Youuu Ohhh (Unpopular Opinions, That Is)

[katespade]

I'm worried about the lack of a nursery, if I'm totally honest. I know it'll be fine, but it scares me only because I have no idea what kind of shape I'm going to be in.

[cinnamonsmiles]

Feb 18, 2016 15:33:51 GMT -5 katespade said:

Feb 18, 2016 15:27:51 GMT -5 @ismellbooks said:

Ugh, yes. This too.

He made some pact with some childhood friend (who he's not even friends with anymore) that they'd both grow up and spend way too much money on pugs, to name them Meatball and Hoagie. Said former friend has Hoagie. Now we "have to" get Meatball. But he can't be a rescue pug. He needs to be a papered, puppy pug. Why. Just why.

He loves corgis.  He wants a puppy corgi.

Meanwhile I nearly cried my eyes out of my head over a stray cat in the neighborhood.  I'm so sensitive about saving all of the animals.  Plus, if I am going to have a dog I want one that is a scruffy and scraggly and scrappy little mutt of a thing.

But corgis are SO CUTE. And they have the best personalities ever - a big dog in a little body.
We have a pedigree but nonpapered one (long story) and he's the best!

DH and I ran into someone who paid big bucks for a "papered corgi" and had to break it to them that she was definitely mixed (ain't no corgis with corkscrew tails)...so papers really do only count for so much

[blackbird]

Feb 18, 2016 15:33:51 GMT -5 katespade said:

Feb 18, 2016 15:27:51 GMT -5 @ismellbooks said:

Ugh, yes. This too.

He made some pact with some childhood friend (who he's not even friends with anymore) that they'd both grow up and spend way too much money on pugs, to name them Meatball and Hoagie. Said former friend has Hoagie. Now we "have to" get Meatball. But he can't be a rescue pug. He needs to be a papered, puppy pug. Why. Just why.

He loves corgis.  He wants a puppy corgi.

Meanwhile I nearly cried my eyes out of my head over a stray cat in the neighborhood.  I'm so sensitive about saving all of the animals.  Plus, if I am going to have a dog I want one that is a scruffy and scraggly and scrappy little mutt of a thing.

H delivers a pallet of dog food donated from the company he works for every week to an animal shelter about a hour away. (he's the director of feed sales)

Our standard and mini aussies are actually both rescues/rehomes. The standard was a stray that showed up at a friend's house, and the mini came from a breeder that decided she had too many males so I actually have his papers. H has already said our next dog (which won't be anytime soon...3 is plenty) will come from that shelter. He sees so many good dogs in there every week; he has come real close to bringing a few home.

He's stronger than me; I would've brought one home by now lol

[katespade]

Feb 18, 2016 15:53:14 GMT -5 @ismellbooks said:

Feb 18, 2016 15:46:44 GMT -5 katespade said:

I'm worried about the lack of a nursery, if I'm totally honest. I know it'll be fine, but it scares me only because I have no idea what kind of shape I'm going to be in.

This makes me curious to know where you're planning to deliver. I thought all of the big ones around here still had nurseries. Mine defaults to rooming-in, but does still offer the nursery should moms want / need it.

My OB is out of GW, so the plan is to go there.

Inova's new women's center has a nursery as far as I know- we're doing the tour there next weekend as an emergency backup in case things go haywire and I need to be at the hospital ASAP.

[katespade]

Feb 18, 2016 16:15:18 GMT -5 @ismellbooks said:

Feb 18, 2016 15:55:51 GMT -5 katespade said:

My OB is out of GW, so the plan is to go there.

Inova's new women's center has a nursery as far as I know- we're doing the tour there next weekend as an emergency backup in case things go haywire and I need to be at the hospital ASAP.

Ah yeah. I'll be at Fair Oaks, and I know they do still have a nursery, so I'd imagine the new one does too. Kind of surprises me that GW has done away with the nursery. Huh.

Yup. No binkies either.

