Post by girpipley on Feb 13, 2015 11:16:24 GMT -5
Friends,
We want to thank you all, from the bottoms of our hearts, for all the support, love, thoughts, prayers, and encouragement during this unbearably difficult time.
I have been on the board quite a bit, and have been reading all of your posts and replies. I saw that you canceled HDBD, I saw the candles, and I saw the responses to the original post.
Your sensitivity to the situation has been much appreciated. We can never thank you enough for all of this.
Today, we are finalizing funeral arrangements for our sons, calling insurance, setting up therapy appointments, then getting out of town. My milk is coming in, which is oddly comforting. It's like they left it behind to remind me I am their mother, and I made them. I'm not sure what I'll do about it yet, but for now, I'm letting it come in. I might night Piper some smoothies or something.
We've decided to go about an hour away to a resort and spa to be alone, collect our thoughts, and to be quite honest, get drunk. We booked spa appointments for tomorrow morning, and then a private wine country limo for the rest of the day. We are allowing ourselves this weekend to do whatever it takes to get through it.
We have a therapy appointment set up for Tuesday with my regular therapist to discuss how to talk to Piper about her brothers. We won't see her until we get through that. We want to see her, but we are very weak right now, and need to be prepared for her questions and concerns.
Family viewing will be next weekend for immediate family, then burial with just me and Robert, maybe Piper, depending on what we decide with my therapist.
Next month we will do a celebration of their lives, and open it up to extended family and friends. We need time before we are ready to expose ourselves to a lot of people right now, but we also want to celebrate them, and know that many people want to do the same.
Planning your child's funeral, let me tell you, it sucks.
In have a few favors to ask of you all, if you don't mind. I feel like you have all done so much already, but this is a good resource to reach many people.
1. Are any of you good with photoshop? We would like to show Piper a picture of her brothers, but do not want to scare her. I don't want to take away their natural beauty, I just want the redness and puffy eyes dimmed from Miles, and maybe some color brought into Scott. I just want them to look like babies that Piper can understand. I'm happy to pay for this, of course, I just would prefer to not find someone privately who I would have to explain the story to.
2. Any graphic designers? Robert and I have wanted to get new tattoos since we met. (Not couples or anything, we just both want one). We have decided to each get two snowflakes. I want mine about the size of a 50 cent piece, one with an M and one with an S in the middle. I'd like something classy, and elegant. Robert wants his a bit bigger, and somewhat masculine, but also very classy, also with M&S. If any of you or your husbands have skills in this area, please PM me. I can give you a few ideas of what we are thinking. Once again, we are happy to pay for this.
Once again, we thank you all so very much for everything you have done for us, and for me specifically. This is by far, the most horrible thing we will ever go through, but having you all by my side has made it seem easier.
We have a lot of emotional trauma to recover from, and a lot of future thoughts and wished memories to deal with.
We love you all, more than I can express.
Thank you, and love you,
-Cait and Robert
We want to thank you all, from the bottoms of our hearts, for all the support, love, thoughts, prayers, and encouragement during this unbearably difficult time.
I have been on the board quite a bit, and have been reading all of your posts and replies. I saw that you canceled HDBD, I saw the candles, and I saw the responses to the original post.
Your sensitivity to the situation has been much appreciated. We can never thank you enough for all of this.
Today, we are finalizing funeral arrangements for our sons, calling insurance, setting up therapy appointments, then getting out of town. My milk is coming in, which is oddly comforting. It's like they left it behind to remind me I am their mother, and I made them. I'm not sure what I'll do about it yet, but for now, I'm letting it come in. I might night Piper some smoothies or something.
We've decided to go about an hour away to a resort and spa to be alone, collect our thoughts, and to be quite honest, get drunk. We booked spa appointments for tomorrow morning, and then a private wine country limo for the rest of the day. We are allowing ourselves this weekend to do whatever it takes to get through it.
We have a therapy appointment set up for Tuesday with my regular therapist to discuss how to talk to Piper about her brothers. We won't see her until we get through that. We want to see her, but we are very weak right now, and need to be prepared for her questions and concerns.
Family viewing will be next weekend for immediate family, then burial with just me and Robert, maybe Piper, depending on what we decide with my therapist.
Next month we will do a celebration of their lives, and open it up to extended family and friends. We need time before we are ready to expose ourselves to a lot of people right now, but we also want to celebrate them, and know that many people want to do the same.
Planning your child's funeral, let me tell you, it sucks.
In have a few favors to ask of you all, if you don't mind. I feel like you have all done so much already, but this is a good resource to reach many people.
1. Are any of you good with photoshop? We would like to show Piper a picture of her brothers, but do not want to scare her. I don't want to take away their natural beauty, I just want the redness and puffy eyes dimmed from Miles, and maybe some color brought into Scott. I just want them to look like babies that Piper can understand. I'm happy to pay for this, of course, I just would prefer to not find someone privately who I would have to explain the story to.
2. Any graphic designers? Robert and I have wanted to get new tattoos since we met. (Not couples or anything, we just both want one). We have decided to each get two snowflakes. I want mine about the size of a 50 cent piece, one with an M and one with an S in the middle. I'd like something classy, and elegant. Robert wants his a bit bigger, and somewhat masculine, but also very classy, also with M&S. If any of you or your husbands have skills in this area, please PM me. I can give you a few ideas of what we are thinking. Once again, we are happy to pay for this.
Once again, we thank you all so very much for everything you have done for us, and for me specifically. This is by far, the most horrible thing we will ever go through, but having you all by my side has made it seem easier.
We have a lot of emotional trauma to recover from, and a lot of future thoughts and wished memories to deal with.
We love you all, more than I can express.
Thank you, and love you,
-Cait and Robert