Post by starrynight14 on May 26, 2016 0:30:40 GMT -5
School's out for the summer! And to be honest, I'm scared I'm going to be a boring and lame parent. It's hard to get motivated when I have no where that I HAVE to be. I'm going to have 3 kiddos. And I'm afraid we're just going to be stuck in a messy house all day. Ideally, I would want to do more hands on activities. I just feel like it's so much easier when I have help. Like when DH or any of my siblings are involved with certain activities, it's so much more easier and enjoyable because I have help. Sometimes I don't even want to inistagte or try to get going on "fun activities" because it's so much work to do on my own. It's always been a desire for me to be a SAHM and now I feel like I suck at it because I can't handle things alone some days. That's my vent/rant.
My questions for SAHM's. Any fun plans for the summer? How often do you meet up/interact with other people? How do you handle single parenting all day? Why do you enjoy being a SAHM?
(I suppose these questions apply to working moms as well. I guess I just need motivation when single parenting. Especially when I'm doing it all day/week)
Well I'm not a sahm, but I did just take maternity leave. I tried to get out of the house every day for a little. Sometimes that meant just walking around the neighborhood. Play grounds inside malls are good too.
Post by gratefulgirl on May 26, 2016 11:53:59 GMT -5
I am only a part-time at home mom, but I made a bucket list for spring and summer since it's DD1's last year without school. We have/plan to:
- Hit up local museums. Turns out DD1 loves art galleries; DD2 is along for the ride (at least she likes riding public transit intto the city). There are a few big name exhibits coming to our nearest city this summer. The hours between museum open and naptime pretty much determine our schedule. - Gone berry picking (OK, this one is easy because my parents have a hobby berry farm and we can pick for free, plus they play with the kids while I am there) - Visited several local gardens. It's outside time, but a little less kid-centric than park time. The best so far was a garden that combined a playground AND a garden! - Gone to kid-centric performances (dance, music, puppets, whatever) either free or paid at local venues - Gone to local historic houses that are known to be welcoming to kids. - Gone to local splash pads that are already open. We'll add in more as more open up. - Local "special" parks outside of our usual. The kind with carousels, boat rides, mini golf, that sort of thing.
I try to do one thing from my bucket list a weekly. Sometimes I invite friends, sometimes I don't.
I'm going to be honest - I don't do a lot of crafty hands on stuff with both kids. DD2 still puts most things in her mouth and it's just too tough. I save the Pinterest-worthy hands-on stuff for when DD2 is napping and DD1 is either not yet down for quiet time or already up. DD2 gets to color and play, but it's far less formal. With DD1 I will do the occasional science experiment, sensory project, or special craft project.
I also took some comfort recently from an article a friend sent me that showed that what was most important to kids younger than school age was a present, caring, calm (not that I'm calm nearly as often as I should be) caregiver in the ups and downs of every day life. Adding in specialized activities didn't matter nearly so much as just being steady through the regular life.
During the school year we also have a weekly mom's group/playgroup type thing where the parents are doing one thing while the kids are in childcare in another location (kind of like MOPS). Having something like that helps structure my week a little.
Most of our summer fun is going to be dominated by DD1 being on swim team and having 10 a.m. practices. I am not looking forward to having my adventures out of the house cut into like that.
I'm not a SAHM but I am home for the summer. I try to get out with the kids every day- even if it's just to pick up a gallon of milk or take a walk around the block. Once a week I plan a "bigger" outing- go to the zoo, aquarium, big park further away, union station downtown, etc. When we're home, I don't get to do too much with A. Between tending to the baby, preparing meals, and keeping up on laundry/ dishes, I don't have much extra time. We do play with toys and read stories but I don't have time to prep hands on, crafty activities.
We don't have a lot of local things to go to that PP's have talked about. As far as getting out of the house we will go to the park, a nearby trail, pool, or grocery shopping. If I don't feel like going anywhere but want to be outside, we bought a small plastic pool, chalk, a swing, and a sandbox. Last year, Nora would sit and pick grass while I would pull weeds. I'm not crafty at all and don't even try to be so if that's not your thing, don't worry!
Post by brachysira on May 26, 2016 19:14:27 GMT -5
We try to host playdates, go to moms' group stuff, meet up with friends, or at least find some kids at the park a few times/week. We have most mornings and afternoons booked with some kind of activity. In the summer, we sleep a bit later and then do an evening activity too--usually go to a big playground or swimming, which are both easier with DH.
In the summer, we go on a lot of hikes with a tot hiking group on facebook. See if you have Hike it Baby. We play at playgrounds. Libraries have storytime and sometimes indoor play areas. Sometimes there are other summer reading events too. Some classes like music, nature, or language are expensive with many kids but also doable. Yes, berry picking. Blueberries are pretty easy. We have a children's garden which is fun to visit but there are also a lot of events. Splash pads are a lot easier than pools, but pools can work if everyone has a life jacket. Nature centers can have great outdoor play areas as well as indoor areas, and there can be programs there too. Zoos. DD is 3 and she's doing a preschool camp for a few weeks and I may sign her up for some other things. Indeed grocery shopping and walks around the neighborhood are interesting enough outings. Museums and indoor play places when it is rainy.
At home, we have outside toys like a baby pool and also put a bunch of regular toys outside like a chalk board, we do easy crafts like arrange lentils in playdough or paint about once/week, and I rotate toys inside.
