Is anyone else teary eyed? Tomorrow will be one year from my BFP! Sea Bandz for morning sickness. Peppermint tea helped me a lot too. Buy nursing tops whenever possible instead of a regular maternity top, you'll be so happy that you did. Motherhood has the best jeans and great tips, but you can get some pretty nice comfy shirts from Ross also. Have lots of sex with DH whenever you're in the mood. Your sex drive will change a lot throughout your pregnancy and even more after the LO arrives. Love your body and all the changes. You're making a tiny human and that's amazing.
First, awww, congratulations! It's just about a year since my BFP, and my life is completely different and amazing!
Second - Get the Snoogle. It's $60, and worth it. My 3 year old loves it still, so it's not obselete after pregnancy!
Third - We're planners, and we survived being Team Green. Not finding out the sex made for probably the biggest excitement of my life, and I never once regretted it!
Fourth - When you research birth plans, think of everything as a possibility. Don't rule out an epidural, C-section, early delivery....anything can happen, and having run through the scenario before will help!
Fifth - older women are incredibly wise....but they had kids a long time ago. Take all advice with a grain of salt! Last but not least - spring for the maternity shoot! And take tons of pics. Even if it's the same pose in your dirty ass bathroom that you don't share with anyone....do it.
Again, congrats and welcome to the club!!
Edit - August newborns hardly need anything besides cute onesies! Spend money on the 0-3 & 3 month clothes!
Post by laurasuzanne2006 on Nov 22, 2015 1:25:55 GMT -5
Do your research. As a nurse I don't believe in trusting a doctor 100%. Obviously pick a provider that shares your views. Things may not go according to plan, but if you make researched decisions it can make your feelings about your situation very different. Doulas are awesome. Adequate support can make or break your birth.
Even through all the pregnancy difficulties that can arise try and remember how special it is. It will be over soon
The snoogle is a MUST! But get the jersey knit cover. The regular one was really scratchy.
Don't get mad at people who tell you to get your sleep now. I was always so annoyed, because how can you sleep when you are SO uncomfortable and are getting up to pee every 10 seconds? It turns out they were right. Sleep. Get it. All of it.
+1 for getting a lactation consultant. Breastfeeding comes natural for some baby/mom pairs, not so much for others. Remember, you are both learning so be patient, it can be HARD. Find support if you need it. If you don't want to breastfeed, you don't have to. Feed your baby, that's all that matters.
You are growing a HUMAN! In your body! A whole freaking person! There will be times you want to quit, you hate the way you look, you feel like crap, you hurt, etc. You are amazing, you are beautiful. Love your body. It's performing nothing short of a miracle! Take it one day at a time, one hour at a time. Relax as much as possible. Remember... a miracle!
Think about your labor, read some books, but remember... your body knows what to do. Doctors and nurses will help. For gosh sakes don't forget to read up on what you're supposed to do AFTER the baby is born. Wow did I drop the ball there. Labor is not the end point, it's only the beginning, lol.
Post by runningmommy519 on Nov 22, 2015 3:55:14 GMT -5
For STM's
Rest. I know you want to spend as much time as you can with DD or DS but rest when you can.There is nothing wrong with extra screen time and snuggles on the couch while you get your feet up. Many of you are either working and chasing a toddler around or chasing a toddler around. Rest rest rest!
You will likely be sad because you will wonder how will you find room in your heart to love another. (You will) You will be sad because your routine of spending time with your oldest will change. But in time you will find a new normal.
You will wonder how DD or DS will adjust to a new sibling. They will. It might be easy or it might be hard but they will adjust. FYI your heart will explode when they meet. It will explode into a billion pieces.
Let your oldest help as much as possible. They can pick out clothes, get diapers or wipes. Then can get blankets or put the pacifier back in. It makes them feel good to help.
Don't rely on the Internet for your info. Take everything with a grain of salt. Use it as a tool but trust yourself/gut. There is a lot of gloom and doom on the inter webs.
Your life isn't over after baby. Talk to your partner NOW about your expectations of parenting and baby care. Mom shouldn't do all of the work. They should be involved. Don't wait until you haven't slept for 3 days to break down and ask them for help. Parenting is a partnership.
