Lots of sympathy love-tits up in here! Looks like its "shitty SO Saturday" all round!
E is asleep but I'm on here, and seriously, all of these comments have me saying "me too! I can't believe him!" Why does it seem ok to them to just pretend they don't have new responsibilities too? I've been doing my best not to complain or nag DH, but it really is making me crazy. You're a parent now too, please act like it! Most of the time, he only holds the baby if I suggest it (hey... Maybe you should hold him while he's resting and happy, let him get used to your smell and touch) or if I'm crying or ready to yell at him for not ever helping me. Forget about remembering diaper changes or ever giving a bottle of pumped milk. He literally shuts down every time I've ever mentioned him feeding E and bonding with him that way. Why?
I honestly think they are scared. My DH is so afraid to do something wrong, he's 40 so clearly a big boy. He's great with almost all things baby and loves holding her now that I explained that I don't have super magical mommy powers and I'm learning as I go too. One of my bff's said just hand him the kid and don't go to them. Let him figure it out. Even if its not how you'd do it let him do it without helping. It's worked! Our problem is ALL the other shit around the house I need help with!
Post by mrsmonogrammed on Jul 18, 2015 7:25:01 GMT -5
First night not waking Charlotte up to eat, and she slept 9:30-3:30! I wish I could say I enjoyed it, but we're on a 9hr road trip to start vacation. Well, maybe I did enjoy not having a screaming baby for such a log car ride;)
You girls are going to hate me but, we've had very little middle of the night activity the past 3 nights! She nurses at 11:30 and is out till 6-7 and goes back to sleep till 9ish. I really hope this lasts cause I'm back to work tomorrow morning.
All the DH'S are in the doghouse it seems! I get frustrated with mine too because he will hold her all for 5 or 10 minutes and then put her in the swing. It irritates me every time. And he doesn't talk to her. He will play, but he says he doesn't know what to say to her. I think he feels silly or something, but idk.
On another note, last night she slept from 10:30 - 5:30! She's been sleeping like a champ at night here lately! She'll be 6 weeks on Monday, so I know that may all come crashing down in a few days though...
My H has been pretty great, outside of a few small frustrations. I think he is better at talking to and stimulating the baby than I am. He doesn't take the baby too often without me asking, but when I communicate that I need a break or need him to step in, he's always willing to help.
Mine too, but we certainly had our rough spots after DS1 was born. He couldn't read my mind, so I had to get better at specifically asking for help in a nice way, which wasnt alw easy bc I was bitterpants about his "daily escape" from us (work) and all of the adult interaction he got. Now we know how to interact and he generally looks after Ds1 while I handle Ds2. I'm the milk machine afterall.
I think we are in for a bad night. LO fights sleep - always has, I even joked about it when he was in utero - but the last few days he's not taken his usual 5:30-7:30 nap and doesn't fall asleep until 9:30 - when he finally just crashes after crying and fighting everything... I hope it's part of the growth spurt
My LO has been cluster feeding in the late afternoon/early evening - she nursed pretty much continually from 5-9 pm last night with a few breaks. We put her to bed at 9:30 and she was up at 12:30 to nurse for 25 minutes before falling back asleep. Funny how she can nurse for over an hour during the day and then be done after 20 minutes at night!
Post by pghtruelove on Jul 19, 2015 0:33:42 GMT -5
Finally cleaned the bedroom today. I realized how gross we were since we hadn't changed the sheets in forever. Or vaccumed. Or dusted. Or done nonbaby laundry. Now I'm nursing J and hoping she has a good strech of sleep tonight.
Finally cleaned the bedroom today. I realized how gross we were since we hadn't changed the sheets in forever. Or vaccumed. Or dusted. Or done nonbaby laundry. Now I'm nursing J and hoping she has a good strech of sleep tonight.
My whole house feels gross. DH does not get it, but he generally helps with the kitchen. Our rooms sees the most neglect. I got sheets done, and finallly put away my clothes. The rest of it is still lacking. But I vacuumed the kitchen and livingroom!
