A and his cousins were all disciplined with a wooden spoon his gram kept in her purse. It was never used, but the threat of it was enough to keep them in line. We practiced time outs when our nephew was a toddler. Putting him on a stool in the kitchen to stare at a grown up worked at the time. Talking things through NEVER worked for my brother's kids. The problem with logic and reason to explain why a situation is wrong from the perspective of an adult is that it created the opening for logic and reason for them to prove their perspective is right.
Post by leroybrown on Jan 23, 2015 11:49:15 GMT -5
The big kid we are struggling with, trying to get her into a developmental pedi to analyze some of her quirks, the regular pedi thinks it's just ADHD and wants to trial some meds.
The baby boy is doing well, just doing PT/OT to help him catch up. His motor development is quite delayed.
I really don't remember if I were ever spanked. I'll never forget a time my dad came towards me with his belt off and I was terrified, because I wasn't used to it, I was like 13 at the time. He and my mom were divorced at the time and I could hear her in the phone screaming not to touch me. I got caught doing something and he was pissed, but my mom saw that it wasn't all on me.
H was spanked with a switch when he was younger, that he had to pick out himself. I never had that and couldn't imagine. H had other forms of punishment also. I know one thing his parents made him do a lot was pick up rocks out of the yard, especially if his dad was getting ready to mow in a day or so and he was being bad. I was popped on the hand, i do remember. As I got older and if we were in public my mom would get the skin under my arm and pinch the fire out of it.
Ahh rock picking and stick picking I did a lot of that in my day, that was my dads favorite. It wasn't a bad punishment for us and it got us out of the house when we were being ridiculous.
Rock and stick picking here too!!! Plus pinecones!!!!
The big kid we are struggling with, trying to get her into a developmental pedi to analyze some of her quirks, the regular pedi thinks it's just ADHD and wants to trial some meds.
The baby boy is doing well, just doing PT/OT to help him catch up. His motor development is quite delayed.
I'm getting together with the Iowa A14 bumpies!!
So fun re: GTG!
I hope your developmental pedi can offer more information!
My dad is ruining yoga for me and I dont know how to tell him I dont want to practice with him.
That's rough!! Maybe just go the route of saying you enjoy the time to yourself and like to be alone?
I haven't been to yoga since before Christmas. But I'm paying a monthly membership fee. Despite this, I gave DH a hard time about buying a $50 phone case
My dad is ruining yoga for me and I dont know how to tell him I dont want to practice with him.
That's rough!! Maybe just go the route of saying you enjoy the time to yourself and like to be alone?
I haven't been to yoga since before Christmas. But I'm paying a monthly membership fee. Despite this, I gave DH a hard time about buying a $50 phone case
Please tell me this case was at least leather. Why would anyone spend that much money on a CASE?
Ahh rock picking and stick picking I did a lot of that in my day, that was my dads favorite. It wasn't a bad punishment for us and it got us out of the house when we were being ridiculous.
Rock and stick picking here too!!! Plus pinecones!!!!
Farmer's daughter here - I had to pick up rocks over 2000 acres of farmland before planting season. Do I win?
That's rough!! Maybe just go the route of saying you enjoy the time to yourself and like to be alone?
I haven't been to yoga since before Christmas. But I'm paying a monthly membership fee. Despite this, I gave DH a hard time about buying a $50 phone case
Please tell me this case was at least leather. Why would anyone spend that much money on a CASE?
It's actually 50% cheaper than his previous case too. He works with oils (precision machinist) so he can't touch his phone unless it's super protected. His cases have an all glass front and every inch is covered.
Oh and just to get in on the spanking debate we've got going on...
There is a TERRIFIC book - "how to talk so kids will listen and listen so kids will talk" by Adele Farber. FTM so no idea if it'll work but I think that's the problem with kids these days. They feel like they don't have anyone to talk to because parents aren't on their level and don't know how to get there.
I can't say I'm for or against spanking because I think there are WAY too many variables and it would be a case by case judgement for me. I won't be spanking because I think there are plenty of ways that will be more effective for me. This is based on a life of dog ownership and knowing that hitting them does nothing but make me grateful that they didn't one day decide to chop my face off. Because they could have.
This is more a confession of my naivete... Stupidly, I kept thinking that everything would get easier the older that DS got. Right?
I'm realizing now, that every day he gets more and more difficult. He's rolling over during diaper/clothing changes, he tries to push himself out of the bathtub. He takes the pacifier out of his mouth to play with it and then screams when he wants it back in. And recently he's been super ADD when it comes to eating. He'll unlatch, look around, decide he wants to babble to me because what he has to say is oh, so important. I am being met with so much resistance!
This is me also. I convinced myself when she was a newborn to just get to six months and it'll all get easier. She has set out to prove me wrong.
Post by 3magicbeans on Jan 23, 2015 12:50:32 GMT -5
Not touching the spanking debate. I would keep it as an option for something epic (idk what, but anti-spanking cousins IL that we are close with spanked their 4 yo for setting a campfire in his room. it was a real fire).
professorbinns I think I'll start calling it gbcbumping or g'bumping for short (like I'm a g'bumpie now...pronounced guh-bumping phonetically)
Not touching the spanking debate. I would keep it as an option for something epic (idk what, but anti-spanking cousins IL that we are close with spanked their 4 yo for setting a campfire in his room. it was a real fire).
professorbinns I think I'll start calling it gbcbumping or g'bumping for short (like I'm a g'bumpie now...pronounced guh-bumping phonetically)
A real campfire ? that is terrifying. I will try out g'bumping today and see if it sticks.
