When is it appropriate to offer to host a shower?

[missmarypoppins1]

I am 22w right now. My best friend offered to do my shower when I was about 10 weeks. No one else ever brought it up. Now my MIL and SIL are furious that she's hosting it. They insist they were going to start planing in the new year and that that's normal to not mention it until someone is 25w along. I think that's crazy!!
Who is right here??

[jags8]

Dec 11, 2015 15:31:32 GMT -5 missmarypoppins1 said:

I am 22w right now. My best friend offered to do my shower when I was about 10 weeks. No one else ever brought it up. Now my MIL and SIL are furious that she's hosting it. They insist they were going to start planing in the new year and that that's normal to not mention it until someone is 25w along. I think that's crazy!!
Who is right here??

First of all, they are being ridiculous for being furious. Someone can inquire about hosting a shower whenever. I was asked at 15 weeks to start thinking about when I'd like mine. Of course, the longer you wait, the more conflicts you may run into for planning "when."

Can your MIL and SIL host one with just your DH's side of the family, and your best friend host one with just your side and friends?

[ECB]

Dec 13, 2015 11:34:08 GMT -5 jags8 said:

First of all, they are being ridiculous for being furious. Someone can inquire about hosting a shower whenever. I was asked at 15 weeks to start thinking about when I'd like mine. Of course, the longer you wait, the more conflicts you may run into for planning "when."

Can your MIL and SIL host one with just your DH's side of the family, and your best friend host one with just your side and friends?

My eyes are rolling all over that they are "furious" over this.  There is no rule about when people can offer. 

And ditto jags8 - you can  have more than one shower.  Let them host a shower for family (or specifically their side) and your friend can host a friends one and maybe also your family.

[harlowjune1984]

Sounds like they are just upset that someone else offered to host you one before they did. Its really not that big of a deal, and I would do what the previous posters mentioned....just do separate ones. That usually works out a little better anyway, keeping the cost down for both sets of hosts.

[partyinmytummy]

The day I got my BFP I was already meeting my two best friends for a play date. They both knew we were trying to get pregnant so I told them when we met up. The first reaction out of one of them was, "OMG, we're definitely throwing you a shower!"

I agree with PPs that having more than one shower is NBD, especially if the guest list is split between totally different groups. Maybe give them an earlier date of availability if they are being such babies about it, so they get to do the first one. (I probably wouldn't even be that generous though.)

[sarahandeddie]

I've been planning my sister's shower since the day she got her bfp. I think it's ridiculous they are mad. Besides, your MIL shouldn't be hosting a shower anyway.

[mrshall1027]

Agree with others about your in laws being upset. If you don't want two showers, could your friend host along with your in laws?

[Deleted]

Feb 9, 2017 12:25:54 GMT -5 mrshall1027 said:

Agree with others about your in laws being upset. If you don't want two showers, could your friend host along with your in laws?

This is from December '15. Check your dates.