Calling all the med free mamas...

[carolyngrace]

Love the idea of this thread, thanks for starting it!!

I've shared elsewhere, but I watched my sister birth her two sons med-free at the midwife center where I plan to deliver. Watching her endure and really conquer (for lack of a better word) the whole experience was what convinced me to try and go med-free. Before that I was in the "give me all the meds!" camp. Her recovery was so fast in both cases, which is also appealing to me!

However, I have friends who have attempted to give birth in the same midwife center, labored for 24+ hours, and transferred to a hospital. One ended up with a c-section, the other with an epidural. So I feel like I have a realistic view that things can go "wrong" and I might not end up with the kind of birth I'm hoping for.

The thing that has made me feel the most prepared and confident about my birth was taking a class with an AMAZING doula. One, she went through a TON of different coping skills, positions, techniques to try during all the different stages of labor. But more than that, she was great at bringing DH and I together to really talk about what I think I'll need from him, how we want to handle different problems, etc. So I think being in a really good space with your birthing partner is important! And/or having a great doula there.

I know it will be harder for me to stay med-free if I end up in the hospital. Not because they'll be pushy or anything, but because the option is there. Also, in my particular hospital they don't have wireless monitoring, so I wouldn't be as free to move around, etc.

Either way things go I plan to stay home AS LONG as possible. My nurse friend will likely check me to make sure I'm at LEAST 5cm before I head in. (luckily I live 10 min from midwife center AND hospital).

[wink568]

FTM aiming for a med free delivery here. Haven't really written out a birth plan, but I plan on keeping it simple.

Honestly, I just took the regular birthing class offered by the hospital and it put me in such a good place mentally that it further solidified my feelings toward going med free. Even DH is feeling a hundred times better about the whole process after the class. Though they covered the interventions and everything, it seemed a lot of the labor coping techniques they taught were to support a med free labor, or at least get you as far along in the process as you're willing to go. I know it's all a simulation and I don't know what to really expect, but knowing methods to cope is a huge deal to me.

I do plan on going with the flow, allowing myself to say "not now" instead of a straight up "no" toward interventions if offered, though obviously that depends on the circumstance surrounding the reason for the intervention.

[noeliav]

I'll go grab my pain-med-free birth story from an older post, but quickly...
If you want to go pain-med free, you can do it. You can! And, there is nothing to be afraid of. The pain, the intensity, it's challenging, yes. But, there are breaks in between the contractions. There is time to recover and rest. And, it is all worth it. I felt *amazing* postpartum.

I think, imo, the most important things to have when pursuing a pain-med-free/low intervention birth are:
1) a 100% on-board, supportive care provider
2) some classes on coping methods (Bradley, hypnobabies, etc), and
3) a 100% on-board L&D partner (be it doula, sister, mother or partner)

Anything after that is gravy.

[noeliav]

