Rosh Hashanah/Yom Kippur

[bocaburger]

Looking for some advice about the upcoming holidays. I have never not been to services for the High Holy Days but I can't figure out the logistics of how to make it work.

The services last most of the day. Even if I just went for part of it I would be gone for at least a few hours. H works for the synagogue so he is required to be there the whole time and won't be available to help with the babies. We will have some family visiting but I don't feel comfortable asking them to miss a lot of the service.

We can hire our babysitter but I don't feel comfortable enough yet to leave both babies with her for that long (she's just starting this week). We could also hire her to come with us to services if she's willing, but I don't know if there will be a good space for her to take the babies if they are noisy.

I BF so I would either need to leave services to feed, or bring bottles but I don't know if I can find a space to pump.

It seems logistically just way too complicated but I would be so sad to be stuck at home for the whole holiday. The synagogue does livestream their services but it's obviously not the same (and I normally don't use my computer on the holidays).

Does anyone see a solution I'm not seeing?

[gratefulgirl]

I'm not Jewish, but does your synagogue not have a nursery and/or nursing mother's room? My church has both. I can take DD3 there to eat or if she's fussy. Yeah, I end up missing a lot of the service that way. It's rather more like I'm there for the practice of being there with young kids and the principal of the thing than to really participate. But I found that the earlier I started the easier the future became, if that makes sense.

I hope you find a way to participate that works for you!

[hannahbear]

Do they have a tot Shabbat type service, or family service? Or a cry room / family room?

I also think it's not unreasonable to ask some of your family to take turns and/or bring the mothers helper!

I'm planning to take turns with my sister.

Oh - are you going to fast on Yom Kippur? I'm nervous for what dehydration will so to my milk supply

[bocaburger]

The synagogue does have a family room for nursing etc but unfortunately our service is in a different location this year and I don't know if there will be a space available.

hannahbear I am definitely not fasting. Feeding my babies is too important and I can't safely do it while fasting or take a full day off without risking my supply. I think God will understand.

[hannahbear]

That's how I'm feeling, too - though a bunch of people have told me they fasted. Still, I've had supply issues and I don't want to risk it. Maybe I'll try to keep it to simple foods and nothing too extravagant.

[blueinred]

bocaburger and hannahbear, DD was born in August and I didn't fast that Yom Kippur because of nursing ( really pumping) and I don't plan to fast this time. I consider needing to feed your child to be a legitimate medical reason not to fast.

I would attend a family service with either a family member or your mother's helper and see how it goes. I would stay near an aisle so you can walk out if necessary without disturbing people.

[dc2london]

Can you hire a gentile sitter to help out? I have done that before so a friend could focus on the services

[frodabaggins]

I would probably ask the babysitter to come with you to services, but you've described that there isn't a good place to take the babies if they get noisy, and also nowhere to pump, so I see how that could be difficult. Our shul has a courtyard, social hall, preschool - any places like that you could have as your home base?

I'm keeping DS in daycare and bringing DD with us to synagogue, and just seeing how we do. Also not going to fast on YK due to breastfeeding.

How about dinner on both days of RH, anyone have plans for those, menu-wise?