Panic Attacks and Getting Pregnant

[daisy818]

Feb 18, 2015 11:30:28 GMT -5 joy said:

Feb 18, 2015 10:07:10 GMT -5 daisy818 said:

I have generalized anxiety but my main issue is a severe phobia (emetophobia, which for me is an irrational fear of others vomiting - rather unfortunate for having kids). Exposure to my trigger causes a massive panic attack - heart rate jumpes to near 200, sweating, dizziness, fight or flight, racing thoughts, shaking, whole nine yards. I have tried a number of things - cognitive behavioral therapy, self-guided hypnosis, deep breathing exercises, etc. I started this all within the last two years because I got engaged to a man with a kid (who unfortunately is also very anxious about everything to the point that he makes himself throw up) and also want to have a kid of my own. The problem with my phobia is that it's hard to know if it's working - unlike a fear of heights or crowds, where you can do a controlled test to find out if you are improving, I just have to wait for an out-of-the-blue episode of someone puking in front of me to see if my therapy has helped. So far, that hasn't happened but I've been able to tolerate babies spitting up and have cleaned up dog puke twice. Baby steps.

Tl;dr: I *think* cognitive behavioral therapy has helped my phobia-induced panic attacks, which have never been treated with medication. Would definitely recommend therapy. Also, I have a weird-ass phobia.

I have this phobia.  It's what lead to my agoraphobia.

I did an intense, six week exposure therapy program to improve myself.  Best decision I've ever made.  Emetophobia ruined parts of my childhood and still is a problem in areas of my adulthood.  But, I do feel myself getting better.  It's an uphill battle that you have to want to fight.

Have you ever seen the Monty Python skit with Mr. Creosote?  Fucking Mr. Creosote.  Don't google it if you've never seen it.  He's a very fat mat who loves eating, goes to a restaurant, and spends the whole time puking because he's eaten everything in sight.  That skit makes most people laugh, but I bawled my eyes out and turned it off when I first saw it.  NOPE.

There is a website called Kids-in-mind that does detailed movie reviews for parents, telling every single detail of sex/gore/bad language, and they consider vomit to be gore. I check that site before I watch any movie.  People also joke that I have a 6th sense about people vomiting - IRL and in shows.  I'll say, oh god, that character is about to throw up and turn my head, and then a few seconds later it happens.  I truly have never understood how people find vomit hilarious, but I guess I'm not in the best position to judge whether it's funny, bc I find it traumatizing. 

I'm so glad to hear that your therapy helped. This phobia seems so silly to others but it can be so debilitating. I first started showing signs of it at age 3 (from my mother's severe morning sickness with my siblings) - if she so much as coughed I would run and hide, covering my ears and rocking back and forth to comfort myself.  She still feels so guilty. 

[daisy818]

Feb 18, 2015 11:36:12 GMT -5 squeakyduck said:

joy- Apollo 13 got to me as a kid. It was so bad that I didn't see the full movie until I had to watch it at a conference in college. But I can watch it now with no anxiety.

I've still never seen Meaning of Life though. My parents (wisely) never even tried that one. But I survived Pitch Perfect.

Apollo 13 still haunts me.

[daisy818]

Feb 18, 2015 11:27:50 GMT -5 squeakyduck said:

daisy818, I have emetophobia too! It's actually not at all weird- it's one of the most common phobias.

My therapist said the same thing - I thought I was so bizarre, but she said she's treated a bunch of people for it.

[squeakyduck]

Feb 18, 2015 11:36:17 GMT -5 daisy818 said:

Feb 18, 2015 11:30:28 GMT -5 joy said:

I have this phobia.  It's what lead to my agoraphobia.

I did an intense, six week exposure therapy program to improve myself.  Best decision I've ever made.  Emetophobia ruined parts of my childhood and still is a problem in areas of my adulthood.  But, I do feel myself getting better.  It's an uphill battle that you have to want to fight.

Have you ever seen the Monty Python skit with Mr. Creosote?  Fucking Mr. Creosote.  Don't google it if you've never seen it.  He's a very fat mat who loves eating, goes to a restaurant, and spends the whole time puking because he's eaten everything in sight.  That skit makes most people laugh, but I bawled my eyes out and turned it off when I first saw it.  NOPE.

There is a website called Kids-in-mind that does detailed movie reviews for parents, telling every single detail of sex/gore/bad language, and they consider vomit to be gore. I check that site before I watch any movie.  People also joke that I have a 6th sense about people vomiting - IRL and in shows.  I'll say, oh god, that character is about to throw up and turn my head, and then a few seconds later it happens.  I truly have never understood how people find vomit hilarious, but I guess I'm not in the best position to judge whether it's funny, bc I find it traumatizing. 

I'm so glad to hear that your therapy helped. This phobia seems so silly to others but it can be so debilitating. I first started showing signs of it at age 3 (from my mother's severe morning sickness with my siblings) - if she so much as coughed I would run and hide, covering my ears and rocking back and forth to comfort myself.  She still feels so guilty. 

