Daycare thread

[spicysalmonroll]

I know some of us are nearing the go back to work date, and some already have.

I can't be the only one absolutely terrified that DS is going to forget who I am, right?! I mean he will see me for 2 hours each evening and that's it, while he'll see her for 9 hours a day. That scares me so much!
I find it even harder because I've only breastfed, so I don't have experience letting DH or grandma or anyone else feed him. I don't want to lose that bond we have made

Who else is going through this... or has with previous kids? Anything that helps make it easier to get over?

[coffeequeen14]

spicysalmonroll I promise he won't forget you!!!

S1 and I have a fantastic bond and he was in daycare from 3 months to 3.5 years. He is super smart and very well adjusted.

Remember, it is truly about quality time versus quantity of time.

My biggest suggestions:
Plan your week in advance
Establish a routine
Share responsibilities with your SO
Plan for work sick days (sorry but it's true)

[elm1214]

Hugs! I went through this with DD1 and it was tough to work through all my feelings. He definitely won't forget you!

Try to prepare everything you can the night before, so it's less to do in the morning. It takes a little while to get in a groove, but it does get easier.

[spicysalmonroll]

Sept 19, 2016 10:19:52 GMT -5 elm1214 said:

Hugs! I went through this with DD1 and it was tough to work through all my feelings. He definitely won't forget you!

Try to prepare everything you can the night before, so it's less to do in the morning. It takes a little while to get in a groove, but it does get easier.

oh yea speaking of getting in a groove... his sleep is still so erratic right now. Sometimes wakes up at 5am, sometimes 6, sometimes 7. So I'm like shit that's going to suck if I have to wake him to feed him and get going. I hate to wake him you know?!

[elm1214]

Sept 19, 2016 10:39:35 GMT -5 spicysalmonroll said:

Sept 19, 2016 10:19:52 GMT -5 elm1214 said:

Hugs! I went through this with DD1 and it was tough to work through all my feelings. He definitely won't forget you!

Try to prepare everything you can the night before, so it's less to do in the morning. It takes a little while to get in a groove, but it does get easier.

oh yea speaking of getting in a groove... his sleep is still so erratic right now. Sometimes wakes up at 5am, sometimes 6, sometimes 7. So I'm like shit that's going to suck if I have to wake him to feed him and get going. I hate to wake him you know?!

Yes that was one of the hard things, having to wake her. But I think it did help her fall into sort of a "schedule", so that was one benefit of it.

[meagpt22]

Sept 19, 2016 10:53:09 GMT -5 elm1214 said:

Sept 19, 2016 10:39:35 GMT -5 spicysalmonroll said:

oh yea speaking of getting in a groove... his sleep is still so erratic right now. Sometimes wakes up at 5am, sometimes 6, sometimes 7. So I'm like shit that's going to suck if I have to wake him to feed him and get going. I hate to wake him you know?!

Yes that was one of the hard things, having to wake her. But I think it did help her fall into sort of a "schedule", so that was one benefit of it.

Agreed that it helped establish a "schedule". In the beginning we had to wake her up to eat/get ready. Then that became her new wake up time.

Also echo it's about the quality/quantity of time. I will say the pick ups are the best! Especially when they learn to walk/run to you. Even at 12 weeks DD lit up when I picked her up. The evenings were stressful..but once we developed a new normal and routine it got better. No advice on breastfeeding and those fears bc DD was FF, this time I'm nervous about the pumping/breastfeeding fears.

[hannahbear]

I'm having a lot of anxiety - mostly because I have totally dropped the ball on this. I don't have a day care or nanny or anything lined up and it's probably too late and ohhhhhh mah gah.

[coffeequeen14]

I BF and thus pumped with both boys until they were a year. I BF S2 three months longer but stopped pumping at work. Happy to answe questions! Perhaps should we make a pumping at work thread?

My suggestions:
Pump in the car on the way to and from work! I know this sounds ridiculous but it helped me to get more pump time in without sacrificing time at work

If you take public transportation, keep your hand pump in your work bag because you never know when the metro will close and you'll be stuck hours without a pump!

Have two sets of flanges so you don't have to do as many dishes in the work week

[spicysalmonroll]

Sept 19, 2016 11:39:59 GMT -5 coffeequeen14 said:

I BF and thus pumped with both boys until they were a year. I BF S2 three months longer but stopped pumping at work. Happy to answe questions! Perhaps should we make a pumping at work thread?

