Weekend Loungin'

[lilyelayne]

Or will it be a busy weekend?

[seamonster]

H comes home tomorrow night. It'll be good to see him.

I went and planted flowers and had snack at DS's daycare for Earth Day. The kids were super cute.

Birthday parties Saturday and Sunday afternoon. And swim lessons. It's going to be busy. Hopefully H is up to go with DS to the Sunday party and maybe benefit will have an opening and I can get my browser done for the first time in like 6 months.

[dreemkin]

Pictures went so well last night! Despite being a bit apprehensive, A finally didn't cry during them. So happy to have stress free pics from here on out. We got a nice discount too bc she took a few coupons I had!

Today grandma/grandpa are coming over to do terrariums with the girls (part of their Easter gift). We also got live caterpillars a few days ago in the mail and we will watch them grow into painted lady butterflies. The girls are getting a kick out of it!

[lilyelayne]

dreemkin oh man G would love the caterpillars. We read Clovis Crawfish and Petite Papillon all the time (which is about a butterfly egg hatching and ends with the caterpillar becoming a butterfly.)

[lilyelayne]

Gabe's napping. The beach wears him out :-)

[dreemkin]

Apr 21, 2017 14:08:14 GMT -5 lilyelayne said:

dreemkin oh man G would love the caterpillars. We read Clovis Crawfish and Petite Papillon all the time (which is about a butterfly egg hatching and ends with the caterpillar becoming a butterfly.)

The company is 'Insect Lore' if you are interested. There are also other insect kits available besides the butterflies.

[kartish]

I am the only person in my entire building today. Gotta love mud season.

Yesterday was a busy day and this morning was hectic. My mom went to NY to be with my aunt, so my sister is watching the boys today and I was running around like a chicken this morning since it's her first time watching both boys.

So I'm looking forward to the peace and quiet at the office.

[seamonster]

I got contacted about a possible job. We'll see what comes of it, but the group does some interesting stuff. And H and I would be working at the same site again.

[dreemkin]

Bonjour! Today we are doing some errands. I had my grandmother's antique floor lamp repaired and rewired and now I need to find a shade for it. I don't want to spend more than the actual repair work but I think that might prove difficult lol. Why are shades so expensive? I am also looking for some decorative shelves for my living room bc we are close to being done decorating in there!

Rant and help needed: Tonight I'd love to go to church bc we haven't been in so long. I don't get support from H on that so it's hard. I grew up strictly, in the religious aspect, and he had no religous upbringing. He pursued Christianity on his own in college but he doesn't like the Catholic mass (I don't blame him; if you never went before it can feel stuffy). I have agreed to go to different denomination masses if he wishes but he doesn't seem interested at all. I want the girls to have a Catholic upbringing with CCD/sacriments. We were married Catholic and have baptized our children in agreement of raising them religiously. I don't know how to resolve this issue as he already knows I'd like to attend more masses. It's hard for me; it feels like I keep beating a dead horse every week. Edited to add: l have offered to take the girls myself but then he says "no l guess I'll go" but it's like I'm dragging him to his death. ...WWYD?

[kartish]

dreemkin that is hard when he agrees to go but his attitude is all negative. It was similar with my parents. My dad was raised catholic. We went to catholic mass when I was little but as we got older my dad was negative and we wouldn't go often, or we would go without him. Then as we were starting to get an age for first communion, my mom decided that since my dad wasn't interested, she'd rather raise us in a faith more similar to her own, and we moved to a lutheran church and went pretty much every week without fail.

If you want to take the girls then take the girls. Talk to your DH and tell him you'd love for him to be there, but it's his choice and you're going to stop asking him, you are just going to plan on going to mass every week, and if he joins you he joins you. But if he joins you he needs to do it with a positive outlook. That's my advice anyway.

[aggiebug]

Gah that is tough dreemkin. I think kartish has wise words and agree.

Beyond her suggestion I had one thought, do you think if you found a church home he felt comfortable in and became a part of he would be more eager to go? Because if some of his hesitance is feeling awkward being new then I would maybe suggest finding a few churches to try and then pursue one for a couple of months to let him warm up. I know what it's like to feel uncomfortable and unworthy of being in a church because I didn't know the traditions and my knowledge of the faith just couldn't compare. From my perspective now I see how crazy that sounds, but truly it's a fear and pretty common one I think. So if helping him over that hump gets you all to church as a family it might be worth it. That still doesn't totally resolve the denominational issue but you also have to evaluate what you desire for your faith journey personally and as a family.

[mishka29]

I was raised Catholic as well but stopped going to mass in high school and basically haven't been back soon.

Now....I have no interest in going but just signed dd1 up for a catholic school. So at some point we are going to need to get her baptized and take her to church. Dh is not religious and has zero interest in this and probably won't ever attend with us. So it's all kinda on me which isn great since I'm not all that interested either.

