So this afternoon while outside with DD two big dogs come charging towards us. DD screams (she loves dogs, just from a distance). Without thinking I grab her and start moving quickly into our house. It was only after I was inside that I realized "oh shit" since I'm only 2 weeks post c section. Luckily I'm only a little sore. The dogs are probably harmless but their barks were super scary!
Post by frodabaggins on Sept 9, 2016 18:18:48 GMT -5
Hi and hugs to all going through a no-sleep stage! This is going to sound really dumb, but I honestly can't remember how I did this the first time around with DS - I need to start pumping, so that I can leave DD with my hubs if I need to, and so she can start getting used to bottles (going to daycare at 12 weeks.) how do I do this...pump after I feed her? Pump at certain times during the day?
Did anyone do the 2-3-4 nap schedule with your older kids? I feel like she is settling into that pattern already, but at only 7 weeks old doesn't she need more sleep than that?
Did anyone do the 2-3-4 nap schedule with your older kids? I feel like she is settling into that pattern already, but at only 7 weeks old doesn't she need more sleep than that?
DD1 did a variant on it starting at 6.5 mo. I have known one baby IRL who did 2 naps starting very young. They were quite long naps.
Did anyone do the 2-3-4 nap schedule with your older kids? I feel like she is settling into that pattern already, but at only 7 weeks old doesn't she need more sleep than that?
Yes, but it happened naturally (with encouragement) around 3 months
Hi and hugs to all going through a no-sleep stage! This is going to sound really dumb, but I honestly can't remember how I did this the first time around with DS - I need to start pumping, so that I can leave DD with my hubs if I need to, and so she can start getting used to bottles (going to daycare at 12 weeks.) how do I do this...pump after I feed her? Pump at certain times during the day?
I would pump first thing in the morning bc that's usually a time when there is extra milk in your breast, and at roughly the same time each day.
Post by countrycotton on Sept 9, 2016 20:08:47 GMT -5
R smiled at me today! I wasn't sure it wasn't just gas so I kept taking and smiling at her and a minute later she gave me an even bigger smile. Definitely a social smile!! DH was holding her while I cooked dinner and he suddenly turned toward me and said "She smiled!! She smiled AT me!!" I wasn't expecting this for at least another week, it really makes it all worth while!!
Post by coffeequeen14 on Sept 9, 2016 20:54:36 GMT -5
We are spending the weekend at a resort a few hours away. Of course today (during a three hour car trip) was DDs first day of being more awake. Yeah for a super fun car ride 😉
We are spending the weekend at a resort a few hours away. Of course today (during a three hour car trip) was DDs first day of being more awake. Yeah for a super fun car ride 😉
Oh no about car ride! Hope that the weekend is fun.
MH is all miserable because B kept interrupting him when he was telling me a forever long story. She's 3... I talked to her about it for a while and she apologized to him.
He took her up to bed a bit more than an hour later and I went up to say goodnight and she asked me to read to her. I asked her if daddy read to her "no he said he didn't want to". I asked him and he told me he's mad at her for what happened earlier and told her he didn't want to read to her.
MH is all miserable because B kept interrupting him when he was telling me a forever long story. She's 3... I talked to her about it for a while and she apologized to him.
He took her up to bed a bit more than an hour later and I went up to say goodnight and she asked me to read to her. I asked her if daddy read to her "no he said he didn't want to". I asked him and he told me he's mad at her for what happened earlier and told her he didn't want to read to her.
Umm WTAF?! Cue us fighting tonight.
I'm sorry. DH and I had a similar fight today..they seem to forget these toddlers are just that toddlers!
MH is all miserable because B kept interrupting him when he was telling me a forever long story. She's 3... I talked to her about it for a while and she apologized to him.
He took her up to bed a bit more than an hour later and I went up to say goodnight and she asked me to read to her. I asked her if daddy read to her "no he said he didn't want to". I asked him and he told me he's mad at her for what happened earlier and told her he didn't want to read to her.
Umm WTAF?! Cue us fighting tonight.
