How do you deal with getting older?

[tribute17]

I've been struggling with this lately for some reason. It might be because I am 90% done having kids, we moved, I'm 35, I don't know. All of my new hairs are coming in gray, my muscles and joints are sore more than they should be, im tired, etc. We went skiing last weekend and I was way more tired than I used to get. My H has been feeling old lately too. He noticed his hair is thinning on top. How do you deal with it?

Maybe I should have waited for Monday whines...

[summergirl1211]

Honestly I've been feeling more down about getting "old" lately. I also don't know if it's because I'm in my mid-30's, if it's because I'm dealing with TTTC and thyroid stuff, or just going through one of those phases. It's hard. I hate that I'm tired most days. I hate that I'm getting more wrinkles and I have random muscle/joint pain. I just keep reminding myself that I'll never be this young again and to enjoy things as they are, because there's nothing else I can do. It's a good reminder (for me at least) to live in the moment, if that makes any sense.

[somethingcleverer]

I try to look at every day as a gift because even young people aren't guaranteed tomorrow. So all the grays and lines are just signs that you're living life and even though society tells us we should be young and flawless, getting old is actually pretty awesome.

[mightybee]

My struggle with getting older has been with feeling like I'm living a meaningful life. I often find myself looking forward to what's next instead of being present and enjoying the moment. My sister got me into looking at meditation as a way to be more mindful. Now the real trick is dedicating/finding some time for it!

[babywinks]

I'm 34 so I don't think I'm "old" but I definitely feel like I don't look "young" anymore either. Many people used to tell me I looked young for my age and now I don't think I look like I'm in my 20s so I must look my age now. I feel good though - thanks to running! So I don't feel that old I guess.

[xanthepants]

I think that although I don't feel beautiful anymore, like I'm certainly not turning heads and I'm rather that invisible middle aged woman that never gets hit on anymore, I've got something equally good...wisdom. I love that I understand life better and I wouldn't trade my knowledge of understanding people, of reading a moment, of empathy etc. Take care of what you do have. Appreciate your body for what it does do, gets you out of bed, and when you have a good day, that's great. Treat it with kindness and it gives back to you. I don't worry about flawless skin, I worry about skin cancer. I don't worry about about long luscious locks, I think about flattering cuts, or wash and go. I'm going to look back in 10 years and think I was ridiculous for not thinking I was beautiful right In this moment now, I know that. It's all perspective.

[xanthepants]

Eta. You are not ridiculous, I just mean, I often chide myself for being hard on myself when I know that I'll look back and think "What was I thinking! I was so cute and young!"

[barefoot84]

I find yoga has helped a lot. I feel stronger and more flexible than ever, so I'm not as bitter towards my new body as I was.

[mrsrek10]

Hair color. It hides the gray

Really, age has never bothered me. I have lost close friends to death at a young age so I truly just appreciate that I get the chance to get older. Sounds cliche but it's true. Plus, I feel like I get better with age on the inside. I am just more comfortable with myself.

[roo1582]

Age in general has not bothered me. To me, age is just a number and really means nothing. The only time I find myself really wistful of youth is when it takes longer to bounce back after working out or drinking too much. Sometimes my body can't keep up like it used to. I've been lucky in that I look younger than 34. It's kind of funny because I feel like my close group of friends, while we have aged, none of us really look "old". Maybe it's because we've known each other so long and see each other so often that I don't really see the aging.

My biggest adjustment is more to adjusting to social changes. Smaller group of friends, less active social life, etc. I just try to remind myself that I'm lucky where I'm at, both physically and mentally, compared to lots of others. And I am also just focusing more on my health and trying to be more active to help keep this body going.

[jennmm]

I think these are going to be the best years of my life. My kids are young but old enough to enjoy things and way less stressful than babies. I'm still in my 30s and healthy. These are the years I'll look back on with the most fondness I think. Honestly, I wouldn't want to be 25 again. I like my 30s better. Go tell a 90 year old you're old and she'll laugh and tell you that you are still a baby. I think I'll have a harder time when my kids get older and begin to have their own lives.

