becole, my first appointment is early March - I'll be 7+1 and I was also curious about genetic testing. I think it can be done at 10 weeks. If all goes well, I plan on asking at my first appointment about when/how/cost, etc.
Thanks. Maybe I'll call and ask because if I wind up being 9 weeks at my first appointment, I don't want to miss out. I don't know the difference between the tests or the cost. I didn't know if all OBs offer all the tests or they pick which one they do...
My random for the day... MIL is getting on my last nerve! I texted her yesterday that DD was sick just to let her know because she usually likes to know that stuff. She called me after I texted her and proceeded to quiz me on all of the things I was doing to make sure DD was okay. Everything she asked about I already had thought of or done. She does this all the time and it's so aggravating. I told her I would give her an update today, which I did.
Later this morning GMIL and aunt text to ask me how DD is doing. I know that may sound nice for people to be checking on her but it annoys me because MIL always has to tell other people when DD is sick. Then they text me daily asking how she is progressing. MIL's sister is a nurse so she always calls to get her opinion and it makes me feel like she thinks I'm incompetent and don't know how to take care of my own child. I realize that the solution to this problem is just to stop telling her when DD is sick. /end rant
Post by macaronmama on Feb 16, 2016 14:11:03 GMT -5
Big hugs, lavinia, I dread my own mum may be like this once the little is here. Can your spouse talk to her about it, maybe get her to back off a little bit?
Starting to freak out about my ultrasound on Friday. Once, I know they'll probably be doing more test (boo, I hate needles). But I am also afraid for bad news. I took off the whole day just in case the ultrasound shows an ectopic or no sac, or whatever. I know I'd need a weekend to recover before work. Another part of me is terrified the doctor is going to say its twins. I have no reason to believe we might have twins - like, no indicators of age or family history or IVF, just a gut feeling. Which terrifies me more because every time I joke or have a gut feeling like this, it ends up being true.
Someone talk me down and tell me to get back to work.
My random for the day... MIL is getting on my last nerve! I texted her yesterday that DD was sick just to let her know because she usually likes to know that stuff. She called me after I texted her and proceeded to quiz me on all of the things I was doing to make sure DD was okay. Everything she asked about I already had thought of or done. She does this all the time and it's so aggravating. I told her I would give her an update today, which I did.
Later this morning GMIL and aunt text to ask me how DD is doing. I know that may sound nice for people to be checking on her but it annoys me because MIL always has to tell other people when DD is sick. Then they text me daily asking how she is progressing. MIL's sister is a nurse so she always calls to get her opinion and it makes me feel like she thinks I'm incompetent and don't know how to take care of my own child. I realize that the solution to this problem is just to stop telling her when DD is sick. /end rant
Oh i hear you and understand 100% where you're coming from. My MIL told the whole neighbourhood that we were making her beloved grandson sick... but she's Greek so you kind of expect it... nosy outdated batty old ladies, MILs are...
So far this pregnancy is progressing just as my first did. I just have a serious fear because I am almost 14 years older this time around and am waiting for the payback of an easy first pregnancy and delivery. My first pregnancy was a dream. Afternoon nausea, but never threw up, slight afternoon exhaustion. Then everything was gone by 13ish weeks for the remainder. I had heartburn the last few weeks, but nothing major. Water broke in the late night of my due date, I was in labor 6.5 hours and pushed for 30 minutes.
So once I am cleared off all the IVF restrictions, we are fixing up our home gym and getting active.
Post by lamedianaranja on Feb 16, 2016 14:41:20 GMT -5
macaronmama good luck at the ultrasound! I think that it's just the nature of the testing that makes everyone so nervous. Like I always have an irrational fear of twins. I think it's the fact that you can't see what's going on in there until you get the US
I'm getting my hair highlighted and attempting to ignore my gas/nausea/heartburn trifecta. I can't seem to sleep at night (nerves I think), so the fatigue is rough.
Luckily my boss knows and is very understanding, and I'm managing to be productive regardless.
I feel bad that my group is making plans for work we have in the pipeline and assigning me things I know I won't be around for. I also have pgal brain and a big fear of having to "take it back" if I did announce.