Here's the story of DD's birth:
38w- I leave work for my appointment (Thanksgiving weekend) and my boss says "Have a nice break! But don't have that baby yet."
MW checks my belly and says "Oh do you feel that?" Nope. "It's a contraction. Don't worry, you will soon." She listens to DD's heartbeat on the doppler and says, "And do you hear how her heartbeat has slowed a bit? She's ready to be born." Me, thinking "Um, no. Not yet. Give me a couple more weeks, pleaseandthankyou."
Thanksgiving Day (38w1d)- I'm having contractions all day long, but don't notice them. A few weeks later, I'm looking over pictures from that day and there are a few where I'm very concentrated on my belly. Huh.
38w2d- I wake up early with a sense that Things Must Be Done NOW. I run around getting copies of our house key for my sister and our friends. I go to Target and buy holiday decor, plus ingredients for freezer meals and breakfast breads. I call my sister and invite her over for a cooking/baking party-- she thinks I'm joking. I am not.
We spend the whole day in the kitchen, with me slumped over the kitchen counter with a heating pad on my back for my "annoying cramps." My sister and DH keep carefully suggesting that I, maybe, perhaps, start timing the cramps. You know, but only if I feel like it. (lol, apparently, I was a tad grouchy.) I refuse because why would I time "annoying cramps?!" My sister goes home about 8pm-ish and tells DH to call her when I'm ready to go to the hospital.
I take a bath around 9pm. I get out around 9:30pm because I ran out of hot water (so annoying). I try to go to bed but cannot because these annoying cramps are... well... annoying. I practice using the contraction timer because I'm not sleeping anyway, but it turns out I cannot focus on the annoying cramps and use the timer at the same time. I wander downstairs at about 10pm to hand DH the contraction timer and end up on my knees hugging the ottoman during the next "annoying cramp." I go to the bathroom and see lots of bloody show. Holy crap. DH runs upstairs to shower. I admit that, possibly, this is labor and go to finish packing our labor bag. My water breaks shortly thereafter and we get to the hospital around 11:00/11:30pm.
It is intense, the contractions. I'm vocalizing plenty during each one. The nurses (all 3 of them) each make multiple attempts at placing the IV in my hand (I'm GBS+) before giving up and putting it in my elbow crook. This sucks. They make me "read" (hahahaha) and "sign" (hahahahahaheffingha) paperwork, even though I've preregistered. A nurse tells me to "be quieter." I tell her to "shut up" and DH to "get her out of here." Finally we're all settled in with a nice (read: supportive) two-nurse team, and I hunker down to work through each contraction. 3:00am and I start to grunt right as one of my nurses is monitoring the fetus. "Are you pushing?" "I'm not doing anything! My body is!" "If you feel that again, you call us right away." The next contraction, my body is definitely bearing down so I tell DH to get the nurse right away. The nurse works with me through some pushing contractions, then the OB arrived and we pushed out DD. She was born at 4:07am. Perfect.

[wifedeangel]

STM here-- if you want to go med free, you really really super need to have some pain management strategies in place before you go into labor. And you need to practice them for a little everyday so they are second nature to you by the time you do go into labor. Whether you do Bradley, Hypnobabies, Lamaze, or whatever, you really need to get on it pronto. I practice meditating, envisioning going to my happy place, and repeating my birth mantras. (Actually all mamas, except those with a planned CS, need to have some of this in place, on the off chance you have issues with the epi, or you labor too fast to get an epi).

My first labor was really fast, and intense. Basically I went into transition almost immediately, which freaked me out, thinking I was going to have to deal with that level
Of pain for hours. Trying to relax and give in to the contractions, and riding them like a wave helped me a lot. Also relying on the strength of my H. You don't have do this alone, help is always good.

It also helps to let go of any preconceived notions of "keeping your dignity". Birth is natural and primitive. It's acceptable and beautiful to let your body do what it needs to do, however it needs to do it. (I only say this because as a very independent and stubborn woman, I knew I could handle this easily. Um. No)

Also, it's not a failure if after several hours, you're tired and can't deal anymore and need some relief and get the epi. Or your baby needs forceps or you need an emergency CS. The goal is a healthy baby.

[noeliav]

As for why I chose to go pain-med-free the first time: I heard and observed outcomes from epidurals that I knew, without a doubt, I did not want to experience.

My mom had 3 pain-med-free labors and deliveries, the last one a pitocin birth. Hearing her talk about the differences between the first two births and her augmented L&D, I knew that I would do whatever was in my power to avoid an augmented birth and, part of that, would be avoiding pain-meds.

So, all that together, pushed me to research "natural" childbirth. The more I read, and the more I talked to other like-minded mamas, the more I felt that I could do it. Pre-TTC, I looked for and found a very "natural birth" friendly OB/MW collaborative, and they helped guide us along the way during pregnancy and through L&D.

Having had our pain-med-free L&D (I was GBS+), I advocate for every woman to consider it. It is truly (and easily) in my top 3 life experiences.

[noeliav]

Mar 23, 2015 12:06:52 GMT -5 wifedeangel said:

STM here-- if you want to go med free, you really really super need to have some pain management strategies in place before you go into labor. And you need to practice them for a little everyday so they are second nature to you by the time you do go into labor. Whether you do Bradley, Hypnobabies, Lamaze, or whatever, you really need to get on it pronto. I practice meditating, envisioning going to my happy place, and repeating my birth mantras. (Actually all mamas, except those with a planned CS, need to have some of this in place, on the off chance you have issues with the epi, or you labor too fast to get an epi).