[lainikins]

Mar 17, 2016 6:49:36 GMT -5 jennmm said:

I think these are going to be the best years of my life. My kids are young but old enough to enjoy things and way less stressful than babies. I'm still in my 30s and healthy. These are the years I'll look back on with the most fondness I think. Honestly, I wouldn't want to be 25 again. I like my 30s better. Go tell a 90 year old you're old and she'll laugh and tell you that you are still a baby. I think I'll have a harder time when my kids get older and begin to have their own lives.

Thank you so much for this much needed perspective. I am having a hard time aging. I am about to turn 30 in less than a month and this past week my first really close friend that I grew up with turned 30. I have been just feeling down about it even though I realize that it is just a number. I still don't want my birthday to come this year, though.

[mrsrek10]

Mar 17, 2016 6:56:24 GMT -5 lainikins said:

Mar 17, 2016 6:49:36 GMT -5 jennmm said:

I think these are going to be the best years of my life. My kids are young but old enough to enjoy things and way less stressful than babies. I'm still in my 30s and healthy. These are the years I'll look back on with the most fondness I think. Honestly, I wouldn't want to be 25 again. I like my 30s better. Go tell a 90 year old you're old and she'll laugh and tell you that you are still a baby. I think I'll have a harder time when my kids get older and begin to have their own lives.

Thank you so much for this much needed perspective. I am having a hard time aging. I am about to turn 30 in less than a month and this past week my first really close friend that I grew up with turned 30. I have been just feeling down about it even though I realize that it is just a number. I still don't want my birthday to come this year, though.

I will say ditto to the 30's being a great season. I'm 38 so I'm heading to the Fabulous Forties soon but have enjoyed my 30's. Enjoy turning 30. I had a birthday party that looked like a 21st bday instead of a 30th. It was so fun! I think all my friends would agree that we would do the 30's again but not the twenties. Of course, we were dumb through most of our twenties...so there is that, lol

[xanthepants]

The thirties were the absolute best. Seriously. You are still young to enjoy so much, but you have the smarts to not do stupid stuff that gets you in trouble - hee hee. I LOVED my thirties.

[tribute17]

Thanks guys. I know there are bigger problems in the world, it just seems to be hitting me recently. I guess it's mostly like roo said. It's not the number but the way my body is. I went skiing and I could hardly walk. I guess I can't be that old because I have a 7 month old. Just need to snap out of it and think about my gramma who is 90. Try to enjoy everyrhing because that is what will matter when I'm 90.

[aimeefarrahfowler]

I just turned 34 last month and I feel so old a lot of days. I'm just so tired all the time.

Also I have two coworkers who are 24 and 26 and they make me feel ancient. Yesterday one of them was saying "I want a dog but I'm not ready to take care of one. I think when I'm 28 I'll have my own apartment and then I'll get a dog", like 28 is still this far-off concept for her, lol

[jennmm]

Mar 17, 2016 14:36:13 GMT -5 aimeefarrahfowler said:

I just turned 34 last month and I feel so old a lot of days. I'm just so tired all the time.

Also I have two coworkers who are 24 and 26 and they make me feel ancient. Yesterday one of them was saying "I want a dog but I'm not ready to take care of one. I think when I'm 28 I'll have my own apartment and then I'll get a dog", like 28 is still this far-off concept for her, lol

That is hysterical. I could see 30 but 28.

[britbratjf]

Mar 17, 2016 9:34:18 GMT -5 tribute17 said:

Thanks guys. I know there are bigger problems in the world, it just seems to be hitting me recently. I guess it's mostly like roo said. It's not the number but the way my body is. I went skiing and I could hardly walk. I guess I can't be that old because I have a 7 month old. Just need to snap out of it and think about my gramma who is 90. Try to enjoy everyrhing because that is what will matter when I'm 90.

