Intro
Sept 25, 2016 18:40:02 GMT -5
Post by skywalker8813 on Sept 25, 2016 18:40:02 GMT -5
Hi everyone!
I'm a long-time lurker of TD and TCF with a few posts. Got my start with Aug13 BMB, and I have the most amazing 3yo little boy. I saw this board mentioned in another thread. Anywho, I am currently wading through an unexpected, and turned-bitter divorce (We've been married for 6 years and together for 12). Long story short, my H convinced me I was awful and made him so unhappy that he wanted to divorce in an effort to hide his adultery with a mutual friend (his employee). He also closed the joint account and left us with nothing for about a month.
I took what seemed like all the right steps since this all started, and I've started to see a therapist as well as communicate with my GP about the situation. I am doing everything I can to keep it together and be there for my son, but I feel like I am drowning. Most days, I don't even feel like getting out of bed, but it's not an option being alone with a toddler and having a full-time job. Some days I feel like everything is going to be okay, and out of no where, I'm overcome with sadness and despair thinking about the text messages I saw, what they did in my bed, the fact that he had such little regard for me whatsoever and hurt and disrespected me this much. I'm embarrassed showing my face in places we both used to frequent, as if I was the one who did something wrong. I mostly just cannot figure out why I wasn't enough, or at least respected enough to figure out our issues before he turned to someone else.
I don't know what I expect from this post. I'm in a really low place and it does feel like I release a little more of it the more I talk about it. Thanks in advance if you made it through this post.
I'm a long-time lurker of TD and TCF with a few posts. Got my start with Aug13 BMB, and I have the most amazing 3yo little boy. I saw this board mentioned in another thread. Anywho, I am currently wading through an unexpected, and turned-bitter divorce (We've been married for 6 years and together for 12). Long story short, my H convinced me I was awful and made him so unhappy that he wanted to divorce in an effort to hide his adultery with a mutual friend (his employee). He also closed the joint account and left us with nothing for about a month.
I took what seemed like all the right steps since this all started, and I've started to see a therapist as well as communicate with my GP about the situation. I am doing everything I can to keep it together and be there for my son, but I feel like I am drowning. Most days, I don't even feel like getting out of bed, but it's not an option being alone with a toddler and having a full-time job. Some days I feel like everything is going to be okay, and out of no where, I'm overcome with sadness and despair thinking about the text messages I saw, what they did in my bed, the fact that he had such little regard for me whatsoever and hurt and disrespected me this much. I'm embarrassed showing my face in places we both used to frequent, as if I was the one who did something wrong. I mostly just cannot figure out why I wasn't enough, or at least respected enough to figure out our issues before he turned to someone else.
I don't know what I expect from this post. I'm in a really low place and it does feel like I release a little more of it the more I talk about it. Thanks in advance if you made it through this post.