My first labor was really fast, and intense. Basically I went into transition almost immediately, which freaked me out, thinking I was going to have to deal with that level
Of pain for hours. Trying to relax and give in to the contractions, and riding them like a wave helped me a lot. Also relying on the strength of my H. You don't have do this alone, help is always good.

It also helps to let go of any preconceived notions of "keeping your dignity". Birth is natural and primitive. It's acceptable and beautiful to let your body do what it needs to do, however it needs to do it. (I only say this because as a very independent and stubborn woman, I knew I could handle this easily. Um. No)

Also, it's not a failure if after several hours, you're tired and can't deal anymore and need some relief and get the epi. Or your baby needs forceps or you need an emergency CS. The goal is a healthy baby.

I wanted to hat tip on that, especially. As my Bradley instructor said throughout our classes, *any* amount of "natural" L&D is beneficial for the mom and baby.

[wormgerm]

FTM planning a go with the flow med free birth. I will be birthing at a holistic birth center attached to the hospital. I am in the care of certified nurse midwives. I can labor in the tub but due to my BMI I have to deliver out of the water. If I can't hang I can have iv pain meds or an epidural. The hospital offers a bunch of classes and I'm signed up for ways to avoid a c-section, birth and infant care, methods for med free birth.

Hopefully everything goes smoothly but the reality is I don't have control over any of this. All I can do is seek out education to try to prepare.

[hbanana18]

Great thread!

I am FTM planning on trying to go med free. I realize this night change so I am open to med options but really going to try to not go that route.

My hospital has tubs, birthing balls, bars, etc and my OB is supportive of Med free. There are 4 midwives with the practice as well. We are taking birthing class, as well as a comfort measures during labor class that teaches your partner ways to alleviate discomfort.

MH is very supportive of whatever I want to do. Goal at the end is a baby, and we trust ourselves and doctors to make whatever decisions we need to have a healthy delivery.

I mostly want to go this route because it seems everyone has a much easier recovery from med free.

[effthisnoise]

@pcrunk, from the labor stories that I've read, a common factor in reducing interventions is keeping the laboring mom calm and as stress-free as possible. Which isn't to say that you need candlelight or Jeff Bridges singing you lullabies in the corner to calm you down. But you can try to prepare in advance and figure out what your preferences are and try to eliminate things/people that might cause you stress. I think it's cool that both you and your fiancé want your mom in the room for support--the idea of my mother (whom I love) being within five miles of the hospital while I'm in labor stresses me out considerably even now, with three months to go (I really hate the idea of people waiting on me for something). I'm still putting together exactly what I prefer for giving birth (since there are no guarantees) and reducing my stress is top of the list.

[Deleted]

I hope to go med free this time but I am, by no means, married to that plan. As my doc said when I discussed it with him, it sometimes depends on how long labor is, 5 hours being easier to get through than 30 hours. And the last several weeks, when I was so sick from acid reflux, vomiting, and completely weak and exhausted from not getting any nutrition, I was sadly resigned to the fact that I wouldn't have the strength to do it. But now that I'm feel well again, I'm feeling more confident about trying. I have no illusions that it will be easy but want to focus on the positive stories of those that have gone before me, instead of buying into the fear culture that seems so prevalent.

I haven't done any classes but I've spent a great deal of time home studying the different techniques for focusing and pain management, bradley, hypno babies, etc. Ina May's books have been very helpful as well, with her stories of random things that have worked for other women, such as relaxing your face and jaw, envisioning opening up and getting bigger, and especially her chapter on our view, as a society, that pain = bad and therefore painful childbirth must be bad, when it actually isn't... even though, yes, it hurts. And I've mentioned before how much I love her notion of letting your inner "monkey," or primal instinct, just take over. I do as much practicing of breathing techniques as possible when I'm just sitting around (and this may sound strange, but especially when I'm using the bathroom since I already know pushing feels much like pooping and many women end up laboring on the toilet because it's such a comfortable, natural position) and try to spend as much time as I can just focusing my mind on the various techniques and envisioning myself working through a variety of situations.

I am also comforted by the fact that I was at my hospital for IV fluids twice in the past couple of weeks and was able to talk to the LD nurses and find that they are supportive of med free choices, if that's what the mom wants.

