clingy below the waist... Bonus points for being able to slip off a strap for easy BF-ing access! (I had my seamstress put snaps on mine for this reason).

[brummy14]

PPs have pretty much nailed it -- I dropped the first 15-20lbs pretty fast (leaving about 15 more hanging around for longer), but my body shape was still all over the place. I still had a "bump" 4 weeks post partum. I had someone even comment on my "cute maternity style" as I was leaving the NICU in the elevator about four weeks after the girls were born (yes, it was the maternity floor, but still). She was SO nice about it, but I didn't have the heart to tell her I was totally bummed out that she still thought I was pregnant. :/

I was definitely still wearing maternity bottoms at that point - I definitely wasn't back into my regular clothes. I don't bounce back THAT fast. With Spanx and a forgiving dress, I might be able to get into some of my old dresses, but pants? Not a chance.

As PPs have said, DEFINITELY plan on extra boob space. Holy cow, you'll need it. 

[dawnviking]

I did not lose the weight quickly. My boobs were a DD (normally a B) and I still looked pregnant at 5 weeks. I had a c-section and I couldn't stand anything tight on my waist. I was wearing clothes 2 sizes bigger than normal for probably 6 months after the baby was born. Sorry to be a downer, but I wanted to offer advice from somebody who definitely didn't bounce right back.

[Deleted]

Jan 22, 2015 16:33:42 GMT -5 brummy14 said:

As PPs have said, DEFINITELY plan on extra boob space. Holy cow, you'll need it. 

This is what frightens me most.  One of the reasons I had to leave non-maternity sizes was because my chest didn't fit.  I started at a 36D.  I'm at a 38DDD now and I'm on the last hook of the bra, so will be time to size up again soon.  I don't know how much bigger they can get, but I am very afraid.  

[kristhegirl]

Jan 22, 2015 16:37:52 GMT -5 @officedronette said:

Jan 22, 2015 16:33:42 GMT -5 brummy14 said:

As PPs have said, DEFINITELY plan on extra boob space. Holy cow, you'll need it. 

This is what frightens me most.  One of the reasons I had to leave non-maternity sizes was because my chest didn't fit.  I started at a 36D.  I'm at a 38DDD now and I'm on the last hook of the bra, so will be time to size up again soon.  I don't know how much bigger they can get, but I am very afraid.  

I LOVE the face there, made me lol.

It takes about six weeks for your uterus to go back to regular size, which accounts for part of the extra around the middle even if you lose all your baby weight quickly.

I'd probably go for an empire waist style, size up for boobs, and alter it a week or so before the wedding. I'd also look for something I could wear a normal bra with, but then I have heifer boobs even when I'm not pregnant so strapless bras are a joke.

[ncjulia12]

@officedronette, yay, another Rent the Runaway-lover! I just rented a dress for a charity event in March. They had a similar one on clearance I wanted to buy because it was really drapey and forgiving and I thought I could wear it for the March thing and my sister's rehearsal dinner postpartum, but they were out of the size I needed. I've definitely looked there for bridesmaid possibilities, but can't really find anything that matches what my sister wants. I would also be just a little stressed about it fitting funny postpartum and not being able to tailor it.

[teresawe]

I was at a 38 H when I was fully engorged and at the height of nursing. I'm a 38 DD, when not pregnant and my boobs didn't go up dramatically in size during pregnancy. You never know what to expect.

[Deleted]

Jan 22, 2015 18:54:26 GMT -5 teresawe said:

I was at a 38 H when I was fully engorged and at the height of nursing. I'm a 38 DD, when not pregnant and my boobs didn't go up dramatically in size during pregnancy. You never know what to expect.

Wowsers.  This is what worries me.  Like they've grown so much before any milk has even come in.  Thanks.

[peanutbutter0807]

I was 20 lbs from my pre-pregnancy weight at that point, and my boobs were 3 cup sizes larger, band size about the same.  I lost 20 lbs right away and the other 20 stayed with me until three months after I quit breastfeeding.  I wore three pants sizes bigger when I went back to work, and I wore two sizes up in shirts (to accommodate boobs).  This was at the end of October (had baby in beginning of July).  It's really hard to guess, though, since you won't know how your body will respond!  I would go with something stretchy - maybe a wrap dress?  

[yelah250]

www.mothering.com/articles/letter-friends-cant-attend-children-event/. This reminded me of your wedding dilemma, @officedronette

[wells2010]

Jan 22, 2015 15:04:29 GMT -5 @officedronette said:

Ladies, my oldest and dearest friend is getting married this summer and I am overjoyed.  She has asked me to be in her bridal party and I have accepted, because she is my oldest and dearest friend.  

As we think about planning attire, I would love to hear from you - what might I look like 5-ish weeks postpartum and how should I go about getting a dress?  Will I still need something in maternity?  Make sure we're ordering from somewhere with a liberal return policy, like Nordstrom, and then order several sizes and return whichever don't work?  

I'll also likely be nursing.

PLS HALP.

I was in a wedding about 4 months PP. Definitely different, but I just got a really big size and then had it altered to fit. That worked out pretty well. I would maybe buy a few sizes too big and do the same. I think by 5-6 weeks PP I was back to my Pre-preg size. I had more of a chub, so take that into consideration too. Spanx will be your friend!

I was also breastfeeding.

[Nittany]

I'm overweight to start, gained about 15-20 pounds last time and lost it all right away… however my shape was forever changed with a bigger belly pooch. I'd definitely look for an empire waist or something not at all fitted across the stomach. My general size stayed the same.

[3timemom]

When you leave the hospital you will look about 5-6 months pregnant. Chances are you will pretty close to normal Size by then. I agree an empire style dress would probably be best, it's more forgiving and easier to hide if you still have a little that you need to get rid of. The other thing I would look I to is how close to the date you can have the dress altered? Like can you have it done the week before or even a few days before? Then you can get a few sizes bigger and have it taken down right before the wedding. Wearing a bra will probably also be super helpful like a PP said, you could be leaking or have super heavy big boobs and need some extra support to feel comfortable. It would also be nice if your planning to breastfed/need to pump During the day something that makes that easily accessible. Otherwise you could be totally taking it all the way down to do either of those.