I have noticed how achy, etc I've been (and I'll be 31 in June) and honestly I think it's mostly due to the pregnancy, being out of shape, carrying around a baby all day. I'm hoping that as Freya gets older & I get back into good workout habits that will help some of my aches & pains.

[tribute17]

Mar 17, 2016 18:49:58 GMT -5 britbratjf said:

Mar 17, 2016 9:34:18 GMT -5 tribute17 said:

Thanks guys. I know there are bigger problems in the world, it just seems to be hitting me recently. I guess it's mostly like roo said. It's not the number but the way my body is. I went skiing and I could hardly walk. I guess I can't be that old because I have a 7 month old. Just need to snap out of it and think about my gramma who is 90. Try to enjoy everyrhing because that is what will matter when I'm 90.

I have noticed how achy, etc I've been (and I'll be 31 in June) and honestly I think it's mostly due to the pregnancy, being out of shape, carrying around a baby all day. I'm hoping that as Freya gets older & I get back into good workout habits that will help some of my aches & pains.

I think that's a lot of it. Just haven't been the same since I broke the ankle and being pregnant. And William is in that phase where I can't put him down and I have to hold him while he naps so no time for exercise. My body just aches all of the time in weird places. I think you've got a point. Hoping I can get some walks and yoga in soon.

[britbratjf]

tribute17 I keep telling myself I really need to start working out more but sleep/housework & baby all get in the way. I get maybe 2/week & I'm reluctant to do any ab workout bc im90% sure I have some separation.

[MissMusic]

TBH, I avoid people who might have thought highly of me when I looked better and was on the path to accomplishment. I'm not big on doing my hair or makeup, so I can't really just slide by anymore. I also feel like i haven't done much with my life, so its embarrassing to talk to people who have or who expected me to be greater than I turned out.

My secret to getting old gracefully is isolation and a rocking chair

[barefoot84]

Mar 19, 2016 9:53:29 GMT -5 MissMusic said:

TBH, I avoid people who might have thought highly of me when I looked better and was on the path to accomplishment. I'm not big on doing my hair or makeup, so I can't really just slide by anymore. I also feel like i haven't done much with my life, so its embarrassing to talk to people who have or who expected me to be greater than I turned out.

My secret to getting old gracefully is isolation and a rocking chair

I think you turned out great

[laurski81]

I don't know...wine?

In all honesty I didn't really feel any older until Cece came along and my H started school. That's when all of a sudden I started having a hard time losing weight, my hair started coming in more gray than ever, and my H is in school with young 20 something girls. I feel like I went from semi- young and still getting carded at the package store to a frumpy, tired, more wrinkly and crotchety "older" lady. Working out has helped me feel better about myself and I still splurge and get my hair done because I enjoy it. I try not to get too hung up on it because it's not like I can somehow get any younger but I am trying to improve my attitude because that will be better for me and my family.

[aimeefarrahfowler]

We were just talking about this case at work that goes back to 2005 and my coworker says "oh my god, this case is so old! I was a freshman in high school in 2005!"

Yeah, I can't deal with this.

[tribute17]

One thing that always got me was when I realized that I had been dating H longer than my students had been alive.

[cbear]

Well I just got on some anxiety meds sooo apparently I'm not handling it as well as I thought I was lol

[barefoot84]

Mar 22, 2016 20:41:53 GMT -5 cbear said:

Well I just got on some anxiety meds sooo apparently I'm not handling it as well as I thought I was lol

Sorry you're dealing with some anxiety cbear. I hope the meds are helping.

[cbear]

Mar 30, 2016 14:02:27 GMT -5 barefoot84 said:

Mar 22, 2016 20:41:53 GMT -5 cbear said:

Well I just got on some anxiety meds sooo apparently I'm not handling it as well as I thought I was lol

Sorry you're dealing with some anxiety cbear. I hope the meds are helping.

Thanks! They are some, I started with a super small dose so I think I need to bump it up but it's helping a little