Thank you so much for starting this thread.

[noeliav]

@pcrunk
I think one of the things that helped move my labor along was that I kept drinking (well, sipping) water and DH kept urging me to go to the restroom (and helped me physically get there). I was in bed quite a bit, but every hour or so, I was also up walking back and forth to the potty.

In labor and delivery, make gravity your friend

[tiffbot]

My plan with DS was epidural. I didn't take any birthing or prenatal classes, just went to the hospital tour and they showed you how the epidural is done if you want it.

Well, I certainly wasn't indicating a premature baby on a weekend when the maternity ward/hospital in general was overfull and they were literally scrambling for doctors and had one anaestesiologist on.

I didn't give birth in a delivery room as there wasn't one open, I didn't have an epidural as my labour progressed very fast and he just never got to me, I didn't do immediate skin to skin or BFing as they whisked him to NICU. And wouldn't you know the scariest thing looking back was just the fact I was delivering at 33 weeks and didn't know what to expect from him. A nurse held my hand and breathed and talked me through every contraction, she kept me awake when I started to pass out, ya it was painful but that was the least of my worries at that point. The adrenaline rush when it was over can't be compared to anything. I remember even holding my breath until I heard DS cry.

So, there's a part of me that is ready to do med free again. There's a part of me that is looking for a more relaxed/less urgent experience and ready to just get the epi. It will definitely be a game time decision. But I did it without any classes or a midwife/doula, and I'm still happy with the decisions I made during his pregnancy not to do them.

[Deleted]

Mar 23, 2015 13:20:33 GMT -5 tiffbot said:

My plan with DS was epidural. I didn't take any birthing or prenatal classes, just went to the hospital tour and they showed you how the epidural is done if you want it.

Well, I certainly wasn't indicating a premature baby on a weekend when the maternity ward/hospital in general was overfull and they were literally scrambling for doctors and had one anaestesiologist on.

I didn't give birth in a delivery room as there wasn't one open, I didn't have an epidural as my labour progressed very fast and he just never got to me, I didn't do immediate skin to skin or BFing as they whisked him to NICU. And wouldn't you know the scariest thing looking back was just the fact I was delivering at 33 weeks and didn't know what to expect from him. A nurse held my hand and breathed and talked me through every contraction, she kept me awake when I started to pass out, ya it was painful but that was the least of my worries at that point. The adrenaline rush when it was over can't be compared to anything. I remember even holding my breath until I heard DS cry.

So, there's a part of me that is ready to do med free again. There's a part of me that is looking for a more relaxed/less urgent experience and ready to just get the epi. It will definitely be a game time decision. But I did it without any classes or a midwife/doula, and I'm still happy with the decisions I made during his pregnancy not to do them.

This story is exactly why I think all women should study natural birthing and pain management techniques, regardless of their birth plan intentions. And this is coming from someone who didn't take a single class the first time because, yeah, I wanted an epidural.   Since then I've just had so many friends go through this same, fast thing.  I feel lucky that things when as I planned with DS but realize, now, how easily it could have been different.

[tiffbot]

Yes, I was lucky and had a great bedside nurse considering I didn't know what I was doing. She was my hero that day lol.

ETA- and I was the hero to all the nurses, aside from one, had never delivered in a recovery room before so they were frantically setting it up when they decided to put me there and frantically looking for a doctor, they all gave me a pat on the back for a new experience after haha.

[effthisnoise]

Just wanted to add--I was my mom's second delivery. She woke up in labor around midnight, went to the hospital and got an epidural, and I was born at about 5:14am. I was also 13 days late (though I think the dates were slightly off because I was 8lbs9oz, not huge). I don't know how much the timing plays into it, but I'm happy to know that an epidural doesn't always delay labor.

