Not my kid, but my 4yo nephew. While babysitting he tells me that "his penis is silly and that it makes him run fast." Clearly this why I'm not a great runner; wrong parts.
Post by daometjing on Jan 19, 2015 22:52:32 GMT -5
My 1 year old is newly obsessed with dolls. As soon as she sees one, she whispers "baby" and wants to hug it. We were at play group today and an 8 week old was crying while her mother was making a bottle. I picked her up to comfort her. DD walked up to us, looked at the baby, and said "kitty?"
Apparently baby is her word for doll, and has no relationship with actual babies.
I remembered another one. We went hiking yesterday and accidentally ended up on a trail that was mostly uphill. We got pretty far and I suggested she stop and take a picture (so I could get a break). She called my bluff so I had to confess. She said, "You know why you're tired? Because you're a couple of old grandmas! Let's get MOVING!"
Post by bakingbetty on Jan 19, 2015 23:31:19 GMT -5
My son has discovered his penis can and does "stick up" from time to time. He causes him great distress. We were in the grocery store this week where he proceeded to talk the cashier's ear off about how his "penis was sticking up" this morning. Doh! She died laughing, thank god.
Whenever my daughter sees Cookie Monster she puts her hands to her mouth and says nom nom nom while shaking her head.
Haha, this is amazing!
Mine does the Count laugh and the Ernie laugh, and for Cookie Monster she does a sort of guttural growl - she is trying to say "Cookie" the way he does. I think I need to teach her your daughter's method, though.
Post by Cherhorowitz on Jan 20, 2015 0:16:28 GMT -5
My 3lb teacup Pomeranian has been avoiding my 14 month old since he became mobile. Today he decided he finally wanted to play with him. So he got in puppy pounce mode and started barking, my son would put his finger up to his lips and shush him (what I do when the dogs bark). My dog kept running up and kissing my son, who would break out in giggles. Finally, my dog went over to my kid's toy box, brought over a stuffed animal and he played tug of war with my son.
If you look at DD and say I dont know or all gone...she shrugs her shoulders, and puts her hands out to her sides...and just keeps doing it...Its so funny...
She also likes to say...Ahhh shit....Yep, thats my 17m old
DS (2.5) got a train table for Christmas. It's in his room. My mom, who watches him during the day, has taken to covering it with a blanket at nap time and telling him the trains need to sleep so he'll go to sleep.
The other night, I told him it was time for bed and he grabbed one of his blankets, took it over to the table, and started to cover it, saying "nee-nee doe," which is Nolanese for "night night train."
Post by sparklegrump on Jan 20, 2015 1:49:44 GMT -5
DS (3) got a cowboy hat and boots from my dad for Christmas. The other day he forgot it when we went to daycare. He looked up and me and said sadly, "I'm just a cowboy without my hat."
"I can't fathom a reason that you'd lie. But people also inject cement and superglue in their asses, so sometimes I'm just at a loss about people's decision-making abilities."-rocksforludo
I'm usually a lurker but I've really been enjoying reading all of these!
When my older daughter was much younger we were in a craft store and she saw a small foam cross sticker laying on the floor. She stopped dead in her tracks, her eyes got wide, she looked at me and gasped, "Look! A God plus!"
My son is 2 and loves construction toys. He has been naming them lately. He made them sleep by putting them on their sides and told me, mommy all my big machines are sleeping. He also loves to pretend he's making food. He has his big machines eat pancakes. The big machines also have time outs.
You so need to get him the book Goodnight Goodnight Construction Site. It is so cute and about the trucks going to sleep.
My son is 2 and loves construction toys. He has been naming them lately. He made them sleep by putting them on their sides and told me, mommy all my big machines are sleeping. He also loves to pretend he's making food. He has his big machines eat pancakes. The big machines also have time outs.
You so need to get him the book Goodnight Goodnight Construction Site. It is so cute and about the trucks going to sleep.
He has that book and where do diggers sleep at night, and a book called Roadwork which he has memorized and he reads back to us.
Post by ShamyCooler on Jan 20, 2015 9:01:19 GMT -5
I was talking to DD about what we needed to get at the store, and she was giving me ideas of what she thought we needed. Then she said, "Do you need those blood things for your bagina?" It was a mix of hysterical & horrified.
Post by lucilleaustero on Jan 20, 2015 9:44:51 GMT -5
DD, 3.5 just loves DS, 4 months. THis morning, as I was in the bathroom, I heard her tell him that she loved him and would always keep the "mighty scary dragons" away from him. I am loving this sibling thing.
Also, her new obsession is things that are hot. Points at stove. "Das hohhhhhhht." Yes, the stove is hot. "Das hohhhhht?" No. The dog is not hot. "HOHHHHHT!!1!1!1!1!" Uh, k?
That's my kid too, I'm afraid she's going to be the next Paris Hilton. She lives going through her drawers. She pulls out clothes, brings them to me and says "hot!" This happens at least every morning.
DD, 3.5 just loves DS, 4 months. THis morning, as I was in the bathroom, I heard her tell him that she loved him and would always keep the "mighty scary dragons" away from him. I am loving this sibling thing.
This would make me happy cry (I'm such a sap for this stuff)
My dd is 4. When I woke her up for school this morning she said, "oh mama, I am just in love with sleep today." I wish she had felt that way on the weekend.
Post by theresat858 on Jan 20, 2015 14:10:34 GMT -5
We teach the real words for body parts in my house...so this conversation happened with my 2.5 year old after a shower (I shower with her):
N: "Mommy has a big gina. I have a little gina. Baby has a gina?" Me: "Yes, C is a girl and C has a vagina". N: "Daddy has a gina?" Me: "no, daddy doesn't have a vagina. Daddy has a penis". N: "I like penis." Me: ...hysterical laughter.
OK I have 1 more, because my kid is ridic and because toilets are out lyfe.
I was shopping at Target with my mom and my kid, and my kid was fast approaching nap time. DUN DUUUN. We were done checking out and walking towards the doors when my kid decided to dart away from me, because an open door + hallway = an invitation.
I ran like hell after her (had to throw my bags to my mom) and she managed to go down the hallway to the Men's Room, and run inside behind a guy. She's cackling the entire time. "Fuck you mom, I'm not sitting in the damn cart and I'll make you pay for even suggesting it!"
I yelled inside the Men's Room that a female was coming in to chase down the kid they just saw, gave them a few seconds and went in. 2 guys at the urinal were looking at me. One guy left quickly. I hear my kid alllll the way in the last stall, so I storm in after her. She throws a fit when I try to drag her out: she's plastering herself to the wall and screaming.
Then she licks it. My kid straight up licked the wall and thought it was hilarious. She put her face against the men's room wall with her tongue out and was throwing a shitfit as I tried to pry her off.
I carried her out football-style. Guys were standing outside the door. My mom was in laugh-tears. My kid was screaming and I needed to disinfect her mouth. My mom said I went in and a bunch of guys came out looking confused. It wasn't funny at the time, but its definitely going into LO's high school yearbook!
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