Lastly, my direct manager has been struggling with IF and has also had a loss and some failed IUI/IVFs. I'm really dreading telling her I'm pregnant.
It is the worst @holachica! With DD I called the insurance and asked if it was covered and they said yes so I did it. Then we got a $700 bill. I called again and they said it wasn't covered. Luckily they record their phone calls and could listen to the person originally telling me it was covered. So I did not have to pay. But seriously your own insurance people can't even figure out what's covered? How are we supposed to be able to figure it out??
jcrewgirl, becole, the NIPT test (a simple blood test) can be done starting at around 9 weeks. It doesn't always come back with a conclusive result (I had two inconclusive results during my last pregnancy due to lack of fetal blood detected and I had to wait two weeks each time for a result). But it's the simplest non-invasive testing. It also doesn't test everything, but it does test for Trisomy 13, 18 and 21. I'm not sure of your age, but it's standard now for anyone over 35. For others, often insurance won't pay so you'd have to pay out of pocket.
As for me, I have no symptoms right now which I'd be worried about except that I just got my third beta in and it's a great number. I have to go in again on Thursday, then I have an ultrasound and meeting with my reproductive endocrinologist next Friday. I'll be six weeks. Every day feels like an eternity.
I feel bad that my group is making plans for work we have in the pipeline and assigning me things I know I won't be around for. I also have pgal brain and a big fear of having to "take it back" if I did announce.
Lastly, my direct manager has been struggling with IF and has also had a loss and some failed IUI/IVFs. I'm really dreading telling her I'm pregnant.
I have not told my work yet, but I am in a department of two people so I feel bad knowing I will be out and we are planning projects for down the road. I am going to wait until 12 weeks at least to tell work. That's what I did last time, and it worked well. Enough time for them to plan, but enough time for me to feel confident about the pregnancy.
ellabee, I wouldn't worry about everyone at work just yet. They will be able to manage it when you do decide to tell them. I totally get PGAL brain and protecting what's right for you is the most important thing at the moment.
As for your manager, I hope you don't think I'm overstepping here, but speaking as a fellow infertile that had a very hard time getting pregnant, it will probably be hard for her. I'm sure she'll be happy for you, but other peoples pregnancies do bring up how hard it is for us to get pregnant and a little bit of healthy jealousy comes up...it's not that we aren't happy for other people, just that we are sad for ourselves.
I've had my "fertile" friends tell me in ways that were pretty insensitive (a Facebook post a week after my second loss after she promised me she'd tell me in person when she got pregnant) and in ways that were really great. The best was a friend who pulled me aside and told me away from others and let me know that she knew it might be hard for me to hear, and she'd understand if I were sad or angry. It made me that much happier for her. Then she left me alone and I cried for a little bit. But more importantly, she also never brought up her pregnancy around me like so many others did over and over and over. Instead, she let me bring it up to her so that I could let her know that I was OK talking about it. Sometimes it's not the initial telling the person and more about how they are after that can hurt or help most.
Ok, so that's my unsolicited advice. Sorry if I overstepped.
Is there a Quest lab near you? They are often cheaper than going through an OB/hospital lab. And for what it's worth, I got "no result" twice with the Panorama which made me wait two weeks both times. MaterniT21 is the one that worked for me and it took five days instead of ten.
murrt - not overstepping at all! That's extremely helpful advice and perspective. I have a SIL that is also dealing with IF and I've been wondering about the best way to break the news to her (once I'm a bit more confident we've got a sticky baby).
My mil is okay most of the time, but so annoying. I feel you!
And I'm always worried about twins WittyLittle because my H is a twin.
According to Babycenter, the father's family history of twins has no bearing on your possibility of having fraternal twins, which does make sense because he has nothing to do with you releasing two eggs.
This was in my weekly email this week:
Surprising facts: Could it be twins?
Sure, twins run in families and you're more likely to be carrying multiples if you've undergone fertility treatments, but any woman can become pregnant with more than one baby. Could you be one of them?
