It's Friday!! CONFESS

[Deleted]

Jan 15, 2016 14:28:58 GMT -5 ♪♫choppinbroccoli♫♪ said:

Jan 15, 2016 13:55:02 GMT -5 requiressnacks said:

When I was in middle school (8th grade), my mom was driving my boyfriend back to his house because, no cars. I sat in the backseat with him and pretended like my mom was our chauffeur. Then I gave him a hand job because I thought it would be funny. I still remember it and I feel like it must have been horrible for him.

Please tell me this was in one of those fucking huge vans and you were in the very back.



I am so weirded out right nooooowwww.

Why is that van missing all the doors?

[♪♫choppinbroccoli♫♪]

Jan 15, 2016 14:30:49 GMT -5 @wallflwr926 said:

Jan 15, 2016 14:28:58 GMT -5 ♪♫choppinbroccoli♫♪ said:

Please tell me this was in one of those fucking huge vans and you were in the very back.



I am so weirded out right nooooowwww.

Why is that van missing all the doors?

QUIT DEFLECTING.

[icaughtfire]

Jan 15, 2016 14:29:53 GMT -5 requiressnacks said:

Jan 15, 2016 14:26:59 GMT -5 icaughtfire said:

How did your mom not realize what the fuck you were doing?

I sometimes wonder if she knew. But it was dark out, so you can't exactly see everything going on. And we lived in the boonies so there weren't any street lights.

She knew. And the thought of my 13 year old kid jacking off another 13 year old kid in my presence skeeves me out.

[amparo1981]

Jan 15, 2016 11:30:41 GMT -5 notagoddess said:

Jan 15, 2016 11:23:06 GMT -5 lilsneezy said:

FFFC: I was selected for jury duty last week and got a call yesterday saying the case I was chosen for is getting continued so they won't need me anymore. I was all "phew!" but I'm actually kind of bummed. I was looking forward to performing my civic duty.

I'm 30 and I have been a citizen for 10 years. I've never been called to jury duty. I know it's a pain in the ass, but I think it would be so interesting, too. I wonder if I've been accidentally left off the list b/c of the naturalization process.

My SO has gotten summoned TWICE in the two years we've been here. He's not American and he won't be in the foreseeable future. No idea what databases they pull names from, because theoretically him telling them he's not a citizen should have taken him off the list permanently.

[Deleted]

Jan 15, 2016 14:31:44 GMT -5 ♪♫choppinbroccoli♫♪ said:

Jan 15, 2016 14:30:49 GMT -5 @wallflwr926 said:

Why is that van missing all the doors?

QUIT DEFLECTING.

How is that deflection? I need answers.

[spicysalmonroll]

ironbaby, That totally happened to me, grew up the last town on the MA border so I didn't realize my 5th grade "boyfriend" lived in CT!

Ok- regarding the escalator situation please tell me someone remembers Mallrats?! He keeps warning of the kid on the escalator and finally the kid gets stuck!

Ok- regarding Rescue 911- I was like 9 when this was on the air so I didn't understand what a dramatization was. I used to say to myself "wow this house is burning down and there just happens to be a person inside filming this?! Get out, get to safety man, why are you filming this?!" haha

And my confession- I've been reading lottery tickets wrong for 30 years and have probably thrown away winners in the past. So I thought the numbers had to match IN ORDER. So like if your ticket said 08-21-54-70 and the numbers called were 21-70-08-54 I thought you lost. So I would only look at my first number and if it didn't match, I'd throw out the ticket!! H literally just told me this weekend that's not how it works. D'OH!

[Deleted]

Jan 15, 2016 14:33:38 GMT -5 spicysalmonroll said:

ironbaby, That totally happened to me, grew up the last town on the MA border so I didn't realize my 5th grade "boyfriend" lived in CT!

Ok- regarding the escalator situation please tell me someone remembers Mallrats?! He keeps warning of the kid on the escalator and finally the kid gets stuck!