My mom had severe morning sickness too.

We actually do pretty much have a sixth sense. My therapist said that people with emet are hyperaware of those little cues that most people don't pay attention to. And then confirmation bias is a bitch about it.

[joy]

Oh yes - the 6th sense for puking. Yes, I have that, too!!

I can watch it on TV/movies now. I will sometimes get the adrenaline rush/panic feeling but sometimes I don't. If I don't, then my husband gives me a high five. Ha.

I'm still trying to figure out how I'll manage the puking bug in my house with my husband or I. I do ask him a lot to not get so drunk that he pukes EVER. He's understanding of me - I've been like this forever!

We rarely have house guests. People find this crazy. But, we have no kids, so when people come to stay, we go out. And I do NOT trust people to not get so drunk that they aren't puking all over my bathroom. Home needs to be calm and a haven for me. I'm not big on inviting anxiety into my house.

Phobias in general are difficult to understand. But, anything you've felt with emetophobia, I bet I've felt it, too. When I was a kid, I'd inspect food to a fault (food poisoning scared the daylights out of me). I've relaxed a bit. But, I do want as many bathrooms in my home as people so everyone can be sick in their own. I rarely ride rollercoaster/rides that would make others vomit. Boats? NO BOATS. Airplanes? Turbulence can get bad - what if it makes me sick? Dramamine before all flights.

Ha - I swear, I'm better.

[daisy818]

Feb 18, 2015 11:42:09 GMT -5 joy said:

Oh yes - the 6th sense for puking. Yes, I have that, too!!

I can watch it on TV/movies now. I will sometimes get the adrenaline rush/panic feeling but sometimes I don't. If I don't, then my husband gives me a high five. Ha.

I'm still trying to figure out how I'll manage the puking bug in my house with my husband or I. I do ask him a lot to not get so drunk that he pukes EVER. He's understanding of me - I've been like this forever!

We rarely have house guests. People find this crazy. But, we have no kids, so when people come to stay, we go out. And I do NOT trust people to not get so drunk that they aren't puking all over my bathroom. Home needs to be calm and a haven for me. I'm not big on inviting anxiety into my house.

Phobias in general are difficult to understand. But, anything you've felt with emetophobia, I bet I've felt it, too. When I was a kid, I'd inspect food to a fault (food poisoning scared the daylights out of me). I've relaxed a bit. But, I do want as many bathrooms in my home as people so everyone can be sick in their own. I rarely ride rollercoaster/rides that would make others vomit. Boats? NO BOATS. Airplanes? Turbulence can get bad - what if it makes me sick? Dramamine before all flights.

Ha - I swear, I'm better.

I *hate* flying - before a flight I take Ativan (and sometimes Advil PM) and just try to sleep the whole way.  On our honeymoon we took a catamaran tour and of course some girl got sick - luckily DH saw and helped me get further away from her on the boat.  I'm very lucky that DH doesn't drink anymore and also hates to have people around when he pukes - definitely not sad that I'm not there to comfort him. 

And setsuna17, sorry to have hijacked your post and turned it into an emetophobia support group session!

[setsuna17]

Feb 18, 2015 10:07:10 GMT -5 daisy818 said:

I have generalized anxiety but my main issue is a severe phobia (emetophobia, which for me is an irrational fear of others vomiting - rather unfortunate for having kids). Exposure to my trigger causes a massive panic attack - heart rate jumpes to near 200, sweating, dizziness, fight or flight, racing thoughts, shaking, whole nine yards. I have tried a number of things - cognitive behavioral therapy, self-guided hypnosis, deep breathing exercises, etc. I started this all within the last two years because I got engaged to a man with a kid (who unfortunately is also very anxious about everything to the point that he makes himself throw up) and also want to have a kid of my own. The problem with my phobia is that it's hard to know if it's working - unlike a fear of heights or crowds, where you can do a controlled test to find out if you are improving, I just have to wait for an out-of-the-blue episode of someone puking in front of me to see if my therapy has helped. So far, that hasn't happened but I've been able to tolerate babies spitting up and have cleaned up dog puke twice. Baby steps.

Tl;dr: I *think* cognitive behavioral therapy has helped my phobia-induced panic attacks, which have never been treated with medication. Would definitely recommend therapy. Also, I have a weird-ass phobia.

emetophobia is quite common actually! I get panic attacks when my stomach hurts. Or my stomach hurts when I panic. I'm not quite sure which anymore.

