Baby shower for #3

[miraclebbye]

Feb 9, 2015 21:11:03 GMT -5 shmee said:

Feb 9, 2015 20:28:40 GMT -5 Jesslfar said:

No no no.  I am trying my best to turn it into a luncheon so people don't think of it as a shower.  I really do not want baby decorations or anything that makes it sound like a gift giving even myself.  The women organizing it have sworn no games or baby shaped items.  Even with 2nd and 3rd showers being the norm here, I would be a even more mortified if I had had 2 showers in 4 years and they pulled out measure the belly type games.

What do you mean baby shaped items?

Fetus cookies?

www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://images.teamsugar.com/files/upl1/10/109609/46_2008/e7d5df934d41060e_fetal.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.popsugar.com/moms/Fetus-Cookie-Cutters-2490620&h=225&w=550&tbnid=UU3_WIRsy87gtM:&zoom=1&docid=8tJVgVNbT5K6mM&ei=PmnZVKGAAdGyoQSCqID4CQ&tbm=isch&ved=0CCwQMygPMA8

[lupineaura]

Oooohhh I've missed the gifs!

Since my fellow bitter snatches have already expressed a lot of my opinions, I'm going to try and throw out a practical solution. I mean, surely, if this is baby boy #3 and they are all 4 and under, what could she possibly need (except, I guess, diapers)? Could you suggest changing the party from a baby shower to a "freezer meals" party, where people can bring the family something they can eat/reheat/use during birth recovery and the first few weeks of caring for a newborn? Still kind of "gift grabby" but it seems less offensive to me.

Maybe I'm a bitter/jealous snatch, because for these babies I need to buy a lot of stuff (stroller, car seats, second infant seats, new twin breastfeeding pillow, second xyzzzzzz) and I've already turned down showers from my mom and sister. I'm just not a FTM.

[viola]

Feb 9, 2015 19:30:23 GMT -5 honeylemon said:

I just realized I quoted the wrong person in my excitement to post my initial MM gif.

Fail.

I knew what I said wasn't Joan worthy. 

[honeylemon]

Feb 9, 2015 21:23:39 GMT -5 viola said:

Feb 9, 2015 19:30:23 GMT -5 honeylemon said:

I just realized I quoted the wrong person in my excitement to post my initial MM gif.

Fail.

I knew what I said wasn't Joan worthy. 

It was a good response though.

[kgnordman]

Like some have said, if it's a causal event why would there be games/activities? My coworker was having her third baby, so we all chipped in a few dollars and had a pizza party and just hung out with each other. That's casual.

I'm not huge on Pinterest, but I think if you are looking there, it's far from casual.

[seventythree]

Feb 9, 2015 16:58:58 GMT -5 la79al said:

I've been around enough to know this idea does not go well. No one invited to this shower even knew the mom when she had her first 2 so everyone is excited about this baby. It is going to be a very casual event.

Maybe calling it/treating it like a shower is the problem! If people are excited and want to get together to celebrate that someone is having a baby, then I don't personally see anything wrong with that... but then just call it a party. A casual get-together with a little bit of food and good company and MAYBE MAYBE some small gifts or one gift basket or something from the group if people ABSOLUTELY feel inclined... but I'd leave the games and other traditional trappings of an actual shower behind.

[scattered]

I had two separate surprise showers last time and I wanted to die. One was from my family and one was my bible study group.

[Renarene]

I'm like the only person in the world who likes baby shower games, but I would not be attending a shower for a third baby in four years! I'm sorry that's insane to me. I have a 9 year old girl and a boy on the way. I literally had nothing for this baby because we thought we were done. I have had three people ask me multiple times to throw me a shower and I politely declined and begged them not to do a surprise one anyways.

If you guys are just looking to get together and celebrate a new baby it doesn't have to be a "shower".

[tdart14]

I hate surprise parties, showers and so on. Wether they are being thrown for me or I'm being invited.

This is my second and I've declined a shower twice now, forcefully the second time.

I also am not a fan of most games. I dislike diaper raffles, buying a day on when you think baby will be born, drawing in diapers and onsie, playing bingo whole watching gifts be opened.

