That's just your unpopular opinion

[dashook]

Jun 4, 2015 11:06:49 GMT -5 starbuck27 said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:06:17 GMT -5 requiressnacks said:

I like his music and I love the "lifestyle" he portrays but Jimmy Buffett is getting OLDDDDDDDDDDDDD. I would have been more into it if he were younger and actually living the life. But go head parrothead!

You don't know his lyfe.

This phrase never fails to make me laugh.

[summerdonna]

Jun 4, 2015 11:08:42 GMT -5 mazzola23 said:

Nsync is better than BSB

Loft house cookies are delicious.

I make cookies and cake batter multiple times every week and don't mind that raw egg. I live on the edge.

Hate when people ask DH "does your wife let you..."

UO: untoasted bagels are gross. Bagels should be toasted..

Wrong. Panera cinnamon crunch bagels are delicious untoasted.

[ironbaby]

Jun 4, 2015 10:49:53 GMT -5 akraus2015 said:

Jun 4, 2015 10:47:32 GMT -5 W said:

This wasn't posted because of you, I was just thinking about things :-)

It's interesting to see (through posts and interactions on TCF) how different people structure their family dynamics.  It has kind of made me realize that there is no right way, as long as you and your SO are both happy with how things are going.  It's also been very eye-opening to see how my own thoughts, words, actions, etc., seem to others, and how they can affect other people.  My H and I would never ask the "Do you mind if I..." question, but my parents literally will not do ANYTHING without "asking" the other first.

I too enjoy the different family dynamics. I tend to be a quietly judgmental person, and being here opens my eyes to other viewpoints.

I do ask my husband for permission on certain things. My best friend is coming to visit for the weekend, so I cleared it with him. By all means, if he had said no, she wouldn't be coming. I ask him out of respect. By that same token, never has he told me I wasn't allowed to do something; the respect is shared. So while the gist of the conversation is the same as many of you reference, we do use some terminology that implies permission, and that works for us.

That being said, I would never tell someone that my husband said I wasn't allowed to do something. If he says no, we'd both argue our case, and come to a decision that worked for both of us, and I'd present the conclusion as such.

[requiressnacks]

Speaking of bagels - has anyone ever seen how Breugger's cuts their bagels? They cut it in half and then in half again. IT IS SO WRONG.

Example.

[mustloveerica]

Jun 4, 2015 10:06:08 GMT -5 shadesofgold said:

UO: I don't intend to color my hair to cover my greys. I think a head of silver hair can look so classy and I've seen some really bad dye jobs that only call attention to the covering up of the grey hair. I have a couple of subtle streaks already and I fully plan to let it happen.

I recently dyed my hair back to closer to my natural color so I can grow it out. I'm tired of dying it. But now that's its growing out I can see I have tons of grays. It doesn't bother me much. I'd rather embrace it than spend the rest of my life hiding it.

[lgraceh]

Jun 4, 2015 10:32:42 GMT -5 W said:

I hate when people start a sentence/question with "does your husband let you..." Or "does your wife let you..."

That. Or asking where my H's "man card" is.

[LadyNymeria]

Jun 4, 2015 11:07:36 GMT -5 adorebel said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:04:24 GMT -5 LadyNymeria said:

I definitely let my now husband pay for dinner on our first date. He asked me to dinner, I think it's a nice gesture for him to have paid. However, after our show we went out for dessert and I paid for dessert/drinks/coffee. He has mentioned a few times that he very much appreciated that.

Like I said in the first post I made about this, "it probably puts me at the more extreme end of things," "it's a tricky area," "gender politics are complicated," and this position is "not for everyone." 
 

I definitely get that. I just thought it was interesting that our first date was basically a mix between your thoughts and what @pugsandwine had posted.

[blueteamcaboose]

Jumping in here.... Oatmeal raisin cookies are the best cookies. Especially frozen, dunked in milk

[Deleted]

Jun 4, 2015 11:10:03 GMT -5 mustloveerica said:

Jun 4, 2015 9:30:28 GMT -5 akraus2015 said:

I'll probably get flamed for this one, but I can take it. Gender roles/ gender stereotypes don't bother me at all. I am as girly as they come and don't get the slightest bit offended when I'm stereotyped for it. My nails are always done, the kitchen is my domain, and I do not do yard work of any kind. I don't mind playing the wifey role at all, and it doesn't bother me that my husband expects me to clean the house and do the laundry.

I mean I love cooking and I love cleaning because I'm a weirdo. But my husband does not EXPECT me to do those things. In fact lately he does most of the laundry. I also love working in the yard and he loves that I don't mind getting dirty (in more ways than 1). I mean gender stereotypes are fine and all in some cases but the way you worded this is completely wrong and i feel sad for you.

