Morning! We had a good night. Everyone is dressed, fed, brushed and combed and ready to leave for school EARLY. I think I shall reward myself with a latte.
Post by bocaburger on Sept 13, 2016 7:55:07 GMT -5
I got a 3 hour stretch and a 3.5 hour stretch of sleep last night! I feel great!
We hired a babysitter/mother's helper to be here while H is in class. She starts today. I'm nervous about it because it's not a typical arrangement - I will be home most of the time that she's here, but I wanted an extra set of hands because it's so hard to be alone with two newborns. It makes me feel like I'm not a real SAHM. And it's a lot of money to spend. And there will be a stranger in my space.
I got a 3 hour stretch and a 3.5 hour stretch of sleep last night! I feel great!
We hired a babysitter/mother's helper to be here while H is in class. She starts today. I'm nervous about it because it's not a typical arrangement - I will be home most of the time that she's here, but I wanted an extra set of hands because it's so hard to be alone with two newborns. It makes me feel like I'm not a real SAHM. And it's a lot of money to spend. And there will be a stranger in my space.
A mothers helper will not make you less of a "real" sahm. I have a lot of local family so when I need extra hands I call them over, same thing in my eyes.
And a stranger is only a stranger untill they become a friend. Your best friend was once a stranger!
I got a 3 hour stretch and a 3.5 hour stretch of sleep last night! I feel great!
We hired a babysitter/mother's helper to be here while H is in class. She starts today. I'm nervous about it because it's not a typical arrangement - I will be home most of the time that she's here, but I wanted an extra set of hands because it's so hard to be alone with two newborns. It makes me feel like I'm not a real SAHM. And it's a lot of money to spend. And there will be a stranger in my space.
Our nanny is here still while I'm on maternity leave. And it is awesome, even though we hate spending the money while I make nothing (I don't qualify for STDisability or paid vacation because I only work 20 hours/week).
Our nanny was recommended to us because she was once a mother's helper to a friend who had four kids at the time (the family now has 6). Whose to judge how any given family gets through a day? We all never know the capacities and struggles of any given set of people unless they tell us. Even then, you can't totally know.
Post by bocaburger on Sept 13, 2016 8:34:02 GMT -5
Thanks everyone. I appreciate the validation. I guess since I don't have a job I feel like my only "thing" is being a mom, and I just really want to feel like I'm good at that.
Today is my aunt's funeral. She died suddenly but not unexepectedly on Friday. Logistics have turned to a bit of a nightmare as Obama is giving a speech two blocks from my house at 2pm. Roads are already closed. But we'll make it work. The nuns want to see the baby! (My aunt was a nun).
Post by youdontsay on Sept 13, 2016 8:55:16 GMT -5
bocaburger don't feel ashamed! I don't know how you do it with two newborns without help so good for you for getting help! You're doing an awesome job!!!! I love how @sueposa put it, executives have assistants, so this is your assistant!
I've been MIA but have been lurking! I miss interacting with you guys and I'm going to try to at least twice a day! This is such a supportive group and I enjoy reading everything!
Nothing much going on here, Friday we all went to hummingbird125's house to meet her DS and O. M. G. he is so adorable!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Saturday MH applied for a ton of jobs since he's going to be laid off the end of next month. He has an interview Friday and it'll pay enough that we can stay in Connecticut for now.
Sunday my parents came over and we kind of kicked around the subject of us moving in with them when they move to Tennessee. MH was doing yard work and obviously avoiding socializing with my parents so we're having a family meeting on Sunday and see what we're going to do. I hate being a burden on my parents but to save money hand over fist since we won't have to pay for day care and a mortgage makes it seem so much more enticing. But, it's Tennessee, I've been a New Englander my whole life!
I also hate figuring out logistics (when would I put my house on the market, where would we put stuff in storage, etc) so this is giving me a headache thinking about it!
I suspect the baby may have a mild case of torticollis. I know it's not an emergency, but I can't decide if I should take him into the pedi today (there are plenty of open appts) or wait until I find a pedi out east and bring it up at his 2month appt. I may be overthinking due to lack of sleep.
