Post by NatalieDavid on Jul 7, 2015 10:03:53 GMT -5
*all the triggers*
So I'm back posting about my cousin again bc she is my worst trigger. She contacted me over the weekend about wanting to hang out and I felt I had to finally come clean with her. I told her it is just too hard for me to see her. I couldn't be around her and her cute little one and growing belly. She said she understands but she also was quick to add how sad she was too. Yes I'm sure she hurt for me but nothing compares to the hurt I feel inside. I am struggling everyday to just be me and go to work and even get out of bed. I'm just not satisfied with life at this time. Now today on Facebook she posts a photo of her growing belly. I had a complete fucking breakdown at work. Like lock myself in the bathroom crying breakdown. Then I tried to go back to my desk and quickly started bawling again now I'm sitting in my car writing this trying to get my shit together enough to go inside. I need to know things will get easier. Thank you for listening to my rant, I feel like this is the only place where I can vent and people can relate.
Post by fionnathehuman on Jul 7, 2015 10:34:50 GMT -5
I am so sorry you are going trough this... hugs...
I is going to get easier, I promise you...
I am sure she wants to help you and doesn't know how... Triggers sucks, but they suck even more when they are part of our family because whe can't just walk awa... Hugs. Take your time... maybe unfollow her on FB until you feel you can deal with it? That's what I did when I found out my SIL was pregnant. I was preg for the second time and our babies would be 2 months apart. It was really hard on me... while she was enjoying her problem free, first time pegancy and I was struggling with my second loss in a 5 month period...
Hang in there, we are here for you... Take one day at the time...
Hugs
**** now that I read my answer again I see so many Hugs...
BFP#1 April 2014 MC: June 9th 2014 BFP#2 Sept 2014 MC: Nov 05th 2014 BFP#3 April 2015 MMC: June 2015 BFP#4 January 2016 Birth : 09/08/2016 Baby A is now 29 months
NatalieDavid, sending you a ton of hugs. It's so difficult to avoid triggers especially when it's family, but I agree with fionnathehuman that hiding her on facebook temporarily until you're in a better place may be a good idea. She'll never know that she's hidden and you'll be able to have more control over a known trigger. Is it possible to go home early today, or take a long lunch to reset your day a bit? I'm so sorry that you're having a rough time.
Post by NatalieDavid on Jul 7, 2015 11:56:55 GMT -5
fionnathehuman hugs do help! soultrane I'm going to take you and Fionna's advice and block her from my feed. I've been keeping it bc I wanted to be strong and supportive but I think I need to focus on what I need right now.
fionnathehuman hugs do help! soultrane I'm going to take you and Fionna's advice and block her from my feed. I've been keeping it bc I wanted to be strong and supportive but I think I need to focus on what I need right now.
Absolutely. You need to focus on what will help you through this now. You can always check in on her when you're in a better place emotionally, but it's not going to help you to have unexpected triggers popping up all the time. Hopefully she's understanding while you work through this and will be there when you're in a better place. Again, big hugs. This stuff is so hard.
Hang in there, @nataliedavid. It will get easier to deal with this pain. It will. And i learnt along the way that nobody can truly understand what it feels like but you. Allow yourself to grieve the loss as much as you need to - even letting it out helps the healing process. I know it is not easy, but please please be gentle on yourself. Take care. Hugs.
I just wanted to chime in and say that it does get easier. I agree that it's a good idea that you hide her from your feed for a while. Sometimes, especially in a situation like this, you have to think about YOU. *hugs*
Married 01-04-2013 *AMA* 40 in June 2015 **1-19-15 Childless, not by choice" 1st EDD- 12-02-13 MC 5/1/13 @4w6d 2nd EDD 11-13-14 MC 4/15/14: discovered 1st twin @5w 2nd twin @10w 3Rd BFP- 10-10-14 EDD 6/16/15: MC 10-16-14 @5w2d
Me: 36, DH 32 Bfp#1 June 2014 edd: Feb. 22, 2015,mmc: Aug. 5,2014,D&C Bfp#2 Feb. 2015 edd: Oct.12, 2015, mmc: Mar. 7,2015, D&C
DX: Me: slightly hypothyroid, taking meds DH: SA Showed all low levels, urologist appointment showed all was normal, so no reason why the levels were bad.
Plan: IUI #1 Aug. 25mg clomed, to help boost egg quality - BFN IUI #2 Sept. 25mg clomed, BFN IUI#3 Dec. BFP!! TWINS Edd: Aug. 22, 2016
Me: 36, DH 32 Bfp#1 June 2014 edd: Feb. 22, 2015,mmc: Aug. 5,2014,D&C Bfp#2 Feb. 2015 edd: Oct.12, 2015, mmc: Mar. 7,2015, D&C
DX: Me: slightly hypothyroid, taking meds DH: SA Showed all low levels, urologist appointment showed all was normal, so no reason why the levels were bad.