I'll go ahead and comment anyway despite my earlier comments. Gender stereotypes are never okay and they affect men and women. A true feminist fights for equality of both genders. To have gender stereotypes, in any case, means someone is expected to do something. I feel just as much women should not be judged for wanting a preconceived "manly" job so should a man be able to have a "girly" job. Women should not be expected to do dishes and laundry just as men should not be expected to mow or take out the trash. Women should not be thought as overly emotional just as men should not be thought less of if they cry. I work as MH stays home because he is going to go to school and my salary allows us to do this. He does 90% of all house work, inside and outside and I help out on the weekends. People judge us hard when I say MH stays at home and thinks he is a lazy bum. I fight every day to change those stereotypes so people don't think less of him.

[ironbaby]

Jun 4, 2015 11:18:27 GMT -5 @rutherily said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:10:03 GMT -5 mustloveerica said:

I mean I love cooking and I love cleaning because I'm a weirdo. But my husband does not EXPECT me to do those things. In fact lately he does most of the laundry. I also love working in the yard and he loves that I don't mind getting dirty (in more ways than 1). I mean gender stereotypes are fine and all in some cases but the way you worded this is completely wrong and i feel sad for you.

I'll go ahead and comment anyway despite my earlier comments. Gender stereotypes are never okay and they affect men and women. A true feminist fights for equality of both genders. To have gender stereotypes, in any case, means someone is expected to do something. I feel just as much women should not be judged for wanting a preconceived "manly" job so should a man be able to have a "girly" job. Women should not be expected to do dishes and laundry just as men should not be expected to mow or take out the trash. Women should not be thought as overly emotional just as men should not be thought less of if they cry. I work as MH stays home because he is going to go to school and my salary allows us to do this. He does 90% of all house work, inside and outside and I help out on the weekends. People judge us hard when I say MH stays at home and thinks he is a lazy bum. I fight every day to change those stereotypes so people don't think less of him.

I think Stay At Home Dads are sexy. (always exceptions, but still)

[mugster]

Jun 4, 2015 11:18:27 GMT -5 @rutherily said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:10:03 GMT -5 mustloveerica said:

I mean I love cooking and I love cleaning because I'm a weirdo. But my husband does not EXPECT me to do those things. In fact lately he does most of the laundry. I also love working in the yard and he loves that I don't mind getting dirty (in more ways than 1). I mean gender stereotypes are fine and all in some cases but the way you worded this is completely wrong and i feel sad for you.

I'll go ahead and comment anyway despite my earlier comments. Gender stereotypes are never okay and they affect men and women. A true feminist fights for equality of both genders. To have gender stereotypes, in any case, means someone is expected to do something. I feel just as much women should not be judged for wanting a preconceived "manly" job so should a man be able to have a "girly" job. Women should not be expected to do dishes and laundry just as men should not be expected to mow or take out the trash. Women should not be thought as overly emotional just as men should not be thought less of if they cry. I work as MH stays home because he is going to go to school and my salary allows us to do this. He does 90% of all house work, inside and outside and I help out on the weekends. People judge us hard when I

See there you go, not flame-worthy at all...

[shadesofgold]

Jun 4, 2015 11:13:50 GMT -5 mustloveerica said:

Jun 4, 2015 10:06:08 GMT -5 shadesofgold said:

UO: I don't intend to color my hair to cover my greys. I think a head of silver hair can look so classy and I've seen some really bad dye jobs that only call attention to the covering up of the grey hair. I have a couple of subtle streaks already and I fully plan to let it happen.

I recently dyed my hair back to closer to my natural color so I can grow it out. I'm tired of dying it. But now that's its growing out I can see I have tons of grays. It doesn't bother me much. I'd rather embrace it than spend the rest of my life hiding it.

Think of all the time and money you'll save over your lifetime! 

[Deleted]

Jun 4, 2015 11:20:03 GMT -5 ironbaby said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:18:27 GMT -5 @rutherily said:

I'll go ahead and comment anyway despite my earlier comments. Gender stereotypes are never okay and they affect men and women. A true feminist fights for equality of both genders. To have gender stereotypes, in any case, means someone is expected to do something. I feel just as much women should not be judged for wanting a preconceived "manly" job so should a man be able to have a "girly" job. Women should not be expected to do dishes and laundry just as men should not be expected to mow or take out the trash. Women should not be thought as overly emotional just as men should not be thought less of if they cry. I work as MH stays home because he is going to go to school and my salary allows us to do this. He does 90% of all house work, inside and outside and I help out on the weekends. People judge us hard when I say MH stays at home and thinks he is a lazy bum. I fight every day to change those stereotypes so people don't think less of him.

