*STM+ check in*

[Deleted]

How are you feeling? Better, worse or the same as last time?

What will the age gap(s) be between LO(s)?

How do you think LO will react to a new baby?

If you are a +er how did the transition go last time? Better, worse or how you expected? What was that age gap?

What is your biggest fear about bringing home another LO?

*FTMs, please feel welcome to ask questions in the thread if any pop up based off STM+ answers.

[wittyandwaiting]

How are you feeling? Better, worse or the same as last time?

Worse. I was much younger when I had DS so I think my body was more resilient.

What will the age gap(s) be between LO(s)? 14 years.

How do you think LO will react to a new baby? He already knows I'm pregnant and he's happy so far so I anticipate that the happiness will continue.

What is your biggest fear about bringing home another LO?
I'm not sure I have one yet: maybe the idea of having a teen and a toddler at the same time since both can be pretty wild.

[Deleted]

How are you feeling? Better, worse or the same as last time?
More nausea, more exhaustion, more tenderness, more back pain. Pregnancy with DD was super easy, other than my stomach getting big I hardly realized I was pregnant.

What will the age gap(s) be between LO(s)?
3.3 years, DD turns 3 in late December

How do you think LO will react to a new baby?
I think DD will be excited for a day and then want the baby to go away. I think DD would have made a good only child.

What is your biggest fear about bringing home another LO?
That I'll like DD more than the baby. The newborn phase was insanely difficult with DD but she's easy now, hilarious, cute, sly. We had so much time, just the two of us, and I'll never have that with #2. I feel like I'll always sort of "get DD better."

[doodler]

How are you feeling? Better, worse or the same as last time?
Better. So much better that it's a little scary. By 6 weeks last time I had terrible nausea. Not a bit this time.

What will the age gap(s) be between LO(s)?
2.5 years.

How do you think LO will react to a new baby?
He is so little so I think there will be jealousy because he's not doing much independent play yet. A few years from now I think he will love having someone to play with. He loves other kids.


What is your biggest fear about bringing home another LO?
I just remember how hard the first year was with DS and it scares me to have an infant and a 2 year old. Also DH just got a promotion that involves much longer hours at work. Not having backup is terrifying.

[lilmonk]

How are you feeling? Better, worse or the same as last time?

Better. It's a bit scary because I'm feeling like it's too good to be true. I was extremely sick before and had horrible painful boobs and no energy.

What will the age gap(s) be between LO(s)?

3 years 9-10 months

How do you think LO will react to a new baby?

I don't know. I think he'll be okay, but he's been the baby of the family for so long that that may bring up issues.

What is your biggest fear about bringing home another LO?

Will I cope on my own with two when DH starts leaving for work after his parental leave? I was pretty overwhelmed the first time and had PND and some dark days in the beginning. I know have more support as we are closer to DH's family but I have issues with asking them for help.

[Deleted]

Aug 15, 2015 7:20:46 GMT -5 buttercup said:

Last week, I felt worse. Now, I feel pretty good. Nausea and morning sickness has diminished.

LO will be 4.5 years older.

We haven't told LO yet. We will after the ultrasound. I think she will be excited. She said she wants a baby sister for her birthday. She was around a newborn and reacted well. She is independent enough now.

Redoing the newborn stage. I haven't thought much in the future yet. People have commented to me not having another kid during their ideal 2-3 year timeframe, and that bothered me, but LO is so independent and helpful now.

We had originally planned on closer to a 4 year gap but... that didn't happen. I thought DD would adjust better if she were older, more independent.

[wittyandwaiting]

Aug 15, 2015 6:48:57 GMT -5 @aest said:

What is your biggest fear about bringing home another LO?
That I'll like DD more than the baby. The newborn phase was insanely difficult with DD but she's easy now, hilarious, cute, sly. We had so much time, just the two of us, and I'll never have that with #2. I feel like I'll always sort of "get DD better."

After reading this I realized that I share the same worry, DS and I are super close, especially because it was just the two of us in his early years.

[britta]

How are you feeling? Better, worse or the same as last time?
Better. So far. But I'm barely 5 weeks along so there's still time.

What will the age gap(s) be between LO(s)?
2.5 years, almost exactly

How do you think LO will react to a new baby?
He adores his new baby cousin so I'm hoping positively, but he's very much a mama's boy so I do worry what will happen when he realizes the baby doesn't leave

If you are a +er how did the transition go last time? Better, worse or how you expected? What was that age gap?
N/A

What is your biggest fear about bringing home another LO?
I feel weird about this pregnancy. Like I'm somehow cheating on DS. I know it's crazy, but I sorta feel like I'm cheating on him. I'm afraid of not being able to love another as much as I love him.

