Family or In-Law Rants

[bendherova]

Mar 23, 2015 17:53:56 GMT -5 ladysif said:

My vent: My BIL proposed to his 2-year gf in January and they have decided to get married five weeks after baby's due date. Five weeks. Driving there is impossible because it is a 30+ hour drive (not including stops for breastfeeding every 2-3 hours) we have fly, and I am so pissed about the whole thing. They asked us if it would be a problem; our reaction was kind of like, well, it isn't ideal, but if we have to we can probably make it work, we'll have to check with the pediatrician. What are we supposed to say? We can't be the assholes who say no, you can't get married when you want to, but the fact that you even have to ask should tell you THIS IS A BAD IDEA FOR US. So now I have to travel and attend a wedding with a baby who can't even receive immunizations other than hep B before 6 weeks or start WWIII with the in-laws.

DH told MIL that DS1 definitely isn't coming. With DH likely in the wedding and the time difference, DS1 would last until between 6-7 p.m. at the wedding before hitting an utter meltdown because it would be so far past his bedtime. So I would have to leave with him and baby, whereas with baby I can at least stay for the whole thing. MIL is going to fight us on that decision and I think this is going to be the ultimate fight she and I ever have and I'm not looking forward to it. But I'm not budging. And, you know, finding a dress that fits 5 weeks post-partum and is easy access for breastfeeding every 2-3 hours. So pissed!

I'd send your DH as your family's ambassador to this wedding and say to hell with it. I'm also not willing to put my unvaxed kiddo on an airplane.

[belle0720]

Mar 23, 2015 17:53:56 GMT -5 ladysif said:

My vent: My BIL proposed to his 2-year gf in January and they have decided to get married five weeks after baby's due date. Five weeks. Driving there is impossible because it is a 30+ hour drive (not including stops for breastfeeding every 2-3 hours) we have fly, and I am so pissed about the whole thing. They asked us if it would be a problem; our reaction was kind of like, well, it isn't ideal, but if we have to we can probably make it work, we'll have to check with the pediatrician. What are we supposed to say? We can't be the assholes who say no, you can't get married when you want to, but the fact that you even have to ask should tell you THIS IS A BAD IDEA FOR US. So now I have to travel and attend a wedding with a baby who can't even receive immunizations other than hep B before 6 weeks or start WWIII with the in-laws.

DH told MIL that DS1 definitely isn't coming. With DH likely in the wedding and the time difference, DS1 would last until between 6-7 p.m. at the wedding before hitting an utter meltdown because it would be so far past his bedtime. So I would have to leave with him and baby, whereas with baby I can at least stay for the whole thing. MIL is going to fight us on that decision and I think this is going to be the ultimate fight she and I ever have and I'm not looking forward to it. But I'm not budging. And, you know, finding a dress that fits 5 weeks post-partum and is easy access for breastfeeding every 2-3 hours. So pissed!

In my mind baby could be here 2 weeks early(or even earlier) or 2 weeks late so I'm not committing to any plans in that 4 week time period. And if baby ends up being 2 weeks late then that would mean flying with a 3 week old baby, not to mention you have no idea how labor will go and how your body will recover. There is zero chance I would be attending that wedding! I would have told BIL that they of course can get married on whatever date that they choose, unfortunately it is just too soon after your due date and too far away to travel for you guys to make it.

[Bluedaisy]

DH told his mom that I had my glucose test this weekend and she said "Oh why does she has to do that?". DH told her it's routine and her response? "Well I didn't get one when I was pregnant!" DH just replied " You have had a child for 37 years....some things have changed."

[ladysif]

Mar 23, 2015 18:17:18 GMT -5 belle0720 said:

Mar 23, 2015 17:53:56 GMT -5 ladysif said:

My vent: My BIL proposed to his 2-year gf in January and they have decided to get married five weeks after baby's due date. Five weeks. Driving there is impossible because it is a 30+ hour drive (not including stops for breastfeeding every 2-3 hours) we have fly, and I am so pissed about the whole thing. They asked us if it would be a problem; our reaction was kind of like, well, it isn't ideal, but if we have to we can probably make it work, we'll have to check with the pediatrician. What are we supposed to say? We can't be the assholes who say no, you can't get married when you want to, but the fact that you even have to ask should tell you THIS IS A BAD IDEA FOR US. So now I have to travel and attend a wedding with a baby who can't even receive immunizations other than hep B before 6 weeks or start WWIII with the in-laws.

