What do you talk about at parties?

[tribute17]

We are going to Hs boss' house for dinner and a get together with the lab. I've only met them all once and really only talked to a couple of them, and it was the night we moved here and I had just gotten off of a plane with two kids so I not sure I was at my best mentally.

I'm not as worried about the lab people but there will be other professors there. What are your go to topics when with people you don't know? I'm usually fine after a little while I just have trouble starting the conversations and sounding somewhat intelligent. Let's assume they don't want to talk about work, because I probably wouldn't be able to keep up.

I also feel like all I have right now is the kids and I try not to be one of those people that only talks about kids. All I can think of is Chechnya, from Bridget jones diary.

[somethingcleverer]

I usually ask people a lot of questions about themselves until we find a common thread. Since you are new to the area I would start with something like asking how they like the area, what restaurants they like, how they like working for the school etc. Or I'll compliment them on something they are wearing, ask wear they got it stuff like that. People like to talk about themselves so I have good luck starting conversations by just asking general questions and you don't have to worry about sounding like you don't know what you are talking about.

[xanthepants]

Since you are new to the area I'd feed off that. Day trips in the area, best restarants, best things to do with kids around town or nearby. Also I'm a big music and art fan so what was their favorite last show or who is coming that they'd like to see. Any good art shows or festivals I should check out?

[traceyt07]

I listen to a lot of npr and I feel like that gives me a lot of talking points.

[aimeefarrahfowler]

People like to talk about themselves, so I usually ask them a lot of questions, like somethingcleverer said. You could ask them where they went to college, did they like it there? How'd they get from there to where they're working? How did they meet their spouse? I love that bracelet, where did you get it? That kind of thing. I am not really outgoing and hate small talk, so I find it easier to just ask a bunch of questions instead of trying to think of a "topic".

Usually though I just end up standing near people, listening to their conversation and grinning like a fool. >_<

[cbear]

People love talking about themselves so I usually ask questions to get to know them, work, kids, etc.

Any trips planned, for you or them.

I also agree since you are new to the area ask about people's favorite restaurant, park, things they like to do.

You will do great!!

[jennmm]

This is the kind of thing I suck at with my anti social tendencies. But, all the above is great advice. People do like to talk about themselves and that is a good way to find a common interest.

[tribute17]

Thanks guys. It's very rare that I go to a party and don't know anyone. And even rarer that I go and I'm the least educated there. It's a little intimidating. But I can talk movies with the best of them so that will be my back up. Asking about the area is good. I'll make that my initial topic if I need one. I'm really pretty social but it seems like on the spot I have some trouble starting things. Am I the only one?

[vanessalc]

... I'm the person talking to the cat or dog.