Really, my favorite part is the food....

Yep, I'm that horrible.

[copilot2012]

I would do something like this:

Tired? Worn out? Need to get away for a few hours?

Great! Us too!
So tell DH or the baby sitter youre joining us for "shelly's" surprise baby shower
@ yada yada

Then byob and we will bring the soda & pizza.
Baby "xyz" is excited to hear what's new with you!

[Deleted]

Feb 9, 2015 21:08:18 GMT -5 miraclebbye said:

Feb 9, 2015 20:58:24 GMT -5 @maxandruby said:

For a 3rd baby where there is not a significant age gap, I would make this a very casual event.  I would not do much more then a diaper type party.  If she doesn't really need anything about the only thing she will need are diapers....and maybe gift cards if there is something particular she is looking for.  And really, I think a shower for a 3rd kid in 4yr is not necessary or warranted.  Take her out for dinner and a mani/pedi or just have a girls night or day or something. 

With that said, one of my friends is throwing me a shower because she wants to.  There will be a 5.5yr age gap between DS2 and this baby though and I have very few baby things left.  Because she asked if it was ok for her to throw one I gave her my opinions as to what I would like (extremely low key: 0 games preferably, casual *think jeans* dress code, etc.) and told her that while it was not necessary to throw a shower the thought was greatly appreciated and that it should be fun.  All I really want is a mingle type situation: get the friends together for chatting and drinks (of the non-alcoholic variety)...think a brunch type of thing.  I think one thing she is planning on doing is buying the packs of thin, cheap bibs and guests will decorate those.  That is about as much of a "game" as I want and it isn't even a game.  LOL

This post totally contradicts itself. You tell her its not warranted or necessary and then go on to say you are having one yourself. Or did I misinterpret?

I can understand why there may be confusion.  She came to me one day and told me that she wanted to throw me a baby shower.  I told her it was not necessary nor was it anything I expected.  She said she still wanted to do it.  Because I have manners and want to be considerate of my friend's feelings and wants, I agreed to the shower but I did request that it be really low key and casual. Do I need a baby shower?  Absolutely not.  Do I want to make a friend happy?  Absolutely. 

[Deleted]

I love how OP says try not to judge. Like she doesn't know exactly the type of response She'll get here.

[ksmith0803]

My two cents for what it's worth... I agree with the other pp that 3rd showers are tacky. However, if you're set on having one, I would forego the games. By the time she's at her third baby, she's already had showers and done the games. Just have a get together or a barbecue in her honor. I would really suggest a sip and see after the baby is born.

[JustinBobby]

Feb 10, 2015 12:26:38 GMT -5 @maxandruby said:

Feb 9, 2015 21:08:18 GMT -5 miraclebbye said:

This post totally contradicts itself. You tell her its not warranted or necessary and then go on to say you are having one yourself. Or did I misinterpret?

I can understand why there may be confusion.  She came to me one day and told me that she wanted to throw me a baby shower.  I told her it was not necessary nor was it anything I expected.  She said she still wanted to do it.  Because I have manners and want to be considerate of my friend's feelings and wants, I agreed to the shower but I did request that it be really low key and casual. Do I need a baby shower?  Absolutely not.  Do I want to make a friend happy?  Absolutely. 

So are you suggesting that if someone declines a second shower they don't have manners?

[Renarene]

Feb 10, 2015 13:12:13 GMT -5 JustinBobby said:

Feb 10, 2015 12:26:38 GMT -5 @maxandruby said:

I can understand why there may be confusion.  She came to me one day and told me that she wanted to throw me a baby shower.  I told her it was not necessary nor was it anything I expected.  She said she still wanted to do it.  Because I have manners and want to be considerate of my friend's feelings and wants, I agreed to the shower but I did request that it be really low key and casual. Do I need a baby shower?  Absolutely not.  Do I want to make a friend happy?  Absolutely. 

So are you suggesting that if someone declines a second shower they don't have manners?

I was kind of wondering the same. I mentioned in this thread that multiple people wanted to throw me a shower and I politely declined. I certainly don't think I was being a bad friend because I was denying them the pleasure of throwing me a shower!