DH told MIL that DS1 definitely isn't coming. With DH likely in the wedding and the time difference, DS1 would last until between 6-7 p.m. at the wedding before hitting an utter meltdown because it would be so far past his bedtime. So I would have to leave with him and baby, whereas with baby I can at least stay for the whole thing. MIL is going to fight us on that decision and I think this is going to be the ultimate fight she and I ever have and I'm not looking forward to it. But I'm not budging. And, you know, finding a dress that fits 5 weeks post-partum and is easy access for breastfeeding every 2-3 hours. So pissed!

In my mind baby could be here 2 weeks early(or even earlier) or 2 weeks late so I'm not committing to any plans in that 4 week time period. And if baby ends up being 2 weeks late then that would mean flying with a 3 week old baby, not to mention you have no idea how labor will go and how your body will recover. There is zero chance I would be attending that wedding! I would have told BIL that they of course can get married on whatever date that they choose, unfortunately it is just too soon after your due date and too far away to travel for you guys to make it.

I know, and you are 100% right. I know this is completely crazy, trust me, and I have absolutely judged other people for doing it (including DH's other brother, who has traveled internationally with both their kids at 6 and 8 weeks respectively for no reason other than to introduce the baby to family... SO foolish IMO, but of course ammunition for MIL to tell me I worry too much and if they can do it internationally, I can do this trip). I talked to my OB and the pediatrician at length to try to find some good excuse, but I won't be allowed to go more than a week past my due date because of GD so baby will be at a minimum, 4 weeks and 2 days old. Just within the cutoff of what the pediatrician's general rule is, which is not earlier than 4 weeks. 

Ped did say it will depend on baby's health and weight gain and we'll do a weight check right before the trip, so there is a possibility baby and I won't be able to go depending on that and DH will be sent by himself. And of course, if I have issues post-partum I'm not going. BIL and future SIL have to understand that is a possibility and if they don't, they will when they have kids and I'll deal with the backlash. But in order to avoid WWIII, we have to make the effort because I don't have anything medical to back me up right now and it will be major drama if I refuse just because any reasonably normal person would think it is fucking insane to bring a 5ish-week-old on a plane to a wedding. We'll go so far as to buy a ticket for me and just waste it if we have to. The whole thing is so frustrating, this is the ONE and only thing that would guilt me into traveling. They laid it on thick, saying this is the only date available at the location they want and they have to wait until next summer otherwise which they'd rather not do because they want some time married before they start trying for kids. Basically they're being incredibly selfish and thoughtless. Which is not the way to endear themselves to me. Gah. 

tl;dr: You're absolutely right and I know it is incredibly stupid to go. 

[Bluedaisy]

Mar 23, 2015 19:57:22 GMT -5 ladysif said:

Mar 23, 2015 18:17:18 GMT -5 belle0720 said:

In my mind baby could be here 2 weeks early(or even earlier) or 2 weeks late so I'm not committing to any plans in that 4 week time period. And if baby ends up being 2 weeks late then that would mean flying with a 3 week old baby, not to mention you have no idea how labor will go and how your body will recover. There is zero chance I would be attending that wedding! I would have told BIL that they of course can get married on whatever date that they choose, unfortunately it is just too soon after your due date and too far away to travel for you guys to make it.

I know, and you are 100% right. I know this is completely crazy, trust me, and I have absolutely judged other people for doing it (including DH's other brother, who has traveled internationally with both their kids at 6 and 8 weeks respectively for no reason other than to introduce the baby to family... SO foolish IMO, but of course ammunition for MIL to tell me I worry too much and if they can do it internationally, I can do this trip). I talked to my OB and the pediatrician at length to try to find some good excuse, but I won't be allowed to go more than a week past my due date because of GD so baby will be at a minimum, 4 weeks and 2 days old. Just within the cutoff of what the pediatrician's general rule is, which is not earlier than 4 weeks. 