Yes you will sleep, have sex and enjoy life after baby. It will take time, but baby's aren't little forever! The first 2-3 weeks are the hardest but you'll get the hang of it.
Relax and enjoy yourself. Get your nails done. Get a massage. Exercise.
You are beautiful no matter how you think you feel about your pregnant self.
Water, water, water,and some more water. When you think you've had all the water, drink some more.
Stool softners, every single day if needed.
Eat healthy but don't be scared to indulge every once in awhile.
Leggings will be your best friend.
So will a body pillow.
Its ok to cry, at nothing at all. Thank you hormones. And don't be surprised to get angry over stupid shit, it won't feel stupid atm, but when you realize it is, remember hormones.
Baby kicks, hiccups, and ultra sounds are always reassuring. And my favorite parts of pregnancy.
Realize how amazing you and your body are, you're growing a little human!!!!
Breastfeeding may hurt, like- putting your nipple in an electric pencil sharpener. Eventually you will both get the hang of it and it will stop hurting and only be mildly annoying. Watching about proper latch on the YouTube will help with this. Also if you are using lanolin because the hospital hands it out like cheap lolipops, be prepared to be underwelmed. Get some nipple butter with either cocnut or olive oil, they work much better.
Labor and delivery are unpredictable try to keep expectations to a minimum and you won't be as disappointed when things go a stray.
Post by bibliothecary on Nov 22, 2015 9:01:38 GMT -5
If you're planning on a home birth, don't effing tell ANYONE. Yes, it's perfectly safe with a good midwife, low risk pregnancy, and a backup plan. But a lot of people will hardcore judge you for it (out of concern; they're not trying to be jerks). If you tell people that you're planning a home birth, they usually hear "I'm going to dig a birthing trench in the backyard and maybe a wolverine will steal the placenta." So, yeah, I'm not going to tell you how to run your shit, but be careful about who you tell.
That said, my home birth was awesome, I would totally do it again for any future kids (health permitting), and if you ever have any questions, PM me. I mean it. We can chat all about mucus plugs.
You are beautiful. Your body is beautiful. You can loose the weight using that stroller you spent so much time researching
Everyone likes to tell stories about how they immediately fell in love with their baby as soon as their eyes met. This may not happen right away. It's OK. It will. When it does it is truly one of the greatest, all consuming loves you will ever experience.
Get a Netflix account.
Have backup clothes in your car. A shirt for you, outfit for baby, and diapers.
Post by bibliothecary on Nov 22, 2015 9:16:57 GMT -5
PgAL moms, this is for you: rejoice in your pregnancy. Being scared is normal, but try not to let it keep you from feeling happy about this pregnancy. Have someone on call to talk you off the ledge when you get scared. And you will get scared. It would be weird if you didn't. Spend time with other PgAL moms, either on here or in person. You'll need them more than you know.
Research now what lip and tongue ties look like. Many doctors are not good at spotting them and fixing one early can save you pain and low supply issues.
If you live in a warmer area, get the Aden and Anais muslin swaddle blankets. They're the best! And a linen ring sling or wrap.
Get a snoogle. My H gave up and let me have the whole bed with my snoogle the last month of pregnancy (slept in the guest room). I was kinda sad not sharing a bed but soooo much more comfy.
Don't judge yourself over how early you start wearing maternity pants. Or how late. Some of us are 4 months pp and still wearing them....
Drink as much water as humanly possible. Then drink some more.
If you're taking Zofran, take a stool softener.
If something seems off, call your doctor. Better to get reassurance that everything's ok than to spend the days/weeks until your next appointment worrying. And if you're not comfortable with your provider, find a new one. You need someone you can trust and who will advocate for you.
Have a plan, but be prepared to abandon most of it. Know your options and your rights so you can make informed decisions, because you many end up with about 2 minutes to make that decision.
Buy a good pair of flip flops. They may be all you're wearing the last few months.
If you have to be on magnesium before/after labor, write everything down or log it on your phone. It will screw with you memory. I'm so glad I learned that from a mom on this board.
So, read all the threads, ask all the questions, share your experiences. The ladies on your BMB could become some of the best friends you'll ever make. You'll help each other through this.