Ok- regarding Rescue 911- I was like 9 when this was on the air so I didn't understand what a dramatization was. I used to say to myself "wow this house is burning down and there just happens to be a person inside filming this?! Get out, get to safety man, why are you filming this?!" haha

And my confession- I've been reading lottery tickets wrong for 30 years and have probably thrown away winners in the past. So I thought the numbers had to match IN ORDER. So like if your ticket said 08-21-54-70 and the numbers called were 21-70-08-54 I thought you lost. So I would only look at my first number and if it didn't match, I'd throw out the ticket!! H literally just told me this weekend that's not how it works. D'OH!

hahahahahahahahahaha

[cookswithwine9]

I like the idea of confessing things from our younger years: It was Valentine's Day and my bf (now H; about 10 years ago) and I decided to fool around even though his mom was home. We shut the door but did not lock it. Fast forward to I'm completely naked and we hear a knock at the door. I pull the covers up to my chin right before the door opens. His mom comes in and proceeds to have a conversation with us... She even sits on the bed! All while I am naked underneath. I just told her I was really cold. I still don't know if she knew... Since she is my MIL now and it was so long ago I kind of want to ask... But it's too embarrassing!

[PepperPottsJ]

Jan 15, 2016 14:32:41 GMT -5 @wallflwr926 said:

Jan 15, 2016 14:31:44 GMT -5 ♪♫choppinbroccoli♫♪ said:

QUIT DEFLECTING.

How is that deflection? I need answers.

Wallie, that should be your confession, you deflect like no other...

[cookswithwine9]

Jan 15, 2016 14:33:38 GMT -5 spicysalmonroll said:

ironbaby, That totally happened to me, grew up the last town on the MA border so I didn't realize my 5th grade "boyfriend" lived in CT!

Ok- regarding the escalator situation please tell me someone remembers Mallrats?! He keeps warning of the kid on the escalator and finally the kid gets stuck!

Ok- regarding Rescue 911- I was like 9 when this was on the air so I didn't understand what a dramatization was. I used to say to myself "wow this house is burning down and there just happens to be a person inside filming this?! Get out, get to safety man, why are you filming this?!" haha

And my confession- I've been reading lottery tickets wrong for 30 years and have probably thrown away winners in the past. So I thought the numbers had to match IN ORDER. So like if your ticket said 08-21-54-70 and the numbers called were 21-70-08-54 I thought you lost. So I would only look at my first number and if it didn't match, I'd throw out the ticket!! H literally just told me this weekend that's not how it works. D'OH!

Don't feel bad... I just learned this too...

[spicysalmonroll]

Jan 15, 2016 14:27:24 GMT -5 goldenlove3 said:

If we're confessing things from our younger years... the guy who gave me my first kiss used to live across the street from our church. I would go to church with my family, impatiently make it through mass then meet up with him in a parking lot behind the church to makeout for 15 minutes while my family mingled inside. I'm surprised I never got caught. This only happened a couple times but I only went to church for this reason.

Well since we're bringing this up....when I was 15 I used to walk down the street to babysit 2 kids who were about 7. One day a super hot 22 year old came to the door and turns out it was his mom and half sibling's house. Yea....he came back every Tuesday at 7pm to make out with me after the kids went to bed. It was scandalous. He actually tried to do more but I was a prude and said no. His mom caught on and I was never asked back hahaha

[Deleted]

Jan 15, 2016 14:38:24 GMT -5 PepperPottsJ said:

Jan 15, 2016 14:32:41 GMT -5 @wallflwr926 said:

How is that deflection? I need answers.

Wallie, that should be your confession, you deflect like no other...

How about the weather today? Supposed to be pretty nice out.

[goldenlove3]

Jan 15, 2016 14:39:38 GMT -5 spicysalmonroll said:

Jan 15, 2016 14:27:24 GMT -5 goldenlove3 said:

If we're confessing things from our younger years... the guy who gave me my first kiss used to live across the street from our church. I would go to church with my family, impatiently make it through mass then meet up with him in a parking lot behind the church to makeout for 15 minutes while my family mingled inside. I'm surprised I never got caught. This only happened a couple times but I only went to church for this reason.