I think Stay At Home Dads are sexy. (always exceptions, but still)

Agreed. In fact I've told DH on more than one occasion that I'd be totally okay if that's what he wants to do. 

[shemarie82]

Jun 4, 2015 11:14:20 GMT -5 lgraceh said:

Jun 4, 2015 10:32:42 GMT -5 W said:

I hate when people start a sentence/question with "does your husband let you..." Or "does your wife let you..."

That. Or asking where my H's "man card" is.

Yesterday, at a work potluck, the griller sucked.  The guys were all joking that his man card should me taken away.  They all huffed when I said that I was sure that my WIFE could grill better than any of them, and asked if she needed to get one of those man cards.

[adorebel]

Jun 4, 2015 11:16:36 GMT -5 LadyNymeria said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:07:36 GMT -5 adorebel said:

Like I said in the first post I made about this, "it probably puts me at the more extreme end of things," "it's a tricky area," "gender politics are complicated," and this position is "not for everyone." 
 

I definitely get that. I just thought it was interesting that our first date was basically a mix between your thoughts and what @pugsandwine had posted.

Haha, I think I was being more literal in my post than I actually am IRL in order to make a point. I've definitely been on a first date where I bought the $5 comedy show tickets and he bought the $5 beers. The point is more that if I say I'm a feminist and I want gender equality in a relationship from the start, I should choose not to put it on the guy to pay for everything repeatedly in the first few interactions, which is still a fairly common practice in dating. 

[adorebel]

UPDATE TO MY TV DAD SIGGY: Deliciously cute Joel from Parenthood:

[Deleted]

Jun 4, 2015 11:23:58 GMT -5 shemarie82 said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:14:20 GMT -5 lgraceh said:

That. Or asking where my H's "man card" is.

Yesterday, at a work potluck, the griller sucked.  The guys were all joking that his man card should me taken away.  They all huffed when I said that I was sure that my WIFE could grill better than any of them, and asked if she needed to get one of those man cards.

We were ordering at a fast food restaurant and I went to pay and the guy behind the counter actually had the guts to ask MH why he was making me pay. He felt embarrassed enough to go ahead and pay even though he didn't have a lot of money at the time.

[Andrea]

Jun 4, 2015 11:23:58 GMT -5 shemarie82 said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:14:20 GMT -5 lgraceh said:

That. Or asking where my H's "man card" is.

Yesterday, at a work potluck, the griller sucked.  The guys were all joking that his man card should me taken away.  They all huffed when I said that I was sure that my WIFE could grill better than any of them, and asked if she needed to get one of those man cards.

I am the master griller in our household. MH is clueless when it comes to any of that stuff. I LOVE to cook and grilling is how I spend most of my summer. I am dying for a big green egg.

[zombiesquad]

Jun 4, 2015 11:08:42 GMT -5 mazzola23 said:

Nsync is better than BSB

Loft house cookies are delicious.

I make cookies and cake batter multiple times every week and don't mind that raw egg. I live on the edge.

Hate when people ask DH "does your wife let you..."

UO: untoasted bagels are gross. Bagels should be toasted..

Wut? No. I seriously just inhaled two untoasted blueberry bagels and they were glorious! GLORIOUS! But I do like my cream cheese.

[ironbaby]

Jun 4, 2015 11:34:01 GMT -5 @rutherily said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:23:58 GMT -5 shemarie82 said:

Yesterday, at a work potluck, the griller sucked.  The guys were all joking that his man card should me taken away.  They all huffed when I said that I was sure that my WIFE could grill better than any of them, and asked if she needed to get one of those man cards.

We were ordering at a fast food restaurant and I went to pay and the guy behind the counter actually had the balls to ask MH why he was making me pay. He felt embarrassed enough to go ahead and pay even though he didn't have a lot of money at the time.

WTF.

[ironbaby]

Jun 4, 2015 11:34:26 GMT -5 Andrea said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:23:58 GMT -5 shemarie82 said:

Yesterday, at a work potluck, the griller sucked.  The guys were all joking that his man card should me taken away.  They all huffed when I said that I was sure that my WIFE could grill better than any of them, and asked if she needed to get one of those man cards.

I am the master griller in our household. MH is clueless when it comes to any of that stuff. I LOVE to cook and grilling is how I spend most of my summer. I am dying for a big green egg.

I don't even know how to turn the grill on.

I mean, I could figure it out if I had to, but H grills. I have no desire.