Ped did say it will depend on baby's health and weight gain and we'll do a weight check right before the trip, so there is a possibility baby and I won't be able to go depending on that and DH will be sent by himself. And of course, if I have issues post-partum I'm not going. BIL and future SIL have to understand that is a possibility and if they don't, they will when they have kids and I'll deal with the backlash. But in order to avoid WWIII, we have to make the effort because I don't have anything medical to back me up right now and it will be major drama if I refuse just because any reasonably normal person would think it is fucking insane to bring a 5ish-week-old on a plane to a wedding. We'll go so far as to buy a ticket for me and just waste it if we have to. The whole thing is so frustrating, this is the ONE and only thing that would guilt me into traveling. They laid it on thick, saying this is the only date available at the location they want and they have to wait until next summer otherwise which they'd rather not do because they want some time married before they start trying for kids. Basically they're being incredibly selfish and thoughtless. Which is not the way to endear themselves to me. Gah. 

tl;dr: You're absolutely right and I know it is incredibly stupid to go. 

I'm a plus one for send DH and stay home yourself, why cause yourself extra stress?  When DH and I got married we got tons of guilt from his family because we got married in the winter so his brother came but his SIL and their twins didn't (the twins were one and a half).  We totally understood them not coming to the wedding and their babies were way older.

[apollo11235]

Mar 23, 2015 19:57:22 GMT -5 ladysif said:

Mar 23, 2015 18:17:18 GMT -5 belle0720 said:

In my mind baby could be here 2 weeks early(or even earlier) or 2 weeks late so I'm not committing to any plans in that 4 week time period. And if baby ends up being 2 weeks late then that would mean flying with a 3 week old baby, not to mention you have no idea how labor will go and how your body will recover. There is zero chance I would be attending that wedding! I would have told BIL that they of course can get married on whatever date that they choose, unfortunately it is just too soon after your due date and too far away to travel for you guys to make it.

I know, and you are 100% right. I know this is completely crazy, trust me, and I have absolutely judged other people for doing it (including DH's other brother, who has traveled internationally with both their kids at 6 and 8 weeks respectively for no reason other than to introduce the baby to family... SO foolish IMO, but of course ammunition for MIL to tell me I worry too much and if they can do it internationally, I can do this trip). I talked to my OB and the pediatrician at length to try to find some good excuse, but I won't be allowed to go more than a week past my due date because of GD so baby will be at a minimum, 4 weeks and 2 days old. Just within the cutoff of what the pediatrician's general rule is, which is not earlier than 4 weeks. 

Ped did say it will depend on baby's health and weight gain and we'll do a weight check right before the trip, so there is a possibility baby and I won't be able to go depending on that and DH will be sent by himself. And of course, if I have issues post-partum I'm not going. BIL and future SIL have to understand that is a possibility and if they don't, they will when they have kids and I'll deal with the backlash. But in order to avoid WWIII, we have to make the effort because I don't have anything medical to back me up right now and it will be major drama if I refuse just because any reasonably normal person would think it is fucking insane to bring a 5ish-week-old on a plane to a wedding. We'll go so far as to buy a ticket for me and just waste it if we have to. The whole thing is so frustrating, this is the ONE and only thing that would guilt me into traveling. They laid it on thick, saying this is the only date available at the location they want and they have to wait until next summer otherwise which they'd rather not do because they want some time married before they start trying for kids. Basically they're being incredibly selfish and thoughtless. Which is not the way to endear themselves to me. Gah. 

tl;dr: You're absolutely right and I know it is incredibly stupid to go. 

In this case, I'd probably just buy the one ticket for DH, but tell the ILs you're planning/hoping to go, barring any complications. Then, go to the pediatrician, tell MIL baby isn't gaining quite fast enough for the ped to let you go, and stay home. I'd have no qualms using the doctor as a scapegoat to help keep the peace here while still doing the sane thing.

[mrskblack11]

Mar 23, 2015 11:19:44 GMT -5 honeybunches101 said:

Not baby related, but we are buying a house. A very, very small house. My MIL has saved every momento ever from her two sons. Every boy scout badge, little collection, happy meal toys, every school paper etc. Now that we are moving from our apartment into a house, she keeps telling me she is going to send a truck load of DH's stuff to our house for us to keep. Noooo!!! DH doesn't want any of his old stuff and has told her repeatedly to throw it away. They live several states away and we don't go down there often, but when we do we try to throw out as much of his old stuff as we can, but she somehow gets it out of the trash and saves it. I swear if a truck shows up at our house when I have a newborn and a 3 year old I will send it back and refuse to speak to her for months.