[rachelilly23]

Feb 18, 2016 16:15:18 GMT -5 @ismellbooks said:

Feb 18, 2016 15:55:51 GMT -5 katespade said:

My OB is out of GW, so the plan is to go there.

Inova's new women's center has a nursery as far as I know- we're doing the tour there next weekend as an emergency backup in case things go haywire and I need to be at the hospital ASAP.

Ah yeah. I'll be at Fair Oaks, and I know they do still have a nursery, so I'd imagine the new one does too. Kind of surprises me that GW has done away with the nursery. Huh.

You are in noVa? We lived in Fairfax from July 2010-March 2012. Wish we still lived there.

[SheilaTheTank]

Feb 18, 2016 16:27:20 GMT -5 TheCoffeeNinja said:

UO, brought on by something I saw on FB: I have no issue with kids dressing up as characters of the opposite sex. I don't care whether my kids want to dress as a princess, a pirate or a dinosaur as long as they're happy.

.......

Didn't know people actually gave fucks about this. 

On second thought, it's FB so people will find anything to complain about. 

[adorebel]

Feb 18, 2016 15:33:51 GMT -5 katespade said:

Feb 18, 2016 15:27:51 GMT -5 @ismellbooks said:

Ugh, yes. This too.

He made some pact with some childhood friend (who he's not even friends with anymore) that they'd both grow up and spend way too much money on pugs, to name them Meatball and Hoagie. Said former friend has Hoagie. Now we "have to" get Meatball. But he can't be a rescue pug. He needs to be a papered, puppy pug. Why. Just why.

He loves corgis.  He wants a puppy corgi.

Meanwhile I nearly cried my eyes out of my head over a stray cat in the neighborhood.  I'm so sensitive about saving all of the animals.  Plus, if I am going to have a dog I want one that is a scruffy and scraggly and scrappy little mutt of a thing.

We (my parents) have 2 rescue corgis! One is a show dog that "didn't walk right" and one was found on the streets of Detroit and in a shelter. They were both about a year old, so not puppies, but still young.

[rachelilly23]

Feb 18, 2016 16:29:28 GMT -5 @ismellbooks said:

Feb 18, 2016 16:27:23 GMT -5 rachelilly23 said:

You are in noVa? We lived in Fairfax from July 2010-March 2012. Wish we still lived there.

Yess, I love Fairfax. Don't love how much it costs to live here. But love living here.

Traffic too. Don't miss that part. But H and I would like to end up in that area whenever he's done with the Navy. Or even if there are open billets for the pentagon, we would go back in a heartbeat.

[SheilaTheTank]

I'm a little confused about the whole nursery thing. Aren't most of you planning on having your LOs sleep in the same room as you when you get home? Isn't that the same thing as rooming in?

[SheilaTheTank]

No to a dog. I have bunny who destroys my house and furniture. I don't need a dog to do that as well.

[rachelilly23]

Feb 18, 2016 16:34:32 GMT -5 @ismellbooks said:

Feb 18, 2016 16:32:01 GMT -5 rachelilly23 said:

Traffic too. Don't miss that part. But H and I would like to end up in that area whenever he's done with the Navy. Or even if there are open billets for the pentagon, we would go back in a heartbeat.

It's so bad, I've been here long enough now that the traffic doesn't even phase me. Probably helps that I have a reverse commute: west in the morning, east in the evening, so I'd probably feel differently if I had to go from FFX to the district every day. There's just so much opportunity, and so much cool stuff, and so many great schools here.

I used to work in Falls Church and the commute was an hour. Even in non peak times. I was a contractor and worked 10-3 and it still took an hour to get there and back... insane.

[blackbird]

All this urban/city talk is giving me the twitches. I can't with all the people, concrete, noise, etc. I've lived in both the big cities in OK (nothing compared to what most of you are used to), and I could never go back to that.

UO: Give me all the wide open spaces/country life any day.