Plan: IUI #1 Aug. 25mg clomed, to help boost egg quality - BFN IUI #2 Sept. 25mg clomed, BFN IUI#3 Dec. BFP!! TWINS Edd: Aug. 22, 2016
Married 01-04-2013 *AMA* 40 in June 2015 **1-19-15 Childless, not by choice" 1st EDD- 12-02-13 MC 5/1/13 @4w6d 2nd EDD 11-13-14 MC 4/15/14: discovered 1st twin @5w 2nd twin @10w 3Rd BFP- 10-10-14 EDD 6/16/15: MC 10-16-14 @5w2d
Post by NatalieDavid on Jul 9, 2015 8:14:17 GMT -5
Thank you for stopping in to check on me ladies. It has gotten better in the past month since I first had my loss but some days are just so hard. I'm glad I have you all to vent to when I'm having a bad day or am faced with a trigger. I'm taking it a day at a time and trying to take care of myself.
Glad you hear you are feeling a bit better NatalieDavid. Those people in our lives who are triggers can be so hard, because there is that sense of guilt that we are struggling to be happy for them and even be around them. When I found out a few weeks ago that my SIL was pregnant, I had a complete bawling meltdown, and my MC was in February. I'm not saying it doesn't get easier, it certainly does. But there is nothing wrong with minimizing contact (unfollowing on facebook, etc) with certain people while you heal. ((hugs)) I hope you continue to feel better, and remember that all the things you love about life are still there for you - family, friends, work, hobbies.
Post by michael24x7 on Sept 21, 2017 23:49:01 GMT -5
Hi friend, I am so sorry for your difficult situation in your life. I can understand your physical and mental stage at this time. I am feeling pity and pain from bottom of my heart. I want to pray God to provide sufficient energy to handle this difficult situation and positive way. You should not lose hope. Today we are living in Medical Research based treatment available we have you can easily overcome any type of a problem in easy and effective. I also have same situation like you. Now I am happy and healthy enjoying my marriage life that is dream of every woman to become perfect mother in life. Now it is your turn to convert your dream into reality. You should start your planning with positive attitude towards life. I want to forget those days of my life that are full of stress and depression due to miscarriage possibility. It is time to learn from your past mistakes. We consult with popular gynecologist to discuss my problem in detail. I want to suggest you to follow my powerful tips and tricks that help you to defeat these horrible problems in your life. You should spend valuable time in your hobby to enhance your creativity. You can play with children that help you to convert your imagination into reality. This is not easy job to handle this stressful situation. You should follow powerful yoga and meditation that help you to overcome this difficult situation. You should choose right path with proper understanding your body signal very well. It is clearly indicate that your body hormone level is not in balance due to stress and depression. You should give preference to healthy lifestyle and balanced diet to see magic effect in your life.
Oh Dear, I can totally relate to your situation. Infertility also left me feeling barren and isolated. I saw everyone around me happy with their complete families. It felt like I would never have one of my own. I used to dream about bearing a child but alas it was impossible. I got to know about surrogacy through the web. My husband was the first one who suggested it. I could not bring my mind around it. It felt like a weird idea. I was reluctant at first but gave in eventually. It was the best decision of my life. I could not have been any happier. My husband is happy. We finally have a complete family. I feel like whole again.
Hello. i am so so sorry. I think you should go for IVF or Surrogacy to have a child of your own. There are many famous centers that are willing to do it for you. In today's world, there are many many ways to get a baby. I went through surrogacy myself because i was unable to give birth on my own. I had to act normal and act like it did not matter looking at my friends getting their families expanded. I was introduced to surrogacy by my friend and i decided to go for it because i really wanted a child desperately in my life or else i do not think so that would have had been able to continue my life or my marriage successfully. My husband totally supported me. I looked up for clinics and found this amazing center called [DELETED]. its packages were not costly at all and it helped me to complete my life by getting what i had always been waiting. my baby is 2 now and i got my family and life completed. I don't know how you feel about my suggestion but i am speaking from my personal experience and want you to be happy in life too. instead of letting depression destroy you, you should think about getting what's causing it.
Post by jessicastarnes on Feb 18, 2018 23:38:32 GMT -5
Hi, I am really sorry to hear about your unhealthy condition.Dear be strong and keep trying with much positive thinking.It would happen soon in your life.I had my little boy with IVF.I am much worried about that.I was not trying to conceive for months its years.All my hopes going to be at an end.but finally, after 5 attempts of IVF get my baby.In the beginning, I don't know about anything.I am much scared if this will not work after hard struggle.what should I do?but thankfully we find it positive.I knew we are becoming frustrated after a long trying.I had just learned to be positive and keep fighting with infertility.It will turn into positive.Hope you have a good and healthy pregnancy in future.best wishes and my all good luck to you.
Well it's a part of life don't need to be worry about it. You see you have to give importance to everybody. If you cousin is calling you. No matter how much busy you are you have to attend her. See if you ignore her now. Later on when you are free you'll feel guilty about this. No matter how long you stay busy. you have to attend your family as well. Just tell yourself to be good with everybody. These type of little things happens in every family. Just ignore them. Stay happy and try to make others happy as well.