You do not owe it to anyone to allow them to watch the birth or be there at the hospital waiting. Tell them no if you don't want it. Labor is a time for you to be as comfortable as possible not put out by relatives.
Lots of babies love to sleep on or near their mothers. Even if you hate the idea and have no intention of cosleeping read the safe cosleeping guidelines now. Better to know how to do it safely than make a mistake when you are sleep deprived and just want baby to sleep.
I nth the idea that baby carriers are amazing. I vote ring sling for a really little then a soft structured carrier for later.
Post by motownthrowdown on Nov 22, 2015 14:07:29 GMT -5
Congratulations!
Drink all the water, all the time.
Find an OB (or other medical person, midwife, whatever) that you trust, who listens to you, who is willing to actually talk and answer questions during your checkups.
Ask your above mentioned professional any questions you are tempted to google. Don't google.
Be prepared for your delivery, but be aware that things can change in an instant. +1 on writing things down if you need magnesium, +1000 on leaning on your BMB for support for early birth. Or PM me.
If you feel like something is "off" call your OB. Even if it's stupid, CALL YOUR OB.
If you think you will have anxiety or depression issues post-birth, tell your OB now so it's on the table. Tell your partner about your concerns so they can help you. If you need medication, don't feel bad. Your hormones are going to be a rampage for the next 2 years. Don't feel bad if you don't immediately bond with your baby, especially if you had trouble during pregnancy or delivery. This is common.
Post by girlonabike on Nov 22, 2015 22:20:03 GMT -5
Stay active. Even if its just walking, stay active.
Birth is amazing, but its such a tiny sliver of the experience of this whole parenting thing. Don't get hung up on it. Just like you don't want to confuse the wedding for marriage, don't confuse giving birth with being a parent.
You have very little control over the birth process. It's great to have birth OPTIONS. But you can't control the baby's position, when labor starts, how fast your cervix will dilate, whether your amniotic sac will stay intact, your placenta placement, etc. Just keep an open mind. With that said, it's ok to want the birth experience you wanted, and to be sad/angry if that didn't happen.
If you take a birth class with your partner, make sure they PAY ATTENTION. This was one major thing that bugged me when I delivered--it quickly became obvious that my husband didn't pay any attention in our Bradley class and he was useless to me as a coach. He was way too overwhelmed himself to help me out. I'm still kinda bitter about that today. If you can afford a doula, get one.
You do not have to breastfeed. Period. There will be SO MANY PEOPLE telling you HAVE TO BREASTFEED and that if you don't your baby will be allergic to the world, won't thrive, will be stupid, etc. FUCK. THAT. NOISE. It's ok to to breastfeed just because you don't want to, and not just because your boobs don't work. Do what is right for YOU. If you want to breastfeed, awesome! if You want to bottle-feed, awesome! If you want to just pump, awesome! if you want to use formula, awesome! Just keep your kid alive, ok?
Being pregnant is awesome. Except when its not. Enjoy the good times, and its ok to feel bad/sad about the bad times.
Earth Mama Angel Baby makes amazing products for pregnancy and the postnatal period. Check them out.
I don't regret anything I had on my registry. With that said, newborns require very little. A safe place to sleep, diapers, food, & clothes. Your friends/family/coworkers will provide clothes. I had so many that my little guy grew out of them and didn't get to wear them all. Don't feel like you need every little gadget and doo-dad. thing you will need: a car seat, stroller, sleep area (rock n' play is great. also the arm's reach co-sleeper), a swing, a boppy (they make great loungers even if you don't breastfeed), blankets (for swaddling, burping, etc). Everything else is icing.
Postpartum depression is a very real thing. If you think you have it, see your doc ASAP. Don't wait for the 6 week checkup. You do NOT have to feel that way. If you feel overwhelmed, its ok! There is help out there. Educate your partner (if you have one) on the signs so they can help you.
Treasure this time. It goes by so fast. I know it seems like an eternity right now, but seriously. So fast.
