Find This Baby Some Sticky Glue! (A Cautious BFP)
Nov 7, 2016 12:57:51 GMT -5
Post by akraus2015 on Nov 7, 2016 12:57:51 GMT -5
I'm going for the announcement...if I say it out loud enough times maybe this one will stick!
***Trigger Warnings***
Cycle/Month: 25 months total. 12 months AL#2.
CD/DPO: 28/No Clue
EDD: July 18th, 2017
What we did: After 4 rounds of Clomid + TI, 1 round of Letrizole + TI, and two failed IUIs, we did…nothing. We got drunk in Vegas. Seriously.
Symptoms: None yet, its way too early (although I did cry in church yesterday, but let’s be honest, that happens frequently). According to LMP I’m 4w + 1d. I tested yesterday because I thought I saw some implantation bleeding last week but got a BFN. I wasn’t even going to bother testing again today and I literally changed my mind 5 minutes before I needed to walk out the door this morning. I have no idea why.
I read the test at exactly 5 minutes and got a line. Freaked out, posted in TWW for advice because the line seemed faint to me and ran to the store for a digi. Digi was positive, too! The RE is right down the road from my work so I popped in this morning for bloodwork to triple confirm. I’ll hear back by 4:00 p.m. today.
How I told my H: After two losses, one false positive, and 25 months of this hell, we’re passed the cutesy. I called him and said “So…apparently vacation is our sweet spot (we conceived Emmett on vacation, too). I’m pregnant." He said, “Huh. Like, for real this time?" I told him I wasn’t sure but I’d text him after my bloodwork came back. I know H, he won’t let himself get hurt again. He won’t get excited until this kid comes out and starts calling him Daddy.
The Mushy Stuff: I would have been lost this last two years without this place, especially my TTCAL ladies. You all have supported me, you’ve talked down my crazy when I needed it, you’ve encouraged my crazy ideas and shenanigans, and you’ve made me laugh when I need it. Never in my life did I think our journey to a family would take some of the turns it did, but I’m a better person because of it. A very wise man once told me that true character is only built through pain and sacrifice, and only through the reflection of your pain do you begin to understand your identity and purpose in a context greater than yourself. After experiencing both loss and IF, I couldn’t agree more. I’ve developed a newfound sense of purpose this past year to help bring awareness to issues like miscarriage, recurrent pregnancy loss, and infertility. I feel driven to help remove the stigma of fertility struggles so that other women know they aren’t alone. I also feel like I have a much better understanding of myself and the strength I’m capable of when I need it…
Having posted two of these before, I’m cautious in my excitement, and I know that I still have a long road ahead. The next several weeks are going to be scary as I pray and hope to make it through 1st tri. I’m grateful to know that I have my TCF family to help me through this and every other stage of this journey. I love you guys so much, but I hope I’m being kicked out of GKU for a very long time…
Today, I am pregnant.
***Trigger Warnings***
Cycle/Month: 25 months total. 12 months AL#2.
CD/DPO: 28/No Clue
EDD: July 18th, 2017
What we did: After 4 rounds of Clomid + TI, 1 round of Letrizole + TI, and two failed IUIs, we did…nothing. We got drunk in Vegas. Seriously.
Symptoms: None yet, its way too early (although I did cry in church yesterday, but let’s be honest, that happens frequently). According to LMP I’m 4w + 1d. I tested yesterday because I thought I saw some implantation bleeding last week but got a BFN. I wasn’t even going to bother testing again today and I literally changed my mind 5 minutes before I needed to walk out the door this morning. I have no idea why.
I read the test at exactly 5 minutes and got a line. Freaked out, posted in TWW for advice because the line seemed faint to me and ran to the store for a digi. Digi was positive, too! The RE is right down the road from my work so I popped in this morning for bloodwork to triple confirm. I’ll hear back by 4:00 p.m. today.
How I told my H: After two losses, one false positive, and 25 months of this hell, we’re passed the cutesy. I called him and said “So…apparently vacation is our sweet spot (we conceived Emmett on vacation, too). I’m pregnant." He said, “Huh. Like, for real this time?" I told him I wasn’t sure but I’d text him after my bloodwork came back. I know H, he won’t let himself get hurt again. He won’t get excited until this kid comes out and starts calling him Daddy.
The Mushy Stuff: I would have been lost this last two years without this place, especially my TTCAL ladies. You all have supported me, you’ve talked down my crazy when I needed it, you’ve encouraged my crazy ideas and shenanigans, and you’ve made me laugh when I need it. Never in my life did I think our journey to a family would take some of the turns it did, but I’m a better person because of it. A very wise man once told me that true character is only built through pain and sacrifice, and only through the reflection of your pain do you begin to understand your identity and purpose in a context greater than yourself. After experiencing both loss and IF, I couldn’t agree more. I’ve developed a newfound sense of purpose this past year to help bring awareness to issues like miscarriage, recurrent pregnancy loss, and infertility. I feel driven to help remove the stigma of fertility struggles so that other women know they aren’t alone. I also feel like I have a much better understanding of myself and the strength I’m capable of when I need it…
Having posted two of these before, I’m cautious in my excitement, and I know that I still have a long road ahead. The next several weeks are going to be scary as I pray and hope to make it through 1st tri. I’m grateful to know that I have my TCF family to help me through this and every other stage of this journey. I love you guys so much, but I hope I’m being kicked out of GKU for a very long time…
{Pee sticks.}
Today, I am pregnant.