I'm feeling down (possible triggers)

[teenybenoit]

Today was supposed to be my first OB visit. I was reminded by my work calendar which I forgot to take the appt off when I came back to work on Monday. That started my day.
Then scrolling through FB my pregnant friend who has said nothing to me since my first mc has pictures posted of her big beautiful pregnant belly in a cute dress on the beach by her cabin all smiles. I nearly broke down but I held strong.
Then on our way home from work we stopped into Starbucks and as I'm gently reminding my hubby about what appt was to happen today the woman in front of me turns to face me and smile and isn't she 7 or 8 months pregnant and glowing and I just lost it, I had to step out of line and go out side and break down.
I'm really having a hard time accepting that I may never be pregnant again or carry a baby to full term.
I stopped by our tattoo shop and spoke with the artist that has done a couple of tattoos for both DH and I and he is going to do a memorial tattoo for me on June 15th
I think I need that. Anyway, I hope everyone else's day was better.

[nikolie93]

Ugh, triggers are bad but days where there are multiple triggers sucks even more

I still have shitty moments but they do get less and less

*hugs*

[nikolie93]

Hit enter too soon. Derp.

I love the idea of a memorial tattoo and MH is drawing one for me that I'm going to get!

[PiradicalMaid]

I an so sorry today was rough. It sucks. You got through it. Deep breath and big hugs.

If either of you are willing to share your tattoos, I would love to see them. I think a memorial tattoo is such a touching idea.

[hollyberry]

I am somsorry your day was rough yesterday! I am sending you good vibes, and peaceful thoughts for a better day today! *hugs

[crazycatlady6]

teenybenoit- I want to get a tattoo as well, not sure the design yet but I have to not be a wuss to get it done.

I hope that today is a better day for you. (((HUGS)))

[muscari]

teenybenoit, *tight hugs* for you lady! I'm so sorry your friday was so incredibly sucky and full of triggers. Hoping your weekend has been the complete opposite of your Friday!

[NatalieDavid]

teenybenoit I hope you had a better weekend and hugs for a good week!

[teenybenoit]

Hey all,
I'm feeling a bit better, had my betas drawn on Saturday and was at 14 so still need to go for one more draw next Saturday and then the ultrasound.
My hubby took me up to our cabin this weekend and just let me cry it out and chill.
Each day is different.
We are off on vacation in 2 weeks and for 2 weeks so in trying to look forwards to that. I was going to give back one week for the time I was off for the loss but decided against it, I need a vacation. Time to reflect and rest.
I hope all of you are doing well.
Take care & hugs.

[nikolie93]

I am glad to hear you are feeling a bit better, lady! So nice that you were able to get away and chill out. With all of the craziness of our normal day to day lives, it's necessary to have time to decompress. And if that means crying it out, then so be it!

I am also glad you're keeping you original 2 weeks for vacation, you deserve it!

[sarahufl]

Sounds like a tough day

When I first got pregnant, I scheduled the 9 week appt with my OB (they don't see you till then). Then, I lost the pregnancy and had to have surgery for an Ectopic. So when I called to make my 2-week post-op, they said it would be tough to schedule and then my 9 week turned into the post-op.

I was really pissed that I couldn't just get a new appointment. Shit really stung.