Well since we're bringing this up....when I was 15 I used to walk down the street to babysit 2 kids who were about 7. One day a super hot 22 year old came to the door and turns out it was his mom and half sibling's house. Yea....he came back every Tuesday at 7pm to make out with me after the kids went to bed. It was scandalous. He actually tried to do more but I was a prude and said no. His mom caught on and I was never asked back hahaha

My aunt used to lock me and my sister in our basement (it was finished and had all our toys in it anyway) just so she could make out with the boy who lived 2 houses down. I have memories of us stacking tables and chairs to try to look out the small basement window. Totally dangerous! We joke about it with her all the time.

[ironbaby]

It's a long, and not actually funny to anyone but me, story...but I giggle uncontrollably when H says "housecat."

[notagoddess]

Jan 15, 2016 14:32:14 GMT -5 amparo1981 said:

Jan 15, 2016 11:30:41 GMT -5 notagoddess said:

I'm 30 and I have been a citizen for 10 years. I've never been called to jury duty. I know it's a pain in the ass, but I think it would be so interesting, too. I wonder if I've been accidentally left off the list b/c of the naturalization process.

My SO has gotten summoned TWICE in the two years we've been here. He's not American and he won't be in the foreseeable future. No idea what databases they pull names from, because theoretically him telling them he's not a citizen should have taken him off the list permanently.

My grandma keeps getting summoned. She's not American and doesn't speak English, which we keep telling them, but a while passes and they send another notice. That database is not very accurate!

[notagoddess]

Jan 15, 2016 14:32:00 GMT -5 icaughtfire said:

Jan 15, 2016 14:29:53 GMT -5 requiressnacks said:

I sometimes wonder if she knew. But it was dark out, so you can't exactly see everything going on. And we lived in the boonies so there weren't any street lights.

She knew. And the thought of my 13 year old kid jacking off another 13 year old kid in my presence skeeves me out.

When I read this my first thought was that maybe I cannot handle being a parent. Having my theoretical 13-year old kid doing that in my presence makes me rethink parenthood. 

requiressnacks, she totally knew.

[requiressnacks]

Jan 15, 2016 14:38:11 GMT -5 cookswithwine9 said:

I like the idea of confessing things from our younger years: It was Valentine's Day and my bf (now H; about 10 years ago) and I decided to fool around even though his mom was home. We shut the door but did not lock it. Fast forward to I'm completely naked and we hear a knock at the door. I pull the covers up to my chin right before the door opens. His mom comes in and proceeds to have a conversation with us... She even sits on the bed! All while I am naked underneath. I just told her I was really cold. I still don't know if she knew... Since she is my MIL now and it was so long ago I kind of want to ask... But it's too embarrassing!

She had to have known!

[requiressnacks]

Jan 15, 2016 14:39:38 GMT -5 spicysalmonroll said:

Jan 15, 2016 14:27:24 GMT -5 goldenlove3 said:

If we're confessing things from our younger years... the guy who gave me my first kiss used to live across the street from our church. I would go to church with my family, impatiently make it through mass then meet up with him in a parking lot behind the church to makeout for 15 minutes while my family mingled inside. I'm surprised I never got caught. This only happened a couple times but I only went to church for this reason.

Well since we're bringing this up....when I was 15 I used to walk down the street to babysit 2 kids who were about 7. One day a super hot 22 year old came to the door and turns out it was his mom and half sibling's house. Yea....he came back every Tuesday at 7pm to make out with me after the kids went to bed. It was scandalous. He actually tried to do more but I was a prude and said no. His mom caught on and I was never asked back hahaha

He probably would have enjoyed a dry hand job.

[housecarder]

So every New Year our youth group had an overnighter. We went bowling, played games, hung out at the church all night with adult chaperones. We always played a hide and seek type game in the dark and one year the guy I was dating and I hid in the same place and fooled around a lot. Not full on sex, but close.

[Deleted]

Jan 15, 2016 14:45:59 GMT -5 ironbaby said:

It's a long, and not actually funny to anyone but me, story...but I giggle uncontrollably when H says "housecat."