Don't get hung up on other people's symptoms/horror stories. I had well-meaning friends and coworkers that kept trying to convince me that pregnancy was SO HARD. My pregnancy was fine. I didn't swell, I didn't have heartburn, My feet didn't turn into boats, I felt fine for the most part, and labor and delivery was fun (once I had the epidural). If I had listened to all those well-meaning people, I would have been miserable. With that being said, sometimes pregnant is very hard! and its ok if you're miserable. No pregnancy is the same as anyone else's (or even your own if you've been pregnant before).
Your life is about to change in a major fucking way. Enjoy the time you have now. Do all the things you've wanted to do. Date your partner. Go out. Travel. This is not to say that once your kiddo is born that everything will be miserable/harder (far from it!), its just...your priorities change.
You will never experience another part of your life in which you will be judged so fucking hard. Fuck them. Turn off the noise. trust your gut. do what is right is for you. screw everyone else.
Post by gingerygirl on Nov 22, 2015 23:05:59 GMT -5
Rainbow mamas, Always remember that this new baby is not a replacement for your angel(s). Nothing can ever replace them and don't let anyone ever tell you that you don't have a reason to be sad anymore. This new baby is going to bring you joy beyond anything you've ever experienced. There will be some days when you "forget" or don't think about your loss and that's okay. Babies take up a lot of your attention. Don't feel bad or guilty. There will be hard days when all you can think about is your angel. Those are the days to snuggle your rainbow the most. So many of us are going through what you are going through and we are here to offer comfort and advice. You are not alone.
Pregnancy and parenthood are not "one size fits all". What people tell you is amazing or terrible may not be that way for you at all. Do what feels right and trust yourself.
You don't have to buy everything in advance. See what you actually need. Keep tags and receipts. Don't wash everything in advance. You'll be doing so much laundry anyway it's easy to throw in a few more things. Amazon prime is amazing. So worth it.
Tums are your friend. Invest in them. I know this has been said a million times, but here's a million and one... Drink all the water. Stms Don't cringe at the amount of TV your kids are watching while you take a nap, or deal with morning sickness. Sometimes you need a break, and that's OK. Boys look fine in hand me down pink. Girls look fine in hand me down blue. You will love this baby just as much as your first baby.
Post by twinkbrite on Nov 23, 2015 15:42:27 GMT -5
There is nothing wrong with formula feeding, but if you decide you want to try and BF at least 6 months, I encourage you to stick with it past the first few weeks. The first 1-3 weeks were the hardest and I wanted to quit so many times. But with the help of LCs and friends with older LOs, I was able to push past the toughest parts and breastfeed at 3 months and counting.
I was also super worried about going back to work and pumping since I am a dance teacher and sometimes teach in four hour blocks with no breaks. I figured out a pumping schedule that works and I wish I hadn't spent so much time stressing over it. It all will workout. Your baby will get fed one way or the other whether you use formula or not.
Post by arimaythea on Nov 26, 2015 10:06:11 GMT -5
My most used baby items for LO's first 4 months:
- Snuggapuppy swing (it plugs in!) - Snuggapuppy Rock n Play - Aden and Anais swaddle blankets - Halo sleep sacks - Cloth diaper prefolds (as burp cloths) - Kick n Play piano - Boppy (not just for nursing- tummy time too!) - Nursing tanks (worn one almost every day since he was born) - Pack n Play with newborn napper - Thin baby washcloths as penis covers for baby boy diaper changes - Yoga ball for calming baby - woven wraps!!! Girasol and Ellevill 100% cotton wraps are so cuddly soft brand new, perfect for babywearing a squish without needing any breaking in. They are love:
Post by lawndog1216 on Nov 26, 2015 22:25:25 GMT -5
If you're breastfeeding, a breastfeeding caddy was the greatest idea I read about ever. I kept a little caddy full of APNO (ask your OB for an RX for it!) and nipple balm (I hated lanolin), granola bars (oats help with supply), dried fruit, chapstick, breast pads, and mini bottles of water. It was easy to scoop up baby and caddy and have everything we needed wherever we went.
Try to be flexible with all the things you "KNOW" you're going to do. The second time around I was much more flexible with plans for everything, and it was much less stressful. I wish I had been that way the first time.
Congratulations and best wishes!! You're pregnant!
Then Comes Family, LLC is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising
program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com.