DVMmomma I'm so glad you referenced disciplining your dog. That's my only experience too (besides nannying, and I would never hit a child while nannying). I don't know where I stand on spanking. It's probably something H and I should discuss soon.
My opinion on discipline though is to teach him how to act and behave in different situations. Sometimes, I won't care if people think he's being rude or rowdy. Sometimes, it's necessary that he understands the importance of being polite and considerate to those around him.
I got one more than I promise I'm done...for now. There is a lady I work with that is a complete haint. Everyone hates this bitch. At work I am very level headed and try to be Switzerland between her and all the other pharmacists. But really I can't stand her sanctimonious ass.
Ok I am finally ready to confess...my pediatrician told me to try dairy free for a week to see if it helped lessen DS BM's as he has an average of 6-8 per day. This was at his 4 month check up...he is now 5 months and I still haven't tried. I keep finding excuses...mother of the year over here. Total mom fail...time I quit being selfish. (feels good to get that off my chest...oh the guilt I feel...if only I loved ice cream a little less)
Sometimes, he won't be able to control himself to be polite and considerate.
Oh I agree. But I think my parent's reason for spanking was mostly so we were always polite. I guess I was trying to say that if there are situations where I'm expected to behave a certain way, I hope I can teach him how and why by example and not fear. Other times, he shouldn't worry what people think. This is where my parents were different. We were to ALWAYS behave where adults were around. It was very... Stifling? I don't know what word I can put on it. But I see where it has negative affects in my job today because sometimes I'm afraid to speak up in meetings just because someone is senior to me. I don't want my LO to have to relearn behaviors when he's older.
I'm trying to sort out my thoughts, and not doing a good job. Also, my BIL recently said that the parents of a cranky baby had no business taking her on a plane where she's disruptive to others. And that irked me. I completely disagree with him. That baby is a person too, and I wish more people respected that babies are people and sometimes they have hard days. But I don't want my LO growing up thinking he can act whatever way he wants all the time. I hope I'm making sense. I haven't had to think much about discipline because he's only 5mo. And right now, I really just can't be angry with him. He flashes his one-tooth grin at me and I melt.
Post by yogini kiki on Jan 23, 2015 13:37:09 GMT -5
I think spanking is my one and only "I will never thing." Everything else I can see myself doing...but spanking as a form of discipline I hope I will never do. I would judge myself harshly for it and would judge others harshly as well.
I'm not touching the spanking thing because I'm a first time mom and I don't know my head from my ass most days.
My FFFC? I accidentally used my husband's toothbrush this morning and I'm not going to tell him.
I think my husband used my toothbrush for a while before either of us realized he got them confused. One day it thought it was odd that my toothbrush was already wet like it had been used but I had yet to brush my teeth. It was gross. Like sitting on a toilet seat that is already warm from someone else's butt.
Oh and just to get in on the spanking debate we've got going on...
There is a TERRIFIC book - "how to talk so kids will listen and listen so kids will talk" by Adele Farber. FTM so no idea if it'll work but I think that's the problem with kids these days. They feel like they don't have anyone to talk to because parents aren't on their level and don't know how to get there.
I can't say I'm for or against spanking because I think there are WAY too many variables and it would be a case by case judgement for me. I won't be spanking because I think there are plenty of ways that will be more effective for me. This is based on a life of dog ownership and knowing that hitting them does nothing but make me grateful that they didn't one day decide to chop my face off. Because they could have.
Spanked my pit once, when she pottied on the floor while looking at me, she never did it again. My older dog I don't remember spanking but I'm sure I have. Mostly she gets popped on the nose bc she is noisy. Usually raising my voice is enough. Hoping it will be the same for my kids. My mom was the same way. If she raised her voice we knew she meant business.
I'm not touching the spanking thing because I'm a first time mom and I don't know my head from my ass most days.
My FFFC? I accidentally used my husband's toothbrush this morning and I'm not going to tell him.
I think my husband used my toothbrush for a while before either of us realized he got them confused. One day it thought it was odd that my toothbrush was already wet like it had been used but I had yet to brush my teeth. It was gross. Like sitting on a toilet seat that is already warm from someone else's butt.
I like when the seat is warm. It is better than cold and it isnt like a cold seat means nobody's butt was ever there.
I think my husband used my toothbrush for a while before either of us realized he got them confused. One day it thought it was odd that my toothbrush was already wet like it had been used but I had yet to brush my teeth. It was gross. Like sitting on a toilet seat that is already warm from someone else's butt.
I like when the seat is warm. It is better than cold and it isnt like a cold seat means nobody's butt was ever there.
True, but it totally weirds me out to go in a public restroom and have to go in a stall immediately after someone and the seat is still warm.
I think spanking is my one and only "I will never thing." Everything else I can see myself doing...but spanking as a form of discipline I hope I will never do. I would judge myself harshly for it and would judge others harshly as well.
#gettingcomfyinmyjudgeypants
I agree with this completely. I remember getting spanked a few times as a little kid, and got smacked around a little as a pre-teen. It was not a controlled form of punishment, it was done out of anger and frustration. It didn't teach me anything. And I don't know how there is a "good" way to administer corporal punishment. You do it in anger or in the moment, you are teaching your children violence is okay when you are mad. If you wait until you are calm, you instill a sense of dread in your children? And seriously, waiting until you are "calm" to hit your kid? Seems kind of sociopathic.
I wish I could send J somewhere for the rest of the day. He won't stop touching me and I am losing my mind! Like I sit down at the table to eat and he climbs on my chair and hovers. Toddlers can be so annoying.
Then Comes Family, LLC is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising
program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com.