Worst Wedding Stories

[lilsneezy]

I had a small destination wedding (about 25 people) and one of my bridesmaids had my other bridesmaid go around and ask pretty much every guy, single or not, if they would have sex with her. She was literally going around saying "Missy wants to know if you'd fuck her" to my closest friends and family. I had my BILs and other guests coming up to me asking me what her deal was and why I even had her in my wedding. I was so embarrassed and disappointed that not only one, but two bridesmaids, thought this would be a good idea. I haven't really talked to the slutty bridesmaid since.

[jubilantsquirrel]

Feb 17, 2016 17:45:42 GMT -5 pippacricket said:

Feb 17, 2016 12:01:54 GMT -5 jubilantsquirrel said:

mustloveerica , your cousin in a bitch. I get the frustration though. I had 14 guests no-show. FOURTEEN! Out of like, 110. One of them was my mom's friend. She RSVP'd with a plus one and then didn't show up. When my mom asked her what happened after the wedding she said that the weather was too nice so her and her SO decided to go sailing instead.

WHAT?!?!?!

That was my reaction as well. Apparently she also told my mom that since I picked a holiday weekend I really shouldn't be surprised that some people didn't show up. I got married on July 2nd, the 4th of July was on a Monday that year, so it was a long weekend. But I also had a year and half long engagement, with save the dates being sent out a year in advance and the invitations being sent out 4 months in advance. It's not like it was spur of the moment or anything.

Her daughter also no-showed. But for a different reason that I can *kind of* understand.

[ameliabird]

**Siggy warning**

I want to play!

I can sympathize with people no-showing. We had a small to medium wedding with about 100 people in attendance. My cousin rsvp'd for her family of 5 and another cousin rsvp'd for her family of 6 and both families no showed. That's a lot of money wasted on a plated dinner.

Another cousin (brother to the cousin with the family of 6) was going through marital issues with his wife but they were still working on things and I really like her so I invited her to come. During our first dance she started crying and took off to the bathroom. Everyone was worried about her and my sister/MOH went to make sure she was ok. It was interesting.

[teraiin]

I was MOH a couple summers ago and it was horrible. Among the many things that happened, the bride forgot the rings and realized about 3 minutes before the service started. So she sent the husband of one of her bridesmaids to the house she was renting (it was a 'destination' wedding) to find them. He got lost trying to find the house and then the rings weren't where she said they were.

Wedding started 45 minutes late. She was pissed at him for getting lost. Hello, he showed up that morning and hadn't even been to the house...

After the service she decided spur of the moment she wanted 'scenic' photos and decided she wanted to go to *insert scenic overlook mountain* and get pictures on the ski lift. So we drove there where she threw a temper tantrum because

1. there were like 34608346 people in line and the company refused to bump them

and

2. They made us each pay separate and she hoped they'd...I don't know get overcome with the romance of it all.

We were an hour late for the reception. It was a 90 degree humid day, in an not air conditioned venue. At dinner time. Where the guests had to stare at the food but not eat.

[Hooper88]

I can't think of any good story but I do have to say how fun it was to read all these crazy stories!

[icedtea]

I have no words to describe my face as I read about the butt plug at the bridal shower. Damn.

My cousin and his girlfriend didn't show because he didn't want to get up (he would have had to wake up around 8am). That seems less annoying now that I've read these stories.

I once went to a wedding that we drive 10+ hours for, each way. When we got home there was already a preprinted, generic thank you card waiting for us. Yup.

[thechickencoop]

Feb 17, 2016 12:10:31 GMT -5 rablissful said:

In August I went to a "bring your own chair" wedding ceremony. We stood.

My SO still randomly mutters "bring your own chair" when frustrated with random shit.

OMG WHAT???!!! These stories are making me ragey but I have never in my life heard of a bring your own chair event. And that's fucking hilarious that your H uses that line now.

[thechickencoop]

We were at a wedding last year where this guy pulled his dick out on the dance floor then threw up on the shuttle on the way back to the hotels.

Years ago I was bar hopping with bachelorette party; we were at a particularly raunchy club and one of the other bridesmaids got punched in the freakin face by a guy! I didn't see it but was pulled along in the flood of bachelorette party attendees leaving like...wtf? They had the limo drive them to the hospital; one other bridesmaid and myself (out of...like...10) just had the limo take us home while the rest all went in the ER. Neither of us were happy about attending, let alone all the stupid drama.

I got married during a tropical storm...it actually ended up being beautiful

[ohinvrtedworld]

Feb 17, 2016 21:08:18 GMT -5 millimeter314 said:

We had a Catholic wedding. DH's friend/groomsman asked our wedding planner why our church promoted pornography since there were half-naked status of Jesus everywhere.

He then called all my friends names and treated them like shit when they wouldn't dance with him. He called my brother gay to his face and to anyone else who would listen because he was in the Navy and spent months at a time on a sub with 30 other men. After the wedding, my brother drove me to my mom's house since this groomsman rode over in the limo and didn't have a way back to his car. DH had to take him.

The guy was a dick and refused to apologize since these were "his opinions."

Please, please tell me YH no longer is friends with someone like this. Omg.

[kleigh]

These are the best and I don't ever want his thread to die!

So here's one where maybe I am a tad at fault. I was co-MOH in my sisters wedding (D) with another sister (P). Another sister (K) was BM with two of D's friends (J and V).

As background, D and I have a great relationship (she's a year older than me) but there's always been a streak of competitiveness, and when it came to the weddings she made no exception to that constantly trying to beat me to the punch, outdo, & one up. (Our engagements and weddings were a month and two months apart). She is also a complete control freak and has a very short patience/fuse.