This is your crappiest confession ever. Do better.

[requiressnacks]

Sounds like a lot happens in churches and at church camp! Tell us more....

[lilsneezy]

Jan 15, 2016 14:33:38 GMT -5 spicysalmonroll said:

ironbaby , That totally happened to me, grew up the last town on the MA border so I didn't realize my 5th grade "boyfriend" lived in CT!

Ok- regarding the escalator situation please tell me someone remembers Mallrats?! He keeps warning of the kid on the escalator and finally the kid gets stuck!

Ok- regarding Rescue 911- I was like 9 when this was on the air so I didn't understand what a dramatization was. I used to say to myself "wow this house is burning down and there just happens to be a person inside filming this?! Get out, get to safety man, why are you filming this?!" haha

And my confession- I've been reading lottery tickets wrong for 30 years and have probably thrown away winners in the past. So I thought the numbers had to match IN ORDER. So like if your ticket said 08-21-54-70 and the numbers called were 21-70-08-54 I thought you lost. So I would only look at my first number and if it didn't match, I'd throw out the ticket!! H literally just told me this weekend that's not how it works. D'OH!

Wait… what?

[goldenlove3]

The first time I full on made out with church guy, I didn't know that I needed to swallow (ETA: my own saliva) throughout the process and ended up drooling all over myself.

Also, Juvenile "Back That Thang Up" was playing on repeat the whole time.

[ironbaby]

Jan 15, 2016 14:59:28 GMT -5 @wallflwr926 said:

Jan 15, 2016 14:45:59 GMT -5 ironbaby said:

It's a long, and not actually funny to anyone but me, story...but I giggle uncontrollably when H says "housecat."

This is your crappiest confession ever. Do better.

Where's your confession???

[ironbaby]

Ummm...

I was googling gifs, and this popped up.

ETA: NSFW!!!

SPOILER: Click to show

<poof>

WUT?

[ceejay]

Jan 15, 2016 15:01:41 GMT -5 requiressnacks said:

Sounds like a lot happens in churches and at church camp! Tell us more....

My first kiss happened in a church at a middle school dance.

I have no idea how we managed to sneak in a kiss since I remember they were really strict about not dancing too close during the slow songs...

[requiressnacks]

Jan 15, 2016 15:31:57 GMT -5 ceejay said:

Jan 15, 2016 15:01:41 GMT -5 requiressnacks said:

Sounds like a lot happens in churches and at church camp! Tell us more....

My first kiss happened in a church at a middle school dance.

I have no idea how we managed to sneak in a kiss since I remember they were really strict about not dancing too close during the slow songs...

[WittyLittle]

Jan 15, 2016 11:32:27 GMT -5 teraiin said:

Jan 15, 2016 10:14:56 GMT -5 PepperPottsJ said:

It takes me an extra moment to step onto escalators due to an irrational fear of being injured on an escalator (I did have an incident that was the escalator fault not my being klutzy, so assume that is where it comes from). MH will intentionally turn and face me while we are headed down by he is amused by the anxiety is causes me.

I used to love escalators...

Then when I was little my parents were watching a Rescue 911 episode where a kid was sitting on an escalator and his pants got stuck and it was horrific and traumatizing to me.

I was then scared of escalators and still need to psych myself up to get on/off. Even though rationally I know I'm not sitting on it so the chances of getting hurt are minimal...

That show ruined so much of my childhood. I'm paranoid about toothbrushes getting stuck in the back of my throat... *shivers*

[icaughtfire]

WHO ARE THESE PARENTS THAT ARE OKAY WITH THEIR KIDS DOING SEXUAL STUFF?

Like, I'd like to be open about sex, I want you to come to me with questions/concerns but that doesn't mean you can bang your boyfriend/girlfriend in my house and I'll walk in like "what's up, y'all need condoms?" No.

This might be 5 pages late. I started responding & got busy at work.

[requiressnacks]

For the record, I was never able to have boys in my bedroom or go into their bedroom icaughtfire,

Not sure if that makes you feel any better though. haha