[Deleted]

Feb 18, 2016 16:27:20 GMT -5 TheCoffeeNinja said:

UO, brought on by something I saw on FB: I have no issue with kids dressing up as characters of the opposite sex. I don't care whether my kids want to dress as a princess, a pirate or a dinosaur as long as they're happy.

I hope this isn't truly unpopular.

[katespade]

Feb 18, 2016 16:32:11 GMT -5 SheilaTheTank said:

I'm a little confused about the whole nursery thing. Aren't most of you planning on having your LOs sleep in the same room as you when you get home? Isn't that the same thing as rooming in?

Basically I will be at the hospital alone for a portion of my stay, which is fine with me. But I'm worried about being there alone and potentially on pain meds- I worry about being with it enough to not drop the baby or something.

It may very well play out to be totally fine. But it's definitely just a worry because it sounds like the nursery-less baby friendly hospitals sort of leave you to it in terms of managing your baby and yourself despite the fact that you just went through a major medical situation and may need more attentive care.

[nexttonormal]

Feb 18, 2016 16:59:08 GMT -5 @pugsandwine said:

Feb 18, 2016 16:27:20 GMT -5 TheCoffeeNinja said:

UO, brought on by something I saw on FB: I have no issue with kids dressing up as characters of the opposite sex. I don't care whether my kids want to dress as a princess, a pirate or a dinosaur as long as they're happy.

I hope this isn't truly unpopular.

I don't think it's an UO with people having kids now, at least not the people I know.
I do think our parents generation may still have reservations about it, or some may even make comments if a boy chooses to wear a tiara or a girl chooses a ninja turtle outfit. My MIL being one of those lovely outspoken individuals.

[katespade]

The traffic here doesn't bother me. Mostly it's the lack of signaling and the reckless nature of drivers here.

[Deleted]

Feb 18, 2016 16:32:11 GMT -5 SheilaTheTank said:

I'm a little confused about the whole nursery thing. Aren't most of you planning on having your LOs sleep in the same room as you when you get home? Isn't that the same thing as rooming in?

My thoughts are: If for some reason my labor was super intense or traumatic on my body, I'm in a ton of pain, I haven't slept for two days, nurses are coming and going, and/or I just generally feel like I've been crushed by a ton of bricks - I want to be able to take a reprieve and try to sleep/rest for an hour or two... I feel like I should be allowed to do that. I won't want to send baby away for a night or even more than a little bit of time (I don't know why two hours is in my head, who *actually* knows...), but if I need to take a shower and a catnap to save my sanity and/or give myself a chance to just calm the eff down, I want that opportunity.

I hope that makes sense?

[nexttonormal]

Feb 18, 2016 17:04:18 GMT -5 @pugsandwine said:

Feb 18, 2016 16:32:11 GMT -5 SheilaTheTank said:

I'm a little confused about the whole nursery thing. Aren't most of you planning on having your LOs sleep in the same room as you when you get home? Isn't that the same thing as rooming in?

My thoughts are: If for some reason my labor was super intense or traumatic on my body, I'm in a ton of pain, I haven't slept for two days, nurses are coming and going, and/or I just generally feel like I've been crushed by a ton of bricks - I want to be able to take a reprieve and try to sleep/rest for an hour or two... I feel like I should be allowed to do that. I won't want to send baby away for a night or even more than a little bit of time (I don't know why two hours is in my head, who *actually* knows...), but if I need to take a shower and a catnap to save my sanity and/or give myself a chance to just calm the eff down, I want that opportunity.

I hope that makes sense?

For me, the nursery was a godsend with DD2. The nurses would bring her in every 2 hours or so overnight so I could nurse her, then I'd ring the bell and they'd take her back to the nursery until she woke up again. It was amazing.

