weaning advice requested
Jan 22, 2015 2:28:28 GMT -5
Post by Gftf7 on Jan 22, 2015 2:28:28 GMT -5
So, I'm starting to think about weaning. Specifically night weaning. LO still wakes often during the night to nurse.
LO is mostly day-weaned. Especially if we're on the go all day and I keep the snacks and meals coming, requests to nurse never come up anymore. Even at home, as long as I stay ahead of the hunger, I rarely get requests to nurse (assuming no sickness). So "don't offer, don't refuse" worked well for that.
One BIG issue that we have, is that LO nurses to sleep and always has. Soooo......... I'm pretty sure I'm screwed, in a very big way, and I totally did it to myself. Any advice on how to break that?
I think I need to teach LO how to self-soothe, but I'm not really sure how to do that. At least I would logically feel better about that, instead of just locking LO in a room to cry-it-out, with no way to address the issue. I would prefer not to CIO, because I'm a wimp, but I'm not 100% against it.
A bit of history:
* Since I've been home with LO the entire time, we did some pumped bottles of breastmilk back in the day, but I mostly nursed LO.
* LO did sometimes use a pacifier at first, but was never attached to it, and was maybe done with it before 1 year old? I've had one family member suggest to bring those back out, which I will, once I find the box they got packed in.
* Way back when, LO started out sleeping in a crib, then transitioned to co-sleeping as it was easier to nurse and get some sleep that way. Then LO got mobile and my H was afraid he would roll over on LO, so we took the crib mattress out of the crib and put it on the floor of our bedroom and LO has been sleeping there ever since. When LO wakes in the middle of the night, I just move down to the crib mattress on the floor when needed and then go back to the big bed when LO is back asleep.
One idea for weaning is for my H to take LO to another bedroom. We have a spare bedroom upstairs, where the toys my H had when he was little are at. My H often takes LO up there to play. LO loves it up there (I call it the "man attic", ha!) We would have the crib mattress on the floor and my H would wait for LO to tire out and basically pass out for the night, since I wouldn't be there to nurse LO to sleep. It might work. But, what if LO wakes in the middle of the night? I don't know if playing until passing out would work so well then.
We thought this change in sleep location might help LO adjust to a new way of falling asleep (instead of me moving to the guest bedroom for 2 weeks, leaving my H and LO in our bedroom).
We have a little pillow that LO often uses. LO gets tucked in with small blankies, but is not attached to any certain one, so I can rotate them through the laundry with no meltdowns. Maybe a small stuffed animal would work as a comfort item, instead of me? Maybe a t-shirt that I've worn for a day, that would smell like me, might be comforting? Or maybe that reminder of me might get LO even more worked up? As mentioned above, I'll get the pacifiers out again too, to see if they help.
I read somewhere that it is best to start a change like this at bedtime, since naps are optional. Meaning that if there is a strict time for naps from 1pm to 3pm, and the child does not nap during those hours, then no nap happens that day. Whereas bedtime might get pushed back, but is not optional. Meaning that the child physically can not stay awake all night.
We are hoping that if my H does an "intervention" for 2 weeks, that then we could go back to our regular sleeping arrangements. But, how bad would it be to try for a night or two, and then stop? I think I've read somewhere that "false starts" are not good.
Ugh, I'm such a wimpy Mom. And I'd like to have all the answers before we start this process and know how it's all going to play out, which I know is not possible.
Ideally, I'd like LO to just lose interest in nursing, so I don't have to be the "bad guy", but I don't see that happening. I already feel bad that I've never taught LO any other coping mechanisms.
My H has time to help with this now. Come March and April, his work gets busy, so it will just be me and LO, so now is a good time as far as that is concerned.
Any advice and encouragement is greatly appreciated.
Sorry for the novel. Can you tell that I'm a bit worked up about all this too?
LO is mostly day-weaned. Especially if we're on the go all day and I keep the snacks and meals coming, requests to nurse never come up anymore. Even at home, as long as I stay ahead of the hunger, I rarely get requests to nurse (assuming no sickness). So "don't offer, don't refuse" worked well for that.
One BIG issue that we have, is that LO nurses to sleep and always has. Soooo......... I'm pretty sure I'm screwed, in a very big way, and I totally did it to myself. Any advice on how to break that?
I think I need to teach LO how to self-soothe, but I'm not really sure how to do that. At least I would logically feel better about that, instead of just locking LO in a room to cry-it-out, with no way to address the issue. I would prefer not to CIO, because I'm a wimp, but I'm not 100% against it.
A bit of history:
* Since I've been home with LO the entire time, we did some pumped bottles of breastmilk back in the day, but I mostly nursed LO.
* LO did sometimes use a pacifier at first, but was never attached to it, and was maybe done with it before 1 year old? I've had one family member suggest to bring those back out, which I will, once I find the box they got packed in.
* Way back when, LO started out sleeping in a crib, then transitioned to co-sleeping as it was easier to nurse and get some sleep that way. Then LO got mobile and my H was afraid he would roll over on LO, so we took the crib mattress out of the crib and put it on the floor of our bedroom and LO has been sleeping there ever since. When LO wakes in the middle of the night, I just move down to the crib mattress on the floor when needed and then go back to the big bed when LO is back asleep.
One idea for weaning is for my H to take LO to another bedroom. We have a spare bedroom upstairs, where the toys my H had when he was little are at. My H often takes LO up there to play. LO loves it up there (I call it the "man attic", ha!) We would have the crib mattress on the floor and my H would wait for LO to tire out and basically pass out for the night, since I wouldn't be there to nurse LO to sleep. It might work. But, what if LO wakes in the middle of the night? I don't know if playing until passing out would work so well then.
We thought this change in sleep location might help LO adjust to a new way of falling asleep (instead of me moving to the guest bedroom for 2 weeks, leaving my H and LO in our bedroom).
We have a little pillow that LO often uses. LO gets tucked in with small blankies, but is not attached to any certain one, so I can rotate them through the laundry with no meltdowns. Maybe a small stuffed animal would work as a comfort item, instead of me? Maybe a t-shirt that I've worn for a day, that would smell like me, might be comforting? Or maybe that reminder of me might get LO even more worked up? As mentioned above, I'll get the pacifiers out again too, to see if they help.
I read somewhere that it is best to start a change like this at bedtime, since naps are optional. Meaning that if there is a strict time for naps from 1pm to 3pm, and the child does not nap during those hours, then no nap happens that day. Whereas bedtime might get pushed back, but is not optional. Meaning that the child physically can not stay awake all night.
We are hoping that if my H does an "intervention" for 2 weeks, that then we could go back to our regular sleeping arrangements. But, how bad would it be to try for a night or two, and then stop? I think I've read somewhere that "false starts" are not good.
Ugh, I'm such a wimpy Mom. And I'd like to have all the answers before we start this process and know how it's all going to play out, which I know is not possible.
Ideally, I'd like LO to just lose interest in nursing, so I don't have to be the "bad guy", but I don't see that happening. I already feel bad that I've never taught LO any other coping mechanisms.
My H has time to help with this now. Come March and April, his work gets busy, so it will just be me and LO, so now is a good time as far as that is concerned.
Any advice and encouragement is greatly appreciated.
Sorry for the novel. Can you tell that I'm a bit worked up about all this too?