~*~ PgAL/PAIF check-in week of February 5 ~*~

[muscari]

Welcome to the PgAL and PAIF check-in!

Oops, I'm a day late, been a bit of a weird weekend for me, soryr ladies!

This is a weekly check-in for those of us who are pregnant after loss and/or infertility. Feel free to jump in any time!
The check-in is a safe place to share all things that come with being PgAL and/or PAIF. Use this thread to ask questions, share your excitement/rage/worries/whatever, or to ask for support!

Please come on in and let us know how you're doing, and know you are always welcome to come back throughout the week whenever you need to!! ♥

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PgAL Mantras
www.goodbyecb.proboards.com/thread/1034/pgal-mantras

PAIF Mantras
www.goodbyecb.proboards.com/thread/57254/welcome-paif-read-before-posting


**Loss/trigger warnings are not necessary here**

*~*~*~*~*

Weekly check-in:

How far along are you?

How are you feeling (physically/emotionally)?

Any appointments or milestones coming up this week?

Do you need any thoughts or prayers?

Anything else you'd like to share?

QoTW: What is your most favorite relaxing pastime right now?

[muscari]

We have our NT scan scheduled for the 7th at which time we will also get the results of our genetic BW. We also have a meeting with the MFM that same afternoon. So I'll update after those!

[king26]

How far along are you?
11w4d

How are you feeling (physically/emotionally)?
Pretty good although constipation is setting in this week (FUN!)

Any appointments or milestones coming up this week?
We will be telling my family next weekend. I finally feel like this is going to happen and we will be seeing them in person (they live a few hours away). It'll be nice to have people know!
Also, NT scan is the 15th

Do you need any thoughts or prayers?
Nope

Anything else you'd like to share?
DH and I have just started thinking about everything we will need to get and are pretty clueless. We've realized we're going to need some help.

QoTW: What is your most favorite relaxing pastime right now?
I'd been really happy laying on the couch and reading in the evenings.

[yellowcat]

How far along are you? 14w 5d

How are you feeling (physically/emotionally)? Still tired, and some headaches but if I wasn't showing I really would forget I am PG.

Any appointments or milestones coming up this week? Nothing til the 28th.

Do you need any thoughts or prayers? Nope

Anything else you'd like to share? We started telling some family this week and I am freaking out about it. I am not sure why because everything looks good. I decided not to tell anyone at work for as long as I can. I am a professor and my collegues get pissy if they think someone is getting unfair time off (they view this as cheating to get out of teaching, they annoy me). Everyone but me in my department is 60 plus and are not really sympathetic to family leave.

QoTW: What is your most favorite relaxing pastime right now? Working which I know is weird, but doing research forces me to zone out for a while. I am really productive lately!

[addymac]

yellowcat ugh I'm sorry your work is so unfriendly. I'm holding off on telling mine bc I'm too nervous still but they tend to be a little nicer to preggos and not give us kids with super bad contagious infections so I guess the day they try to do that is the day I'll tell them. Or the day I have to get out of holding a kid for an X-ray.

[addymac]

How far along are you? 12+1. I feel like I've been in the first tri forever since they pushed me back two weeks. Ugh!

How are you feeling (physically/emotionally)? Still nauseous all the fucking time. Right now it's not so bad but man it has not let up. Constantly hungry. At least we are working on healthier eating otherwise I'd be an elephant right now.

Any appointments or milestones coming up this week? Nope. Has the NT scan last Thursday and all was good. Nothing until MARCH 2!

Do you need any thoughts or prayers? I'm okay. I'm getting nervous about going so long between the NT scan and my next dr appt - I guess it's just four weeks- but I'm worried bc it was at 14w we found out the baby died, so I'm scared that I don't get to hear the heartbeat at 14w to make sure it's still kicking around in there. Wish I could do a quick Doppler check or something ☹️

Anything else you'd like to share? I'm going to tell my parents this week. I've been battling telling them bc I just feel so distant after everything that happened last time and the way I had to deal with taking care of them and their needs after my baby died. But we had a good convo on Saturday and I briefly felt close to them again. I guess I worry that by telling them they are going to be all up in my space and trying to be super involved and I just don't feel close to them anymore so I want my distance without hurting them.

