Article: Nudity in front of your kids

[ksyknelvr73]

Saw this article and I had to wonder, what do you guys think? What is the "magic age"? I have a son who will be 4 next month and DH and I both are still comfortable not covering up immediately around him. He asks questions and I explain things to him, and I don't parade around naked for extended periods of time, but if he comes in the bathroom when I am getting out of the shower, I don't freak out.

www.yahoo.com/parenting/should-your-kids-see-you-naked-107600140897.html

[Deleted]

My parents walked around naked well into grade school and I'm pretty sure I interrupted my mom's baths indefinitely.

This didn't bother me, it didn't make my sister or I walk around naked, we didn't have any questions about body parts, it was basically a non-issue and they stopped when their bedroom was no longer on opposite sides of the house from the, then, 1 bathroom.

Both my husband and I are pretty modest about self nudity and our bathroom is only attached to the master bedroom so it's not as likely to come up but I won't care if my kid sees me naked as I know it's not going to affect them at all unless I wait til like.. 10 years from now and then suddenly start streaking daily.

[bazingaa]

If your kid could potentially remember as an adult, I think it should stop. I don't think any grow adult should have memories of their parents naked. So.... That would probably mean around 4 or 5.

[Deleted]

I remember what my parents looked like and pretty much indefinitely my mother's "pajamas" were men's tank top undershirts and her underwear. Again, didn't affect me at all.. I really didn't care then, don't care now, and of course they also didn't do any of this stuff when friends were over.

[ksyknelvr73]

My parents weren't overly concerned with being naked in front of us. They didn't make it a point to be naked in front of us by any means, but if I happened to walk in their room and they were changing clothes or whatever, there was no embarrassment or weirdness. I do feel like my dad made a big deal about not just coming in their room once I got to a certain age (like, if the door is closed, it means we're changing or showering, etc so don't come in here without knocking), but my mom has always been open about it. It didn't scar me for life.

A lot of times DS1 and DH take a shower together, mostly for convenience and time savings. I know at some point that will need to stop, but I'm not there yet and neither is DH.

[comicSans]

Jan 22, 2015 12:01:56 GMT -5 bazingaa said:

If your kid could potentially remember as an adult, I think it should stop. I don't think any grow adult should have memories of their parents naked. So.... That would probably mean around 4 or 5.

If your kid could potentially say something about it at school that would get CPS called.

[Deleted]

Jan 22, 2015 12:28:17 GMT -5 comicSans said:

Jan 22, 2015 12:01:56 GMT -5 bazingaa said:

If your kid could potentially remember as an adult, I think it should stop. I don't think any grow adult should have memories of their parents naked. So.... That would probably mean around 4 or 5.

If your kid could potentially say something about it at school that would get CPS called.

I feel like that is another issue entirely. I never felt the need to talk about it because it wasn't a big deal, it was just people getting ready in the morning. 

[athn64]

I think it's a personal preference thing. At what point do you feel uncomfortable being naked around your child. If you feel it's weird, they'll pick up on that too.

[SpinsOffResonance]

Jan 22, 2015 12:28:17 GMT -5 comicSans said:

Jan 22, 2015 12:01:56 GMT -5 bazingaa said:

If your kid could potentially remember as an adult, I think it should stop. I don't think any grow adult should have memories of their parents naked. So.... That would probably mean around 4 or 5.

If your kid could potentially say something about it at school that would get CPS called.

is that for real?

[scout251]

DH already gets weird about not having pants on around DD even when he's got boxer briefs on. So as far as he's concerned it's already too late. I'm personally not comfortable with my body and being naked so I would imagine I would cover up around my kid(s) sooner rather than later but certainly no time soon.

[ho11yday]

There was a point in my childhood where both my brother and I asked that my dad start wearing clothes. He listened. I don't want it to get that far where my kids have to ask, but I don't have a good range. I think in the next couple of years (4-6 yo). But it's going to be a problem is that both dh and I sleep nude. I'm going to have to start wearing pajamas.

[SpinsOffResonance]

Regarding the premise of the article, I find it very disturbing when moms bring their 6-10yo boys in the women's locker room. These kids should not be seeing so many strangers' boobies and it makes me uncomfortable to change.
In front of my own kids, I don't know though. Now I bathe with the kids because it's easier (DD1 is 2). And they see me naked when I'm getting in/out of the shower and getting dressed. I Don't walk around naked otherwise. DH is always in his underwear when at home. I've been telling him he's gonna have to start wearing clothes soon. But I don't see it as a nudity issue, it's a manner issue.. As in we don't sit around the house naked all day because of proper etiquette. I have no qualms if the girls see him naked so far. Not sure at what age that will change.
The other day DD was sitting on the couch between DH's legs, she points straight at his penis which wasn't very well covered by his boxers an asks "what's that?", so she is noticing. And when I forget to put my boobs away after feeding DD2, she walks up to me grabs my shirt, covers my boob and goes "clean up, clean up" .
Is it only my DH or do all men strip to their underwear as soon as they walk through the door and hang out like that all evening?