Well dear first of all I am so sorry to hear about your loss. IVF is really a good way. You can convince him by showing him the YouTube videos of IVF treatment cycles that is of [DELETED]. Those videos are going to change his mind definitely. I am sure. I recommend you those videos. Just simply search on YouTube about those videos. Those are very much helpful. I am sure it work for you.
Post by rosiejames on Apr 16, 2018 12:55:41 GMT -5
Natalie David, Love for you. Life is all about ups and downs. Life is hard for women and society makes it harder. But one should have enough courage to cope with such problems. No doubt you have bear a great loss. It doesn't mean that you lose the heart. Keep on trying and I'm sure that you'll get the destiny soon!
I'm anxious for the future. My years, my best years are passing me by. Time is so fast running out. Yesterday I was 20. I didn’t give a shit. Now I’m nearly 40 and the wind of change blows for someone else. I dreamt of having a baby since I was 30. 10 years are already left behind. I failed 4 IVFs. It was a moderate response from ovary. However, it’s not guaranteed my embryos survived. We just refused to prolong contacting one clinic in east Europe. It happened after two failed attempts with my own egg. The same picture, my embryos don’t want to reach the day 5th. The most difficult for me now is to accept surrogacy without my contribution. Would my children be born without my direct participation? What a weird hell? After million months of struggle I became OK with surrogacy. I know there’s no chance to keep on trying the other options. I watched how my classmates and cousins carried their lovely bellies. Doubtlessly, it’s so cute and touching. Why I’m still as thin as stub? They always asked me what was wrong. That’s me wrong there crying aloud because I wasted the best moment. I buried my hope. Even my man is rather wise to support me. He says we must move on. What the fuck “on”? He’s all right because he can give a sperm. I can give only my consent. I feel sorry for your stories hun! I’m happy with everyone who achieved awaited reward. Where could we scoop inspiration from? I forgot what it means to be inspired.
Post by sarahlietzo on May 12, 2018 1:03:04 GMT -5
Sorry to hear that you are still trying. Keep on trying was a good thing as long as you had some hope of conceiving. Now as the doctors can't even tell your problem of infertility. You should look for other options to have a baby now.
I was also trying from few years but had many complications. Although i conceived for 3 times but resulted in miscarriage everytime.
So i started looking for other methods of having a baby. And i came to know about surrogacy.
I contacted a clinic [DELETED] for surrogacy and soon i will get my dates of meeting with the clinic.
I'm from japan. We especially moved to Europe for surrogacy purpose. Than we came to know about this clinic and we moved to Ukraine. There we contacted this clinic. With the help of this clinic we have our two beautiful twin daughters. We are so thankful to the clinic that i can't tell you. And to the surrogate mother too who gave us so much happiness. We will never forget the clinic and the mother. Good luck with your next moving plan. Go for a good clinic. As clinic guidance is much important in every step. We also selected a good clinic for our surrogacy journey. The clinic carried out every cycle perfectly that now our surrogate is pregnant with our twin daughters. Soon we will fly back to Ukraine to get our girls.
Hey. I am so sorry. I know what kind of feeling I have. It is really a different feeling. Miscarriages take alot out of a woman. I know it must be hard for a woman to see the baby bumps. I have gone through such pain. I had 3 miscarriages which left me infertile. I feel jealous whenever I see a woman with babies. Then I decided to choose the unnatural way of having babies. I went for surrogacy. I went to a clinic in Europe. They provided me with a healthy surrogate. She gave birth to a healthy baby. Now I am a happy mother. I have no more wishes in my life.
Hello. I am so sad. I realize what sort of feeling I have. It is extremely an alternate feeling. Unsuccessful labours remove alot from a lady. I know it must be hard for a lady to see the child knocks. I have experienced such torment. I faced infertility for about 10 years. I feel desirous at whatever point I see a lady with babies. At that point, I chose to pick the unnatural method for having babies. I went for surrogacy. I went to a clinic in Europe. They gave me a sound surrogate. She brought forth a sound child. Presently I am a cheerful mother.
Post by lindajames998 on May 18, 2018 12:09:36 GMT -5
Hey there. How are you doing? I hope its all well now. I am really sad for you. I know how it feels. I lost a baby when I was in an accident. Don't stress yourself. I wish you good luck. Please take care.
Post by Glenna Johnson on May 19, 2018 9:55:56 GMT -5
Hi. Natalie your post just brings tears into my eyes. I am really feeling sorry for you. You have no fault in it. So please stop blaming yourself. you can be a mother. Consult with your doctor. I would suggest you go for surrogacy or IVF. As thousands of people are fulfilling their desires through this treatment. Don't need to worry. Instead of crying go for treatment and try hard. I will pray that you become a mother as soon as possible. Lots of wishes for you.
Natalie David that’s so bad. I know these conditions make a man selfish. But you shouldn’t act like that. Life will be merciful to you. just wait for your turn. Everything will become easy and possible. Keep patience. This may spoil your relations with others.
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