MOTN RandomsJul 14, 2016 15:49:15 GMT -5via mobile
Post by mahler5 on Jul 14, 2016 15:49:15 GMT -5
I should add that it took me a few weeks with C to really bond and a few months to really feel close. Once she started really smiling it was the best ever. I can't wait for E to do that.
Post by bexincanada on Jul 14, 2016 15:59:03 GMT -5
mahler5, those smiles really are the most amazing feedback - "Hey, I know you." We're just starting that phase now - at lease I think so... she pees a lot so you never know, but I think so!
CET & CAR - both 30, married Aug, 2013, together 12+ yrs.
TTC #1: CAR carrying IUI #1 & 2 - Clomid, trigger = BFN IUI #3 - Switched to Gonal 150iu. Overstim led to 'surprise' IVF. Retrieved 21, 14 mature, 13 fertilized, all 13 made it to day 5, 9 PGS normal. Transferred 1 AA hatched blast 5/1/15 Baby Girl M born 1-21-16
I should add that it took me a few weeks with C to really bond and a few months to really feel close. Once she started really smiling it was the best ever. I can't wait for E to do that.
This also makes me think of how dads sometimes have trouble bonding until kids become toddlers and interactive. It's just hard when you aren't the one that birthed them. But then suddenly it isn't. And usually genetics Aren't an issue there.
With M for me it helped to have alone time with her when I had to find ways to soothe her and we found our own rhythm.
My SO isn't biologically related (nor gave birth) to any of her kids (3) She says it is more like a dad thing in that she didn't bond quite as fiercely immediately. It took some smiles, recognition, that sort of thing. That whoosh of hormones carried me into it with mine.
My best neighbors are a couple with one kid each from the same donor. And I do find it strange that while they each love both the kids with all their hearts. Each kid tends to find their bio mom in times of stress/pain. I definitely related to it more when the littlest was still breast feeding, but it seems like its a trend that's staying. I don't know if I would see it, if I didn't know who had which kid, but it seems that way to me.
I also note that my SO seems to accept my son much more obviously and easily parent him than I do with her kids. Partly because they spend 1/2 time with the other parent, partly because they have another parent? DS does not have another parent. I wonder about that in myself. Will I ever bond completely or see myself as a step parent?
My best neighbors are a couple with one kid each from the same donor. And I do find it strange that while they each love both the kids with all their hearts. Each kid tends to find their bio mom in times of stress/pain. I definitely related to it more when the littlest was still breast feeding, but it seems like its a trend that's staying. I don't know if I would see it, if I didn't know who had which kid, but it seems that way to me.
DW isn't biologically related to the kids, but the kids have very definitive preferences for us...even at 10y. I recently found out that some of the kids' friends thought DW was G's mom and I was C's mom...nevermind they are twins. We both adore and love both kids, but they have certainly aligned with each of us (most obviously based on how our personality matches theirs.)
MOTN RandomsJul 15, 2016 13:07:59 GMT -5via mobile
Post by karlamo on Jul 15, 2016 13:07:59 GMT -5
Stringy. MW asked me if I felt different the day after I gave birth. I was so out of it and hormonal. I told her if anything my love for R is deeper than before because he taught me how to be s mother. He let me makes all my mistakes on him and L will reap the benefit of having an experienced mom. I love each the same but both hold a different piece of my heart. R was the baby a longed for and thought I'd never get and L is the baby I thought I'd never get to carry.
MOTN RandomsJul 15, 2016 13:11:15 GMT -5via mobile
Post by karlamo on Jul 15, 2016 13:11:15 GMT -5
mahler5 I bet so little has to do with genetics and feeling close and more is about you have a toddler who is demanding your attention so there's little time for bonding with baby. My connection with L blossomed over time. In the beginning I was feeling like the ring leader of a circus.
mahler5 I bet so little has to do with genetics and feeling close and more is about you have a toddler who is demanding your attention so there's little time for bonding with baby. My connection with L blossomed over time. In the beginning I was feeling like the ring leader of a circus.
Lol. I feel more like the clown everyone makes fun of that gets chased by the lion.
Not sure how many times., I hate pumping. I need to start., I have only hand expressed a few times into a bottle. I haven't got the old pump out agsin.
Ive been rethinking school options m. I'm wondering if c would be better in private setting but one reason we moved to our specific school is we though mt elementary school would be better.
Hope I can go back to sleep for few hours after e stops eating m. It's storming so maybe if sum doesn't come up that will hekp. L said she would get up with c but we will see.
Post by bexincanada on Jul 16, 2016 7:24:07 GMT -5
I hate the birds when you just want to sleep. Damn birds. We are up. Time to get ready for the marathon. I'm thinking I'll have to pump a lot. I'm pumping right now while ahe finishes off the last of the fridge supply. I need to remember to pay attention to the time when I'm there.
I need to pump today and tomorrow in order to get my day care bottles in. 6 more weeks till we can start Almond milk!! I am so looking forward to not being anxious about getting my bottles. L thinks it's funny to bite me. It's not funny, L. I remind him that he can be bottle fed....
Post by bexincanada on Jul 17, 2016 5:53:31 GMT -5
I'm so sleepy and want to get on the road home. Breakfast is at 9am. How fast can we eat and run is the question. Is did well, but dealing with fussy periods and night wakes outside of your pwn home makes regular tired extra tired. I don't know how you do it cetcar. So many poops (more than usual last night), feeds and pumps made me feel like I spent most of my time in our room anyhow.
