Post by wannabmama on Jun 9, 2015 13:27:17 GMT -5
Yes, totally agree. If you don't feel comfortable with your finances then don't jump into buying a house. That could end badly for sure. I think if you talk about it and ask what would make him feel comfortable you can easily make it feel like his place too!
Also, depending on where you live, owning isn't necessarily better than renting. If you absolutely must get into a new space, consider the monthly cost of renting vs. owning while you save to buy something that suits you both better. MH used this Mortgage vs. Rent calculator to persuade me to wait until we had a bigger down payment to try to buy. I gotta tell ya, it worked. www.nytimes.com/interactive/2014/upshot/buy-rent-calculator.html?_r=0&abt=0002&abg=1
I do already own my house and wouldn't necessarily be taking on a larger mortgage (he actually owns a house, too, but we rent it out and it's even smaller). Because of the market and where we'd move to, we could keep the same payment, or close, but have more/better suited house. It's more a question of moving to a more well suited house now or waiting and moving to an even better house in a few years.
I've asked him what I can do to help him feel at home, and he has his own space and own bathroom (and actually whole own bedroom, if he organized it so) and he shuts down. I sort of think that's an excuse for why he doesn't do more throwing stuff away, organizing, etc. I'm the least territorial person so I'm fine with him moving stuff, changing stuff, etc., he just won't do it.
I think I'm going to just do as much throwing away/donating as I possibly can and keep working at it and see if he can get on board with that. Maybe if he sees progress he'll get more involved/feel better. Clutter makes your mind crazy!
I don't really love the house myself (I do love the yard) because when I moved in it was just me and a dog, we had plenty of space. Now it's me, him, two dogs and there's just stuff everywhere.
Anyone got tips or tricks for getting a pack rat to let go of stuff?!??