With DD1, I felt like I needed to have her in the room with me (more due to guilt that I'd be looked at by others as incompetent) and holy effing shit... Let me tell you that no matter how you get that baby out, you NEED time alone to just sleep. Even if it's interrupted every hour to nurse, I promise you it's better than feeling like you *have* to keep the baby in the room with you.
An overtired, exhausted, hormonal, and sore mama is only amplified when you're forced to be the sole caregiver of it from the very beginning.
It really does take a village and that's OK if you need help/a break.

Sorry.. got off on a little rant there. I guess I attribute my PPA/PPD with DD1 to our hospital stay and my inability to ask for help from the get go.

[ironmom]

Feb 18, 2016 15:43:06 GMT -5 katespade said:

Feb 18, 2016 15:40:57 GMT -5 @pugsandwine said:

In big city areas, there are often rescue groups focused on a specific breed - have you tried looking into that? They often rescue the dogs from puppy mills and bad breeding situations and then they get a chance at a wonderful life!

There are a number of corgi rescues across the country, but none in our area.  I check every so often, though, because I am an awesome wife.

We almost adopted a corgi that popped up in a shelter here a few years back- I was volunteering at the shelter (which is a bad, bad idea for me because then I want all of the friends) and out pops this giant corgi face. 

Sometimes the rescues will transfer to local shelters. That's how we got our husky.

[adorebel]

Feb 18, 2016 16:32:34 GMT -5 @ismellbooks said:

Feb 18, 2016 16:27:20 GMT -5 TheCoffeeNinja said:

UO, brought on by something I saw on FB: I have no issue with kids dressing up as characters of the opposite sex. I don't care whether my kids want to dress as a princess, a pirate or a dinosaur as long as they're happy.

+1

I've said for years that I couldn't wait to dress my girl babies in blue / my boy babies in pink, just to confuse and irritate people. DS already has two onesies that I know will make my super masculine FIL twitch: "This is what a feminist looks like." and one that's hot pink and reads, "On Wednesdays we wear pink." Now, of course, he also has suspenders and bow ties and pants with knee patches. I just hate it when people try to assign certain and specific roles to CHILDREN, and refuse to cross any line that might portray something different.

MMKAY I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT THESE ONESIES.

Which feminist one did you get? I was debating between "this is what a feminist looks like" and "princess feminist in training." 

I'm also in love with this quote for a onesie (they discontinued the one I wanted, but this is similar) - maybe you are too, as a book nerd:
www.etsy.com/listing/240264340/custom-shakespeare-though-she-be-but?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=though%20she%20be%20but%20little%20she%20is%20fierce%20onesie&ref=sr_gallery_35

[rosetyler72]

Feb 18, 2016 14:15:10 GMT -5 @pugsandwine said:

Ima let you all finish, but pugs are the greatest dogs of ALL TIME.

BOOM. Linking two UO topics into one AND dropping the mic.

*sashays*

Pugs are great, but I kind of feel like they are a big dog at heart that just got shrunk down. Plus, they aren't yappy. That is what I can't stand about a lot of tiny dogs. 

ETA: I am team ALL the dogs, I just happen to love big breeds more. 

[rosetyler72]

Feb 18, 2016 16:27:20 GMT -5 TheCoffeeNinja said:

UO, brought on by something I saw on FB: I have no issue with kids dressing up as characters of the opposite sex. I don't care whether my kids want to dress as a princess, a pirate or a dinosaur as long as they're happy.

On a related note but maybe not an UO- I don't understand why people get so irritated when someone guesses/uses the wrong gender pronoun when talking about their infant or toddler. They are typically mentioning something nice about your baby, who cares that they said "she" when your baby is a boy? 

[ironmom]

Feb 18, 2016 18:55:30 GMT -5 rosetyler72 said:

Feb 18, 2016 16:27:20 GMT -5 TheCoffeeNinja said:

UO, brought on by something I saw on FB: I have no issue with kids dressing up as characters of the opposite sex. I don't care whether my kids want to dress as a princess, a pirate or a dinosaur as long as they're happy.