Your odds of carrying twins
Overall, about one in 31 births (greater than 3 percent) are twin births. But your chances of having twins are much less — 1 in 89 — if you conceive without medical assistance. The overall odds of bearing triplets or higher-order multiples is about 1 in 565. Identical twins usually happen by chance. Your likelihood of having identical, or monozygotic, twins (when one fertilized egg divides in half) is about 1 in 250. A number of factors affect your odds of having fraternal twins or higher-order multiples. Fertility treatments dramatically increase your odds. On average, 20 to 25 percent of women who take fertility drugs or undergo in vitro fertilization or other assisted reproductive techniques end up carrying more than one baby.
Other factors that influence the likelihood of having fraternal twins
Once you have a set of fraternal twins, you're twice as likely to have another set in a future pregnancy. Fraternal twins run in families, so if you're a twin or related to twins, you're more likely to have a set yourself. Your partner's family history doesn't appear to affect your odds of having twins. The older you are, the greater your chances of having naturally occurring fraternal twins or higher-order multiples. Hormonal changes in older women are a likely cause. Fraternal twins are more common than average in African Americans and less common in Hispanics and Asians. The more pregnancies you've had, the greater your chances of having twins. Twins are more common in large and tall women than in small women.
I've heard that fact about twins not going through the male but according to my Ob gyn- it can pass through either parent and it doesn't have to skip generations. I actually know of a family with twin girls and a son. The son has twins and one of the twin girls has twins. But she said we have about 2x the risk of twins which still only makes it 4%. - paraphrasing from my OB.
Thanks for the info about the testing. I'm not ama but would like as much info. I would pay $200 OOP but I would not pay $800. I need to get a quote...
Thanks for the info about the testing. I'm not ama but would like as much info. I would pay $200 OOP but I would not pay $800. I need to get a quote...
becole - I just called my insurance - not covered because I'm not AMA and there are obviously no markings for any trisomy at this time.
With that being said, my insurance was able to see that my OB has a contract for the MaterniT21 where I get 35% off of that rate. Whatever that # is (because I have coinsurance instead of a deductible), I would only pay 10% of that #. So let's just say it cost $700. 35% of $700 is $245, subtract that and the # is $455. So through my coinsurance, the cost would be $45.50.
becole , is your husband a fraternal twin? I ask because yes, I've heard the same thing that it doesn't matter if it's on the male or female side when it comes to increased possibility for fraternal twins.
jcrewgirl that's absolutely worth it for the test!
If they charged me a thousand dollars I'd still do the NIPT without question. But, I am kind of a horror story when it comes to that stuff.
{LOSS and TRIGGER warning } You do not have to have a trisomy marker for you to have a baby with a trisomy and you do not have to be AMA. Actually, most babies with trisomy are born to women under 35 because they don't have the NIPT testing.
I had a half of one percent chance of my baby having the condition it did. My baby had no markers on the NT scan or on any of the many ultrasounds I had. But the NIPT test came back positive and an amnio then confirmed the condition.
murrt explained exactly why I want to do the testing, no matter what. I'm pretty positive that my insurance will cover at least part of it and if they don't, they'll negotiate it down to something manageable.
becole, yup! Then it's definitely increased risk (or blessing?) for you. I was worried about it when I was first trying to conceive because my Dad is a twin, but he's identical so it doesn't put me at any increased risk.
murrt explained exactly why I want to do the testing, no matter what. I'm pretty positive that my insurance will cover at least part of it and if they don't, they'll negotiate it down to something manageable.
Thanks lady. I never want to talk about loss in a happy place like a BMB, but if it might help someone....
Post by macaronmama on Feb 16, 2016 16:31:55 GMT -5
Haha, thanks jwinct and the other ladies, I got my mind back on track and to work. Since I got in a little early, I have no problems leaving a little earlier today as well. Hopefully I can get home before my evening fatigue kicks in.
ellabee I plan on telling my supervisor at 12 weeks, unless I'm showing before or have some really bad symptoms I need to deal with. The only issue I really foresee is that we'll have a new boss in between him and us who will be hired just before I'm gone for awhile so there will be a lot of filling in needed.
Post by iwantbacon on Feb 16, 2016 19:42:11 GMT -5
If im not yet AMA, but will be before delivery, do they consider me AMA for the whole pregnancy? Or am I a young spring chicken until after my birthday? If they'll cover testing now, they can call me an old lady all they want.
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