Funny things your three year old says

[JoBub]

We just woke up and I asked Bub not to go downstairs by himself. He said "But mom, I gotta go check on dad! He's lonely!" Turns out H was already down there.

[microworm]

I call ds1 Bubby sometimes but apparently all of a sudden he doesn't like it. So whenever I say it he screams "I not BUBBBYYYYY!" Then I asked him what he wanted to me called. He thought for a moment. "I.....Monsterrrr!!"

[lrmrtn]

microworm, we've called DS Boogee since he was 6 months old. Now when we call him that, he angrily says "I not Boogee, I (DS's name)!" I think a few weeks ago DC focused in teaching the kids how to spell their names...

[Doll15]

C does the same thing with nicknames now. "I not Doll, I Chloe!"

[footloose]

lrmrtn Doll15 Weird because this is exactly what Peyton says now too. I called her PeyPey a few times and she was so mad.

Also, I gave her a cookie one afternoon and she said "You're giving this to me??" All shocked. I said yes. She asked why. I said "Oh, I don't know, you're just lucky"

She was shocked and exclaimed "I'm not lucky! I am not a WIGGLE! I am Peyton!"

I was so confused until I realized that was one of the Wiggles names 😂. I don't pay attention

[SpinsOffResonance]

DD: we're not animals, mommy!
Me: well actually humans are animals.
DD: no we're not, we're not like birds or dogs, WE''RE NOT ANIMALS, NO WE'RE NOT, WE'RE NOT ANIMALS!!!! (Cue hysteric meltdown)

[lulu]

This isn't from my 3 year old but my 10 year old...

It was DD2's baptism and I made cards for guests to write a message for her and put into a box to open when she's 18.

Back home, I sifted through them as I wanted a wee read before putting them away.

I found the card from DD1...

Dear DD2

When you are old, be good at the bar and don't smoke!!

Love DD1.

WTF???!!!!!

[activebaby]

Jun 13, 2017 9:26:57 GMT -5 mary97 said:

DD has been doing that I'm not as well. Tell her that she's silly and we get "I'm not silly, I'm first and last name".

Our last name is difficult. Ds tells me his full name, but sometimes pronounces our last name wrong. When I correct him he gets very upset and tell me "Ms. teacher tell me (wrong pronunciation." Which I have to tell him his teacher is wrong. Then he gets upset.
He also came home yesterday saying:
Ds: we don't make guns. We don't play with guns.
Me: who told you about guns and not playing with them?
Ds: we learn it at school
This is an interesting 3 year old convo to have...

[meggypoo1]

activebaby yikes I would be asking questions about the guns

[emmygirl]

activebaby, DH was playing with a nerf gun not long ago and DD said that you shouldn't play with guns too and that they're not toys. Her teacher had also taught her it. I personally have no problem with it. If it keeps her from picking up one she finds somewhere heaven forbid, then great. I know boys will be boys and find things like sticks to make into guns and I get that it's play but don't see harm in the education of gun safety. If that's what you'd call it. It's sad that three year olds know it but one less story of a kid shooting them self or a sibling on accident is ok with me.

[activebaby]

I'm not opposed to him being taught safety. I was just surprised. They also taught him about college. He came home telling me he was going to college and told me his teachers taught him that too

[meggypoo1]

Yeah if it's coming from the teachers fine but if he saw something then I would want to know

[lulu]

We have no gun culture here (well unless you are a mad serious gang member or a farmer), but boys just seem to know about them.

DS runs around making an odd swoosh noise and zapping people. He is either being Spider-Man or Buzz Lightyear - neither have actual guns but DS behaves like he is shooting people. Then he rolls along the ground and pretends to be dead....how does he know this??

He shouts at us to "spell me spell me", which means he wants us to zap him. I think he confuses it with a magic spell and a wand, but again it's like a gun.

He's just a ball of toddler confusion, has never seen a gun or even had a water pistol. But I'm not worried - it's just roll play and imagination and I'm okay with that.

[BurritosAtEveryMeal]

DS was using a little plastic toy like a stethoscope. He put it on one of my boobs.
DS: I a doctor. I see your belly.
Me: That's not my belly. This is my belly.
DS: No. (And continues)
DS: (spots my other boob) whoa! Mama have 2 bellies!
Me: No. That's not my belly this is my belly.
DS: Nope. Mama have 2 bellies. Whoa! No, 3! Mama have 3 bellies! Whoa!

Uhh notsomuch.

[kittyriot]

Heading up to bed tonight I said..

"I love you little nut"

And O looked up at me and said "I love you little Mommy"!

LOL. I'll take it!!

[savigirl]

Jun 10, 2017 16:59:07 GMT -5 activebaby said:

Ds: mom put the baby on your boob.
Me: but he's not hungry
Ds: mom just put baby on your boob
Me: umm no

MH used to say this when DD would cry and he didn't know what else to do!

[savigirl]

DD doesn't like when I call her sassy or silly, but she does think her name shortened is okay! Thankfully!

We had her family birthday party on a Sunday and real birthday on Wednesday, but she was confused on Wednesday morning and said "mom, I already had my birthday on Sunday!" Poor thing was so confused, but then excited for more cake and singing!

[athn64]

Today, DD1 took off her skirt after she went to the potty and promptly told me: I can't wear my skirt. It no work.

[rainbowsockmonkey]

Dd1 calls our dog Ruff. The dogs name is Emma. She can kind of say Emma (comes out as Umma).

[niko8083]

So this morning B puts the couch pillows around me and told me I was locked in a cage. When I asked why, she said I was bad cause I broke the house...ok kid lol.

[rainbowsockmonkey]

"Mama knee how?" (Mama need help?)

[britab]

The radio was on.

This song:
By the way, by the way
You do things to my body.
I didn't know I was starving
Until I tasted you!

DD: Who did she eat? Did she eat herself or somebody else?

I guess it's kiddy songs all the time now.

[lrmrtn]

BurritosAtEveryMeal, last night DS came into my room with me as I was getting changed. He grabbed my boob and said "mommy's belly!" I said no, that's mommy's boob. He then said "no, it's not, it's your belly!"

[JoBub]

Me: time to put your clothes on!
Him: no I want to save my clothes for later
Me: how much later? (He usually asks for like 5 more minutes)
Him: 24 hours later!

[haykay13]

"Mom you should put peanut butter in your coffee! I think that would be SO yummy!!" While rubbing his belly haha

[springbeduk]

A couple days ago dd lifted up her shirt and looked at her belly and said "why's my belly so big?" ( Which it isn't really but dh had said something similar about it the day before, ggrrrrr). But then she went on and said, "it's​ like mommy's​ belly. It's big like​ mommy's belly!"
Yay. 😕🙄

[springbeduk]

Yesterday we were out past nap time so she was getting grumpy and got mad when I tried to get her to go potty. So then she plops down on the floor and huffs, " I don't like you! I like the toilet!" And kinda cuddles up to it. (Eeew! Though at least we were at the library and the bathroom is actually pretty clean)

[comicSans]

Dd says she has a baby in her tummy, and den it's gonna go poof right out into da hospital.

[lrmrtn]

The other day we were outside playing and DS said "I love my house" and hugged the railing on the stairs.

springbeduk, DS tells me I have a big belly all the time. Thanks, kid.

[activebaby]

"OH JESUS"
I definitely don't say this. I asked where he learned it. He told me he likes Jesus so he says it. Definitely 3 year old logic.
He was saying DAMMIT too but it's rare now. I am in trouble for that one.