PAIF/PgAL check-in 4/24

[bepandnick]

One less week to go! How is everyone doing this week?

[bepandnick]

My appointment with my MFM last week was not kind to my PgAL brain. Baby looked great, so that was awesome. S/he is measuring 2 weeks ahead ahead and is already 3 lbs, so if we go early that's good news too. But cord issues, kick counts, extra monitoring and NSTs have me stressed out. Like we went through so much to get here, and now there's a real possibility something could still happen to this baby. 😔

[MissSally]

bepandnick I'm so sorry. It just seems like there is never rest. PgAL brain sucks the life out of you.

I have nothing that I need to worry about... but for some reason I'm getting crazy anxious especially with my shower next weekend. I keep having these moments of anxiety where I worry that I'm going to have all of this baby stuff, and then something will happen and seeing all of it will kill me. It seems so negative, and just an awful way of thinking, but I can't help but worry. I've seen too many bad things happen late in pregnancies, and with the PgAL brain myself... it just sucks. I feel so jaded. I want the innocence back. I miss being pregnant with DD when I could just look forward to her future, and being born, and never worrying for a second that anything could happen. I keep thinking that the further along I get, the better it will be. But for some reason it seems to be opposite. I'm so thankful for the baby kicks, and the little reminders that he is in there. I sit in my glider and repeat mantras when I start to get anxious, and that helps me a lot. Its almost like he knows when I start to worry, because he will roll around or give me a few kicks, as if he is saying "hi! I'm here still!" and I love that.

[bepandnick]

((MissSally)). PgAL sucks