Dude, I sympathize. My H will be telling me a story and our two year old will walk up wanting something from one of us and super innocently ask, and my H gets all irritated - "Daddys talking, let Daddy finish" - and runs out of patience really fast. I'm like, he's two. He doesn't get it.
MH is all miserable because B kept interrupting him when he was telling me a forever long story. She's 3... I talked to her about it for a while and she apologized to him.
He took her up to bed a bit more than an hour later and I went up to say goodnight and she asked me to read to her. I asked her if daddy read to her "no he said he didn't want to". I asked him and he told me he's mad at her for what happened earlier and told her he didn't want to read to her.
Umm WTAF?! Cue us fighting tonight.
Dude, I sympathize. My H will be telling me a story and our two year old will walk up wanting something from one of us and super innocently ask, and my H gets all irritated - "Daddys talking, let Daddy finish" - and runs out of patience really fast. I'm like, he's two. He doesn't get it.
I tried explaining to him that her little brain thinks something and it just comes out of her mouth. Everything is so exciting to her and her first instinct is "mama!..." A 3 year old can't wait for 10 minutes for you to finish your story, at least mine can't.
He just came down and apologized.
I think we're both just so tired right now and he tends to explode when he's overwhelmed, and I tend to back away. We're such opposites in that aspect, I'm usually super open but shut down when it's too much. He's usually really reserved and then boom.
This 6 week fussiness is brutal. I guess DD has developed witching hours because the past few nights she's been a screaming bloody murder mess from 7-10pm. I went to watch some of my students play at a football game so this was H's first time handling it on his own. I came home and he seemed so defeated. I feel kinda bad. He wouldn't really accept my reassurance that she's a baby and sometimes she's just going to scream and you can't fix it all.
My sister got here this morning and it has been a glorious, if tired, day. She was happy to sit on the couch with the baby and watch the toddler play while I spent a few hours helping SO with some work and running errands. She even made us all lunch! First actual hot meal I have had in a while.
Then she introduced me to Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, the tv show, which was kinda hilarious, and we binged on that all afternoon. Then we went grocery shopping with both kids, and my ebt funds came through (praise whoever gets praise for that!) so I could finally buy stuff like jelly... meat... fruit snacks for my kiddo... omg I have actual variety of foods in my kitchen again.
And THEN superwoman... I mean, my sister, gave toddler a bath while I snarfed a dinner-snack and fed the baby, and now I am in bed sandwiched between my kids. I have a headache but they are both asleep and I am so so ready to be right behind them. And the best thing is, I get my sister for almost 2 weeks. Yesssssss.......
Tomorrow, we are going to visit the quilt show in town with my mom, which, while not my hobby, is fun to see all the finished pieces. They are all artwork, after all. And it gets the kiddos out of the house.
Post by coffeequeen14 on Sept 10, 2016 0:48:54 GMT -5
I also get super irritated at H when he doesn't pay attention to the kids when they're telling a story about something super exciting or if they ask for help and he ignores then. I know he doesn't mean to but it makes me so mad. He typically is looking at his phone when that happens😔
The kids are having a blast at the resortl. They got to make ice dream today by shaking the ingredients in a bag of ice. They loved it.
DD is sleeping sans rocknplay for the first time since the hospital and has given me 3 hours straight. Hooray!!
Post by coffeequeen14 on Sept 10, 2016 3:00:14 GMT -5
EllieT that is super tough. I'm sorry you're having to deal with that.
I'm not sure if you want hugs or advice so first, hugs! I hope you get the sleep you need tonight/tomorrow.
If you want advice (ignore if you don't!) I'd tell H that it won't be like this for long. That some people refer to the first three months as the fourth trimester, where baby still wants to be snuggles, cuddled and warm despite being on the outside. I'd also use very specific statements like "I need you to hold him while I shower because if I put him down he will fuss and he is too young to just cry it out." Or "I need you to hold him for an hour so I can sleep because I'm losing my mind without sleep. If I hear him fuss I can't sleep so please hold him in another room."