[carolyngrace]

Mar 23, 2015 12:22:19 GMT -5 @pcrunk said:

Every single med free birth story I hear is always relatively quick. Granted, I've really only heard maybe 8. I'm super curious to know if it actually that quick due to lack of intervention or if just so happens that all that I've had share fall into the "lucky" ones. I guess that's part of the reason why I'm freaking the fuck about wanting to do this but being in labor FORRRREVVVVVVERRRR. My mom was in labor with me for 18 hours. I was 10 days late, she was induced, had an edidural, a full blown episiotomy, and the worst recovery. She claims it was worse than her c/s recovery with my sister. My sister was 7 days late. My mom was induced, had the epi, my sister ended up in distress due to her cord being wrapped around her neck twice, then her shoulder, then her neck again. So I guess, regardless of the fact that she had all that intervention, I feel like I'm destined for a horrendous labor.

Like I mentioned before, I know at least 2 people personally who had very long labors w/o meds. But as a whole I do believe research has shown pain meds can prolong labor so your chances of a "fast" labor is better. My sisters were 7 and 5 hours and I'm hoping mine are longer than that! But not too long

Mar 23, 2015 12:05:42 GMT -5 noeliav said:

Here's the story of DD's birth:
38w- I leave work for my appointment (Thanksgiving weekend) and my boss says "Have a nice break! But don't have that baby yet."
MW checks my belly and says "Oh do you feel that?" Nope. "It's a contraction. Don't worry, you will soon." She listens to DD's heartbeat on the doppler and says, "And do you hear how her heartbeat has slowed a bit? She's ready to be born." Me, thinking "Um, no. Not yet. Give me a couple more weeks, pleaseandthankyou."
Thanksgiving Day (38w1d)- I'm having contractions all day long, but don't notice them. A few weeks later, I'm looking over pictures from that day and there are a few where I'm very concentrated on my belly. Huh.
38w2d- I wake up early with a sense that Things Must Be Done NOW. I run around getting copies of our house key for my sister and our friends. I go to Target and buy holiday decor, plus ingredients for freezer meals and breakfast breads. I call my sister and invite her over for a cooking/baking party-- she thinks I'm joking. I am not.
We spend the whole day in the kitchen, with me slumped over the kitchen counter with a heating pad on my back for my "annoying cramps." My sister and DH keep carefully suggesting that I, maybe, perhaps, start timing the cramps. You know, but only if I feel like it. (lol, apparently, I was a tad grouchy.) I refuse because why would I time "annoying cramps?!" My sister goes home about 8pm-ish and tells DH to call her when I'm ready to go to the hospital.
I take a bath around 9pm. I get out around 9:30pm because I ran out of hot water (so annoying). I try to go to bed but cannot because these annoying cramps are... well... annoying. I practice using the contraction timer because I'm not sleeping anyway, but it turns out I cannot focus on the annoying cramps and use the timer at the same time. I wander downstairs at about 10pm to hand DH the contraction timer and end up on my knees hugging the ottoman during the next "annoying cramp." I go to the bathroom and see lots of bloody show. Holy crap. DH runs upstairs to shower. I admit that, possibly, this is labor and go to finish packing our labor bag. My water breaks shortly thereafter and we get to the hospital around 11:00/11:30pm.
It is intense, the contractions. I'm vocalizing plenty during each one. The nurses (all 3 of them) each make multiple attempts at placing the IV in my hand (I'm GBS+) before giving up and putting it in my elbow crook. This sucks. They make me "read" (hahahaha) and "sign" (hahahahahaheffingha) paperwork, even though I've preregistered. A nurse tells me to "be quieter." I tell her to "shut up" and DH to "get her out of here." Finally we're all settled in with a nice (read: supportive) two-nurse team, and I hunker down to work through each contraction. 3:00am and I start to grunt right as one of my nurses is monitoring the fetus. "Are you pushing?" "I'm not doing anything! My body is!" "If you feel that again, you call us right away." The next contraction, my body is definitely bearing down so I tell DH to get the nurse right away. The nurse works with me through some pushing contractions, then the OB arrived and we pushed out DD. She was born at 4:07am. Perfect.

Great story thanks for sharing!

[maddib]

I had a med free birth with my daughter. It was horrible!! Mainly because the my induced me really fast and my white blood cell counts were too low for an epidural. The doctor apologized profusely saying they don't induce without the epidural because the contractions are like twenty times harder and worse!!! And it sucked because having a small cold can bring your white blood cell counts down. It was ridiculous!! I dilated from a 4 to a 10 in less then an hour. Her head was coming out and the nurse didn't believe me!! Until she saw it that it. This time if they have to induce me I will be asking them about my blood count before they do so!! I really hope they don't have to this time. I will probably get the epidural anyway though. Cause I have done the med free thing twice and I want an easy labor like all the other women that told me about their magical unicorn deliveries! Lol. Probably won't happen though!