For you I would just go without him. If he actually wants to come then he can put a smile on his face. I'm guessing it's considered rude to play on your phone during the service? Lol

[lilyelayne]

10 minutes past bedtime and we're headed down to the beach to look for crabs. Hope this isn't a terrible idea.

dreemkin I'll come back after bedtime and chime in re: church as I have a similar situation.

[lilyelayne]

dreemkin I tl;dr listen to kartish!

grew up in a household where mom and the kids went to church every single Sunday and dad never did. I grew up Lutheran which has a lot of structure, like the Catholic faith, and had a very positive experience as a kid/teen. DH grew up southern baptist and had a terrible experience, so while he's Christian he hasn't been a churchgoer since his youth. Once we got married he started joining me for Christmas & Easter but still not the weekly service.

G and I go without him. But he is very supportive in getting up early, getting G ready, being positive about church. Most every week I invite DH to come too, and he turns me down. I won't push it unless at some point the kid(s) decide that church is dumb/useless/etc because daddy doesn't go.

Completely agree with everything kartish said about a separate conversation that you're going to mass and making it a habit, he's welcome to join but if not you won't hold it against him. Just help you get the girls ready and out the door on time! (And if you're worried, that he not undermine church in front of the girls as a dull dreaded obligation.)

I imagine it's more difficult to wrangle two kids solo during the service, especially so young, who aren't used to it. Or even who are :-P G and I talk about church and what to expect a bit throughout the week and very much in the car ride over.
Sometimes we stand, sometimes we sit. Sometimes we listen, sometimes we pray. If you need to tell me something, you whisper. We go to church to learn about God and Jesus. We listen to Father Bill when he talks. We whisper. We whisper. We whisper.

I find in denominations that traditionally encourage children to be in the sanctuary at all ages, the congregation is much more tolerant when your kid isn't silent, still, etc. They only learn by being there.

[kartish]

Man this morning I was up before both kids, so instead of getting ready for work I lounged around instead. It was nice but now I'll have to work later. Still worth it I think.

[lilyelayne]

It rained this morning so it's kinda chilly. We played in the hot tub and now we're going to lunch, if my friend ever finishes getting ready ;-)

[mishka29]

We had gymnastics at 9 this morning which I only realized at 8:56. Ugh. So we scrambled like crazy people and made the mad dash. Later dd1 asked me if I was still mad. I explained that mad dash is just an expression. Dh stayed home bc he was having some me time today playing cards with friends.

Right now however I'm pissed off bc he told me they would be done at 3. I call at 3 and then he asks someone what time they are done and he says 5. He was supposed to be home in time to BBQ. I HATE when someone tells me something and doesn't live up to it. If it were an honest mistake that would be one thing but he just told me 3 even when he didn't really have any idea when it finished. One nut punch coming up for sure!

[lilyelayne]

mishka29 sorry about your H; hope you still get to BBQ! I laughed at your daughter. Reminded me of G the other day. I told him he had another tooth break through, and he said "my teeth are broken? I need new ones."

[dreemkin]

Thanks for all the advice regarding church. We had a talk about it last night. I said I'd love for him to come but if he's going to make it a negative thing, then I can just go with the girls. It wouldn't bother me as long as we keep the idea of church/religion positive. He said he understands and would work on acting more positively bc he wants it to be a family activity for the girls' sake. He admitted that he has some almost anxiety about the girl not behaving and then bother people or drawing unwanted attention. But the girls have always behaved very well and we sit toward the back so we can pop into the vestibule or cry room if needed so I don't know why he feels that way. I think for now it's resolved and we will be going more often.

Thanks for the prep idea lilyelayne. And I'll just have to keep some fresh (quiet) toys in the bag for A. She gets a little antsy toward the end. N loves church and praying so she totally gets how to behave!

[dreemkin]

mishka29 I wouldn't like that either!

Today we met a work friend of H's and his family at the zoo. Their daughter is in between our daughters' ages and they all had a good time! They left early due to a nap but we stayed for a bit longer. It was nice to have daddy there with us for a change 😁 Another family was supposed to go too but unfortunately their one son had a rash and then they think a reaction to an antibiotic and had swelling of lips/extremities. Scary. He is on the mend now thankfully. Andplusalso, despite walking miles around the zoo, I got my workout in tonight too! And then gave DH a haircut. And now I'm rambling 🤔 and will go to bed 😪

[seamonster]

Using the excuse of worrying about the girls' behavior seems silly since you take them alone each week. If you did want to try a different denomination to see if he'd be more comfortable, Lutheran (ELCA) and Episcopalian are like Catholic-lite so they might appeal to both of you.

I haven't been to church since Christmas Eve. H is a staunch atheist and it's a struggle to get out of the house. My friend invited us to the Unitarian church, but the service is late for not messing with car naps.