I suspected the same for my baby and asked the pedi. She said turn her head side to side when sleeping (which is kind of a 'ha' thing because everyone knows babies turn their heads back), rotate her 180 degrees on the changing pad and in the crib to make sure the interesting stuff (lights and shadows) are on all sides, and gently stretch her. I'm sure if you google for it plenty of OTs and PTs have videos of the stretches on their blogs. There is an absolute wealth of pediatric OT and PT stuff on the Internet - my older two had gross motor delays so I've looked into it.
Thanks everyone! It's okay. She was 85 (my dad is much younger than his older siblings), was an awesome nun, and had lived a very good life. She was diagnosed with breast cancer last year; doctors told her that it spread this year. She refused chemo and opted for radiation. But, it was always a matter of time.
My paternal grandmother and now both my paternal aunts have had breast cancer; both aunts died of breast cancer while my grandmother was taken by a stroke before the cancer could. I'm going to discuss getting the BRCA testing at my 6 week follow up. I want to know what could await me. I want my sister to get tested, too, but I'm clearly more motivated than her right now.
bocaburger, my friend with twins hired a mother's helper too.
DD2 caught the cold DD1 had. She was up a lot last night and her nose won't stop running. I really hope the baby doesn't get it.
I bought another stroller that was on clearance. I may have a stroller problem.. I currently have 5. But as the baby grows, I can start getting rid of some, they all have different purposes (how I justify it to myself).
Post by bocaburger on Sept 13, 2016 10:31:28 GMT -5
So after an hour and a half together I left the babysitter to walk a few blocks to get some coffee. My mom happened to call right then and when she found out I left her alone with the babies she freaked out. She basically said that's how shaken baby syndrome happens, that I shouldn't leave her alone with both of them until I've really gotten to know her and how she reacts to stress. So now I'm totally freaking out.
I suspect the baby may have a mild case of torticollis. I know it's not an emergency, but I can't decide if I should take him into the pedi today (there are plenty of open appts) or wait until I find a pedi out east and bring it up at his 2month appt. I may be overthinking due to lack of sleep.
Since the pedi may want you to start physical therapy and it'd be a pain to switch mid treatment, maybe wait until back east. But look up stretches on line and do them on your own.
Post by bocaburger on Sept 13, 2016 11:10:02 GMT -5
Well I bought the coffee and because I was anxious I got a donut (oops) and ran home. Everything is totally fine, one baby is napping and she's rocking the other. She's really quite sweet with them.
I'm upset at my mom for freaking me out. This babysitter used to be an au pair for a newborn and an older baby, and the family gave her a good recommendation. She's sweet and gentle. She made me feel like an irresponsible mom who was putting my kids in danger so I could get coffee.
Post by youdontsay on Sept 13, 2016 11:14:41 GMT -5
bocaburger my mom pulled the same thing this weekend. We were talking about a potential job for MH where I work and it would be nights so we would need a babysitter for only the time we're commuting. She was freaking out and offered to pay for us to have cameras installed in the house. I'm like "I got it mom". Just yes her to death and do what feels right for you
Well I bought the coffee and because I was anxious I got a donut (oops) and ran home. Everything is totally fine, one baby is napping and she's rocking the other. She's really quite sweet with them.
I'm upset at my mom for freaking me out. This babysitter used to be an au pair for a newborn and an older baby, and the family gave her a good recommendation. She's sweet and gentle. She made me feel like an irresponsible mom who was putting my kids in danger so I could get coffee.
My mom did this to me when we hired our nanny. My mom was a full-time SAHM and was really down on me working PT. Fast forward a year to when it was clear to everyone how positive an impact our nanny had on DD1 and my mom was busy singing the nanny's praises to the sky. I know my mom (and yours) are not the only Grandmas to do this. It's really unhelpful and I'm sorry you had to deal with it. Go with your own mom gut.
Post by redhead610 on Sept 13, 2016 11:38:56 GMT -5
Good afternoon! Ds2 slept horribly last night. DH is away for business so I was on my own. We have lucked out that he's been a fairly good sleeper so far and have always split the night feedings, so being up all night really has me dragging today! He also ate soo much yesterday, like 6 oz more than usual, so I thought maybe he'd sleep but I was very wrong.
Dropped ds1 off at preschool and then went for a walk and did some work in my office with ds2. I am hoping ds1 naps some or at least rests and ds2 let's me rest a little.
My mom is coming over later to help with dinner, baths, and bedtime. Too bad she can't help overnight with all the wake ups!
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