Post by ravinraven216 on Jul 19, 2015 0:52:48 GMT -5
I'm not certain when we made it to bed (probably between 11 and 11:30, but LO was nice and swaddled and I've heard nary a peep from him tonight. It's almost 2am here and I had to get up to pump since he didn't get up to eat like usual - I went to his room to retrieve my pump and to verify he's still breathing. It's a miracle he's gone this long. Best birthday present ever.
Post by whoopsadaisy on Jul 19, 2015 1:22:07 GMT -5
ravinraven216 - yay! Happy Birthday! Hope it keeps going.
We are visiting my parents and this kid has had so much attention from them he only slept for 20-30 mins a few times today. He usually takes much longer naps at home. Thought because of that maybe he's sleep more that 3 hrs...nope. Went to be bed at 10:30 and up at 1:30 to eat. Maybe the "sleep well during the day, sleep well at night'" is true? But he also keeps this pattern when he naps better during the day. Idk - maybe I need to just stop overthinking this and let him do whatever baby things he wants to do.
Post by sugarkissed on Jul 19, 2015 2:37:34 GMT -5
I'm pretty certain I'll never sleep again. The past week or so I can't get LO to go down for the night for the life of me. 1:30 am and we've had one 30 minute stretch so far.
Post by baytosa2013 on Jul 19, 2015 3:01:20 GMT -5
We are up for our usual feeding. The past few days we've been having trouble with her being fussy right before bed but I continue our night time routine and put her down even though she isn't passed out milk drunk like normal. She's been putting herself to sleep! I leave her awake but clearly tired and drowsy and turn on her sound machine and vibrate on the bouncy chair in a mostly dark room. Come back 5-10 mins later and boom asleep!
Post by carolyngrace on Jul 19, 2015 20:29:39 GMT -5
Trying a second night of modified "cry it out" (just for lack of a better term).
Last night DH discovered DB could cry himself to sleep in 3 or 4 minutes, while he was preparing a bottle. So this morning I tried it again at nap time, and it worked.
So essentially we're letting him cry for up to 5 minutes, as long as he doesn't hit a full-on scream (because if he gets that upset I don't think he can calm himself back down). So far he did it once, and seemed to be asleep for a few minutes, and then woke up more upset and I went and comforted him. When I went to him he fell almost instantly asleep in my arms, so I put him back down. Now he's crying again but it's only been 2 minutes so I'm waiting.
Before this we were bouncing him on the exercise ball for up to an hour, alternating with nursing, to get him to fall deeply asleep before putting him down. My back and boobs were killing me every night. And sometimes he would be crying & screaming WHILE we did that stuff, so it was really frustrating. I wonder now if he was just over-stimulated or over-tired at that point...
Any STMs had success with DB putting themselves to sleep this young? He's 7 weeks...
p.s. I realize it could change very quickly also. He may be able to do this right now and next week not handle it.
Post by pghtruelove on Jul 19, 2015 22:12:08 GMT -5
carolyngrace good luck! I hope it keeps working out for you!
Jules has been crying and screaming since about 7:30 pm. Lots of spitting up too. She seems to be very sensitive to what I eat and I think what I ate was too greasy for her. So far she doesn't mind when I eat turkey sandwiches, fruit, nuts, oatmeal, and some veggies. This is frustrating.
Hopefully we can get her to calm down and sleep soon. We are exhausted.
LO nursed from 9-10 and was solidly asleep. I didn't get to bed until 10:30. 11:00 rolls around and bam! Awake baby! I have a root canal assessment at 8:45 and I'm already exhausted, so I'm praying for a good stretch of sleep after this nurse!
Post by silv3rlining on Jul 19, 2015 23:40:40 GMT -5
LO is up "early" for her 1st MOTN feed. I have yet to go to bed. It's 20 til 1 and I'm still up. Movers are supposed to be here at 8... DH & I have so much to do...I think he's kicking himself now for not being more on top of it like I've been saying for weeks.
Trying a second night of modified "cry it out" (just for lack of a better term).
Last night DH discovered DB could cry himself to sleep in 3 or 4 minutes, while he was preparing a bottle. So this morning I tried it again at nap time, and it worked.