[lissiehoya]

Jan 22, 2015 13:33:03 GMT -5 SpinsOffResonance said:

Regarding the premise of the article, I find it very disturbing when moms bring their 6-10yo boys in the women's locker room. These kids should not be seeing so many strangers' boobies and it makes me uncomfortable to change.
In front of my own kids, I don't know though. Now I bathe with the kids because it's easier (DD1 is 2). And they see me naked when I'm getting in/out of the shower and getting dressed. I Don't walk around naked otherwise. DH is always in his underwear when at home. I've been telling him he's gonna have to start wearing clothes soon. But I don't see it as a nudity issue, it's a manner issue.. As in we don't sit around the house naked all day because of proper etiquette. I have no qualms if the girls see him naked so far. Not sure at what age that will change.
The other day DD was sitting on the couch between DH's legs, she points straight at his penis which wasn't very well covered by his boxers an asks "what's that?", so she is noticing. And when I forget to put my boobs away after feeding DD2, she walks up to me grabs my shirt, covers my boob and goes "clean up, clean up" .
Is it only my DH or do all men strip to their underwear as soon as they walk through the door and hang out like that all evening?

Not only your DH. I was trying to explain to DH one time over the summer that not snapping DS's onesie was like him not wearing pants... then I realized that I was telling DH this as he was lounging around in his boxers.

[kittyriot]

Jan 22, 2015 13:33:03 GMT -5 SpinsOffResonance said:

Regarding the premise of the article, I find it very disturbing when moms bring their 6-10yo boys in the women's locker room. These kids should not be seeing so many strangers' boobies and it makes me uncomfortable to change.
In front of my own kids, I don't know though. Now I bathe with the kids because it's easier (DD1 is 2). And they see me naked when I'm getting in/out of the shower and getting dressed. I Don't walk around naked otherwise. DH is always in his underwear when at home. I've been telling him he's gonna have to start wearing clothes soon. But I don't see it as a nudity issue, it's a manner issue.. As in we don't sit around the house naked all day because of proper etiquette. I have no qualms if the girls see him naked so far. Not sure at what age that will change.
The other day DD was sitting on the couch between DH's legs, she points straight at his penis which wasn't very well covered by his boxers an asks "what's that?", so she is noticing. And when I forget to put my boobs away after feeding DD2, she walks up to me grabs my shirt, covers my boob and goes "clean up, clean up" .
Is it only my DH or do all men strip to their underwear as soon as they walk through the door and hang out like that all evening?

Unless we have something going on, I get home and I change into "comfies" (either pj's or yoga pants). TH feels this is a bad practice and tries to wait until later in the evening to put his "comfies" on. So generally he gets home, changes into jeans and a tshirt, then eventually ends up in pj pants and tshirt.

So the long winded answer to your questions, is no. my proper husbands think more along the lines that you do and thinks proper ettiquette is to not hang out in your comfies all evening. I on the other hand, unless there is a reason to be properly clothed, I am not!

[becole]

I am not comfortable with nudity but I don't want my child to be insecure about their body or pick up on my weirdness. Like I breastfeed but would feel weird if 8 month old DD was chilling while I changed clothes. Idk.

And yes with the men in their boxers. I've already told him that needs to stop with kids. I don't want two boys hanging out in just their boxers,

[kendy20]

Jan 22, 2015 12:56:35 GMT -5 scout251 said:

DH already gets weird about not having pants on around DD even when he's got boxer briefs on. So as far as he's concerned it's already too late. I'm personally not comfortable with my body and being naked so I would imagine I would cover up around my kid(s) sooner rather than later but certainly no time soon.

DH is the same as yours. He's very uncomfortable in his boxers around DD and will put on some pajama pants before he goes to get her in the morning. I don't really care about her seeing me sine she sees my boobs all days anyways (ebf). 

[ho11yday]

There's an episode on modern family where both Luke and Phil answer the door in their under wear. I picture both dh and ds1 doing that. Sadly.

[buster]

I haven't finished reading, but I'm lol-ing at the 5 year old talking about boobies. DD uses "boob" as a verb (as in "he needs you to boob him, mama" and DS seems to call me boob instead of mama. It seems like a rather harmless thing for a kid to talk about. But I don't think boobs=nudity at all either.

[SpinsOffResonance]

Jan 22, 2015 15:04:35 GMT -5 @kitchen said:

Jan 22, 2015 12:28:17 GMT -5 comicSans said:

If your kid could potentially say something about it at school that would get CPS called.

Can you elaborate on this?