QoTW: What is your most favorite relaxing pastime right now? Sleep lol. I guess watching mindless tv is nice too. Idk I don't have a lot of hobbies.

[therealbug]

muscari, good luck with the MFM!

king26, I found this list helpful when trying to figure out what we needed.

yellowcat, I'm on the fence about when to tell people at work. My boss knows but know one else does. I'm leaning towards just letting them notice when I start obviously showing.

addymac, call your doctor and see if they will get you in for a doppler check midway between. With your history that is something they should do for you. Lots of (((hugs))) as you approach your milestone.




How far along are you?

11w3d

How are you feeling (physically/emotionally)?

Mostly tired. My energy is just zapped and I feel like I need to take multiple sanity days off from work.

Any appointments or milestones coming up this week?

We have our first MFM appointment on Thursday. Our NT scan should be schedule for that day also with the MFM but I'm not 100% confident that the OB scheduler made that happen.

Do you need any thoughts or prayers?

That we have a perfect NT scan. So many worries that something will be wrong with one of these LOs.

Anything else you'd like to share?

I bought two pairs of maternity jeans yesterday and OMG! I knew my regular jeans were getting tight around the waist but when I put on the mat jeans in the dressing room I pretty much did not want to take them off. My belly says thank you. This was also a big step because I was going to wait until 2nd tri before buying anything for this pg.

I've been obsessively googling 11 week twin bumps and am guessing that I have about two more weeks tops before I'm showing pretty obviously. I have a mental short list of the clothes I absolutely need for work (I'm in court at least 2x per week).

QoTW: What is your most favorite relaxing pastime right now?

I'll have to go with reading because I don't think sleeping qualifies as a pastime

[addymac]

Feb 5, 2017 23:21:15 GMT -5 therealbug said:

addymac, call your doctor and see if they will get you in for a doppler check midway between. With your history that is something they should do for you. Lots of (((hugs))) as you approach your milestone.

I would, but we are going to be out of town on vacation from 13+5 til 15+2, which is why our appt is so far out! So I'm just in limbo since I can't ask for a check up. I'm just hoping my vacation will distract me enough- haha yeah right! I just need this milestone to pass and hear a heartbeat and see it dancing around and then I think I'll be less of a mess 🙃

[cali]

Hi ladies!

How far along are you? 11w4d

How are you feeling (physically/emotionally)? Physically, fine. Emotionally, still having good days and bad. This is the longest we've gone without an ultrasound so of course, that makes me anxious.

Any appointments or milestones coming up this week? We have our NT scan on Friday and if that looks good I'll finally feel like I can breathe a little.

Do you need any thoughts or prayers? Just for a good NT scan.

Anything else you'd like to share? We got our genetic testing results back today and everything came back normal. That was such a HUGE relief. I also found out the sex. It's a girl! I'm shocked because I really felt like it was a boy but we're thrilled to be having a little girl.

QoTW: What is your most favorite relaxing pastime right now? Watching Netflix, I've binged so many shows this past month.

[cali]

muscari, good luck tomorrow! Looking forward to your update.

king26, I really haven't even begun to think that far, it seems so overwhelming!

yellowcat, I'm sorry your co-workers are kind of assholes about maternity leave. Maybe they'll surprise you?

addymac, I hope you have a great vacation and can relax a little! Milestones are so tough. ((Hugs))

therealbug, good luck Thursday, I hope they get your NT scan done!

[king26]

addymac, I totally get being worried about telling your parents. That's why I haven't told anyone, not even my parents. I was so glad I didn't tell them when we had our loss because I had such a hard time dealing with it I wouldn't have been able to dealt with my mom's grief on top of that. ((HUGS)) I hope everything goes well for you.

Thanks for the list therealbug,

[Mom2Ms]

How far along are you?

10w4d

Any appointments or milestones coming up this week?

Have first appointment with regular OBGYN this week. I'm going to be referred to a specialist here soon. (See below)

Do you need any thoughts or prayers?