My parents guilt me in to taking a few thing anytime I see them. DH gets so mad because the stuff just sits in the garage. Most of the stuff I take is decor that has sentimental value, like my grandma's clock. But the clock is broken and needs to be fixed, so it just collects dust in the garage.

[bendherova]

Mar 23, 2015 20:54:07 GMT -5 apollo11235 said:

Mar 23, 2015 19:57:22 GMT -5 ladysif said:

I know, and you are 100% right. I know this is completely crazy, trust me, and I have absolutely judged other people for doing it (including DH's other brother, who has traveled internationally with both their kids at 6 and 8 weeks respectively for no reason other than to introduce the baby to family... SO foolish IMO, but of course ammunition for MIL to tell me I worry too much and if they can do it internationally, I can do this trip). I talked to my OB and the pediatrician at length to try to find some good excuse, but I won't be allowed to go more than a week past my due date because of GD so baby will be at a minimum, 4 weeks and 2 days old. Just within the cutoff of what the pediatrician's general rule is, which is not earlier than 4 weeks. 

Ped did say it will depend on baby's health and weight gain and we'll do a weight check right before the trip, so there is a possibility baby and I won't be able to go depending on that and DH will be sent by himself. And of course, if I have issues post-partum I'm not going. BIL and future SIL have to understand that is a possibility and if they don't, they will when they have kids and I'll deal with the backlash. But in order to avoid WWIII, we have to make the effort because I don't have anything medical to back me up right now and it will be major drama if I refuse just because any reasonably normal person would think it is fucking insane to bring a 5ish-week-old on a plane to a wedding. We'll go so far as to buy a ticket for me and just waste it if we have to. The whole thing is so frustrating, this is the ONE and only thing that would guilt me into traveling. They laid it on thick, saying this is the only date available at the location they want and they have to wait until next summer otherwise which they'd rather not do because they want some time married before they start trying for kids. Basically they're being incredibly selfish and thoughtless. Which is not the way to endear themselves to me. Gah. 

tl;dr: You're absolutely right and I know it is incredibly stupid to go. 

In this case, I'd probably just buy the one ticket for DH, but tell the ILs you're planning/hoping to go, barring any complications. Then, go to the pediatrician, tell MIL baby isn't gaining quite fast enough for the ped to let you go, and stay home. I'd have no qualms using the doctor as a scapegoat to help keep the peace here while still doing the sane thing.

absolutely have the doctor make up some fake excuse as to why baby can't travel. and only buy the one ticket for your DH.

[ladysif]

You ladies speak reason, thank you for making me not feel like I'm overreacting. I think I have to play along for now to keep the peace and then back out last minute for health reasons. If we were driving, I'd feel a lot better about it, but I would never forgive myself if baby caught something awful on the plane. We'd also be stuck in a very expensive city if he DID need medical help/hospitalization, and that's a huge risk. I'm fine with sending DH (unless baby is in NICU or something like that). Hate that we're in this position. Thanks ladies.

[jcprn]

Mar 23, 2015 21:26:09 GMT -5 ladysif said:

You ladies speak reason, thank you for making me not feel like I'm overreacting. I think I have to play along for now to keep the peace and then back out last minute for health reasons. If we were driving, I'd feel a lot better about it, but I would never forgive myself if baby caught something awful on the plane. We'd also be stuck in a very expensive city if he DID need medical help/hospitalization, and that's a huge risk. I'm fine with sending DH (unless baby is in NICU or something like that). Hate that we're in this position. Thanks ladies.

I would do this if I were in your situation. Just tell them your pediatrician doesn't want you traveling that early with them on a plane, that far away, etc. Your inlaws don't need to know what your pediatrician really says. They can hem and haw as much as they want but it's not their decision. And it's not like your BIL would cancel his wedding just because you couldn't be there so I don't know why they would care so much. PLUS YOU WOULD HAVE JUST HAD A BABY lol. I don't think anyone (else) would fault you for not coming. If you're not comfortable taking a 4-5 week old on a plane ride to a wedding then you shouldn't.

[Widget123]

Late to the party, but IMO ladysif i dont think you should even waste your money buying yourself a ticket. Add me to the list of people saying the baby will be too young, send your DH and stay at home. Good luck with the whole situation nevertheless.