How did night one in the crib go wittyandwaiting? That's a milestone!
bexincanada, Luckily she's been a pretty good little traveler. Sometimes it's hard when she's meeting a lot of new people and we feel like she needs to be awake and happy for them. Or her vague schedule/pattern gets thrown and she doesn't get in her longer naps. I felt that way when we were on the Cape. A lot of my beach time was spent sitting in a UPF tent holding or feeding a sleeping M or playing with her. Hope breakfast was super quick and you're on your way home! How does Is do in the car?
For the first time I think we're dealing with jet lag. Like today, she woke up at 4 and took a paci then again at 5:30, and then again at 6 where I decided to just feed her and let her doze. Typically she was sleeping straight through until 6:30-7:30.
wittyandwaiting, Her crib!? What a big kid milestone. We haven't made the transition to her own room yet but she is in her own bed but it's in our room.
CET & CAR - both 30, married Aug, 2013, together 12+ yrs.
TTC #1: CAR carrying IUI #1 & 2 - Clomid, trigger = BFN IUI #3 - Switched to Gonal 150iu. Overstim led to 'surprise' IVF. Retrieved 21, 14 mature, 13 fertilized, all 13 made it to day 5, 9 PGS normal. Transferred 1 AA hatched blast 5/1/15 Baby Girl M born 1-21-16
Post by wittyandwaiting on Jul 17, 2016 9:24:53 GMT -5
Night one in the crib was was okay, I didn't realize how creaky our rocker was until 3:30am when I got up to do a boob to crib transfer. Everything is louder at three in the morning.
I did find that I slept better because I wasn't hearing every little shuffle; O managed to shuffle herself about 90 degrees and to pee through her diaper for time ever. She's just about at the top weight for size two diapers so we're moving on to size three - maybe she's outgrown the absorbency?
Hey bexincanada, do you collect Huggies Rewards by any chance? I use Pampers but I have a Huggies code from a case of wipes (on sale at Costco). Not sure if the codes from Canada work in the US so it's yours if you want it.
I think that maybe O poops more on hot days.
(Edited to add) cetcar, we kind of had to put her in her crib. She's outgrown her bassinet which had a max weight of 15lbs and we don't have Rock'n'Plays in Canada which go up to 25lbs.
I kind of want to move her crib into our room but I don't know if I'm being too sappy or if it actually makes sense.
Post by bexincanada on Jul 17, 2016 16:30:50 GMT -5
wittyandwaiting We use Pampers but I haven't signed up since we're planning to switch to a cloth diaper service. I can PM you at least one code, I'll see if I still have others - should've thought of this sooner, she goes through all the diapers!
Also, Graco has a Pack 'n Play that has a two stage bassinet, up to 20lbs I believe. We're contemplating the purchase. Right now Is is in a bassinet.
My day was better than the MOTN post earlier. Had some good snuggles and more quiet visiting. Still exhausted and happy to be home.
Post by bexincanada on Jul 18, 2016 3:19:22 GMT -5
We've been up a bunch tonight. The usual routine was thrown out of whack. Hoping we can sleep a couple hours now though doubtful since she didn't eat much this feed.
All. The spit up. I don't even have a shirt on at this point until she can fall back to sleep cuz she keeps ruining mine. And luckily she hates having her own shirt changed. So that's been fun!
Post by wittyandwaiting on Jul 18, 2016 5:03:20 GMT -5
Oh cool, thanks bexincanada! My PNP has a bassinet but I didn't even look at the weight. I'll do that today. Sorry you're having a rough night, hopefully you can get some daytime naps in.
Stringy that sucks. O is a spitter too and I've had days (and nights) like that too. I have so many bras now because she gets sick all over them. (Gross) It's starting at get better now so I'm hoping it's on its way out.
I never in my life thought that I'd be looking at myself evaluating if it was a wearable amount of spit up or if I should change. (At home)
O went to sleep around 9pm and woke up at 2:40am and now again at 5:30am. That I can handle.
Post by bexincanada on Jul 18, 2016 6:42:32 GMT -5
Another snacky feed and a sleepy kiddo. We're heading to a friends for a little "play date" with her 3 month old this morning. I hope Is has a big feed before we go.
I should pump now... assuming she's settled for a bit. And make coffee... all the coffee is needed today.
L peed through his diaper last night at 1:30. After I changed him, he wanted to stay up and play, which I was totally on board with, *eye roll*. Anyone who says babies can't be manipulative haven't met mine. L started smiling and saying mama at 1:30 and totally sucked me in to play. He finally fell asleep at 2:30 after being on the boob, off the boob, on the boob, off the boob...
MW had to save him from himself by hugging him to her,
MOTN RandomsJul 18, 2016 22:28:04 GMT -5via mobile
Post by mahler5 on Jul 18, 2016 22:28:04 GMT -5
wittyandwaiting-- I think class size would be smaller and more likely she would be challenged. She seems really bright and ahead of kids at school. I sometimes wonder if she would get bored at a public school, especially in large class size that can't do individualized teaching as much. Also, I worry she may have some ADHD issues. I know it's too early to tell but I do and she does things occasionally that make me wonder. So, if that was the case I would want her somewhere that had a better teacher/kid ratio.
At the same time, I want her to feel normal. And sometimes public school seems better for that. Idk, I went to public school. It was fine. In some ways I think it gives you a better real world experience but I wonder if private school could have been better in my sitsution. The public schools here are decent so either way it should be good.
I'm rambling and need to go to bed before my MOTN first waking comes!
First wakeup- check. Somehow phone is never in reach. Now I'm doing the "watch her before I get comfy cuz you know she needs one more burp" thing.
Also our niece is in labor with the last cousin! (The one not technically a cousin but we will call her that). This will be the 5th girl 3 and under on my wife's side, plus my brother's two girls under 3. It's the 3rd 2016 baby girl. She should also be the last barring any oops by the straight couples.
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