Yes, please. I started spotting over the weekend. Today an ultrasound confirmed that I have lost Baby B, as there was no longer a HB. Baby A is measuring at 10w4d and had a great heartbeat. However, they aren't sure, but it's possible that the surviving baby may have a hole in their abdomen, possibly where the umbilical cord is located. They said it could be that, nothing, or "whartons jelly." They believe that baby B likely had chromosome issues, so I will do genetic testing for Baby A likely this week. I'm so worried that something is wrong with Baby A. Apparently having genetic abnormalities is rare for BOTH twins, but I'm just so worried about this and this abdomen thing. I could really use some thoughts & prayers for this baby. My heart is absolutely breaking right now.

Anything else you'd like to share?

Nope. I think that's quite enough.

QoTW: What is your most favorite relaxing pastime right now? Watching TV... I've been on a lot of rest lately.

[PepperPottsJ]

How far along are you? 10+6

How are you feeling (physically/emotionally)? Just got off of the phone with RE and Panorama results came back low risk. This coming off of this morning where the panorama portal updated to say estimated completion of 2/9. Such a mind fuck roller coaster but wow I can breathe a little bit now. Physically tired and nauseous same old same old

Any appointments or milestones coming up this week? Nope, NT scheduled for 2/13, this will be my first 2 week stretch for an US.

Do you need any thoughts or prayers? Prayers for a good NT scan please, thank you!

Anything else you'd like to share? Nope.

QoTW: What is your most favorite relaxing pastime right now? cuddling on the couch and getting past the nausea.

muscari, good luck tomorrow!!
king26, I have IBS-C and I am terrified of it getting worse
yellowcat, I am holding off at work also, although I suspect everyone knows. While my company is highly ranked by "working mother" in my position Im not certain how it will go over. My boss is awesome, just the rest of the world.
addymac, good luck with your parents and I hope you enjoy your very deserved vacation!
therealbug, good luck Thursday
cali, Good luck Friday and YAY team pink!!
@ketchup, I hope vaca helps the time fly, the past 2 weeks have been torture! GL!

[PepperPottsJ]

Mom2Ms, LT = hugs and then more hugs. you are in my thoughts and prayers. So much love to you.

[addymac]

@mom2ms I'm so sorry about Baby B. Sending you a very big hug. Hoping Baby A keeps up their strong hb and the results are negative/low risk. And the "hole" is nothing serious. You guys are all in my thoughts.

@ketchup - we don't have a Doppler and my DH is pretty against getting one. He thinks it'll make me crazier, and with my retroverted uterus, more room for error on our part to not find a hb. I don't mind too much, I just wish I could have a super quick check and then carry on. I keep wondering if I could find a planned parenthood in California and just run in and be like pleeeeeease haha. I'm crazy.

[PepperPottsJ]

addymac, forgive me if I am overstepping, what about an urgent care? I would assume they usually have a machine?

[addymac]

Feb 6, 2017 17:13:35 GMT -5 PepperPottsJ said:

addymac, forgive me if I am overstepping, what about an urgent care? I would assume they usually have a machine?

Not overstepping at all! I have actually thought of that, too. And then worry I *am* crazy. I will see how my anxiety holds up and if I'm just not chilling out on vacation will most likely drag DH to a PP or urgent care and deal with the $ fallout bc sanity > money. I have been contemplating making a list of places in the cities we are going to go to 😂

Of course my nausea is at an all time high today and if this keeps up, I really should have no reason to panic, but. Yeah.

[Mom2Ms]

Thanks addymac and @ketchup - means a lot. I need answers, but my RE said to be patient as we are in limbo status as is and now we've got to deal with this. F$&k my life sometimes. The worst part is going to be telling DD that I've lost one of the babies. I sure as shit hope the other is good to go & healthy and this hole thing resolves itself.

[therealbug]

Mom2Ms, I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. I hope they are able to get the test results back quickly on Baby A and that everything comes back okay. Lots of ((((hugs)))).

[cravingchocolate05]

Best of luck today muscari

addymac Hope you can relax on your vacation.

cali congrats on good genetic testing results and news of a girl

@mom2ms So sorry you are going through this. Hugs!

[cravingchocolate05]

Weekly check-in:

How far along are you? 12w

How are you feeling (physically/emotionally)?