On a related note but maybe not an UO- I don't understand why people get so irritated when someone guesses/uses the wrong gender pronoun when talking about their infant or toddler. They are typically mentioning something nice about your baby, who cares that they said "she" when your baby is a boy? 

YES. Just correct them, if you feel the need, and move on. People still think my son is a girl half the time. He's three now, and self-identifies male, and is usually wearing something Captain America related, but he has very soft features. Sometimes he corrects them, but usually he doesn't even give a fuck. He's just happy they called him cute.

[arbe]

Feb 18, 2016 16:32:11 GMT -5 SheilaTheTank said:

I'm a little confused about the whole nursery thing. Aren't most of you planning on having your LOs sleep in the same room as you when you get home? Isn't that the same thing as rooming in?

I'm with you, and don't forget nurses are only a call bell away. It's not like they leave you high and dry, someone is checking on you and baby constantly too. Even if they took baby at night its rarely for long as they return baby when its feeding time.

[sunshineshades]

I'm actually looking forward to getting to room in this time. I never got to with dd, she was released from the nicu in the morning and like an hour later they released her right from the hospital. I cried listening to all the other babies in their rooms with their moms and I didn't have my baby in my room with me.
I realize that's different than having someone take the baby for a couple hours, but I really look forward to getting to cuddle her as much as I want when I want.
And I know the original thread had some horror stories of not having any assistance after labour.

[sctiger]

Reading that thread on parenting really made me think about how tough birth can be for some women. My experience was pretty standard and a normal recovery in general. It made me wonder, do that many people have to have such a rough time? What's going on with maternity care in the US that makes it so rough for everyone? I feel like it shouldn't be that bad, and I'm compelled to believe it's a problem with the system.

[tacocatmom]

Feb 18, 2016 14:53:10 GMT -5 rachelilly23 said:

Feb 18, 2016 14:45:30 GMT -5 @pugsandwine said:

huh?

Something like this?
www.etsy.com/listing/241768096/baby-flower-sandal-feet-orange-summer?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=baby%20girl%20sandals&ref=sr_gallery_15

I'm from Texas and do not like.

[FunniBunni]

Big dogs are awesome, and mine do not slobber. But they shed, ooooooh do they shed.

Rooming in: I like it. I don't like being separated from my baby AT ALL and I see no problem with encouraging that.

BUT

My births have been relatively easy. Also, I very, very, clearly remember when DD1 was born. I had just been given a narcotic minutes before, and then suddenly, she was here. I was drugged out of my mind, and desperately wanted to sleep. My H was deployed in Japan, and I was alone in the hospital. I held her for the first time, and I thought, "I wonder how long I have to hold her so they won't think I'm a bad mom." After a few minutes, I realized I was starting to drop her- and they took her away. I passed out, and felt like a new person when I woke. I'm glad the option was there, and it should be.

While I love rooming in, there HAS to be some provision for moms who can't care for their infants for whatever reason.

My hospital is baby friendly. I didn't have an issue though, as I planned to BF room-in, and felt 1000X better PP than pregnant. That said, we had feeding issues, and were given formula (without hassle) when she wouldn't eat. Also, since we hadn't planned on using formula, and she couldn't latch, the nurse "snuck" me a box of formula to take home so we didn't have to stop at the store on the way home from the hospital. So glad that we had it.

My super late UO: I don't care what the nurses say. As soon as they turn their backs, I'm snuggling my infant and taking a nap with her on my chest. Or curled at my side. In my hospital bed. And no, I don't care that it's not "allowed". I'll apologize to your face, and continue to do it anyway. (As long as I'm not sedated/drugged.)

[halfahippy]

My hospital is baby friendly and they don't have a nursery. The nurses not only encouraged me to sleep with the baby in my arms, they brought in a ton of pillows and made me a little cocoon to prop the baby and I in so we were comfortable and secure and could sleep together. They were super helpful with everything. My recovery was rough, but having the baby with me the whole time didn't make it any harder.