[Deleted]

Mar 23, 2015 14:34:04 GMT -5 carolyngrace said:

Mar 23, 2015 12:22:19 GMT -5 @pcrunk said:

Every single med free birth story I hear is always relatively quick. Granted, I've really only heard maybe 8. I'm super curious to know if it actually that quick due to lack of intervention or if just so happens that all that I've had share fall into the "lucky" ones. I guess that's part of the reason why I'm freaking the fuck about wanting to do this but being in labor FORRRREVVVVVVERRRR. My mom was in labor with me for 18 hours. I was 10 days late, she was induced, had an edidural, a full blown episiotomy, and the worst recovery. She claims it was worse than her c/s recovery with my sister. My sister was 7 days late. My mom was induced, had the epi, my sister ended up in distress due to her cord being wrapped around her neck twice, then her shoulder, then her neck again. So I guess, regardless of the fact that she had all that intervention, I feel like I'm destined for a horrendous labor.

Like I mentioned before, I know at least 2 people personally who had very long labors w/o meds. But as a whole I do believe research has shown pain meds can prolong labor so your chances of a "fast" labor is better. My sisters were 7 and 5 hours and I'm hoping mine are longer than that! But not too long

My induced and completely medicated induction, at 38w3d, for DS was 13 hours total, 11 hours if you count from when the OB broke my water, since the Pitocin was doing nothing at all for me before that.   So, if medication slows things down, I hope this means a natural, unmedicated with this one will be 8 hours or less, maybe faster since I'll wait until baby is ready on his own.  So long as it's not so fast we don't get to the hospital. 

[ThePalindromicOne]

Oh man.... cue anxiety attack re: all this!

I've got lots to think about, but I've already told hubs that if I have some pre-conceived "plan" going in, and it doesn't go that way and I want to change... than to let me do whatever I want... none of this "But you said you didn't want XYZ..."

Side note: I've already done this, I told J long time ago "When I finally get pregnant remind me that I DO NOT want to take maternity pictures" Whelp, I'm working on scheduling those now... meh!

[noeliav]

Mar 23, 2015 16:01:52 GMT -5 pbubblegum said:

Mar 23, 2015 12:05:42 GMT -5 noeliav said:

Here's the story of DD's birth:
*snip*

"Get her out of here!" I love that! 

It's true! And I was dead serious. I'm usually a very nice person, and I don't remember the last time I've told someone to "shut up" (other than that, lol!), but she was not going to be helpful and so she needed to go. 

[Deleted]

Mar 23, 2015 16:40:33 GMT -5 noeliav said:

Mar 23, 2015 16:01:52 GMT -5 pbubblegum said:

"Get her out of here!" I love that! 

It's true! And I was dead serious. I'm usually a very nice person, and I don't remember the last time I've told someone to "shut up" (other than that, lol!), but she was not going to be helpful and so she needed to go. 

Seriously, what are they going to do if a birthing woman is being "too loud?"  Call security and have her thrown out?   Hold her down and force her to be medicated?   I think STFU is the perfectly appropriate response to that.

[ladysif]

Mar 23, 2015 12:03:37 GMT -5 noeliav said:

I'll go grab my pain-med-free birth story from an older post, but quickly...
If you want to go pain-med free, you can do it. You can! And, there is nothing to be afraid of. The pain, the intensity, it's challenging, yes. But, there are breaks in between the contractions. There is time to recover and rest. And, it is all worth it. I felt *amazing* postpartum.

Anything after that is gravy.

...not always!

I was induced and my labor was 4 p.m. - 7:30 a.m. I expected there to be a break between contractions throughout laboring except during transition, even if it was only 15 or 30 seconds, but with my labor that was definitely not the case. I took lamaze and made a valiant effort to go med-free, but when the contractions were literally on top of each other for hours with no breaks in between and I finally had them check and it wasn't transition (thinking if this was transition I could get through the rest of it since it lasts for a finite time, but the nurse said it could continue for several hours that way... this was around 4 a.m.), I opted for IV meds to take the edge off. It did slow them down so I did have a 30 second - 1 minute break again between them. 