Still very nauseated and exhausted. I feel like I need to eat constantly to stave off the nausea, but I have a bunch of random aversions this week (chicken nuggets). I'm a little less crazy than last week. I think I feel my belly bulging out a tiny bit (in addition to the normal blubber which makes it look huge) so that gives me hope the baby is actually growing. I don't feel as many stretching pains as I think I should, but that's just my crazy

Any appointments or milestones coming up this week? Thursday the 9th appt/ultrasound

Do you need any thoughts or prayers?

I'm dreading my appt Thursday. This was the appt last pregnancy in September when we got bad news. My Dr was great with my 9 week appt this pregnancy and got me right in and found the hb before blood pressure, blood work, etc. Hopefully, she does the same this time BC I will be freaking out.

Anything else you'd like to share?

Nope.

QoTW: What is your most favorite relaxing pastime right now

I agree with sleeping! But watching TV with dh if I can stay awake.

[cali]

Mom2Ms, I'm so sorry for your loss of Baby B. I'm sending all thoughts and prayers your way for Baby A.

[jt2378]

Mom2Ms, I'm so sorry about your loss of baby B, thoughts and prayers that baby A is ok, love and hugs

[Mom2Ms]

Thanks for all the love & support ladies! I'll update tomorrow when I have more info from my OBGYN.

[elliecat17]

How far along are you? 12w (u/s today put us at 12w2d).

How are you feeling (physically/emotionally)? Physically nausea comes and goes, back hurts and I'm always exhausted by the end of the day.
Emotionally I feel so much better now that we saw baby again!

Any appointments or milestones coming up this week?
U/S today.

Do you need any thoughts or prayers?
Nope but thanks!

Anything else you'd like to share? Not right now.

QoTW: What is your most favorite relaxing pastime right now? Watching TV and reading.

[addymac]

I think I'm having cramping in my lower back. I think this is somewhat normal?? At first I thought it was just my back being my back but then I realized I recognized this pain as cramps. Google wasn't particularly helpful but I'm not spotting and still nausea and throwing up so it's probably nothing, right?

[cravingchocolate05]

Feb 8, 2017 18:10:09 GMT -5 addymac said:

I think I'm having cramping in my lower back. I think this is somewhat normal?? At first I thought it was just my back being my back but then I realized I recognized this pain as cramps. Google wasn't particularly helpful but I'm not spotting and still nausea and throwing up so it's probably nothing, right?

addymac I don't know if this is helpful, but I've had back cramping on and off and after freaking attributed it to either stretching or not drinking enough water. It's usually on one side or the other (though once it was in the middle which really scared me) and it usually lasted a day or so. It always seemed to go away once I drank a ton of water.

[Mom2Ms]

So, my OBGYN is not concerned about the hole in the abdomen thing. She said it's common for it to be open or have a mass at this stage because things are still moving and closing up. She didn't see anything alarming to her on the U/S. I'm going to have an U/S next week for more in depth look & for potential genetic defects that can be seen on the scan. I did initial genetic testing today, but having twins (even if one dies) thing can throw it off. So, depending on the results, I will either be referred for CVS or Amnio. She told me to not stress or worry and that the other doctor is overly cautious & conservative. So that's where things are. Not good. Not bad. Limbo. Baby A is measuring exactly where they are supposed to be and it looks good according to bedside ultrasound machine. I'll get preliminary results next week..... Baby B has already shrunk down to a baby size of 7 weeks, so it's happening pretty quickly, considering on Monday it was measuring at 8 weeks. So yeah. More waiting.

[Mom2Ms]

Feb 8, 2017 18:10:09 GMT -5 addymac said:

I think I'm having cramping in my lower back. I think this is somewhat normal?? At first I thought it was just my back being my back but then I realized I recognized this pain as cramps. Google wasn't particularly helpful but I'm not spotting and still nausea and throwing up so it's probably nothing, right?

I go through this at times & I think it's a combo of back pain & gas. I'm pretty sure having 2 kids up in there left my intestines looking like a ball of yarn. I think things get displaced early on too. And don't forget all the hormones that make our bones & joints & whatnot relax & separate. BUT. If you're super worried & it comes with spotting, I'd call.

[addymac]

Thanks, ladies. It's a bit better and I'm trying to drink more water tonight and walk around and stretch. Idk if it's gas at all but I am gassy. I guess it is what it is.