So PART ONE was a few hours before the rehearsal dinner. D's friend and bridesmaid (J) convinced P and me to get an airbrush tan with her. Me and P had never done it and in retrospect probably shouldn't have tried it the day before D's wedding. But it was early October and there was zero summer tan left on our Irish/Hungarian pale skin. We told the guy to use the darkest level, but even that didn't look very dark on the sample he showed. Well as the tan began to develop thoughout the night it went from cute sun kissed to darker and darker and darker. By morning the three of us looked like Robert Downey Jr in Tropic Thunder (google it seriously). D was PISSED (and rightfully so) and all the scrubbing wouldn't take it off.

PART DEUX.. The kicker. There was a 4 hr break between ceremony and reception. The SOs were all at a bar and sending us pics of shots, beers, getting loose and having fun while we stood around outside waiting for D and H to finish their photos so we could all do the group shots. Dry limos bc D is control freak and didn't want buzzed/drunk bridal party. Well one of my little brothers smuggled red wine into the limo in a backpack !!! Lots of it!! (I taught the young one well). But no cork screw. The limo driver finagled it open with a Swiss Army knife spilling some of it on several of us. The dresses were black but guys shirts were white obv. Screw it! We proceeded to pass around the bottles. Just then they call us for group shots.

The look of horror on D's face was priceless... I felt bad actually, I really did .. but if she just let us bring vodka. Apparently none of us considered that the red wine would stain our teeth !!!

TLDR: I screwed up and my sisters wedding pics are forever ruined by three dark tan bridesmaids and red wine stained teeth/shirts.

[youdontsay]

OH I have to play.

1) at my bridal shower my MIL called me fat. She was talking to one of my BMs and goes "youdontsay and my son have a lot in common, they're both husky". I told MH, he calls his mother and she tells me I'm a liar. MH believed her. She ruined my shower.

2) MIL shows me this gorgeous dress that she's going to wear for the wedding. I mean, it was a nice dress. The day of the wedding she ends up wearing a dress that looks like a nightgown and made in the same material as a tshirt. Then she proceeds to change into jeans and a tshirt after the mother/son dance.

3) every fucking picture of my MIL had her cell phone in her hand.

4) my one BM walked into the bridal suite smelling of pot. My mom goes "why do you smell like a skunk?" Needless to say she was useless the whole night and ended up having sex with her bf (MH's BM) in the bridal suite.

5) my own aunt and uncle were no snows. When my mom called to find out why, my aunt said it might have snowed so they wanted to stay home....

[TrickyJedi]

Hey ladies, saw this thread and had to contribute. My cousin married a "lovely lady" last year, we'll call her Bitch Bride. Here is a brief rundown on the shenanigans before the wedding:
-On her 3rd wedding venue. 1st cancelled their contract because they didn't want to deal with her, 2nd turned out to be more the they could afford, and the 3rd one is apparently the charm.

-She sent various family members letters wanting to know how much money they were going to contribute to the wedding. Obviously they didn't get what they expected, hence losing the 2nd venue.

- Family members that did not contribute were uninvited.

- Has gone from 9 bridesmaids to 4 due to them quitting on her.

- Demoted her MOH, my cousin, because she couldn't throw her the bachelorette party she "deserved". Homegirl wanted it thrown in NYC. My cousin lives in San Diego and is struggling to make ends meet while supporting 2 little ones.

- Numerous FB posts bitching out people that didn't RSVP, (weeks before the RSVP date), airing all of her fights with the groom (my cousin), and just general bitching about how "stressful" wedding planning is. Most of these posts are undecipherable.

The day of the wedding she was pissed off the whole time, wouldn't talk to anyone, the theme for the "Wedding of the Year" was fishing and decorations consisting of lots of crayon colored construction paper fish and poor live betas. (We rescued some). Bitch Bride went through the cards during the wedding to see how much people gave. During the family photo of the groom's, my cousin, side of the family she wanted to know "What the fuck is taking so long?" about my great aunt in her wheelchair getting there.

A few weeks after the wedding we got the "Thank You" card, it was a postcard with their wedding picture that just had "Thank You" printed on it. Some shit went down after the wedding and we no longer talk. She did just send my Mom and email saying that I need to be nice to her. Yeah, sure, I'm right ton top of that Rose.

[hydrangea1019]

Oooooooo I totally forgot!! I have something to contribute

I was a bridesmaid in my friend's wedding, and the wedding went off without a hitch for the most part. Two of the other bridesmaids were annoying, but whatevs.

We get to the reception, everything is fine. Then the drinks start flowing! One of the annoying bridesmaids is taking the bride's 13 year old cousin and giving her drinks, so 13 year old pretty much ends up tipsy before her parents realized what was happening.

One of our mutual friends brought her ex-boyfriend as her +1. They were trying to work things out. She gets SHWASTED! By the end of the night she's screaming that someone stole her credit cards out of her wallet. It was actually quite hilarious at the time. (In the end, they were in her wallet the whole time)

We get back to the hotel where we are all staying and we order pizza bc we are starving and drunk. However we can't find credit card friend. Turns out she slipped away from her date, hooked up with a groomsman who was engaged at the time but his fiancé wasn't in attendance. In the act of, she couldn't get her dress off so she ripped it in two. Once they were done she passed out on the couch in the room and he couldn't get her to leave.

Meanwhile, her date looks horribly embarrassed that she's disappeared and probably knows what she's doing. DH and I felt so bad we just hung out with him all night and gave him our pizza.

Back to the annoying bridesmaids, one of them ended up being diagnosed with swine flu the following week. We were all worried she's infected us all!

[pivot]

*poof*