Not at all to be discouraging to those who want to go the natural route. I just thought it important to mention because it is possible you won't get breaks. I will try it again this time myself (and there's definite truth to the fact that it is easier for STMs because typically labor is shorter), and absolutely applaud those who can do it, but I do think a key element of whether you succeed is just how your labor ends up going! 

[mathistm]

I should probably not even ask or should be worried about other things-but here we go. My biggest fear is "the tearing". My ob rarely does episiotomies and only if baby is stressed and they need to move along labor. If you go med free do they numb you to repair that? Do you even care? Any med free births experience this? Is it awful when it happens or do you not really know?

[wegrowsheep]

Mar 23, 2015 18:43:36 GMT -5 mathistm said:

I should probably not even ask or should be worried about other things-but here we go. My biggest fear is "the tearing". My ob rarely does episiotomies and only if baby is stressed and they need to move along labor. If you go med free do they numb you to repair that? Do you even care? Any med free births experience this? Is it awful when it happens or do you not really know?

2 med free births.

First one, I needed to have a bigger opening, and I asked for the episiotomy. This all happened as she was crowning. They numbed me before they snipped, and again before they stitched. I don't remember it hurting.

Round 2 happened a hell of a lot faster. He crowned on push #1. I tore a little, and they had to numb me twice. I remember that. It isn't called the ring of fire for nothing!

If they stick a needle in you down there, and it hurts, tell them you need more local. They won't say no!

[amber311]

I am also planning med free. But of course I will do anything to keep the baby safe. I will not however budge on an epidural. I would have such severe anxiety that they might as well take me in for a c-section knocked out. I'm not against IV meds should the labor take long and I need rest but the goal is to not use any. We have our birthing class with a doula for lamaze starting in 3 weeks. I'm hoping to learning techniques to help. Our hospital and OB are so supportive of the no med route. All private rooms with tubs, birthing bars, balls , etc. I'm terrified of ripping. I'm terrified of not being strong enough. But I keep telling myself that my body was made to do this. Women have been birthing babies forever. And I have to say this is the first time I am glad that my edd is at the end of the month so I can read all of your birth stories for inspiration

[carolyngrace]

Mar 23, 2015 18:43:36 GMT -5 mathistm said:

I should probably not even ask or should be worried about other things-but here we go. My biggest fear is "the tearing". My ob rarely does episiotomies and only if baby is stressed and they need to move along labor. If you go med free do they numb you to repair that? Do you even care? Any med free births experience this? Is it awful when it happens or do you not really know?

My biggest fear was always the stretching/pain/tearing of my actual vaginal opening. But my sister told me that (at least for her) the REAL pain was inside her stomach and hips as her body opened for the baby. She hardly noticed the vaginal pain (including some small tearing), though she did feel the "ring of fire" as baby crowned. 

For some reason that made me feel way better. Maybe because I can't imagine the type of pain she described. So it's just like "yeah I'll deal with that thing I can't imagine when it gets here!"

[tiffbot]

Mar 23, 2015 18:43:36 GMT -5 mathistm said:

I should probably not even ask or should be worried about other things-but here we go. My biggest fear is "the tearing". My ob rarely does episiotomies and only if baby is stressed and they need to move along labor. If you go med free do they numb you to repair that? Do you even care? Any med free births experience this? Is it awful when it happens or do you not really know?

I had third degree tearing partially from them using foreceps on the last push and I honestly don't remember feeling it, I don't know if she numbed it when she stitched it. I remember exactly when she stitched, we had a conversation and I couldn't stop laughing on my huge adrenaline high. She said no one has ever laughed through that before for her lol. I was just so relieved DS was ok.

[carolyngrace]

May 2015 has a really good med free check in Monday going on right now. For those of you who don't look too much :-) gives me some good thoughts about what we can talk about in the coming weeks.

[carolyngrace]

I would! Even if it's not every week, or we just had a question or two. I think as we get closer it will get more helpful.