*FTMs, please feel welcome to ask questions in the thread if any pop up based off STM+ answers.

[Deleted]

I also sort of worry that I'm going to mess up mine and DD's relationship while pregnant. I'm usually so much more patient and love to let her do things by herself but right now I can tell I'm getting frustrated with her. I made her cry yesterday and I felt just horrible.

[bluedot]

I feel better. Last time I was hyper aware of my symptoms. This time not so much. The nausea didn't kick in until 7w last time though, so we will see...

DS will be 2 years 2 month older.

I think there will be some jealousy. But the family I babysit for are having a baby in October, so DS will have a few months around a new baby to get the hang of it.

I'm nervous about a toddler and a baby at the same time. DS has become a decent napper, and sleeper at night I don't want his schedule to get messed up.

[likethewheels]

How are you feeling? Better, worse or the same as last time?
Worse. Way worse. M/s started earlier, and is more severe. I'm really concerned about keeping my job if it gets worse - I've been working two months and have no vacation/sick time so I'm praying this is short-lived because I'm struggling.

What will the age gap(s) be between LO(s)?
2 years and 2 months.

How do you think LO will react to a new baby?
I'm not sure yet. He does well with bigger kids and kids his age but he hasn't been around an infant.

What is your biggest fear about bringing home another LO?
The playing fields will be even - it's not like when I tag DH in now, and I can be "off duty". I feel like I can barely keep my head above water between work and one LO, so there will definitely be some adjustments that need to be made. I know we'll find a balance eventually, but until then I'll just stew in my anxiety.

Eta: praying the m/s is short-lived, obviously. 

[MissMusic]

How are you feeling? Better, worse or the same as last time?
Worse. A whole lot worse.

What will the age gap(s) be between LO(s)?
Almost 4 yrs

How do you think LO will react to a new baby?
I think she'll be excited. She absolutely loves babies, is very gentle with them, etc.


What is your biggest fear about bringing home another LO?
Having enough quality time with each kid individually; having the energy to be a good mom to both. Also, sleeping and behavior: DD is fabulous with behavior, eating, sleeping, etc. She's a dream. #2 will be just as good, right...?

[MissMusic]

Aug 15, 2015 7:20:46 GMT -5 buttercup said:

Redoing the newborn stage. I haven't thought much in the future yet. People have commented to me not having another kid during their ideal 2-3 year timeframe, and that bothered me, but LO is so independent and helpful now.

I'm hoping this is the case with us, too. She'll be in preschool, she can wipe her own ass and pick up her own toys, etc.  She's not as dependent on us.  I think it will be incredibly helpful for 1) alone time with baby while Kid is in school, and 2) not having to do ALL the "baby stuff" with 2 young ones.  If #1 likes to help, they can get involved with Baby and "help' mommy out.  Not to mention your body has started to really rebuild and hold nutrients that were lost or given to kid #1, so thats good news for #2.

I think that 4 yrs is a great age gap.

[beyoncepadthai]

Aug 15, 2015 6:35:35 GMT -5 @aest said:

How are you feeling? Better, worse or the same as last time? I feel worse this time. I didn't have MS last time.

What will the age gap(s) be between LO(s)? 3 1/2 years

How do you think LO will react to a new baby?
I think he'll be excited.

If you are a +er how did the transition go last time? Better, worse or how you expected? What was that age gap?

What is your biggest fear about bringing home another LO? I have a lot of anxiety about taking DS out by myself. So going out and about with 2 is scary.

*FTMs, please feel welcome to ask questions in the thread if any pop up based off STM+ answers.

[danenikki]

Aug 15, 2015 6:35:35 GMT -5 @aest said:

How are you feeling? Better, worse or the same as last time? MS came on quicker and I'm exhausted. So the same as with DD

What will the age gap(s) be between LO(s)? 32 months

How do you think LO will react to a new baby? I hope good but I'm sure she will have some jealousy

If you are a +er how did the transition go last time? Better, worse or how you expected? What was that age gap?

What is your biggest fear about bringing home another LO? How to handle it. The lack of sleep with a toddler scares me. 