[jcprn]

My MIL is having a melt down because they're moving in with HER inlaws one town over from where they are now. I know it sucks and lord knows I would hate to move in with them when I'm their age but they are really benefiting from the situation. They have no savings. No retirement plan. They won't have to do anything except help out FIL's parents. My FIL works 2 jobs and even though I feel bad for him because that sucks he still buys cars all the time; he'll buy, trade, sell anything because he's never satisfied with what he has. He buys a truck, has it for a few months, then gets frustrated that he's spending so much on gas, then buys an economy car and a few months later changes his mind and buys something else (a truck again or another car). In the almost 11 years I've been with DH he's owned probably over 20 different cars. My MIL put them in a worse position by being obsessed with QVC and buying ALL THE THINGS even just to send the stuff back because she "wanted to see it in person" (like, what?). Also she buys stupid nick-nacks all the time for herself and spends so much on stupid shit for her daughters and grandchildren that is so unnecessary.

So they're pocketing the money from selling their house and hopefully putting it towards savings/retirement. But my MIL has been annoying me so much, making comments like she's going to start drinking a lot, that my FIL still has an old prescription for Oxy that she's going to start taking, and that she hopes her inlaws "kick the bucket soon." On one hand I know that's her sense of humor but still I'm like um you're not making me want you around my newborn at all.

ANDPLUSALSO, my SIL due a few weeks behind me with her second child and she lives really far away and MIL tells me, "well you have to have your baby by this date because I'm going out visit her no matter what." Not that I want her around when I am giving birth/ immediately after but way to make your son's first child a second priority to your "favorite" child and favorite grandchild. She has come out and said "I love all my grandchildren but there's just something so special about so-and-so's daughter." Thanks, because my baby will just be chopped liver.

[Widget123]

jcprn LOL at all of that. I can only imagine moving in with ILs at that age and your SIL is just being ridiculous. In my experience if her daughter really is the favorite grandchild, a new baby isnt going to change that, at least definately not right away

[lunalovegood]

I've got a new one for today. DH and his sister had a falling out a couple years ago, but they have slowly been working on mending their relationship. I am one of those people who basically will write people off when they've wronged me so I have very different feelings about her.
My MIL calls last night to confirm days of when they will be coming to see the baby and mentions that SIL has talked to her about "not feeling wanted or invited to visit after the baby is born" SIL lives across the country and has never visited us. She, of course, has not asked DH if it would be ok, but instead does the childish thing of having her mom talk to DH about it.
I personally don't want her to stay with us, but I understand she is DH's sister, but I really feel like until she can grow the fuck up and talk to DH herself he shouldn't say anything about it.

[baytosa2013]

Wow ya'll have some doozies! My IL's are generally ok..MIL is a little passive aggressive but she will back off and generally just likes to hear herself complain. I doubt that I will have to worry about her coming out because her and her husband never have money. My SIL is supposed to be coming but I have yet to actually hear WHEN. I asked a couple of times with no real answer and I've tried to get DH to just ask her when he talks to her but he always "forgets" and says we will figure it out. I'm not a wait and figure it out kind of person, especially when I am going to be in a situation I have never been in before with an infant. I don't even know if she's planning to bring her 14yo daughter. I'm probably going to have to be the pushy asshole soon because it's April and no plane tickets or dates have been discussed. I'm totally fine if she doesn't make it out BTW...just sayin.

[Deleted]

I have an older brother here in the metro area. He doesn't make any attempt to communicate with us or my mom at all. We sent him & his wife our pregnancy announcement and he was the only family member who never acknowledged it. After much effort, I reached him by text message a couple of weeks ago so I could get his wife's email. I told him that my friends would be sending her an evite for my shower and that to make sure she knew her daughters were invited as well. I was right there talking to him about my pregnancy and he still didn't even acknowledge it. It's not that I want to be fawned over. I just find is so bizarre that he won't take two seconds to say congratulations. (She is in her late 40's and already has six kids and he's 52 so I seriously doubt it has anything to do with silent fertility issues on their end.) I'm just tired of making the effort to be part of a family with them when it's clear they have no interest in us at all.

