Indpendence

[aydee]

I'm curious what skills your Feb13 kids are able to do independently and what types of things your kids still need help with.

I've recently lost patience with my kids relying on us to do basic tasks for them still. They routinely play and run around while we're trying to dress them, bathe them, etc.. and it's starting to drive me crazy. Everything feels like such a struggle and I no it doesn't still need to be this difficult. I want to be reasonable with my expectations, and I know they can do more that what they are doing. Somehow we never went through the "I do it" phase. I'm still waiting for that to happen over here!

So what tasks do your kids do on their own?
What kinds of tasks do you still help with?
What tasks are you hoping they will start to do independently over the next few months?

[colinsfebmommy]

Mine will undress and dress fine, struggles with a few shirts getting stuck on his head lol and some pjs and are a little hard to get on arms cause they are fitted and socks he has a little trouble with but other than that he is good to go.

He doesn't like baths anymore and insists on showers. I lean in to wash hair and put soap on a sponge or he wastes it and then I come back to make sure all parts are clean lol

Tooth brushing, I don't trust him all that much so I squeeze toothpaste on and we brush together so I can lean over and help get spots I know he isn't doing well.

Bathroom, I still insist on wiping the tush. Even though he insists on trying it first, it never ends well

[brachysira]

Getting dressed is the worst. When we have a baby-sitter or my parents and I ask them to help, the kids just run around and have to pretty much be held down...which then exacerbates the daily struggle. On a daily basis the kids tend to not bother being silly as much, although it's not always easy to get them to focus. Feb child can take off her pants, shoes, and socks, and sometimes her shirt. She sometimes can put on her underwear and pants but usually needs a bit of help, and needs help with her shirt. She can do her socks and shoes, but cries and stalls until we help her, especially with socks... My son just turned 2 and I do it all for him although he can unzip and remove his coat and remove his shoes and socks.

Both will brush their teeth if I put toothpaste on but dentists say adults need to do it until children are 6 for optimal dental health so I do it most of the time.

Feb child will get in the bath herself and play but I still run the bath, wash her hair (with varying resistance), and help her dry off. DS tends to resist and sometimes just gets a dip.

Feb child resists going to the potty herself but she will do it. She can do all the steps but often calls to us to wipe and help her wash her hands, and needs reminders to do it all or she just won't wash her hands.

Both kids can climb into their car seats and Feb child sometimes does the buckles.

I can't wait until they get dressed and use the bathroom independently. We even got therapy because she wouldn't get dressed, but the upshot was that she just needed to practice and she didn't have any motor deficits or anything.

[kleigh926]

DD can get dressed and undressed herself- occasionally will need help with a shirt if it's a little tight, and she also usually needs help getting socks on the right way.

Bathroom- she can pee, wipe, and get hand sanitizer by herself. The knob on our sink faucet is too hard for her to do herself yet, so if she needs to actually wash with soap and water we help her. I wipe her after she poops though, I'm not sure she could do that yet without getting it everywhere. She does brush her own teeth but I always follow up because she does a lot of chewing on the toothbrush and aimlessly moving it around in her mouth instead of proper brushing. She can put toothpaste on herself but tends to get too much so I do it for her most of the time.

She can buckle herself in her car seat and even pulls up on the strap to tighten it. I always check her before we leave but she almost always does it perfectly. She will help to put laundry away after I'm done folding it, and usually does a good job cleaning up toys/books when asked.

Within the next few months, I am hoping to teach her how to wash herself in the bathtub (probably could start doing that anytime, for some reason I didn't really think of it) and start teaching her to wipe after pooping.

[pinkie]

He is really not independent but here is the list

He can undress himself, can put on his underwear and pants but needs help with his shirt. He can open the toilet and pee standing up (he is decent about getting 95% in the toilet).

That's about it - he wants help for everything.

[beenandgone]

DS1 is fairly independent. He still occasionally gets his shirt on and off, but he picks out his own clothes and dresses himself. He will take his night diapers off unassisted (we aren't night trained). He is self sufficient cleaning after the toilet, but still calls us if he's got "sticky" poop, aka he wiped once and didn't get clean.

He"makes" his bed, meaning he pulls the quilt up and pushes his trundle in until it gets stuck, picks up his laundry when I ask, but he doesn't just do it without asking first.

He bathes himself, but I help with hair and rinsing soap, and making sure he doesn't waste soap. Same with teeth.

One thing I love is that he will load his own plate and silverware into the dishwasher.

One thing that I hate is he will loosen his own car seat harness, and not just when we are stopped.

[dc2london]

DS2 doesn't really seem to have a ton of desire to do things on his own the way his older brother always has. J is very, very independent and I am just now coming to realize that that is unusual. He always wanted to do everything on his own and adhered very carefully to adult instruction on how to do so. DS2....meh. He likes to buckle his own chest clip and is very proud when he does it, but he is still more than happy to let me do the rest and to adjust the chest clip after he buckles it. He has also been feigning incompetence a fair bit (claiming inability to put on his own underpants, for example) and asking for help with things that we know he can do on his own, but I chalk a fair bit of that up to having a new baby sibling.

He CAN get himself dressed entirely. He puts on and takes off his own shoes, and puts his shoes in his bin (sometimes he needs reminders). He puts his own clothing in the hamper and hangs his own bath towel. He clears his plate after meals (again, with reminders). I also put the placemats out on the table before meals and ask him to put the napkins out. Then DS1 puts the silverware out.

I let him brush his own teeth in the morning and I go behind him and finish up, but in the evening I make sure DH or I brush his teeth so it's done very thoroughly.

[aydee]

It helps to see the range here. I sort of read the kids the riot act this week and have been insisting that they help more and do more things for themselves. We definitely need to work on dressing/undressing more independently. For now I'd even take getting the task done with help if it just meant that they weren't trying to play or do other things in the middle of it!