[minae01]

How are you feeling? Better, worse or the same as last time? Worse! I had all-day nausea with both boys, but I feel so much sicker this time. I even gave into meds (Diclegis) because I need to be functional. I didn't take anything in my prior pregnancies.

What will the age gap(s) be between LO(s)? DS1 will be 3.5 and DS2 will be 23 months.

How do you think LO will react to a new baby? I have no idea. DS1 can be very sensitive and caring when he wants. He also can be a total asshole to his little brother, so who knows? DS2 will probably be sweet and cuddly with the baby - but that could change as his personality evolves before the baby is born.

If you are a +er how did the transition go last time? Better, worse or how you expected? What was that age gap? My boys are 18 months apart. The transition was very rough. DS2 was colicky and couldn't be put down for long. I'm hoping that this transition will be better, but it's going to have a lot to do with how good this baby is!

What is your biggest fear about bringing home another LO? That I won't be able to handle 3 kids. I feel like our hands are full, but we've always wanted 3, so we're taking the plunge. H is a huge help, so I'm going to count on him for a lot. I'm nervous about missing out on quality time with my boys. Also, the possibility of having 3 boys is terrifying now that this pregnancy is real! Boys are awesome but quite a handful!

[samesister]

How are you feeling? Better, worse or the same as last time? I am feeling about the same. Just this constant nausea which is bearable. I'll take it!

What will the age gap(s) be between LO(s)? They will be 2 yrs 9 mos apart

How do you think LO will react to a new baby? She is really great with other babies and I think she will do okay at first. But once she realizes that the baby will take my attention away from her, she may act out. She is the the only grandchild on mine and DH's side so she is used to being the center of attention.


What is your biggest fear about bringing home another LO? Just like everyone else says, I hope I can balance time between both LOs. And I fear taking two kids out in public. I can handle my toddler on my own but with a baby it'll be quite different.

[ellewills618]

How are you feeling? Better, worse or the same as last time? About the same but with more indigestion. I can't really complain because this LO lets me drink coffee & it was a huge aversion with DS.

What will the age gap(s) be between LO(s)? 26 months

How do you think LO will react to a new baby? No idea. We have a great relationship and I am very attuned to his needs. I'm afraid he's going to be pretty jealous and upset when he has to wait for baby. He loves other kids though so that should help, I hope.

What is your biggest fear about bringing home another LO? All the fears! How to get quality time with each kid. How to handle a crazy toddler and a baby, especially when DH is traveling & no family close by. Not sleeping for a whole year straight again. How to love another LO as much as I love DS. I know I'll figure it out but whoa. Lots to consider.

[JoeLies]

I'm feeling pretty much the same so far; no real complaints (knock on wood).

C will be about 28 months.

I think he'll be great as long as we frame him as my helper. He generally loves babies and is uncharacteristically gentle around them.

I'm planning to send C to daycare during my leave so I worry about that hurting his feelings. I also worry about PPA/PPD but C is certainly my bigger concern.

[iamlindabelcher]

How are you feeling? Better, worse or the same as last time?
Currently Better.

What will the age gap(s) be between LO(s)?
21 Months

How do you think LO will react to a new baby?
I think he'll be jealous.



What is your biggest fear about bringing home another LO?
I'm not joking, I'm terrified I'll be distracted with newb and someone will kidnap DS. I have panic attacks about how I'm going to keep them both safe at the same time.

[doublehammock]

How are you feeling? Better, worse or the same as last time?
Good actually.

What will the age gap(s) be between LO(s)?
A little over 3.5 if (when!) I make to term.

How do you think LO will react to a new baby?
I think we'll go though lots to phases. But he's a helper and I think he'll be excited.

What is your biggest fear about bringing home another LO?
Splitting my time. I already nanny a 1 year old and that's been challenging at times with DS looking for attention. I'm terrified of bed rest and a long hospital stay or NICU time which would keep me away from DS.

[lecky11]

How are you feeling? Better, worse or the same as last time? Great so far. All day MS and vomiting started last time at 5 weeks so we'll see next week.

What will the age gap(s) be between LO(s)?Almost 3 weeks shy of 24 months

How do you think LO will react to a new baby? DD loves babies and little kids as long as mommy isn't holding them so I'm not sure how it will go.

If you are a +er how did the transition go last time? Better, worse or how you expected? What was that age gap?

What is your biggest fear about bringing home another LO? DH doesn't get home until after bedtime 4 days a week, so it will be interesting taking care of a newborn and toddler by myself. I also feel bad that DD won't have all my time.