Eta: also I hate Max and Ruby. Not the poster, but the show. Where ARE their parents?

[Deleted]

Feb 10, 2015 12:26:38 GMT -5 @maxandruby said:

Feb 9, 2015 21:08:18 GMT -5 miraclebbye said:

This post totally contradicts itself. You tell her its not warranted or necessary and then go on to say you are having one yourself. Or did I misinterpret?

I can understand why there may be confusion.  She came to me one day and told me that she wanted to throw me a baby shower.  I told her it was not necessary nor was it anything I expected.  She said she still wanted to do it.  Because I have manners and want to be considerate of my friend's feelings and wants, I agreed to the shower but I did request that it be really low key and casual. Do I need a baby shower?  Absolutely not.  Do I want to make a friend happy?  Absolutely. 

So you don't need it, but you're going to make you're guests show up and spend their money foolishly on you anyways?! I think this is ridiculous.

[rocksforludo]

Feb 10, 2015 13:45:47 GMT -5 Renarene said:

Feb 10, 2015 13:12:13 GMT -5 JustinBobby said:

So are you suggesting that if someone declines a second shower they don't have manners?

I was kind of wondering the same. I mentioned in this thread that multiple people wanted to throw me a shower and I politely declined. I certainly don't think I was being a bad friend because I was denying them the pleasure of throwing me a shower!


Eta: also I hate Max and Ruby. Not the poster, but the show. Where ARE their parents?

I'm terrible at doing things I don't want to make other people happy, but I also don't expect other people to do things for me that they don't want to.  I'd rather find something that makes us both happy. 

[miraclebbye]

Feb 10, 2015 13:12:13 GMT -5 JustinBobby said:

Feb 10, 2015 12:26:38 GMT -5 @maxandruby said:

I can understand why there may be confusion.  She came to me one day and told me that she wanted to throw me a baby shower.  I told her it was not necessary nor was it anything I expected.  She said she still wanted to do it.  Because I have manners and want to be considerate of my friend's feelings and wants, I agreed to the shower but I did request that it be really low key and casual. Do I need a baby shower?  Absolutely not.  Do I want to make a friend happy?  Absolutely. 

So are you suggesting that if someone declines a second shower they don't have manners?

Well I guess that means I have none because I declined 2 of my friends.

[beezybaby]

Ok, I actually had a baby shower thrown for me for this baby, #3. I protested it, tried to ask for a girls night out type thing instead, but, the hostess really wanted to do a shower, so there it was. It was awesome. I had moved to Atlanta just after DD2 was born, and had to move in the middle of this pregnancy too. So my friend just wanted to show some love for me and this baby before I moved somewhere where I know literally no one. That's my disclaimer.

Anyway, she had this fun little game with nursery rhyme trivia. it was not embarrassing, silly, or any of those things. We also did a think where each girl was given a sheet that said I hope "baby"....learns____, loves _____, fears _____...etc... It was so personal, perfect for our small group gathering, and something that I can't wait to put in his baby book. So, there you go. Two ideas from a BTDT 3rd baby shower veteran.

[lgsdesigner]

I am extremely against this.
That being said-- this is all I can think of that would be deemed "appropriate": 

[snapdragon]

Feb 10, 2015 14:23:21 GMT -5 lgsdesigner said:

I am extremely against this.
That being said-- this is all I can think of that would be deemed "appropriate": 

Where.  Where can I get these.

[freddyisready]

Feb 10, 2015 12:57:02 GMT -5 ksmith0803 said:

My two cents for what it's worth... I agree with the other pp that 3rd showers are tacky. However, if you're set on having one, I would forego the games. By the time she's at her third baby, she's already had showers and done the games. Just have a get together or a barbecue in her honor. I would really suggest a sip and see after the baby is born.

This

[lgsdesigner]

Feb 10, 2015 14:50:03 GMT -5 snapdragon said:

Feb 10, 2015 14:23:21 GMT -5 lgsdesigner said:

I am extremely against this.
That being said-- this is all I can think of that would be deemed "appropriate": 

Where.  Where can I get these.

snapdragon - From Etsy. I can't remember the sellers name but they are on there somewhere.