[setsuna17]

Feb 17, 2015 15:38:04 GMT -5 icequeen said:

So sorry you are experiencing the worsening panic attacks. I completely understand what you are going through. I, too, get panic attacks, but I am not sure if mine are exactly like yours. Mine usually include my chest getting really hot, racing heartbeat, headache, and trouble breathing. Mine were more under control before I got pregnant and during pregnancy, but after the birth of my DD when things in my marriage and life in general with a new baby got more intense, so did the panic attacks. I refused medication and therapy for a while, due to my own stubbornness, but recently have started up again. I would highly recommend seeing a psychiatrist that specializes in women's health. I just started seeing a psych that deals with only pregnant and postpartum women, and she is phenomenal. That, coupled with weekly therapy has been helping me stay in control. I am also now on a cocktail of three different medications that deal with my various symptoms.

Again, just know you are not alone and that there is hope. It seems like a lot of women can relate and have given you great insight. Big hugs to you and I will be praying for you to find a solution!

That's amazing that you found a psychiatrist who deals with pregnant and post partum women! that sounds amazing!

[setsuna17]

Feb 18, 2015 10:40:35 GMT -5 anonymouseliza said:

I wanted throw out something and if it's useful, awesome, if it's not, I won't be offended if you ignore it. Panic attacks were not an issue for me going into my last pregnancy (they've become a work-related issue since), but anxiety was a huge issue. I had panic attacks before most ultrasounds for a long time. I had a long history of loss and a ton of fear and my doc did not want me to medicate at all, if avoidable, but definitely not in first tri (especially with my history).

I don't know if I can tell you how I made it through, because I didn't find a compatible therapist. I think it wasn't the healthiest way, tbh. I held out to 24 weeks and then the anxiety was so high and so choking and the fear was so overwhelming (even though we'd passed the point I lost my son and had made it to viability and the cerclage was holding strong), that I told my doc I could not do it anymore. I wasn't sleeping, I was a mess at work, my b/p was high (from stress and not just PIH) and I was an absolute wreck. We talked about trying to wait until third tri, but I couldn't. I started lowest dose of Zoloft available and it helped so, so, so, so much. At that point, my needs outweighed the possible risks involved, but the risks were pretty minimal anyway. I had a NICU team in the room at delivery in case there were breathing issues at birth, but because I was induced for pre-e and on mag sulfate, that would have happened anyway. V had lower first apgar (but was born with a nuchal cord) but was perked up and crying within three minutes of birth and has been pretty normal ever since.

So all of that to say that you've been given some great ideas for things to try and ways to cope and I sincerely hope they work beautifully for you. But if they don't and you end up needing some meds there are pregnancy-safe meds available and it's completely, 100% ok to take advantage of that. Best wishes to you. This isn't an easy thing, and you are brave to face it head-on.

Thank you for sharing your experience too. I know that if I need meds I will take them. I'm glad to hear a story where it turned out well with meds as well.

[icequeen]

Feb 18, 2015 15:18:18 GMT -5 setsuna17 said:

Feb 17, 2015 15:38:04 GMT -5 icequeen said:

So sorry you are experiencing the worsening panic attacks. I completely understand what you are going through. I, too, get panic attacks, but I am not sure if mine are exactly like yours. Mine usually include my chest getting really hot, racing heartbeat, headache, and trouble breathing. Mine were more under control before I got pregnant and during pregnancy, but after the birth of my DD when things in my marriage and life in general with a new baby got more intense, so did the panic attacks. I refused medication and therapy for a while, due to my own stubbornness, but recently have started up again. I would highly recommend seeing a psychiatrist that specializes in women's health. I just started seeing a psych that deals with only pregnant and postpartum women, and she is phenomenal. That, coupled with weekly therapy has been helping me stay in control. I am also now on a cocktail of three different medications that deal with my various symptoms.

Again, just know you are not alone and that there is hope. It seems like a lot of women can relate and have given you great insight. Big hugs to you and I will be praying for you to find a solution!

That's amazing that you found a psychiatrist who deals with pregnant and post partum women! that sounds amazing!

Yes I know! I really lucked out because she is usually completely booked up but she made an exception for me. I almost cried when her office called me back and agreed to schedule me the following week. I would have had to wait months. You might want to check with the OB department at your birth hospital and see what psych they use for referrals.

[squeakyduck]

Feb 18, 2015 15:53:34 GMT -5 icequeen said:

Feb 18, 2015 15:18:18 GMT -5 setsuna17 said:

That's amazing that you found a psychiatrist who deals with pregnant and post partum women! that sounds amazing!

Yes I know! I really lucked out because she is usually completely booked up but she made an exception for me. I almost cried when her office called me back and agreed to schedule me the following week. I would have had to wait months. You might want to check with the OB department at your birth hospital and see what psych they use for referrals.

I plan to have a psych lined up before I give birth. Based on my reaction to getting a puppy, I'm sure I'm high risk for all kinds of pp problems.

[BrewGirl]

I have terrible anxiety disorder. When I was pregnant with D, I was on a small dosage of zoloft. It helped. Honestly, when I was pregnant was the longest period I had gone without feeling too anxious at any given point (minus L&D). It's like something with the pregnancy gave me a natural relaxant. I felt amazing. It came soaring back though post delivery (about 6 months) and I went back on my usual regimen.