I realized so many things I knew from babysitting growing up, reading on here, etc H does not know. I dumb it down for him and give him very specific instructions with rationale so he doesn't have the chance to think he knows better lol
And for you, it gets better:) you had nine months getting used to the idea of a baby and making sacrifices and adjustments to your life and behavior. I find sometimes it takes men some time with an outside baby to get used to the idea and learn to adjust as well.
shanny Is this an expected complication? Will it set him back for recovery? In sorry:(
How are you guys holding up? As in you and H
Thrush ain't no thang, it's just gross, haha. We are okay, just getting eager to know when we can go back home. We were able to get a room at the Ronald McDonald House here (I remember one of the NICU moms on here got to stay at one too. kokopelli I think?). That has been such a blessing because this particular RMH is inside the hospital so I have been able to see R a lot. The most I go without seeing him is six hours at night, but I'm still pumping during that time, haha.
There is a two week old baby here who has pulmonary atresia and originally, yesterday they were going to do a catheter on him to keep his PDA open. His parents told me the doctors decided it was too risky and he is being transferred tomorrow to Stanford because he will need a heart transplant and Stanford can get him one faster. It is hard to be here and hear about even more dire circumstances than our own...like a little four year old girl with Leukemia. Her family's efforts to find a bone marrow match were fruitless, so she is in a clinical trial to use her mom's stem cells, even though they are a 5/10 match (less than ideal).
coffeequeen14 Ditto about H not knowing the baby basics through experience from before. Also, definitely not surprising that your H won't read the baby books. I found that H learned best when I modeled behavior and even so, needed lots of positive reinforcement to learn. Unfortunately, if he senses that you are negative about the way he does things or don't trust him with baby, depending on his personality, he may just shut down and expect you to do everything.
In a lot of ways, I got lucky with SO. He is the one with practical baby knowledge. I learned so much with DD1 from him. He managed to caolm DD2's worst crying last night when I had no idea what was wrong. The rough part for me is that he is so rarely around during the kids' awake hours. But at least he is only downstairs, and if I send up smoke sifnals, he comes to help me for a few minutes.
I feel for you guys with oblivious DH's. I hope they all actually mean well and are just sleep deprived, too!
I'm glad he is doing well, shanny! That would be so tough to see the other kiddos that are so sick.
Hugs, EllieT. I hope it gets better. DH needs everything spelled out clearly too. We are on our third kid, and even last night DD3 was fussing for DH. I picked her up and she stopped and he said jokingly "See, she likes you better!" No, it's because I'm standing up and bouncing/swaying, which she prefers when she is fussing. And he said "Oh, I could have done that." It just didn't even occur to him (3rd time around! Hello, same as our other kids..).
shanny yup it was me! It was a huge blessing for us too. The other sick family's just broke my heart. I felt bad because I just had a premie, otherwise she was healthy. I'm glad it is allowing you to see R a lot! Sorry about the thrush. That is no fun
EllieT I'm sorry that DH is being so difficult. I will say eventually they get it..and are much better the 2nd time around. DH was like that with our first until she was 12 weeks and I went back to work. He was home with her all day without me being there and then just got it. He said after that first weekend I worked he finally felt like he understood her needs.
WTAF to being "mad" at a 3 year old?? And telling her he didn't want to read with her, that breaks my heart
I know. I was soooo pissed. I don't remember the last time I got that angry at him. I was so sad for her. I could tell when he came down and apologized he felt really bad about it.
Hi and hugs to all going through a no-sleep stage! This is going to sound really dumb, but I honestly can't remember how I did this the first time around with DS - I need to start pumping, so that I can leave DD with my hubs if I need to, and so she can start getting used to bottles (going to daycare at 12 weeks.) how do I do this...pump after I feed her? Pump at certain times during the day?
I've been pumping twice a day: once after the morning feeding and once after the kid goes to sleep. The morning pumping is more substantial (4-5 oz) and goes straight into the freezer for my stash. The evening one is around 3 oz and goes in the fridge for my Sweetie to give at the first wake-up. The idea for me is to do it right after a feed, so that there's plenty of time to "refill" for when the LO needs to nurse. Not that you ever really get empty, but whatever.
But I think I may have more milk than average. I pretty regularly spray milk on anything near me. My kid is sticky a lot. I think I'll never forget the sight of milk beaded up in his eyebrows....
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