[ellewills618]

doublehammock NICU time is one of my biggest fears as well. It was so hard when DS was in there and I can't even fathom how you do it with another LO at home. I'm going to be the patient doctors hate for the last 2 months because every twinge will have me on the nurse line or begging to come in. I'm going to have to find a doc with a lot of patience and empathy.

[minae01]

Aug 15, 2015 20:17:53 GMT -5 doublehammock said:

How are you feeling? Better, worse or the same as last time?
Good actually.

What will the age gap(s) be between LO(s)?
A little over 3.5 if (when!) I make to term.

How do you think LO will react to a new baby?
I think we'll go though lots to phases. But he's a helper and I think he'll be excited.

What is your biggest fear about bringing home another LO?
Splitting my time. I already nanny a 1 year old and that's been challenging at times with DS looking for attention. I'm terrified of bed rest and a long hospital stay or NICU time which would keep me away from DS.

Yes, I was (and still am) afraid of this, too. With the P17 shots, I made it to 36w with DS2 and no NICU time! There is a good chance that you will not have a preemie! On the preemie board, there are lots of success stories of women going FT after preemie.

[minae01]

ellewills618, I panicked and called the dr at 23w last time because I felt "pressure" down there. They got me right in (last apt of the day), did a check and ffn test, and everything was fine. The pressure feeling is totally normal, but they appeased my preemie-mom anxiety! Don't ever feel bad about calling and being proactive.

How early was your DS?

[ellewills618]

@minea01 DS came at 35+3 due to a partial abruption. I'm going to be speaking to my new OB about p17 as well because my ob with DS said we'd try it with the next pregnancy. I'm praying for any more time we can get. I have no problem being a squeaky wheel if it's for the well being of this baby!

[aluzitano]

I feel a little worse than last time, I suppose...more queasy, more food-aversiony, and more spacey. However, I had a really easy pregnancy last time, so my symptoms this time around, though more noticeable, aren't too bad.

LOs will be 18 or so months apart

I have no idea how LO will react. She likes other babies right now - I mean, she's interested in them and likes to touch them and watch them - but she's only 8.5 months old so things will be very different when this baby comes!

Having 2 under 2 is pretty mind boggling right now...hubby and I were planning on trying again soon after Norah turned 1, but this BFP wasn't planned and was a HUGE shocker, unlike last time, which was totally planned. It's taking me a bit to get my head wrapped around, since I don't know what norah will be like as a toddler...she's not even crawling yet, so I have nothing to go on as to her energy level! She's a really easy baby though, so hopefully that'll continue throughout her life! :-P

[steveo]

How are you feeling? Better, worse or the same as last time? Pretty similar. It's early yet.

What will the age gap(s) be between LO(s)? M will be just over 4 1/2.

How do you think LO will react to a new baby? Awesome. He's made to be a big brother. Ever since we lost J, he asks constantly if we can "get another baby". It fucking kills me every time.

If you are a +er how did the transition go last time? Better, worse or how you expected? What was that age gap? Last time M was 2 1/2, and he was awesome with J for the two weeks he was home before our 7 month ICU odyssey. All he ever wanted to do was to help us with him. It was the same when we brought J home from the hospital the following summer. The more people the better as far as M is concerned.

What is your biggest fear about bringing home another LO? I have zero fear once we're home, it's actually managing to get home with a healthy child that is my biggest fear.

[steveo]

ellewills618, minae01, I understand that fear completely, but know that if it happens you and your LOs will get through it. Before things really went wrong, J had a 13 day NICU stay post birth. We had grandparents pitching in, Max at a lot of junk food for a week, and everyone was a-okay afterwards. The longer term hospitalization was more complicated, but even that we managed. You'll do what you have to do to get your kids and family through it

[ciaobaby]

How are you feeling? Better, worse or the same as last time? I'm feeling a little more queasy this time; haven't gotten sick or anything yet though so it's not too bad!

What will the age gap(s) be between LO(s)? 22 months

How do you think LO will react to a new baby? He loves other kids and has done well with the new baby at the sitter, so I'm hoping he will be fine! Just worried about him being jealous of the new baby.

If you are a +er how did the transition go last time? Better, worse or how you expected? What was that age gap? N/A

What is your biggest fear about bringing home another LO? DS was SUCH a good baby right from the start...eating, sleeping, happy/silly personality, so I feel like we were extremely lucky! I know every baby is different, so I am nervous #2 will be a colicky, crying baby who won't eat or sleep well!