So essentially we're letting him cry for up to 5 minutes, as long as he doesn't hit a full-on scream (because if he gets that upset I don't think he can calm himself back down). So far he did it once, and seemed to be asleep for a few minutes, and then woke up more upset and I went and comforted him. When I went to him he fell almost instantly asleep in my arms, so I put him back down. Now he's crying again but it's only been 2 minutes so I'm waiting.
Before this we were bouncing him on the exercise ball for up to an hour, alternating with nursing, to get him to fall deeply asleep before putting him down. My back and boobs were killing me every night. And sometimes he would be crying & screaming WHILE we did that stuff, so it was really frustrating. I wonder now if he was just over-stimulated or over-tired at that point...
Any STMs had success with DB putting themselves to sleep this young? He's 7 weeks...
p.s. I realize it could change very quickly also. He may be able to do this right now and next week not handle it.
Mine puts himself to sleep at bed time. Naps are not as good, but I figure they'll get better when he can get in more of a napping schedule, rather than just whenever he falls asleep. I generally have a 5 minute rule too, even for my girls if they get up in the night. Unless they're screaming or saying they need to go potty, I give them 5 minutes to see if they can get themselves back to sleep on their own.
He's up for his first motn feeding after a 5 hour stretch of sleep. I of course miraculously wasn't tired/couldn't sleep for the first 3 or 4 hours of thar block. Boo. 5 hour stretches are so rare and I have yet to enjoy one to the fullest. All I get out of it are engorged super soakers.
I have no idea what to expect from tonight but it won't be pretty, I'm sure. We did a short road trip to the mountains today. LO slept the whole trip. The whole damn trip. Hour and a half drive up there. The whole time we had lunch. While we were hiking. The drive home. When we stopped for a drink. The rest of the drive. Nine straight freaking hours the child slept, with the exception of a few minutes of squawking, followed by quickly nursing and going right back out sometime around 4:00 pm. We got home at 9 pm and he has been wide awake since then. Absolutely delightful, smiley, and adorably wide awake and he shows zero signs of going to sleep any time soon. Not that I blame him. I'd be bouncing off the walls too if I had slept for nine straight hours today. Except I didn't so...
Kiddo was on the boob, with diaper change breaks, from 5:30 to 9. He'd just sit there with the boob in his mouth if he wasn't eating and would cry when not on it. Pacifier was not an acceptable sub. I feel like it's been like this all day - guess our growth spurt isn't over. He's asleep as of 9:30. I'm hoping for sleep tonight in good chunks. FX for all of us!!
Post by wegrowsheep on Jul 20, 2015 0:33:12 GMT -5
LO finally fell asleep about 30 min ago (10pm). He was asleep briefly before that, but my older children have no concept of "go to bed" or "stay in your bed" or "sweet jesus stop talking and go the f to sleep!" (didn't say it, but thought it), so they kept waking him up. And they're still awake.
LO gave me a 4 hr stretch last night though! His longest yet, at 6+ wks....
Dd is in the 'no mom, let me sleep on your bed not the bassinet' stage right now. Doesn't matter how long I've waited, even if she's asleep for an hour before I move her, as soon as she's in there she's screaming.
2.5 hours in to this wake session. He's eaten twice, had a poo and fart party, 2 sessions of laying on the floor, and lots of cuddles. What's the deal son? Mommy wants to lay down too.
After making me walk and jiggle her from 9-11 pm, soph slept til 2. She required two diaper changes while she was eating and is finally sleeping! Praying she'll sleep til between 6 and 6:30 so DH can deal with her before work... What are the odds?
I stupidly scheduled her 1 month ped appt for 3:30 when I would like to be napping. Already full of dread!
Lol where is my 4 hour sleeper?! She slept really well during the day yesterday so I'm not sure if this is why we're having 1-2 hour stretches of sleep, if that. She got up at 1:00-ish and I made H give her a bottle since it was the second time we had been asleep for a half hour. Then again at 3, she's up. I need to get up around six, so it would be fantastic if she slept until then, please!
Then Comes Family, LLC is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising
program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com.