This cannot be true... Paging the pros haykay13, chennel86

[zolten]

I remember walking in on my mom taking baths as a child but I certainly never dwelt on what she looked like. She stopped taking baths when I was 10, so it had to have been before that.

Mh isn't comfy without pants on around DD. Boxers aren't enough for him. Im ok with her seeing me naked for a few years. We do joint baths once a week now but I plan to stop that before she's 2.

[haykay13]

Jan 22, 2015 15:39:29 GMT -5 SpinsOffResonance said:

Jan 22, 2015 15:04:35 GMT -5 @kitchen said:

Can you elaborate on this?

This cannot be true... Paging the pros haykay13, chennel86

I think a teacher or someone could possibly call in a report if a child made a comment that sounded weird to them or if they are of the thought that your child should never see you nude.
Teachers in FL are mandated reporters so they are supposed to report anything that could be child abuse.
I'm only familiar with Florida's laws and I'm pretty sure there is nothing written about your child seeing you nude in an innocent way.
I worked a case where a 4 yr old daughter showered with her mom and none of the CPS workers involved thought that was a concern.

[jerssey]

I still am naked getting in and out if the shower with my almost 3yr DD and my lil May guy. DD is just starting to ask about private parts so I explain it to her. I will likely stop being naked around her near 4 yr and DS probably the same age. I still see my Mom naked at times and I don't care. Doesn't bug me at all really. But to each their own I guess. I have 3 sisters and only one bathroom growing up so we all saw each other and peed and pooped with others in the bathroom most times and that didn't really bug me either. Guess it is what you are comfortable with.

[kat8805]

Nudity happens in my house.

[sexypumpkin]

I'm going to add this cultural tidbit. In Germany, especially east Germany, it is common for people hangout together naked. So at the park or beach, public places with friends or family- everyone. I remember walking through a park in Munich, seeing all the naked Germans eating, sunbathing, playing volleyball, etc. no worries about sexuality etc.

I remember seeing my parents naked at various ages. It certainly didn't have any effect on me. I didn't think much of it honestly. Never in a sexual context.

Nudity does not equal sex. It's just a body & not a big deal. I certainly don't think nudity would be something to report to DCFS. Otherwise, all nudists would lose their children.

[sexypumpkin]

Nudity happens in my house too

[katzalia]

If I was worried about DD seeing me naked now, I would hardly ever get a shower. I do now get to pee alone for the most part (thankfully) but showering or changing clothes? I'm not going to fuss about that for a few years.

DH was really freaked out about nudity around DD initially, but he has relaxed a bit. He stays covered up but has will go check on her in his boxers rather than let her get more worked up while he puts on pants.

[haykay13]

I am a cold person so I stay pretty covered up lol

I think I will probably stop changing in front of DS when he is getting old enough to tell people stories. I don't want him to tell anyone that mommy has a mole on her butt or something,

[comicSans]

Oh hi. I was half kidding about the CPS comment, but we do live in different times now where people are more alert to potential abuse than when we were kids. Not saying nudity is abuse, but kids say crazy things sometimes, and if it's misinterpreted by an adult, it could be reported.

I was thinking specifically of PA where they just changed their mandatory reporting laws in response the Jerry Sandusky cases. Mandatory reporters now include all staff at schools and medical facilities, and volunteers who regularly see the children, like coaches or church nursery volunteers. They are no longer expected to report up if they suspect abuse, but directly call the hotline. If abuse is later discovered, and there's reason to believe a mandatory reporter had suspected and not reported, they can be charged as a perpetrator. Could help a lot of kids, but could also just lead to more reporting.

With all that in mind, I can imagine a scenario where a kid who likes to ramble on and tell stores that are 1/4 based in reality says something like, daddy likes to play naked. Then her soccer coach, who kinda thinks dad's creepy anyway and finds nudity inappropriate, goes ahead and reports it. And if you have a kid that's saying crazy stuff all the time you might be more careful about what kind of ammo you're supplying, even though it's totally innocent.

So that's all, just a quick imagined scenario, summed up in fleeting comment.

[jennyinheaven]

Maybe I'm the crazy one here but I still see my mom naked, I mean not on a regular basis since we don't live together anymore but if we are out shopping together we would share a dressing room or if she was still getting ready when I came over for something I would think nothing of coming into her room to chat while she finished getting dressed. That being said we have a daughter and I plan on being the same with her, DH on the other hand should cover up around her after a certain age, I'm thinking 3ish. I have no memories of my dad hanging out naked and one very vivid embarrassing one when I accidentally walked in on him after a shower as a pre teen:(

[lissiehoya]

I couldn't not change in front of DS right now because he tends to cry if he can't see me. So it's either PJs all day or nudity in front of DS. I imagine I'll change when he gets less clingy.