[omgtree]

My parents live 2 minuets away and my IL's live 20. My mom has a lot of issues. She's passive aggressive and manipulative. A lot of it has to do with abandonment issues from being adopted and having abusive adoptive parents. She didn't stand a chance to be "normal" she is usually fine but she has her moments. My MIL is just clueless sometimes. I love her she's such a total sweet woman and doesn't tell me how to parent. She only gives advice if I specifically ask her for it. But she does do some odd things like doesn't change DD often enough, tried to help with laundry but she doesn't sort the clothes just throws it all in (she has ruined clothes this way)and the cloth diapers seemed to confuse her and she once put a dirty one back on DD. Or she ran the dishwasher when there was an inch of water at the bottom because it was clogged but she ran it anyway. She doesn't mean any harm she just isn't that great at helping lol. I'm very fortunate especially after ready what some of you girls go through jeez.

[wormgerm]

Just got a save the date for a pig roast from my aunt. It's on the same day my shower is scheduled, but she wouldn't know that yet so I can't hold it against her. She lives next door to my parents and I have seen her at Christmas and my nephew's first birthday party earlier this month. She hasn't acknowledged my pregnancy at all. We don't speak (apparently! Started at Christmas) because she's a drama queen. I don't feel like I need to go over to her to break the silence and like... throw my bump around hint hint. Totally with @jimbobcooter‌ on this one... I don't need her fake happy for me but it's weird to have an elephant in the room (me and my belly) and ignore it.

[jcprn]

Apr 1, 2015 12:14:58 GMT -5 @demanda88 said:

Bumping this thread because I need a little vent about my grandmother. She's 74 and doles out unsolicited advice, regardless of the fact that she has no clue what she's talking about. Last night she told me that even though my employer was giving me 14 weeks of maternity leave, I really only needed 4 and should seriously think about going back, at least part time, to "preserve" my job. Then, she starts going on about how my grandpa would get so frustrated when the women that were working for him took advantage of all the maternity benefits through the company and then ended up quitting and that I "owed" my employer and if I decided not to come back, I would burn a lot of bridges. THEN, she goes on to say that if I decided to become a SAHM, I wouldn't be holding up my end of the deal with my husband...whatever the hell that means.

She makes me want to scream. Neither of them have any idea what my job entails and they don't have any understanding of how employers operate now. Flexibility, working from home, and not having your career consume your entire life or be number one, is a completely foreign concept to them. Not to mention, it's none of her business at all, what I decide to do after the baby comes, how long of a leave I take, and when or whether or not I choose to leave.

You "owe" your employer but not your child? If you have the opportunity and desire to be with your child at the start of his/her life as long as you can, you should take it. What a weird perspective for her to have. And 4 weeks is nothing.

[mcp6286]

@demanda88, all my sympathy when it comes to dealing with insensitive grandmas! Don't you wish you could tell them where to shove it like you would anyone else who had the nerve to be so rude? lol

[cnumbers]

My brothers girlfriend - whose parenting skills from what I've heard are questionable, my mom always has to watch their 8 month old. It has been this way since not long after she was born. Anytime my mom does this, his girlfriend goes out drinking whilst he works, he also cares for her son from a previous relationship, as for her parenting my mom has told me that she doesn't pack enough diapers for the LO and constantly asks my mom for money to purchase milk. Now surely if you have money to go out then you should also have money for milk but I'm not going to pass judgement as I haven't met her and have only my mothers stories to go from. I don't see my brother often. It was my nephews 5th birthday party today, my brother attended with the 8 month old and her son - who was throwing a tantrum the whole time. My brother had lots of scratches across his face - like nails.. I'm thinking she maybe went BSC.. I dont know, anyway my mom told me his girlfriend asked her if I had blocked her on Facebook. I haven't, I have taken my account offline as I have no use for it at the moment and I think I plan to keep it that way until after LO is here. The girlfriend then said 'Oh, cause I was going to message her and say who the f*ck do you think you are stealing the name I was going to call my LO if she wasn't a girl' erm excuse me.. I have never met you in my life, nor did I know that you considered that name & if that's the case why didn't you call your first born by that name? I was just like are you for real! I have now regret even revealing the name to my mom as I know she would have told my brother who then told his girlfriend. From now on I'll keep the name to myself.. All it does is make people think it's okay to comment their opinion on it.

[bendherova]

I don't really have a vent about my Ils per se, other than having to travel 330mi to their house and back this weekend. H is able to come, fortunately, so I don't have to drive the whole thing myself. Depending on when H gets out of the OR today, we may be leaving tomorrow am. so, that means 12h in the car for 26h at their house. Super. n

[redlipz]

@demanda88 I'm so sorry about your grandfather. My grandfather was my best friend and I lost him 2 months ago. My in laws have yet to say anything to me.