My suggestions:
Pump in the car on the way to and from work! I know this sounds ridiculous but it helped me to get more pump time in without sacrificing time at work

If you take public transportation, keep your hand pump in your work bag because you never know when the metro will close and you'll be stuck hours without a pump!

Have two sets of flanges so you don't have to do as many dishes in the work week

oh I love any excuse to procrastinate at work so I fully intend to put a sign on my closed door 3-4 times a day hahaha

[meagpt22]

coffeequeen14 in the car did you just put a cover over yourself so people couldn't see everything?

[coffeequeen14]

Sept 19, 2016 17:00:30 GMT -5 meagpt22 said:

coffeequeen14 in the car did you just put a cover over yourself so people couldn't see everything?

Yes. I carried a spare set of clothes just in case but it made pumping enough milk a lot easier.

I just simply wouldnt have had enough time at work and would have had to stay longer to pump.

[quirks]

We started daycare today. I cried on the drive there, but once I dropped her off and saw they were expecting her and were ready and excited for her, I felt better.

There was a lot of stuff to drop off the first day so I asked H to come with me. I also stopped in on my lunch break and she was sound asleep and comfy.

We have a good bedtime routine and morning routine which I think is really important. I also get whatever I can ready ahead of time.

I was a little nervous about DD having less time with me, but it makes my time with her feel more precious. I was excited to go pick her up and see her

[frodabaggins]

I completely understand. I went through this exact process with DS, back when he was starting daycare in November 2014. I still have the following reddit thread saved on my phone because it helped me so much:

m.reddit.com/r/Parenting/comments/1q0w6d/my_baby_boy_is_at_daycare_for_10_hours_a_day_does/?utm_source=mweb_redirect&compact=true

I have an incredibly strong bond with my son but it was definitely hard to get used to the idea that he was spending 6-7 hours with someone other than me and my husband, and that I was spending about 10 hours away from him daily. I made up for it by being stuck to him both weekend days, and I made our mornings and evenings together as special as possible.

When he was about five months old I came home and realized that every day he smelled so strongly of his primary daycare lady's perfume. I was sobbing with guilt and sadness, and then my husband, ever the pragmatic soul, suggested I just buy the same perfume. I immediately did and felt way better :-)

[katelm]

I am sad about going back to work in 3.5 weeks I am at least thankful that C will be at our company's on-site daycare. I hope to nurse during lunch or at least visit if nursing isn't reliable (still working through issues). They always know mom

[katelm]

Sorry if that's short, typing with left hand and holding baby in other at 3am so it's all I could manage to get out haha

[hashbrownnofilter]

When I went back to work after having DS, some of my students overheard a coworker telling me that her grandson didn't bond with her daughter because she was a working mom (this was on my first day back to work). A group of like 10 kids came to me together to tell me how much they loved their working moms, and how being in daycare didn't change that at all. It was so sweet, and it reassured me more than hearing it from any adult.

Edit: my brain isn't working.

[meagpt22]

Sept 20, 2016 8:29:01 GMT -5 hashbrownnofilter said:

When I went back to work after having DS, some of my students overheard a coworker telling me that her grandson didn't bond with her daughter because she was a working mom (this was on my first day back to work). A group of like 10 kids came to me together to tell me how much they loved their working moms, and how being in daycare didn't change that at all. It was so sweet, and it reassured me more than hearing it from any adult.

Edit: my brain isn't working.

That was great of your students. My mom was a single working parent, I loved my mom but still loved my babysitters/daycare teacher. I still remember my first daycare teacher. I like to think of them as extra people to love your child. I do feel like DDs daycare teachers care deeply about her. When I had DS they were all excited to know what we were had (team green) and the director even gave us a gift. And we're at a center not even someone's house. Makes me feel better knowing my kids spend most of their waking hours there.

[hrushka]

Sept 20, 2016 2:04:46 GMT -5 katelm said:

I am sad about going back to work in 3.5 weeks I am at least thankful that C will be at our company's on-site daycare. I hope to nurse during lunch or at least visit if nursing isn't reliable (still working through issues). They always know mom

That's so nice that your work has a daycare. I wish more companies offered this.

[coffeequeen14]

hashbrownnofilter you CW sounds like a judgey jerk. Your students rock.

I asked my son if he wanted me to quit working and stay home. He said no:(

[hashbrownnofilter]

Sept 20, 2016 9:56:31 GMT -5 coffeequeen14 said:

hashbrownnofilter you CW sounds like a judgey jerk. Your students rock.

I asked my son if he wanted me to quit working and stay home. He said no:(

She also told me when I had the CVS that I was going against God because He only makes perfect babies. She's a peach.