[juliayadda]

hippo is correct that is how you cut a bagel.

I wish everyone could hear me say it BAG-el.

[Andrea]

Jun 4, 2015 11:35:29 GMT -5 ironbaby said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:34:26 GMT -5 Andrea said:

I am the master griller in our household. MH is clueless when it comes to any of that stuff. I LOVE to cook and grilling is how I spend most of my summer. I am dying for a big green egg.

I don't even know how to turn the grill on.

I mean, I could figure it out if I had to, but H grills. I have no desire.

MH tried to grilled steaks for me one summer, they were burnt so bad. We ended up going out for burgers, bless his heart.

[Andrea]

Jun 4, 2015 11:34:01 GMT -5 @rutherily said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:23:58 GMT -5 shemarie82 said:

Yesterday, at a work potluck, the griller sucked.  The guys were all joking that his man card should me taken away.  They all huffed when I said that I was sure that my WIFE could grill better than any of them, and asked if she needed to get one of those man cards.

We were ordering at a fast food restaurant and I went to pay and the guy behind the counter actually had the guts to ask MH why he was making me pay. He felt embarrassed enough to go ahead and pay even though he didn't have a lot of money at the time.

That's awful. People suck sometimes.

[shemarie82]

Jun 4, 2015 11:34:01 GMT -5 @rutherily said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:23:58 GMT -5 shemarie82 said:

Yesterday, at a work potluck, the griller sucked.  The guys were all joking that his man card should me taken away.  They all huffed when I said that I was sure that my WIFE could grill better than any of them, and asked if she needed to get one of those man cards.

We were ordering at a fast food restaurant and I went to pay and the guy behind the counter actually had the guts to ask MH why he was making me pay. He felt embarrassed enough to go ahead and pay even though he didn't have a lot of money at the time.

Regardless of gender in this situation, that is fucked up.  As a person that worked in customer service a long time, I never cared where the money was coming from.  Plus, you never know the dynamics of why people are together.  Wow!

[icaughtfire]

Jun 4, 2015 11:23:58 GMT -5 shemarie82 said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:14:20 GMT -5 lgraceh said:

That. Or asking where my H's "man card" is.

Yesterday, at a work potluck, the griller sucked.  The guys were all joking that his man card should me taken away.  They all huffed when I said that I was sure that my WIFE could grill better than any of them, and asked if she needed to get one of those man cards.

I don't know how to turn the grill on. And my husband cooks better than me too. And that man can make a toilet sparkle.

Fuck, I am a horrible wife.

[requiressnacks]

Jun 4, 2015 11:20:14 GMT -5 hippo said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:12:58 GMT -5 requiressnacks said:

Speaking of bagels - has anyone ever seen how Breugger's cuts their bagels? They cut it in half and then in half again. IT IS SO WRONG.

Example.

This is the normal way to cut a bagel. 

I strongly disagree.  Only one cut needs to be made.

[treble]

Jun 4, 2015 11:36:16 GMT -5 juliayadda said:

hippo is correct that is how you cut a bagel.

I wish everyone could hear me say it BAG-el.

My H says Behg-al. And Vehg-as.

[akraus2015]

Jun 4, 2015 11:34:26 GMT -5 Andrea said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:23:58 GMT -5 shemarie82 said:

Yesterday, at a work potluck, the griller sucked.  The guys were all joking that his man card should me taken away.  They all huffed when I said that I was sure that my WIFE could grill better than any of them, and asked if she needed to get one of those man cards.

I am the master griller in our household. MH is clueless when it comes to any of that stuff. I LOVE to cook and grilling is how I spend most of my summer. I am dying for a big green egg.

I kinda wish I knew how to grill. I love that MH does it most of them time, but it annoys me that I don't know how to grill. I got a griddle/grill combo for a bridal shower gift and I use that in the kitchen when MH isn't home and I want some grilled chicken, fish, etc.

[ironbaby]

Jun 4, 2015 11:40:10 GMT -5 icaughtfire said:

Jun 4, 2015 11:23:58 GMT -5 shemarie82 said:

Yesterday, at a work potluck, the griller sucked.  The guys were all joking that his man card should me taken away.  They all huffed when I said that I was sure that my WIFE could grill better than any of them, and asked if she needed to get one of those man cards.

I don't know how to turn the grill on. And my husband cooks better than me too. And that man can make a toilet sparkle.

Fuck, I am a horrible wife.

Right there with you. H cooks, cleans, takes care of the cars, cleans the litterbox...

I'm pretty?

Ha, JK. But seriously, H is a rockstar. I have my strength, but H out-wifes me.