[wegrowsheep]

I spent all day friday and saturday getting my parents' house cleaned up for Easter company (mom is out of town). DH helped some yesterday, but I swear every time I turn around he's dinking around on his phone or the computer. And he napped on the recliner yesterday for a couple hours while I worked outside. And then he gets all crabby when I ask him to please go outside with DS because I hurt everywhere because I completely overdid it yesterday. Stop acting so fucking exhausted while I grow a baby.

[Bluedaisy]

Apr 5, 2015 15:52:27 GMT -5 wegrowsheep said:

I spent all day friday and saturday getting my parents' house cleaned up for Easter company (mom is out of town). DH helped some yesterday, but I swear every time I turn around he's dinking around on his phone or the computer. And he napped on the recliner yesterday for a couple hours while I worked outside. And then he gets all crabby when I ask him to please go outside with DS because I hurt everywhere because I completely overdid it yesterday. Stop acting so fucking exhausted while I grow a baby.

Awe, I'm sorry.  I can't believe he wouldn't help more.

[Bluedaisy]

My sister is a total twit. She offered to host my shower and is now totally flaking because she "lives out of town", never mind the fact that she is planning a MASSIVE, fancy staggette for her friend in the same city where my shower would be and showers here basically consist of calling people, getting a fruit tray and a cake. I did a beautiful shower for her last year for her wedding and she can't be bothered to do anything for me.

She is also super jealous of everything I have. We're planning to put a deck on our house this summer so she's decided to do one. We got a BBQ (we didn't have one) and when my dad went to check it out with my DH my sister started talking all about how they need to get a new one this summer.

She spent her entire visit talking about her work and hardly asked anything about the baby. When she did ask about the baby she quickly changed the subject to be about the fact that if she's not pregnant within two years she'll "just adopt". OMG I don't know if it's just pregnancy hormones but everything she said all weekend made me roll my eyes.

[redlipz]

Apr 4, 2015 19:56:06 GMT -5 @demanda88 said:

Apr 4, 2015 17:15:13 GMT -5 redlipz said:

@demanda88 I'm so sorry about your grandfather. My grandfather was my best friend and I lost him 2 months ago. My in laws have yet to say anything to me.

I remember you posting about losing him- it's an awful thing to go through. Sorry your inlaws suck as much as mine do!

Yeah it really is.

My father in law is cool. So is my mother in law but she's just...special. Like in October when my granddaddy was in the hospital, I wanted to go visit him and help out by staying with him or with whatever I could. He lived in Mexico. So my husband planned to stay at her house for a week and was going to ask her if she could just take them to the babysitter in the morning. Well I told her that in case of an emergency I was just gonna have to go by myself and she proceeded to tell me that a good mom would never leave her kids, no matter how big the emergency and that I could find someone to help with the kids in Mexico...

When we knew my granddaddy was getting to the end, my husband asked her if they could stay at her house and she could take them to the sitter in the morning (she wasn't working at the time) since my husband goes to work at 4am. Her response: "no you can't stay here but you can bring them over before you go to work." We hardly ever ask for any favors and it's for this same reason, she can never do them for one reason or another. My mom on the other hand, is always there.

Oh this lady also blocked me on fb for no reason. I just know not to count on them and not to expect anything from them.

[leenziepops]

I had to resurrect this one to rant about my BIL. I invited MIL and BIL over for dinner on the weekend. I made a delicious atlantic salmon. Mid dinner BIL spits out a mouthful of salmon right on to his plate. He had a napkin right next to him! And he's fussing over almost swallowing a bone and goes "if i even have a bit of bone in my mouth I will stop eating. Mum knows this. It's so lucky I didn't feel it too much because I seriously would stop eating" .
Omfg. Firstly you are not 3, so grab a napkin if you need to get rid of food from your mouth. And boo hoo. A little fish bone? Seriously grow up. He has the most disgusting table manners. Elbows wide spread all over into his mum's personal space and he throws chicken bones and pork chop bones on his mum's plate when she's still eating. I hate being seated opposite him.

[bendherova]

leenziepops- how old is BIL?

Bc wowza rudeness!

[leenziepops]

Apr 20, 2015 6:42:25 GMT -5 bendherova said:

leenziepops- how old is BIL?

Bc wowza rudeness!

31!!!!!!!!