I do most of our activities in the mornings. It usually just involves walking to/around the mall. I've gone to the zoo a couple times. When the weather gets warmer, I'll likely go to the splash pads around town and likely the beach.
We have a playground the next street over so we go there a lot as well.
We go to gymnastics, swimming, and a outdoor nature preschool playgroup at a local park. We also all attend some of DD1s homeschool activities, and LO loves to play with all the other siblings/ "babies" (as she calls them). This summer, I'm hoping to play around the yard (I'm ordering a kiddie sprinkler from Amazon, and I'll probably haul out the water table this weekend). We also hit the local playground, local state parks (there are several within about 20-30 min of us), and we have a membership at the zoo and the local children's museum. LO is really not ready for structured crafts so I'll hold off on that but she does love to play with crayons and markers. We'll hopefully hit the beach (about a two hour drive) a few times. FWIW, I love crafty stuff and have Pinterest boards full of cooking, painting, gardening, etc that I want to do with her some day, but at least for my kid, 21-22 months is just too young. She'd rather spend 45 min putting on and taking off ten strands of Mardi Gras beads that she found in a box, so I let her so her thing. IMO don't worry about trying to do specific "fun" things. At this age, introducing a new material to explore (a Tupperware tray full of sand on the patio, bubble machine, playdoh, etc) will get you more mileage than trying to do an "activity" with them. But YMMV obviously. In answer to your other questions: single parenting during the day isn't really a big deal to me, maybe because it's my normal. We have a routine going, and I try to hold off on things that are dramatically easier with help until evenings/weekends. I also make the weekdays mostly kid-focused (homeschool and toddler care) and not about cooking and chores around the house too much, or I go crazy. I interact with non-family people three week days out of the week, at least- we have homeschool groups Tuesday and Friday and LO's gymnastics on Thursdays. I'm pretty anti-social so I don't mind a bit not socializing more than that. TBH most days I'm more than happy to have all of my non-family adult interaction be when I place my order at Starbucks. Things I like about SAH specific to being home with LO (homeschooling a teen is an entirely different ballgame with its own pros and cons): -having the time with LO to just be- reading books, doing nap time cuddles, all the day-to-day life stuff -having flexibility to do more things with her than I could otherwise do (eg she can be involved in more activities and I can take her more places because we're not trying to do it all on weekends) -going places when it's less crowded (this makes me probably irrationally happy- crowded stores and attractions like the zoo, museum, etc, make me irritable) -having a flexible schedule both for LO and myself- (if she sleeps late, wakes early, or were in the mood for a lazy morning in our pjs, so be it)
We go to gymnastics, swimming, and a outdoor nature preschool playgroup at a local park. We also all attend some of DD1s homeschool activities, and LO loves to play with all the other siblings/ "babies" (as she calls them). This summer, I'm hoping to play around the yard (I'm ordering a kiddie sprinkler from Amazon, and I'll probably haul out the water table this weekend). We also hit the local playground, local state parks (there are several within about 20-30 min of us), and we have a membership at the zoo and the local children's museum. LO is really not ready for structured crafts so I'll hold off on that but she does love to play with crayons and markers. We'll hopefully hit the beach (about a two hour drive) a few times. FWIW, I love crafty stuff and have Pinterest boards full of cooking, painting, gardening, etc that I want to do with her some day, but at least for my kid, 21-22 months is just too young. She'd rather spend 45 min putting on and taking off ten strands of Mardi Gras beads that she found in a box, so I let her so her thing. IMO don't worry about trying to do specific "fun" things. At this age, introducing a new material to explore (a Tupperware tray full of sand on the patio, bubble machine, playdoh, etc) will get you more mileage than trying to do an "activity" with them. But YMMV obviously. In answer to your other questions: single parenting during the day isn't really a big deal to me, maybe because it's my normal. We have a routine going, and I try to hold off on things that are dramatically easier with help until evenings/weekends. I also make the weekdays mostly kid-focused (homeschool and toddler care) and not about cooking and chores around the house too much, or I go crazy. I interact with non-family people three week days out of the week, at least- we have homeschool groups Tuesday and Friday and LO's gymnastics on Thursdays. I'm pretty anti-social so I don't mind a bit not socializing more than that. TBH most days I'm more than happy to have all of my non-family adult interaction be when I place my order at Starbucks. Things I like about SAH specific to being home with LO (homeschooling a teen is an entirely different ballgame with its own pros and cons): -having the time with LO to just be- reading books, doing nap time cuddles, all the day-to-day life stuff -having flexibility to do more things with her than I could otherwise do (eg she can be involved in more activities and I can take her more places because we're not trying to do it all on weekends) -going places when it's less crowded (this makes me probably irrationally happy- crowded stores and attractions like the zoo, museum, etc, make me irritable) -having a flexible schedule both for LO and myself- (if she sleeps late, wakes early, or were in the mood for a lazy morning in our pjs, so be it)
This! Exactly! Her idea of fun is taking a basket and wearing it as a hat!
Post by starrynight14 on May 27, 2016 17:25:27 GMT -5
Thanks for all the input ladies! You'd think after being a SAHM for over 6 years that I'd have some tricks up my sleeve! I think it's just that the kids are each going through different phases and circumstances are always changing. And LO really is a handful so it sure can be exhausting.
I am PT SAH but currently on mat leave -Go to the gym, DS loves the child care -Splash pad -Playground -Play outside at home -Pool at home -Mall playground -Walmart or Target -My BFF will be out of school.for summer soon and we will get together weekly most likely. -Library toddler time
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